2026-4-27 — Akasha

Scrazzy:I knew it.

Gamemaster:It's him.

Scrazzy:It's him.

Scrazzy:It was his hat.

Gamemaster:You can't just copy what I say.

Scrazzy:He was number one.

Gamemaster:What?

Gamemaster:Oh, Spongebob.

Gamemaster:I know this one.

Gamemaster:That's a Spongebobble.

Gamemaster:You know, one of these days, I'm going to be able to pretend in a conversation with somebody who doesn't know me that I've seen SpongeBob, and it's going to be your fault.

Scrazzy:I do it all the time with other media.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I've noticed.

Gamemaster:Where you'll, like, reference something, and then I'll ask about the media, and you'll be like, oh yeah, I haven't seen it.

Gamemaster:Which is just unhinged behavior, but you've done it multiple times, so... Good for you, I suppose.

Gamemaster:Am I... laggy on your end?

Gamemaster:Because weirdly enough, my video is laggy on my end.

Gamemaster:And I don't know if that's translating.

Gamemaster:I'm just gonna leave it, I don't know.

Ozzie:Perhaps a touch, yes.

Scrazzy:it is like a pulsing blurry like you're being throttled like you'll just and then it'll just blur and then it'll blur solve it

Gamemaster:Am I blurry, too?

Gamemaster:Like... A camera with better ping.

Ozzie:I think that you need a camera with better ping.

Gamemaster:Honestly, that's a good idea.

Gamemaster:I don't understand why it would be like this.

Ozzie:That would probably help.

Ozzie:It happens.

Ozzie:Yo!

Gamemaster:Hello?

Ozzie:Oh, he's got energy.

Scrazzy:Jesus.

Ozzie:Oh, it's going to be a good night.

Gamemaster:Oh, no.

Ozzie:All right.

Ozzie:Hell yeah.

Gamemaster:Oh, no.

Foral:Yo, yo, yo.

Foral:How are y'all?

Ozzie:Very good.

Foral:Have y'all read Noah's book yet?

Ozzie:How was... I'm about halfway.

Gamemaster:No.

Gamemaster:Although, I've recently come into a lot of time on my hands, so I will read the book.

Foral:Oh my goodness.

Foral:Oh no.

Foral:What's up?

Gamemaster:My company laid off all of their American engineers.

Ozzie:Whoa.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:It's a good time.

Foral:Well, that's...

Foral:No bueno.

Scrazzy:Today?

Scrazzy:Oh.

Gamemaster:Uh, no.

Gamemaster:A few days ago.

Foral:Well, I'm sorry, man.

Ozzie:Yeah, that's tough.

Gamemaster:It's fine.

Gamemaster:I needed an excuse to leave anyway.

Gamemaster:They gave it to me, and now they're paying me to do it.

Gamemaster:So, I'll take it.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Well, there is... I'm just going to... I can refer you.

Foral:I'm just going to drop this down here.

Foral:I would play an experimentation so it doesn't drop.

Gamemaster:I'm not, like...

Gamemaster:Oh, sure.

Gamemaster:I'm, like, I'm taking a little bit of time to not do anything and also, like, start doing lead codes and stuff again because I definitely was not doing those.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:So just a couple of things from my company, I will say.

Gamemaster:But I might take you up on it at some point.

Foral:It takes a little bit longer.

Foral:Their interview process is like a couple of months.

Foral:Not because they give you...

Foral:It's mostly because they take some time in between cycles.

Foral:I was not asked a single leak code.

Foral:It can vary, but I wasn't asked at all to program.

Gamemaster:That is fair.

Foral:They looked at my background and they go, he knows how to program.

Foral:I don't know if that's the case with all interviews, but it seems like a lot of people don't necessarily get asked leak codes.

Foral:It's more of the idea they believe they hire smart people, so they're like, we just get a smart person to talk to you.

Foral:And they don't think you're dumb.

Foral:They're like, yeah, you should keep moving forward.

Foral:And I think it's a pretty reasonable strategy.

Foral:And I think that's the type of interviews you do really well on.

Foral:So let me know if you see anything and I can refer you.

Foral:And they take the referrals pretty seriously since it's a pretty small company.

Gamemaster:I mean, I really need to look at the world.

Scrazzy:you you

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:And if you don't see a specific...

Gamemaster:Sure.

Foral:Job that matches your criteria.

Foral:I can also refer you.

Foral:And just tell them that.

Foral:And they're also.

Foral:Depending on their internal openings.

Foral:They'll just make a job.

Foral:So.

Foral:Keep that in mind.

Foral:I think he'd be a good fit.

Foral:I bitch about the company.

Foral:But it's probably where I'm going to die.

Gamemaster:Oh, okay.

Gamemaster:That's good.

Foral:Yeah.

Ozzie:Jorge, can you also tell them that I recommend Josh?

Gamemaster:Yeah, that would be useful.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:I will tell them.

Gamemaster:I think what needs to happen is you need to recommend Tanner first so that they trust Tanner's word.

Gamemaster:And then... No?

Ozzie:Now, you might not want to do that.

Ozzie:Uh, yeah.

Foral:So instead of getting... Instead of...

Foral:Trying to get one of my friends hired.

Foral:The plan is to get one other friend, him get the option to be hired, turn it down, and then refer the other friend.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:So that they, like, respect his opinion and all of that stuff, and then have him refer me.

Gamemaster:That would work.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Yeah, yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:No, but now, really, the real windfall is I have the time to read Noah's book, so that's going to happen.

Foral:Yeah, it's a good book.

Gamemaster:It'll be a good time.

Foral:I will say I had a... I got into it more about halfway through.

Foral:And I think that might just be first... I think it might just be first-time writer.

Gamemaster:It has a slower start.

Foral:No offense to Noah.

Gamemaster:He is a first-time writer.

Foral:But I think... No, I think that's just it.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Foral:Like, something in the beginning, I was just like, I'm kind of lost, man.

Ozzie:So you finished it.

Foral:But...

Foral:I will say definitely by halfway through, I read the last half in a day.

Gamemaster:Oh, you finished it.

Foral:Oh, I'm done.

Ozzie:You're done.

Foral:I'm done.

Ozzie:Wow.

Foral:I noticed... Yeah, go ahead.

Ozzie:Yeah, I think once they all come together, right, which is I'm just here now.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Yeah, so I noticed three distinct stages.

Foral:Leo, leave that.

Foral:Sorry.

Ozzie:there he goes

Gamemaster:Yeah, get rid of him.

Foral:Alright.

Foral:Yeah, so I noticed three distinct stages.

Gamemaster:Got distracted by the dog.

Foral:I'd say the first 50 pages was one.

Foral:Then it was like 50 to like around 100 or 120.

Foral:And then the rest of the book was like really, really good.

Gamemaster:So, Tanner, you said you're halfway through, right?

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:So that means you're just getting to the good part now.

Ozzie:Yeah, I, last night, got to page, like, 230.

Ozzie:And the, like, full group of, like, characters have, like, come together and are, like... Actually, the chapter that I just read was, like, making the plan chapter.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Yeah, so around there, I think it starts getting much better, too.

Foral:It also really does feel like a D&D world, which is really fun.

Ozzie:Right.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Foral:It did read well like that.

Ozzie:But he does his own stuff, which I enjoy, because it reads like a D&D world, so then I have my notions of, like, D&D, but it's got its own stuff going on as well.

Foral:It's also...

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:He also made his own races, and then I was like, oh, that's kind of like a Hobbit thing.

Ozzie:Right.

Foral:But at first I was like, what the fuck is this weird thing?

Foral:Yeah.

Ozzie:Yeah, yeah.

Gamemaster:a legally distinct hobbit.

Scrazzy:Yeah, you get

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:It is good.

Foral:And I also personally have an issue with fantasy worlds with when you're first reading the book, and then sometimes there's chapters where there's just a lot of people at once.

Foral:And I'm like, I don't know what any of these fake names mean.

Foral:I don't know who these people are.

Ozzie:Not really.

Foral:But that's kind of a new thing.

Foral:That's just a thing where you're reading new material, but I'm just like, ugh.

Gamemaster:Are there any characters with apostrophes in the name?

Gamemaster:Because that's a classic fantasy thing.

Foral:No.

Ozzie:I don't think so, actually.

Foral:I don't think so.

Gamemaster:Lame.

Foral:Yeah, but I will say, one of the characters, you'll read in the very beginning, their name is spelled like Kane.

Foral:It is not pronounced like that.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Ozzie:Josh read the first three chapters.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I read the initial stuff, so I know about that.

Foral:Oh, okay.

Foral:Okay.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Which, when I actually read through the book, I have no doubt the entire time I'm just going to call him King in my head.

Foral:Yeah.

Ozzie:Well, here's actually what trips me up related to that is there's Kane who works at a tavern.

Foral:And then...

Ozzie:and the owner of the tavern is named Drain, D-R-A-N-E, but it's pronounced Ayn, you know, so I get them flipped up.

Foral:uh-huh it's pronounced aid oh okay yeah i don't know yeah yeah

Gamemaster:Instead of Drane?

Ozzie:I think it's... No, no, I think it's Drain.

Ozzie:Sorry, I removed the D-R.

Scrazzy:you you

Ozzie:I'm pretty sure his name is Drain, but the other guy is Kane, and so I'm trying in my head to do one and not the other, and then sometimes I flip, and...

Gamemaster:How do you know his name isn't Drane?

Ozzie:Well, Noah makes a point of calling out the pronunciation for Kane and he is like of a different racial background than Drain.

Ozzie:I'm fairly certain.

Gamemaster:Uh...

Foral:And so is the other character pronounced I-Core?

Ozzie:Oh, you know, Noah said it last week.

Foral:I think... I think it's I-Core because the way Noah conveys the spelling is he normally has a character and then another character mispronounce it and then get corrected, which happened again.

Ozzie:I did feed the cat.

Scrazzy:Wasn't it?

Ozzie:Yeah.

Gamemaster:What complicates that is that some people call the God's blood Ikor as well.

Ozzie:Yeah, I think he said I-Core last week.

Foral:Okay, yeah.

Foral:Because when the character got brought out, someone was like, Icar, like the god's blood?

Foral:And he's like, no.

Foral:So I was like, all right, I guess it's Icar.

Foral:Oh, no.

Gamemaster:So it's neither of those.

Ozzie:Hmm.

Gamemaster:It's some third pronunciation.

Foral:Okay.

Foral:But yeah.

Foral:And yeah, that was fun.

Foral:Anguilla?

Foral:Fantastic place.

Ozzie:I was going to ask.

Foral:I have never had such low cortisol.

Foral:It was amazing.

Ozzie:I actually don't really know where that is.

Foral:You know what's funny about it is everyone that I talked, like everyone that I met there, there was about 80% chance that they'd say, so how'd you find out about Anguilla?

Foral:And I'm like, dude, you're born here.

Foral:But everyone was just like...

Gamemaster:The name of the capital is The Valley.

Foral:How do you know about this place?

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:That's neat.

Foral:It's not a thing, really.

Foral:All the license plates say... Yeah, it has, I think, the lowest GDP or second lowest GDP of all of the Caribbean islands.

Gamemaster:Its total population is 3,000.

Foral:It is just...

Ozzie:So you can kind of explore.

Foral:A delightful small island that specifically makes it really, really hard for foreigners to buy land.

Foral:And they're just like, we're happy.

Foral:The resort we stayed at was fantastic.

Foral:We also rented a car and drove around.

Foral:I think it also has the lowest crime rate of anywhere in the Caribbean.

Scrazzy:you

Foral:Very, very nice.

Foral:Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Foral:And everyone spoke English, too.

Foral:Yeah, so they drive on the wrong side of the road, but their steering wheels are on the right side of the road.

Gamemaster:It used to be a British colony, which I assume has something to do with it.

Gamemaster:When I went to St.

Gamemaster:Thomas, it was similar.

Gamemaster:It's a little terrifying that they import American cars, but they use British roads.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:So they get the worst combination there, if you just can't see around corners when you make turns.

Foral:Yeah.

Ozzie:get into a crash.

Gamemaster:Their national GDP is 13 times smaller than BU's endowment.

Foral:We also... Sorry, go ahead.

Gamemaster:which is crazy.

Foral:Yeah, no, it was amazing.

Foral:And then the hotel we stayed at, I spent all of my credit card points, and I haven't spent a single point ever.

Foral:So since I got a credit card at senior year of college, I mean, I didn't really spend that much in college.

Foral:But in general, I just sunk all of my Amex points directly into this vacation.

Ozzie:I mean, that's a good way to use it.

Foral:So we were able to go to what some people think is the nicest hotel in the Caribbean, and I just didn't pay for it.

Gamemaster:nice nice out of curiosity

Foral:And I was like, there is seven years of credit card points.

Foral:And there was a deal going on, so I got a great exchange, and it just worked out.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:I saw Maggie Gyllenhaal, Jake Gyllenhaal's sister.

Ozzie:Ah, there you go.

Gamemaster:Did you know what Maggie Gyllenhaal looked like and you saw them and were like, oh, that's Jake Gyllenhaal's sister?

Foral:So she has a really distinct face, but I didn't know she was a Gyllenhaal.

Gamemaster:Ah.

Foral:So when I saw her at breakfast at the resort, I said to Bailey, there's Rachel from The Dark Knight.

Foral:And then she said, Maggie Gyllenhaal.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Foral:And I said, oh.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:But that answers my question of she has also separately been in movies.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Because I was going to say, like, if you asked me what the random sibling of some random celebrity is, I wouldn't know who that is off the top of my head.

Foral:Yes, yes.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:But she is an actor in her own right.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Yes.

Foral:And she recently produced the Frankenstein movie, which I'm pretty sure bombed.

Gamemaster:Hmm.

Foral:But she was there and she had like little sunglasses on, but her face is so distinct.

Foral:I was just like, that's not hiding from anyone.

Foral:So then we're like, is it her?

Foral:I don't know.

Foral:So then we're like, who's she married to?

Foral:And she's married to a Skarsgård, I think.

Foral:But we looked him up and we were just like...

Gamemaster:Thank you.

Foral:Oh, that's the guy like that.

Foral:That's definitely the husband.

Foral:That's definitely her.

Foral:And she also took the same flight as us back, but it got delayed.

Foral:And I'm pretty sure in airports, there's like a special room for rich people.

Foral:But since it got delayed last minute, she ended up coming outside to sit with the commoners and there was stuck there for like an hour and a half.

Foral:And it was so funny because at one point you could see she was getting really annoyed.

Foral:No one knew who she was besides me, I guess.

Foral:And then she was talking to her husband, and her husband's also an actor, but was just like... So then she went to the gate agent, and you could see she was trying to jazz him up.

Foral:And then came back, looked even more mad, and then started going on the phone to talk to people.

Ozzie:He's going to buy the country.

Foral:She ended up staying.

Foral:And it was like... Yeah, it was like two hours late or something.

Gamemaster:Bye.

Foral:And at one point I was like, should we just move our flights and get a hotel room on St.

Foral:Martin?

Foral:Because that's where the airport is.

Foral:And then seeing her, I was just like, well, if Maggie Gyllenhaal is still waiting for this flight, I can't find anything better.

Foral:So I'm just going to stay.

Ozzie:What, do you take a boat to St.

Foral:Yeah.

Ozzie:Martin or something?

Foral:Yes.

Foral:So there's no direct flights from New York to Anguilla because they have a really small runway on the island.

Foral:So most flights go to St.

Foral:Martin and then you take a Færrin from St.

Foral:Martin.

Foral:You take a boat from there to Anguilla and then a taxi.

Foral:If you can fly from Miami, you can get a direct flight.

Foral:But we did not do that.

Foral:And the hotel offered to coordinate the pickup for us.

Foral:And we were like, oh, sure, thinking it was going to be covered.

Foral:And then they're like, great, we can arrange a private charter for you and like a SUV to pick you up.

Scrazzy:you

Foral:And then we looked at the numbers.

Foral:We're like, this is $1,000.

Foral:We're not doing that.

Gamemaster:You don't want that?

Foral:We just got...

Foral:We looked on Reddit.

Foral:They said, don't use the public commuter Færrin because it reeks of fish because everyone brings their fish there.

Foral:So we went through a charter company and then it was like 20 bucks a person.

Foral:And then the taxis are standardized by the government.

Foral:So it's like 20 bucks.

Foral:So we're like, we can either spend a thousand dollars or like 40 bucks.

Foral:So we're like, all right, let's just do that.

Gamemaster:But one of those gets you there in style.

Foral:It does.

Foral:But I'm pretty sure they chartered through the same company.

Ozzie:Do your Reddit research.

Foral:So... I just went bang money for no reason.

Scrazzy:I do think it's very funny that it's just like, well, who's her husband?

Scrazzy:It's like a Skarsgård.

Scrazzy:Oh, so the other acting family that has a very distinct face shape.

Foral:But I think it's a different Skarsgård.

Gamemaster:Sarsgaard, not Skarsgård.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Oh, that's what it was.

Scrazzy:What do you mean?

Foral:I was like, cause I looked him up and he was like the most American there was.

Foral:So I was like, all right.

Scrazzy:Oh, he's Skarsgård.

Scrazzy:Oh, I see.

Gamemaster:It's a different guy.

Foral:Yeah.

Scrazzy:It's close enough, though.

Scrazzy:He looks like a Skarsgård.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I've been looking through the wiki page for Angular and it's crazy.

Gamemaster:There are nine schools in the country.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Total.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:It's crazy.

Gamemaster:Which makes sense because there are only 15,000 people.

Gamemaster:But they have the .ai URL.

Foral:Yeah!

Gamemaster:Like, they own that TLD.

Gamemaster:So anytime you go to an AI website, they purchased it from Angela.

Foral:Yeah, and what's funny, too, is we read about that before, and we got there like, oh my god, this is the AI island that's getting a bunch of money, and they have billboards being like, thank you, AI!

Scrazzy:Also, they have a low GDP, but they do not have a low GDP per capita.

Foral:This was the resort.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:No, because they don't let foreigners by.

Foral:So then there's a bunch of nice resorts there.

Foral:And then they all just kind of work there.

Foral:So like at our resort, there was a thing you can go like fishing with Sean.

Foral:But I think it was going to be like a grant.

Foral:And I'm like, I'm not going to pay a grant to just fish with some guy.

Gamemaster:So, the GDP per capita is $30,000.

Scrazzy:Who's Sean?

Gamemaster:I don't know what an average GDP per capita is.

Scrazzy:I thought it was like 80 or 100.

Gamemaster:Like, what is it for America?

Gamemaster:Well, okay, that's fair.

Gamemaster:That's probably not... What's another Caribbean island?

Foral:See a Dominican Republic.

Foral:That's one of the big boys in the Caribbean.

Gamemaster:Uh... $11,000.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Or try Puerto Rico.

Foral:I think Puerto Rico is one of the most well-off there.

Foral:Actually, St.

Gamemaster:Puerto Rico is the U.S.

Foral:Barth is going to be... Yeah, I know, but I mean in the Caribbean, just like... They should have a... No?

Gamemaster:They're not even in the Caribbean.

Foral:Yeah, they are.

Ozzie:Antigua, perhaps?

Scrazzy:in the caribbean i mean it's comparable to it's above portugal lithuania greece croatia poland

Gamemaster:Bahamas is 39.

Gamemaster:Antigua and Barbuda is 23.

Gamemaster:They're definitely on the higher end.

Gamemaster:Which...

Foral:Yeah, but Portugal has a lower GDP than countries it's conquered.

Gamemaster:Reese?

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Yeah, Europe actually has really low GDPs.

Foral:I think England, for the first time recently, they pay more in welfare than they make in income tax.

Scrazzy:France has a, you know, if you retire in France or like the retirement age population of people that are on pensions currently make like 110% the average salary of someone not on pensions.

Foral:Well, they tried pushing the years up by like two years and people just like basically rioted.

Foral:Yeah.

Scrazzy:They took off one of Macron's eyelids and he stopped that.

Foral:So.

Foral:We did a the I think they only have suites.

Foral:We did the lowest tier suite and it was a beautiful, beautiful place.

Foral:We're chatting with some of the workers there.

Foral:And one of them was like, oh, you know, like, basically you can get whatever you want.

Foral:Like, if you want a birthday cake at 4 a.m., we'll try to figure it out.

Foral:And I was just like, I don't want to pay for that.

Foral:But then... Kinda.

Gamemaster:But did you want a birthday cake at 4 a.m.

Gamemaster:?

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Foral:That's when she said it.

Foral:But then she was saying that... She's like, you know, like, all these villas, like, they're designed for, like, us to be able to modify them.

Foral:So she's like, so when someone buys the whole resort out, we could just, like, move all this stuff out of this room.

Foral:And I was like, why?

Foral:She's like, well, sometimes people want it for storage.

Foral:And I'm like, they're going to fill a beachfront resort for storage.

Foral:So then I asked, how often does it get bought out?

Foral:And she's like, you know, like three to four times a season.

Foral:You know, like sometimes someone might do like a baby moon.

Foral:And I was like, a fucking baby moon?

Gamemaster:You can't have people around when you just had a baby.

Gamemaster:Like... So you buy out the whole resort.

Foral:No.

Foral:And then also...

Foral:Bailey got me this shirt from Notre Dame.

Foral:And it says, like, Notre Dame and then the bottom it says football.

Foral:And I've never worn it in public because I had this, like, fear that I'm going to walk in public and someone's going to be like, you didn't play for Notre Dame.

Foral:And I'm like, obviously I didn't play.

Foral:It's for the football department.

Foral:The first time I ever wore it in public, I was walking down the beach from breakfast.

Foral:And they're like, Harbormaster, like this large Jamaican man.

Foral:pointed at me and goes, you didn't play for Notre Dame football.

Foral:I was like, yeah.

Ozzie:Well, it's not going back on.

Foral:And he's like, why do you have it?

Foral:I was just like, it was a gift.

Foral:Then he's just like, you're not nearly big enough.

Foral:I was like, thanks, man.

Ozzie:Tell him you were a kicker.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Foral:And then he was just like, you know, I don't,

Foral:I don't really like pro football.

Foral:You know, cricket's the sport of Anguilla, but no one likes it.

Foral:We all like football.

Foral:I'm a college football guy.

Foral:They care more.

Foral:That being said, I know the Lauders.

Foral:And I was just like, what?

Foral:And he's like, the owners of the Eagles.

Foral:They come here every year.

Foral:And I'm like, okay.

Foral:And he's like, they're quarterbacks.

Foral:Like, sign some of my boards.

Foral:And I was like, cool, man.

Foral:Thanks.

Scrazzy:Bye.

Foral:Thanks.

Foral:I'm sorry for wearing this shirt.

Foral:I know you know the Eagles now.

Gamemaster:Stolen valor.

Foral:I'm sorry.

Foral:All right?

Foral:He was the only grumpy person in all of Anguilla that I chatted with, and he was so grumpy.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:No, he was right to be angry.

Gamemaster:Shouldn't have warned it in public.

Gamemaster:He might be the only grumpy person in Anguilla.

Gamemaster:You don't know?

Foral:He might be.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Very grumpy guy, but... I then started paddleboarding because they let you, like...

Foral:They have paddle boards, kayaks that you can just take.

Foral:I've never paddle board before.

Gamemaster:Thank you.

Foral:So I fell.

Foral:And then I got back.

Foral:And it was going well.

Foral:And then he started shouting instructions from the shore.

Foral:And he was just making it worse.

Foral:He was giving me just terrible instructions.

Foral:He's like, don't look down.

Foral:Look up.

Foral:And I was like, everyone else is looking down.

Foral:He's like, dig deeper.

Foral:Dig deeper.

Foral:Turn.

Foral:Lock your knees.

Foral:Stand up.

Foral:Lock your knees.

Foral:Bend your knees, bend your knees.

Foral:And I was like, all right, dude, can you just shut up?

Foral:And he thought he was helping.

Foral:And I was like, I started falling so much when you started helping me.

Gamemaster:Yeah, but you were falling with good form before you were standing with bad form.

Foral:He countered.

Foral:He said, don't bend your knees.

Foral:And then told me to bend my knees.

Foral:And it was flip-flop.

Foral:But yeah, other than that, great vacation.

Gamemaster:You got a flip flop.

Foral:Honestly, he was so grumpy.

Foral:It was funny.

Foral:His name was Elvis.

Ozzie:You're too small.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Scrazzy:The grumpy person honed in on Jorge.

Foral:Yeah.

Scrazzy:It's just like, where's the funniest guy to piss off on the whole island?

Scrazzy:It's just like, you didn't play for Notre Dame.

Scrazzy:Yelling the wrong instructions.

Scrazzy:Maybe if you were big enough to play for Notre Dame, you wouldn't be falling as much on that fucking paddle.

Foral:It was so funny that it was literally like my worst nightmare.

Gamemaster:Thank you.

Foral:You, you didn't play.

Foral:Why do you have it?

Foral:You answer that question.

Scrazzy:It's such a psycho thought to have.

Ozzie:Yeah, it kind of sounds like...

Scrazzy:And there have been so many times where I was like, why don't you wear this?

Scrazzy:And I'm just like, I don't want people to ask me about the show, like a shirt from a show.

Scrazzy:I don't want people to ask me about it or be like, oh, you fucking love that thing?

Scrazzy:You fucking love that thing?

Scrazzy:I love that thing.

Scrazzy:And it's going to feel weird.

Scrazzy:And she's like, whatever, okay.

Scrazzy:So you've just validated every time that I'm like, no, I don't want a shirt referencing things.

Scrazzy:I don't know enough about it.

Foral:Who wore like a Patriot shirt was going to be like, you're not a Patriot.

Foral:I know the Eagles.

Scrazzy:You bought that jersey in a store, right?

Scrazzy:There's no way the team gave you one.

Scrazzy:You couldn't play for them.

Ozzie:You're not Travis Kelsey.

Scrazzy:You don't even have the same hair as if you're trying to pass yourself off as Travis Kelsey.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Yeah, it was pretty funny.

Foral:Yeah, I highly recommend the island, though.

Foral:I just recommend credit card points or going to a different resort.

Foral:Anguilla has other islands?

Gamemaster:Did you see what the other islands in Anguilla are called, other than the main one?

Gamemaster:Because there are four total.

Gamemaster:Yeah, there are three islands associated with it, besides Anguilla.

Foral:Oh, Prickle Pear, right?

Gamemaster:That's not listed on this map.

Gamemaster:I mean, maybe.

Gamemaster:The ones I see are Dog Island, Scrub Island, and Sombrero.

Foral:Oh, well, there were day trips.

Foral:So... We... Apparently Anguilla has really good food.

Gamemaster:Which is, you know, good names for islands.

Ozzie:There's also Sandy Island?

Gamemaster:Hmm.

Foral:What everyone was telling us.

Gamemaster:Did you eat like out of the resort?

Foral:We ate out of the resort once.

Foral:But then we also got other wrecks.

Foral:And the food was just like, oh, you gotta have it.

Foral:They're really good ribs.

Foral:And Bailey and I are like, we're not really ribs people.

Foral:And also, we're here for the beach.

Foral:We live in New York City.

Foral:We can get really good food in New York.

Gamemaster:Beach ribs.

Foral:We're like, I don't know.

Foral:I'd rather just be on the beach than eat ribs from Anguilla like somewhere else because we have to drive there, get the food.

Scrazzy:you

Gamemaster:I mean, I assume there was food on the resort as well.

Foral:We're like, no.

Foral:Yeah, it was pretty good.

Foral:It was pretty good.

Foral:But like, I don't know about you guys, but I have a problem where every time I travel now, I'm always just like, New York kind of has really good food.

Foral:So I never expect amazing food elsewhere.

Foral:Yeah, no, all of New York, like Long Island has good food.

Gamemaster:You're snooting.

Gamemaster:That's what you're saying.

Foral:The city has good food.

Foral:Whenever I go somewhere else, I'm just expecting it to not be the best food I've had.

Gamemaster:I mean, for what it's worth...

Foral:And that's fine.

Ozzie:We had a kind of similar thought in Italy.

Ozzie:The food that we had in Italy was all great, but everybody that you talk to is like, the Italian food is like, you never have you had food like the food in Italy.

Foral:Bailey said the same thing.

Ozzie:And I'm like, I don't know, some of the Italian restaurants I've been to around here are pretty good.

Scrazzy:Yeah.

Foral:I didn't want to seem like an asshole.

Ozzie:Now, I had some great meals.

Foral:She's literally just like, I've had better.

Ozzie:I had great meals while I was there, but Liz and I were both like, okay, I'm not feeling like my world is being transformed, like some people say.

Foral:Yeah.

Ozzie:But then I think about the family from Kansas that we met, and I'm like, okay, they're comparing this to Olive Garden, you know.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Foral:Yeah.

Scrazzy:They're used to dog food.

Scrazzy:Yeah.

Ozzie:Right.

Foral:And it's so funny when I have family from outside of New York visit, and we bring them to, like, a good place, but it's not, like, the best place.

Foral:And they're like, oh, my God, this is amazing.

Foral:And we're like, coffee's chopped.

Scrazzy:act like you've been here.

Scrazzy:The waiter's staring at us.

Foral:Bailey.

Foral:Tanner said when he and Liz went to Italy, they had better food in New York.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Get me out of here.

Foral:Yep.

Foral:She agrees.

Foral:If you couldn't hear.

Ozzie:She did actually cut out a lot, but it sounded like she was agreeing.

Foral:Yeah, I figured.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:So.

Foral:I think also part of the reason with the Italians is, I don't know if you guys ever seen cooking videos on Instagram, but they're angry people.

Foral:If you do one thing that their Nona doesn't do, they get upset.

Gamemaster:I do think Italians on the internet talking about Italian food are playing it up into the stereotype.

Foral:And then Americans are like, fuck it.

Foral:We ball.

Gamemaster:I don't know if all of Italian food is like you can't make alterations or anything like that.

Gamemaster:I think it's more for the bit.

Foral:Really, Josh?

Foral:Name five Italians.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:I can't do that.

Gamemaster:I don't know any Italians.

Gamemaster:I can name five Italian Americans.

Foral:Bobby Flay?

Gamemaster:I'm related to a bunch of them.

Gamemaster:But I got Patrick Romanello.

Gamemaster:I got Marissa Romanello.

Gamemaster:I got Stan Romanello.

Gamemaster:I don't know you.

Foral:Hey, hey.

Gamemaster:Stop pointing at yourself.

Gamemaster:I was just going to keep naming people in my family.

Gamemaster:But that's actually not a fair approximation because they don't cook.

Gamemaster:So, you know.

Scrazzy:So they're not real Italians.

Gamemaster:They're not real Italians.

Gamemaster:No, actually, they order a ton of food from Italian restaurants.

Scrazzy:Wow.

Ozzie:They can't do it themselves.

Foral:I also officially closed on the house.

Scrazzy:That's close enough.

Gamemaster:It's not can't, it's won't and shouldn't because I've seen them try.

Ozzie:Let's absolutely go...

Foral:So we will allegedly have it April 1st.

Scrazzy:Ooh.

Gamemaster:What is... Oh.

Gamemaster:I, um... Question.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Do you have any plans... Like, I don't know how it works with the builder, but, like, do you have plans for doing, like, low-voltage wiring for, like, you know, lighting and all that kind of stuff?

Foral:I'm already in talks.

Gamemaster:Okay, the reason I ask is because that is my dad's occupation, and I can ask him to look at blueprints and stuff if that would be useful to you.

Foral:Okay.

Foral:So they will get electrical stuff later.

Foral:Also, one side thing, I'll probably message you about it.

Foral:I was thinking maybe getting space for a rack.

Foral:But then I saw that if you want, like, a real space, you should also get, like, fans and then humidifier, like, things to check humidity.

Gamemaster:Well...

Foral:Is that all needed?

Foral:Or, like, what point is it needed?

Foral:Is it, like, for you?

Gamemaster:So I will say, one second.

Foral:Or... Because my thing is I don't think I'm going to be able to afford to buy a house and then immediately buy a server.

Foral:So I just want to, like...

Foral:Set myself up for stages.

Gamemaster:So that closet back there, this closet back here, one second, has in it, that's a 12U rack.

Foral:And I know you don't.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:That's like a mid-size rack.

Foral:12 years.

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:because you can see that thing over there, the computer is for you, and then I have a router and a patch and that stuff on top of it.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:The full rack.

Gamemaster:A full rack would go all the way up to the ceiling of that.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:40 is like the tallest consumer grade one you would get.

Foral:Is that 40?

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:You can get taller than that, but you don't need a 40U rack.

Foral:No, no, no, I'm not.

Gamemaster:I don't know what you would put into it.

Foral:I'm not planning on... I'm not planning on getting a 40-year.

Gamemaster:You don't need a 40U rack.

Gamemaster:Like...

Gamemaster:This one, I think if I went up to 16, I would fill it up and then I would never need to put anything else into it because that's more than enough room.

Foral:Yeah, yeah.

Gamemaster:But I will say, that closet used to not have ventilation and it would hit 100 degrees in there.

Gamemaster:So I had to drill holes and add fans into it.

Foral:You were telling me about that.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:If you're planning on putting it into an enclosed space, it needs ventilation.

Foral:Do you think I need a humidifier?

Gamemaster:You definitely don't need a humidifier here.

Foral:Or whatever that is.

Gamemaster:you might want to chuck a really cheap humidity sensor in there and look at it every once in a while to make sure it's not getting too, too humid.

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:But I wouldn't worry, assuming it's inside your house, about that particular issue.

Gamemaster:You will long run into the issue of components dying from heat and from general time than you will from humidity.

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:So...

Foral:I'm planning to put it in the basement.

Foral:And it'll be unfinished, but I'm going to put some weights and then that.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Foral:That's my plan.

Foral:And they're going to be running at least now Cat6 cables everywhere, including by the TV stations, which is very nice.

Gamemaster:That's fine.

Gamemaster:That'll be a warm basement, probably.

Foral:Here we go.

Gamemaster:But, you know, because these things, they are heaters.

Gamemaster:They pump out a ton of heat.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:But if it's not going in an enclosed space, you don't need to add any additional ventilation.

Scrazzy:Jorge, I noticed you did not mention your recent large five person table commission for the game room that you'll develop in your basement.

Gamemaster:It'll be like the whole basement, whatever.

Foral:Gotcha, gotcha.

Gamemaster:But if you're planning on chucking it in a closet in the basement or something like that, then you definitely need to put in some kind of holes for ventilation.

Foral:Gotcha, gotcha.

Foral:I will look to put something, a game room in the basement.

Gamemaster:A five-person table is such an awkward number of people to situate around a table.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Like, for that table to be designed for five people?

Foral:It's gotta have like a triangle or something.

Foral:Make sure the end specifically cannot have six.

Gamemaster:Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:Oh, I saw a post of somebody who, like, commissioned a game table, and it's so ugly, but it does look like it's for five people.

Gamemaster:Let me see if I can, like, find it.

Foral:Hmm.

Gamemaster:I don't know if I'm going to be able to... No.

Gamemaster:I googled Star Destroyer because it looked like a Star Destroyer, but when I do that, the only thing that comes up is people who have tables for housing their LEGO Star Destroyers, which is not what I'm looking for.

Gamemaster:Does Wyrmwood still exist?

Scrazzy:Wormwood makes tables?

Foral:I'm shocked.

Scrazzy:Yeah.

Foral:I'm shocked they still exist.

Gamemaster:I am too, because I feel like there's a pretty low ceiling on that market.

Gamemaster:And I also vaguely recall there being some sexual assault controversies with the company.

Scrazzy:No such thing as bad for us.

Foral:I don't know about that.

Gamemaster:Now I have to double check that I'm not just making stuff.

Gamemaster:Wyrmwood Gaming faced significant controversy in 2023 regarding allegations of sexual assault misconduct in a toxic work environment, compounded by a widely criticized defensive response video.

Gamemaster:These issues led to business partners severing ties.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Foral:Do you guys want to go in on a table?

Ozzie:Oh, they've got standing desks now?

Gamemaster:Standing gaming desk?

Gamemaster:You press a button and then everybody needs to stand up at the same time?

Ozzie:No, it's just like... No, it's not for gaming.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Ozzie:It's just... Modular sit-stand desk.

Gamemaster:It's just a desk.

Ozzie:Now live on Kickstarter.

Gamemaster:I guess they hit the cap of the market.

Foral:The one I specced is $39,000.

Scrazzy:what do I get in the divorce wait wait I don't even see the hold on I don't even see the I feel like

Gamemaster:Sorry.

Gamemaster:3900?

Foral:That's why I thought they went out of business because they're so expensive.

Gamemaster:39,000?

Gamemaster:Oh yeah, if you get the Macassar Ebony one, it's 39,000.

Foral:Granted, that's... Yeah, but let's not act like the cheap one is reasonable either.

Ozzie:Holy crap.

Gamemaster:12 grand is also ridiculous.

Foral:It's 12 grand.

Foral:That's absurd.

Foral:I don't know how to build a table, but I could build one for that.

Gamemaster:Like, furniture?

Gamemaster:Furniture with rare hardwoods definitely does get pretty expensive.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:But if your budget for a table is $12,000, I feel like you just get a really nice regular table.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:And then you use that.

Ozzie:Yeah, but this table is modular.

Gamemaster:But... What is the point of the rising surface?

Ozzie:And it has a rising surface.

Foral:So you can preset your... Yeah.

Ozzie:So you could put it down and then make it just a regular table.

Gamemaster:Ah, of course.

Foral:So you're...

Gamemaster:I see.

Foral:Yeah, the other problem with this, too, is that we just use Foundry, so... Yeah, unless we kick Noah out.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I have seen videos of those people that put a cheap 42-inch LCD TV into a table to act as a digital map, and I think those are neat.

Gamemaster:I think part of the problem is that I don't think there will ever be a point in which our group regularly meets up in person again.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Which obviously isn't happening.

Ozzie:Or unless we get Noah to move to New York.

Gamemaster:Which also obviously isn't happening.

Foral:Yeah.

Ozzie:No, probably not.

Gamemaster:So... I see... I feel like it's more likely that one of us moves out to Colorado than it is that Noah moves out to New York.

Foral:No.

Foral:It's probably true.

Gamemaster:So...

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:It's just.

Gamemaster:And, like, it would be absolutely no fun for anyone if the four of us got together and then, like, Noah zoomed in.

Gamemaster:Just because I feel like that would be a good experience for him.

Foral:It wouldn't be fun.

Foral:No, and it would be so awkward, it would be a bad experience for us.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Foral:Oh, you didn't hear that?

Gamemaster:Which is unfortunate.

Foral:Sorry, Tanner passed me a slice of pizza.

Foral:Don't worry about it.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I think we might have to restrict in-person events to when one or all of us makes the trip over to the other one.

Gamemaster:At which point, I don't think the $39,000 gaming table is as good of an investment with that.

Foral:Yeah.

Scrazzy:I thought that was sort of the...

Foral:I mean, we can do...

Ozzie:Just set up a folding table at that point for sure.

Foral:Yeah, I was going to say, to be honest with you guys, at least for the foreseeable future, it's going to be a folding table.

Foral:Or we could do it in the dining room.

Gamemaster:You're going to have multiple tables in your house.

Ozzie:Perfect.

Gamemaster:I think you'll be able to manage.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:We also, not to invite myself over, Tanner, you got to host a D&D thing for us.

Gamemaster:Do you... You do, because... I know he was planning on doing it, but I thought that was a few months down the line.

Ozzie:Good point.

Foral:oh yeah yeah yeah

Ozzie:Actually, does anyone know if Noah ended up scheduling any kind of New York trip yet?

Ozzie:He mentioned that like a month or two ago.

Ozzie:It did seem like he was planning on a year Scale.

Gamemaster:I'll just take a screenshot of that question from the transcript and send it in the Discord so that he knows that we were asking about him.

Scrazzy:They don't have to worry about it.

Ozzie:We'll have to interrogate him next week.

Foral:Tanner, stop using the N-word.

Ozzie:Stop!

Ozzie:Oh my god!

Gamemaster:Not again.

Scrazzy:It was cut out.

Gamemaster:Craig automatically censors.

Scrazzy:It was removed.

Gamemaster:Don't worry, we're fine.

Gamemaster:Now, the real problem is that I put in the metadata for the transcripts for the website all of our full names so that whenever you Google the name, the first thing that comes up is Tanner saying slurs.

Foral:Oh.

Foral:It's Google Index, so you Google Tanner Nobby.

Gamemaster:So, yeah.

Scrazzy:The AI overview?

Scrazzy:Tanner Nabe is most known for saying slurs during G&D sessions.

Foral:His friends have to constantly tell him to stop saying...

Ozzie:No, guys, I have... I have much...

Scrazzy:Because the AI overview would totally read it and not understand the sarcasm.

Gamemaster:I think.

Gamemaster:I just double-checked.

Gamemaster:I'm pretty sure that, fortunately, Google does not index that particular website.

Foral:You probably aren't on search rankings.

Gamemaster:And I'm not going to opt into it at any point.

Gamemaster:So, your slurs are safe, Tanner.

Foral:Do you have a robot.txt?

Gamemaster:Uh, no.

Foral:You can specifically opt out.

Gamemaster:Actually, maybe?

Gamemaster:Do you?

Foral:You can also sign up for the FTC opt out, which means they will not surface any of it, but that's a separate flag.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I don't have it.

Gamemaster:Is it robot.txt or robots.txt?

Foral:Robots, I believe.

Gamemaster:It doesn't matter.

Gamemaster:I don't have either.

Gamemaster:A sitemap?

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I do.

Gamemaster:Why do I have a sitemap?

Foral:For crawlers.

Gamemaster:But I don't want crawlers.

Gamemaster:I think I might just remove the sitemap.

Foral:Yeah, well.

Foral:Or just put a robots.txt and say, no, bitches.

Gamemaster:Do that.

Gamemaster:Either way, the important bit is that Tanner's slurring is safe.

Scrazzy:Get him out of here.

Foral:Hey, each cup holder on Wyrmwood is $70.

Ozzie:You get a coaster.

Gamemaster:Each what is $70?

Foral:Cup holder.

Scrazzy:Mm-hmm.

Scrazzy:That's worth it.

Scrazzy:That's like 10 sodas.

Foral:The mug holders are 90.

Gamemaster:It is...

Gamemaster:I do think it would be funny, though, if, like, you get this table and then there are only three cup holders.

Gamemaster:Because you're like, did I really need a cup holder for everybody?

Gamemaster:I'm not going to spend the extra $70 for that.

Gamemaster:Sorry.

Foral:Well, cup holders for five people is $350.

Foral:That's crazy.

Gamemaster:What are the modular things that you can get?

Gamemaster:Oh, a phone holder?

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:A vault?

Gamemaster:A shelf for your Monopoly money?

Gamemaster:What's the difference between a mug holder and a cup holder?

Gamemaster:Is the mug holder just larger?

Foral:I don't know but it's more money.

Scrazzy:feel like it has a part open for the handle but i don't know oh here's less material let me charge you more money ah orc is one of the most expensive materials

Gamemaster:Oh, no, it's just shallower so that you don't have to worry about the handle hitting the side.

Gamemaster:No, but it comes with a removable cork coaster.

Gamemaster:So... Yeah.

Ozzie:Hmm.

Gamemaster:Oh, okay, well, so the large cup holder does go for up to $175 if you want it to be more expensive.

Scrazzy:If you just pick the... If you pick the ebony... That feels worth it.

Gamemaster:If you pick a more expensive wood.

Gamemaster:If you wanted an ebony wood.

Scrazzy:Yeah, we went with the $12,000 table, but all the cup holders are ebony because that's what you're looking at most of the time anyway.

Gamemaster:Are people angry at...

Scrazzy:We saved $37,000 or $20,000, whatever.

Foral:They should be.

Gamemaster:I'm looking at some of these woods and I like... I feel like some of them are maybe endangered?

Scrazzy:Why do you think they're expensive, Josh?

Gamemaster:Like, are there people angry at Wyrmwood for using, like, deforesting rare trees to make gaming tables?

Scrazzy:How much bloodwood is here?

Scrazzy:Is this conflict-free wood?

Scrazzy:A bin to store the toppers.

Gamemaster:What?

Scrazzy:is 455 dollars i don't know why they said it starts at 300. that's

Foral:This is why I thought Wyrmwood would be out of business.

Gamemaster:Well, it starts at 300.

Foral:But it turns out they only need to sell two tables a year and be fine.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay, so explain to me how if I just want to buy the coasters, they're $4 each, but the mug holder, which comes with the coaster, starts at at least $20 more than the cup holder.

Scrazzy:Convenience.

Gamemaster:Convenience.

Scrazzy:You don't have to click checkout with one extra thing in your car.

Gamemaster:Who's buying wet erase markers from Wormwood?

Scrazzy:How much?

Gamemaster:A set of eight is $10.

Gamemaster:That seems fine, but why are you buying markers from this table company?

Gamemaster:What do they know about markers?

Foral:This is specifically marketed at dinks that just have no concept of anything.

Gamemaster:Who?

Gamemaster:There's a crumb combat kit for $30.

Scrazzy:That's probably true.

Gamemaster:Which is a lint roller.

Gamemaster:It's a lint roller.

Gamemaster:It's a $30 lint roller is what it is.

Scrazzy:Is it made out of wood, though?

Scrazzy:Is the handle wood?

Gamemaster:No, it's plastic.

Scrazzy:What?

Foral:Do you want a DM screen?

Foral:The deluxe one is $600.

Foral:I guess they add some stuff.

Gamemaster:What makes it deluxe?

Gamemaster:It's just it's wood?

Scrazzy:Wait, wait, wait.

Foral:It's a three panel.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Foral:Two way dice tower.

Foral:Modular tower storage.

Gamemaster:What is a two-way dice tower?

Foral:Table tray.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Foral:Magnetic pushpins.

Scrazzy:What do you mean two-way dice?

Gamemaster:You put the dice in and then you can either make it roll out on one side of the thing or roll out onto the table so all the players can see the dice.

Scrazzy:What?

Scrazzy:That makes sense.

Scrazzy:It's not like they can go down and then also up.

Gamemaster:Which is neat.

Foral:Okay, it's actually kind of a cool screen.

Gamemaster:It is neat, but it's...

Foral:It's just too much money.

Gamemaster:The two-way dice tower itself is $210.

Gamemaster:And I'm looking at the image of it, and the exterior is probably made out of the, like, whatever the rare deforested wood that they have is, but the interior is very clearly laser-cut, like, cheap OSB.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:So...

Gamemaster:Like, that's very obviously laser-cut plywood.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Oh, they have lift kits for your tables.

Foral:And they start at two grand.

Gamemaster:The table doesn't start with being able to, like, lift it?

Gamemaster:Or, wait, sorry, is a lift kit, like, turn it into a standing desk?

Gamemaster:Is that what a lift kit is?

Ozzie:I'm actually not really sure what this means.

Scrazzy:You got to buy that separately.

Foral:I'm not sure what this does.

Foral:Oh, it's the thing that makes your table crank up and down.

Ozzie:Oh, the center?

Foral:No, like raise the lower part up and down, I think.

Ozzie:Right.

Gamemaster:But is it compatible with any table?

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Because it looks like you need a table where the center comes out to use it.

Foral:Yeah, well, it'll... Yeah, well, this... Yeah, and so those start at $12,000.

Gamemaster:It upgrades any modular gaming table with a hand-operated raise and lower system.

Gamemaster:So you already need a modular gaming table.

Scrazzy:Well, how expensive can those be?

Foral:Those start at $12,000, and then if you have an eight-person one, the lift kit's $4,300.

Scrazzy:Listen, if I spend enough time on this website, these are going to start seeming reasonable.

Scrazzy:You're going to see the $400 Ebony cup holders, and then you're going to see $30 fucking wooden cups and be like, that's actually not bad for a wooden cup.

Foral:Oh no.

Scrazzy:The cup holders themselves.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Gamemaster:Okay, so we're looking at the pleb side of their website anyway, because I've just noticed this little link called Custom Shop.

Gamemaster:where you can have them custom make your table.

Gamemaster:And I don't know how much it costs, but I do know that you have to put down a deposit of a grand just to start the process of designing the table.

Gamemaster:So I have to imagine it's more than the $40,000 gaming table that we were already looking at on their regular website.

Foral:That's insane.

Gamemaster:Because they're willing to say in public, this table costs $40,000.

Gamemaster:They're not willing to give a budget for the custom tables, which makes me think they're more.

Foral:That's crazy.

Scrazzy:They have a collaboration with the watchmaker Christopher Ward.

Gamemaster:In case you want a watch installed in your table.

Scrazzy:It is the most reasonably priced thing in the entire fucking website.

Gamemaster:What is the collaboration?

Scrazzy:If you go to Tabletop Gaming Gifts and Merch, it's just a Wormwood watch.

Scrazzy:It's just a Christopher Ward watch that says Wormwood on it with the Wormwood logo.

Gamemaster:Why would you... But... There are only five left in stock.

Foral:How much is it?

Scrazzy:$1,500.

Gamemaster:How many... How many do you think were made?

Gamemaster:Like, six?

Foral:Five.

Gamemaster:Five?

Gamemaster:I just... I guess... Yeah.

Scrazzy:I don't know.

Scrazzy:Whoever's spending $30,000 on a table is probably like, throw the watch in, too.

Scrazzy:I like watches.

Gamemaster:If you...

Gamemaster:If you have a 40 grand table from this company in your basement, you must, like, at some point develop a kind of Stockholm Syndrome of, now I have brand loyalty, I also want a watch that has the same company's name on it.

Scrazzy:It's the kind of thing that when you're in an argument with someone, it's like the Stockholm Syndrome that eats you away where you think you're better because you spent a bunch of money on a table.

Scrazzy:You're like, dude, you couldn't even fucking afford my table.

Scrazzy:The guy's like, what are you saying?

Foral:that's ridiculous I don't know man wild

Gamemaster:What is...

Scrazzy:And you're like, I can't believe this happened.

Gamemaster:What is oak leather?

Scrazzy:Is that bark?

Scrazzy:What are you talking about?

Gamemaster:I just... I'm looking at the interior.

Gamemaster:The interior of this watch says Italian vintage oak leather.

Gamemaster:Oh my god.

Gamemaster:It's 820.

Gamemaster:Do we want to play Pathfinder?

Foral:Let's go.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:I got super sidetracked by the table.

Scrazzy:Yeah.

Ozzie:Let's do it.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:God, what are we even doing?

Gamemaster:You have to give me half a second to remember what's happening.

Foral:So just for some context, Lieutenant Forrell's wife's murderer resurfaced and has since kidnapped his daughter and is holding her ransom.

Foral:But no one can help him with it because they don't really believe the killer resurfaced or they're bought off or something.

Foral:He's not sure, but he's got to do one last job.

Foral:Just one more and he's out.

Gamemaster:No.

Ozzie:And the killer sabotaged his respawn coffin.

Gamemaster:No.

Gamemaster:Incorrect.

Foral:Yes!

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Right, and Mike is his daughter who's been kidnapped.

Scrazzy:Josh is like, and then we'll flip over.

Gamemaster:So this entire session, Mike is just going to be off doing his own thing being kidnapped.

Foral:Mike gets into it and, like, stuffs a towel into his...

Gamemaster:Well, the...

Scrazzy:Mike, your character's tied up.

Scrazzy:Can you make an athletics check?

Ozzie:you

Scrazzy:And it's like a minus two.

Scrazzy:And I just roll.

Gamemaster:No, by the way.

Scrazzy:And it's not enough to break free of these steel chains.

Scrazzy:All right.

Scrazzy:and then it's just like back to the other story

Gamemaster:That is not happening.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:This...

Foral:This is another last job.

Gamemaster:Okay, so actually, stepping back a little bit, for consistency's sake, would it make more sense for your characters if this happened before the other one-shot?

Gamemaster:Just so that we can say that that other one-shot is that last job.

Ozzie:No, this is another job.

Gamemaster:This is a second last job!

Scrazzy:It has to be.

Ozzie:He thought he was out and then he got pulled back in.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Foral:Well, it's actually his third last job, so it's fine.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Foral:Yeah, it's fine.

Gamemaster:Nick Fury showed up at your house and said, I need you for one last, one last job.

Scrazzy:John Wick 3.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Okay, fine.

Gamemaster:So then this one shot will take place like maybe a month or so after the previous one.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:You are currently in the... I don't know.

Gamemaster:Hold is probably the wrong term.

Gamemaster:you're on a very large, uh, slip ship right now, which we'll get into in a moment.

Gamemaster:Um, but you are in a kind of mess hall slash gathering hall, uh, dual use space, uh, along with around 15,000 other people, um, all from Sedecium.

Gamemaster:As you look around, I would love it if we could just get a quick refresher from everybody on who you are and what you look like.

Foral:Thank you.

Ozzie:Ozzie is a bulky orc with just covered in all kinds of different scars, you know, cuts, burns, the like, just heavily armed and armored.

Foral:You have

Scrazzy:Old Man Strazzy is a 70-year-old human, long white beard, bald head, long-ish white hair, like a halo-ish.

Scrazzy:And Bob

Foral:OK.

Scrazzy:Bob looks like undead Vincent D'Onofrio.

Scrazzy:If that means anything.

Gamemaster:Is he the same size?

Gamemaster:Like he's full Kingpin sized?

Scrazzy:Well, no.

Ozzie:He's just a head.

Ozzie:Isn't he just a head now?

Scrazzy:He's just a head.

Gamemaster:Oh, right.

Gamemaster:He's just a head.

Gamemaster:I forgot.

Gamemaster:Oh my god.

Gamemaster:I totally forgot he's just the head.

Gamemaster:So he's just Kingpin's head floating around.

Scrazzy:Pretty much, yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Great.

Foral:And then the camera pans to the right and then has to go down quite a bit to see a three-foot goblin with a four-and-a-half-foot-long gun who's grumpily smoking a cigar and going, It's my last job, boys.

Foral:One more job and I'm out.

Foral:Just gotta save my daughter.

Ozzie:Can't believe they got you back in for this one, Lieutenant.

Foral:Can't believe it either.

Foral:It's only been my third last job.

Gamemaster:You're all crammed into this general space.

Gamemaster:Just a short hour and a half ago or so, you were all at various parts of the outpost, the forward operating base that Sedecium has in this part of the Astra.

Gamemaster:You had returned from your mission to the Everdawn, reported back to your superiors about what info you found.

Gamemaster:And

Gamemaster:long since sent the eggheads and the scientists to start digging through that particular space station and see what other info that they can extract.

Gamemaster:You were taking either a well-earned break or perhaps a well-deserved retirement on the station before maybe you get shipped back to New Volcantum if you end up retiring surface side.

Foral:Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:But you are interrupted in your rest or your retirement musings by a loud klaxon that rings throughout the forward base and an announcement requesting every able-bodied person on the station to report to Dock 1.

Gamemaster:Of course, it sounds like that includes people who are retired.

Gamemaster:This is an all-hands-on-deck situation.

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, the announcement doesn't carry a lot of info about why there's been a request for everybody on the station effectively to muster at this one point, but you would all know that Dock 1 is...

Scrazzy:you

Gamemaster:Usually unused.

Gamemaster:That was the dock that held the towing equipment for the massive ship that brought this forward base to this part of the Astrid in the first place.

Foral:Thank you.

Gamemaster:It's not really designed for everyday use.

Gamemaster:And so being mustered to this particular dock means a very large ship is docking with the base.

Gamemaster:And sure enough, as you all get to the point that murmurs from everybody on the station, all told, maybe 17-ish thousand people in this forward base that mustered within the hour or so that you had before the ship landed, were present to see this dock.

Gamemaster:massive, not Sedecium ship.

Foral:India.

Gamemaster:It doesn't carry the same general architecture.

Gamemaster:Instead, it actually follows, Sedecium tends to follow the trends of what its founders liked.

Gamemaster:it architecturally and so there's there's a lot of uh uh art deco uh uh hard angles gold geometric patterns and the like uh as motifs throughout a lot of the construction used uh honestly some sedition ships if you look at them almost look like skyscrapers that have been turned on their side uh there's a strong architectural style there and this ship doesn't fit it

Foral:All right.

Gamemaster:This ship is also substantially larger than the ships that Sedecium usually makes.

Gamemaster:Sedecium, for the most part, is a relatively small player in the Astra, so they try to move without attracting a lot of attention, and a lot of their slipships are built for that reason.

Gamemaster:They are small, they are relatively difficult to detect as they move throughout the Astra, and they're designed for specific purposes.

Gamemaster:This ship is maybe 15 miles across.

Gamemaster:It's difficult to get perspective there, but it is orders of magnitude larger than the operating base that you're currently in.

Foral:Damn.

Gamemaster:You are in the space station designed to hold thousands of people, and that ship looks like it could easily hold a whole city on the interior.

Gamemaster:It is...

Gamemaster:crescent moon-shaped.

Gamemaster:It looks like a crescent moon where it gets thicker in the middle, with the only interesting defining feature there is there are these gossamer cords from the two points of the moon towards a center point in the middle of the moon where the engine is.

Gamemaster:And it is, from your angle, a captive sun, just a small star that has been kept.

Foral:Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:Somehow, gravitationally, within this ship to be used as its propulsion.

Gamemaster:Can I get, as this ship docks, I guess a society or a crafting check here to see if any of you are familiar with this particular ship?

Gamemaster:You know at the very least from the reactions of people around you that it isn't hostile.

Gamemaster:But it is newsworthy that it's being docked here.

Scrazzy:32 for crafting.

Foral:Society or what?

Gamemaster:Crafting.

Foral:Alright, I got... Which is society, Tana?

Gamemaster:As like a kind of do we know what this is kind of thing.

Ozzie:Holy.

Ozzie:Zero.

Foral:Okay.

Foral:22 for society.

Gamemaster:22.

Gamemaster:Okay, so we'll do two different things.

Gamemaster:You rolled crafting, right, Skrazy?

Gamemaster:Okay, from the crafting check, I will say looking at the ship, there is one thing that is immediately obvious from the construction of the ship.

Gamemaster:This is a warship.

Gamemaster:At various parts of the ship, there are a number of embankments where you can see very, very large barrels of railguns and laser weapons and perhaps some more exotic arcane-powered weaponry.

Gamemaster:Things that the Sedecium normally doesn't build for, because for the most part, the Sedecium isn't at War with other mortals, so there isn't much need for warships.

Foral:Mm hmm.

Gamemaster:This ship is built for War, and it is also something you've heard of.

Gamemaster:But as you're trying to put together where am I familiar with this, with the 22 on the society, you would know that this is...

Gamemaster:This is a warship that was excavated after a lead following this weird absence in some data a few years ago brought you to an old, hidden, third sundom...

Gamemaster:like, weapons platform, effectively.

Gamemaster:A space station that had quite a few Sundom weapons on it.

Gamemaster:This is a Sundom warship.

Gamemaster:This is the SDV Heavy Hand of God.

Foral:Thank you.

Gamemaster:And it is used, as best they can tell...

Gamemaster:for obliterating planets.

Gamemaster:It has enough firepower on it to destroy an entire crystal sphere and everything inside of it.

Gamemaster:As far as they're aware, the Sundom never actually deployed it.

Gamemaster:It was built for War with the Thessians, the same as what the Sedecium would use it for, but the Sundom fell before they could even actually use it in combat.

Gamemaster:Not ones to give up such amazing weaponry.

Gamemaster:The Sedecium, having located it, took it back to New Volcantum, effectively stripped the whole thing to figure out how every individual piece works, and then put it back together so that they could use it as a warship if need be.

Foral:I don't know.

Gamemaster:The fact that perhaps the most powerful vehicle owned by a multi-crystal sphere government is now present at your little forward base that's supposed to be a secret and not attracting much attention to itself is not a generally good sign.

Gamemaster:This is exacerbated by the fact that as it docks, there is another command, once again another klaxon signaling that a command is coming, and then the command that says, we request that all able-bodied people ready for combat and board the ship for transport.

Gamemaster:More information will be relayed to you en route.

Gamemaster:And as it docks a...

Gamemaster:The exterior of the ship is this very smooth metal.

Gamemaster:There aren't any noticeable doors, and you watch as the metal itself almost liquefies and parts to reveal a way in.

Scrazzy:you

Gamemaster:Everybody is ushered in, including you, as well as effectively everybody you know on the station.

Gamemaster:There aren't many people on this, like, outside of Sedecium territory forward operating base that aren't considered...

Gamemaster:able and ready to partake in military action.

Gamemaster:So this is effectively emptying out this particular station.

Gamemaster:You board in, you're ushered into where we started this one shot, this like weird general area mess hall.

Gamemaster:This room itself is perhaps, it's definitely larger than any room that you had been in in your operating base.

Gamemaster:It holds nearly the entire population there.

Gamemaster:There is a very, very small nudge that you gather is the ship.

Gamemaster:undocking and entering its forward motion towards whatever its destination is.

Gamemaster:Murmurs throughout the crowd as people figure out what the hell is going on.

Gamemaster:But once the ship is underway, you hear and then see a soft, like, bluish-tealish floating orb that you would understand to be a cave make its way up towards the front in this kind of impromptu stage area that they've made.

Gamemaster:Its voice, as it speaks out, is projected across all of you.

Gamemaster:And it says, hello, for those of you who haven't met me yet, I am TuRiin.

Gamemaster:I am the handler for a good majority of you.

Gamemaster:And I will be taking the position of vice captain of this ship for the time being.

Gamemaster:I acknowledge that we're...

Gamemaster:We're very rushed right now, but unfortunately, we were the only ones in the area that are able to respond to a particularly interesting but dangerous event.

Scrazzy:Thanks.

Gamemaster:There is a flicker and there's no projector screen, but an image is projected as like a 2D flat image next to this cave so that everybody can see.

Gamemaster:You see projected onto the screen, there is a planetoid.

Gamemaster:Once again, in space, hard to get a sense of Scale here, but it is obviously a relatively large celestial body.

Gamemaster:Bluish-grayish in color.

Gamemaster:There are no...

Gamemaster:immediately discernible oceans.

Gamemaster:It almost seems like it's entirely some form of land.

Gamemaster:But as you trace your way around it, you see that it isn't a perfect sphere.

Gamemaster:There are two noticeable differences in it from what a regular planetoid would be.

Gamemaster:One is that it almost curls in on itself at one end.

Foral:you

Gamemaster:Like there's either a huge fissure that's been cut through one bit of this planetoid or some kind of geological formation would occur that causes it.

Gamemaster:Instead of it being a perfect sphere, it just curls inward at one point.

Gamemaster:And opposite that, there is a massive yellow cloud that looks like it's extending off.

Gamemaster:of the uh planetoid in some form but also wrapped around maybe half of the surface area of the planet um as that displays uh the the the cave TuRiin says uh this planetoid is the thessian tithe uh as of two and a half

Gamemaster:standard hours ago, it was killed by the God Eater Harrow, who is in the process of devouring it.

Foral:Oh.

Gamemaster:It happens to be within reach of this particular forward operating station.

Gamemaster:And we would like to take advantage of the death of tithe and perhaps steal some of its divine essence before it gets consumed, both to prevent Harrow from growing in power as it is rapidly exceeding any projection we have.

Gamemaster:for taking it down, as well as for our own use.

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, we project that the harrow will consume tithe within maybe from this point forward another hour or so.

Foral:you

Gamemaster:As such, we needed everybody on deck to immediately make our way over.

Gamemaster:I understand that many of you are perhaps concerned about moving towards the recent corpse of a Thessian.

Gamemaster:I can assure you, you are all being paid a time and a half for this.

Gamemaster:And of course, we do have backups of yours stored with your loved ones on the station.

Gamemaster:Sorry, did you raise your hand?

Gamemaster:Oh, you're smoking.

Foral:Cool.

Scrazzy:Oh, here we go.

Gamemaster:Okay, okay, okay.

Foral:Thank you.

Gamemaster:There are some complications with us making it onto the surface of Tithe.

Gamemaster:Tithe was worshipped by a number of relatively advanced civilizations that both lived on and around it.

Gamemaster:And there are multiple systems in place that prevent...

Gamemaster:entry, so to speak, landing on the tithe planet.

Gamemaster:This ship is not powerful enough to break through those, unfortunately.

Gamemaster:Of course, Harrow has, but we would like to stay away from Harrow and its brood as much as possible.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:So we will be approaching from the opposite side of the planetoid.

Gamemaster:We will need fire teams of three to get past the barrier and land on the surface to set up beacons we can use to move larger teams onto the planet and start the extraction process.

Gamemaster:So we have, and you see that some people who look like they were part of the administration of the base that seem to be a bit more up-to-date with what's happening start moving through the crowd and picking out groups of three.

Gamemaster:One of them does come up to you and hands each of you a little ticket of some kind.

Gamemaster:The cave continues.

Gamemaster:Since the barrier is strong enough that we cannot pierce it with this weaponry, we are going to ask that those fire teams make their way through the slip.

Gamemaster:to get to the base of the planet and then re-enter real space.

Scrazzy:you you

Gamemaster:I understand this is particularly dangerous.

Gamemaster:We do have the advantage of some Sundom technology, which should increase the protection you have in the slip long enough to make the journey, although not by much, so I would suggest that you all hurry.

Foral:you you

Gamemaster:And we will outfit all of you with a cognitive beacon that you can use to do the link should you successfully make it to the other side.

Gamemaster:I understand this is all very chaotic.

Gamemaster:We are really doing our best with what we can, but this is an opportunity that we really cannot let go of.

Gamemaster:Um, so, uh, those of you that have been selected for the fire teams, uh, you've been tickets, uh, you've been given tickets that you can claim, uh, down in the armory, um, for, for the requisite protective gear.

Gamemaster:Uh, and then you can come back and we'll give you specific briefings.

Gamemaster:Uh, the rest of you, you will be manning the weapon stations because the Harrow will attack the ship and we need to hold them off long enough, uh, for the OA teams to land.

Gamemaster:And then there's a commotion as there's a break and people are let to go to the various areas and start planning for what is expected to be a very quick and dangerous landing in the orbit around the tithe planet, the corpse of this Thessian.

Foral:I raise my hand.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Foral:I'll lead one of the fire teams.

Gamemaster:An administrator has already given the three of you tickets that show that you're part of a fire team because you've worked together in the past.

Gamemaster:And they'll say, it's up to you who leads this fire team if you need a leader.

Gamemaster:But the three of you should go to the armory and pick up your protective gear.

Gamemaster:And then they move on to another group to select it.

Foral:Get ready, maggots.

Foral:We're about to be deployed.

Foral:By the way, Josh, I've changed my rune from crushing.

Scrazzy:Again.

Ozzie:Let's go get our supplies.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Oh, right.

Foral:And I'm going to put on leather armor, and then I will also refund the bullets I spent, if that's all right.

Gamemaster:Because that was illegal.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:What is it if not crushing?

Foral:Yeah, no, I switched it.

Gamemaster:Oh, you already switched around.

Gamemaster:You already did the stuff.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:I don't have to update anything.

Foral:I switched it for you.

Gamemaster:Great.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay, sure.

Gamemaster:So you are, as everybody breaks and moves to different stations to get a bit more information about what they'll actually be doing, you guys are ushered along with a number of other groups.

Gamemaster:It looks like part of the strategy is throwing a lot of teams at the problem and hoping at least a handful of them succeed.

Gamemaster:So you are sent over to the armory along with these other groups where there is a very harried-looking person who's trying to just figure out the layout of this place so that they can actually get everybody the equipment they need, who, once you get there, comes out and gives each of you...

Gamemaster:It looks kind of like a wristwatch, almost.

Gamemaster:It's this flattened crystal orb, almost, on a band of some kind that each of you have.

Gamemaster:And they say, okay, so this is much better than the equipment we normally give people for excursions into the slip.

Foral:Thank you.

Gamemaster:This should protect you from...

Gamemaster:from coherence loss for at least 30 minutes.

Gamemaster:I wouldn't push it much further than that, but you do get some small exposure to the slip and you're fine.

Ozzie:It's timeless.

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, we can't get you anything better than that because that would be bulky and we are afraid of attracting the attention of those that live in the slip, which...

Gamemaster:seems like it's a relatively fine trade-off to just ask you to have some speed.

Gamemaster:So you wear that, you hit the button, it'll wrap around you, it'll do its whole thing.

Gamemaster:These are artifacts, so we ask that you not lose them, if at all possible.

Gamemaster:But I understand things get lost.

Gamemaster:Once you've acquainted, once you've attuned to this, we ask that you move your way down over to the, and then he gives you directions to another area of the ship, where they'll plot out a direction that you can take as you navigate your way down.

Gamemaster:You're given the items, you're pushed along.

Gamemaster:Everybody is very harried right now.

Gamemaster:You don't know at what point the information that this happened was told to your particular base's command, but it can't have been much earlier than this ship just showing up and docking and grabbing everybody on board.

Gamemaster:You're pushed along.

Gamemaster:The next area you go to requires taking a series of elevators.

Gamemaster:I don't think any of you would have been on a station long enough where you have to take a connection for an elevator, but you have to do that twice here to get to different parts of the ship.

Foral:Thank you.

Gamemaster:But for a little map readout shows that you have made it to... For this Crescent Moon, you're at almost the bottom-most part of it, if...

Scrazzy:you

Gamemaster:like going off of gravity pointing in a particular direction where you've collected with another with a number of other teams similarly wearing the wristbands that you guys got and a kind of like

Gamemaster:a more general depiction of the sphere, the planetoid type that you're trying to get to, as well as a depiction of a few miles above the surface, the actual barrier.

Gamemaster:TuRiin is here too.

Gamemaster:And as people file in, says, okay, great.

Gamemaster:So all of you are going to have to take different paths through the slip because we don't want to pile too many people into the same area.

Gamemaster:Same reason you're not getting as much protection.

Gamemaster:Too many people entering the slip in a particular area at the same time is likely to attract the kind of attention we don't want.

Gamemaster:So I'm going to ask that each of you picks a different trajectory effectively to make your way through.

Gamemaster:But regardless of your trajectory, the plan here is relatively simple.

Gamemaster:We're putting you in individual EVA suits.

Gamemaster:You'll be sent at relatively high velocity towards the barrier.

Gamemaster:You'll have to choose a point before you hit the barrier to translate into the slip.

Gamemaster:If you do it too early, that will increase the amount of time you spend in the slip, which could result in death, but at the very least will add more difficulties as you proceed through.

Gamemaster:And if you wait too late, you might hit the barrier and be immediately vaporized.

Gamemaster:So there's a kind of balance you'll have to hit there.

Gamemaster:Once you translate into the slip, you'll have to deal with whatever's on the other side.

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, that's a complete grab bag.

Gamemaster:We have no way of knowing what's in the slip at any point.

Gamemaster:And so we'll just have to hope that your excellent training and intuition gets you through it.

Gamemaster:you'll need to pass towards the other side of the barrier and then figure out some way to translate back.

Gamemaster:There is a very high likelihood that you won't just be able to click a button and switch back, so you'll need to find a portal of some kind that brings you out of the slap, slip back into real space.

Gamemaster:Those are naturally occurring.

Gamemaster:We know that's a phenomena that happens, so it's more likely you'll be able to find one.

Gamemaster:Just something you'll have to keep Anaïs out for once you make the journey.

Gamemaster:Once you've slipped back into real space, you'll want to avoid any of the inhabitants of Tithe, as well as any of the Harrow's Brood, which are actively consuming the planet and everything on it.

Gamemaster:And then plant a cognitive beacon, which we are handing out now.

Gamemaster:Once you've lit it, we'll be able to bring you back onto the ship safely.

Gamemaster:Sound good?

Foral:Mm hmm.

Scrazzy:Easy peasy.

Gamemaster:Right?

Gamemaster:All right.

Gamemaster:And then they start like breaking you up into individual things, handing out the cognitive beacons, which are, you guys have seen them in multiple campaigns at this point.

Gamemaster:They are like a metal stake with a kind of brazier on it.

Gamemaster:As it turns out, you know, as many centuries pass as technology improves, there's no need to like...

Gamemaster:Switch that up.

Gamemaster:It works great.

Gamemaster:So you get yourselves like a little unfolding stake to drive into the ground and light.

Gamemaster:And you are also given your EVA suits, which is this kind of exosuit type thing that clips onto your back that has a number of jets in it that you can control.

Gamemaster:Not quite with your mind.

Gamemaster:You do have to move some physical things, but it's extremely exaggerated.

Gamemaster:Like you twist your hand forward a little bit and you can feel the jet trying to rotate you a ton.

Gamemaster:And you will need to use that to proceed towards the barrier itself.

Gamemaster:As that happens, as they get you all suited up, a kind of shutter opens on a window so that you can see what the planet itself looks like from here.

Gamemaster:Instead of looking at the image now, you can see now that the cloud, that yellow cloud that you had seen, is actually trillions upon trillions upon trillions of...

Gamemaster:something, you can't quite tell what at this distance, swarming around the other part of the planet, the side furthest away from where you are.

Gamemaster:The ship is still approaching.

Gamemaster:It hasn't actually reached its destination yet, but you can see that as you start to get closer, bits of that cloud have split off and seem to be heading in your direction.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:and just as you notice that that is happening, there is this deafening shake, and you see a massive beam of purple light shoot off of your ship towards the cloud.

Gamemaster:As it appears, combat has begun, as they are holding off the advance of Harrow long enough for all of you to possibly make it to the floor, to the planet's surface.

Gamemaster:And that is also the cave signal to get all of you into your drop pods, effectively, the spot where you'll be launched out of the ship towards the barrier.

Gamemaster:Before you guys get loaded in, is there anything you'd like to do or say before you start in?

Gamemaster:You'll know that you'll have comms specifically with each other as you descend towards the barrier, but maybe game plans or looking around for getting some idea of what you're getting into might be a good idea.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Foral:So one thing to note, I actually don't have enough money for a demolishing rune.

Foral:So I got a golden silencer and Lieutenant Floro is going to start giving a doomsday speech.

Foral:All right, boys, we got one chance to strike it and then we can cut.

Scrazzy:Well, as far as game playing, what do we... So, we're all...

Gamemaster:Okay.

Foral:So is it a dex to flick the last minute?

Foral:Go there, or what is it?

Gamemaster:So I'm going to default to making it a reflex check.

Foral:Oh, I assumed it was one person doing it for the whole group.

Gamemaster:If you can justify to me a different skill to use for your navigation, I will allow it.

Gamemaster:But we're defaulting to it's a reflex save to try and maneuver it.

Gamemaster:I will also say the three of you are dropping in the same direction.

Gamemaster:You're not actually physically linked, but you are with each other.

Gamemaster:So you can help each other in some form if necessary in this descent.

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:No, no, no, no.

Gamemaster:All three of you are in your own... Like, you're not in anything.

Gamemaster:You're just on your own individual with this exosuit being launched at it.

Foral:Okay.

Ozzie:Cheers.

Gamemaster:They didn't want to put you in a vehicle because the concern there is anything... Well, three people die at once.

Foral:Three people die at once.

Gamemaster:And also, the more stuff you bring with you, the louder you are in the slip, and the more likely it is that you attract the attention of what lives on that side, which is not what you want to do.

Scrazzy:How long are we expected to be in this slip?

Foral:So.

Gamemaster:Assuming everything goes to plan, ideally under 10 minutes.

Scrazzy:Okay.

Gamemaster:If everything doesn't go to plan, you have 30 minutes of air, so to speak, on your ships.

Gamemaster:On your bracelets.

Gamemaster:The ideal world is before you hit the barrier, you switch into the slip, you immediately find a portal, and then you take that to swap back into real space on the other side of the barrier.

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:There are a lot of things that could go wrong in that plan, but this is not their best strategy.

Gamemaster:This is their just, we need to throw things at the wall really quickly strategy.

Gamemaster:Because you can see, even as you've emerged and have started combat with this worm, there is a considerable portion of the planet that's fully not there anymore.

Gamemaster:that's been consumed by that yellow swarm that is the harrow.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:All right, boss.

Scrazzy:OK.

Ozzie:I guess so.

Ozzie:I'm not sure how good of a job I'm going to do navigating this transition, but we'll see how it goes.

Foral:Good luck.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Foral:And listen to me when I say to press the button.

Ozzie:Fair enough.

Foral:Yeah.

Scrazzy:Sure.

Foral:I'm assuming you have the best decks, which is why I'm saying that.

Gamemaster:Actually, out of curiosity, you're an expert in reflex saves, right?

Scrazzy:Very assumptive.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I think I would allow follow the expert here.

Gamemaster:I think it specifically calls out skill checks, but I will allow this particular check as well, if need be.

Gamemaster:Regardless, the three of you are set up over in one area of this particular staging room where you're placed on this... It's almost like a mattress, but it's made entirely out of this green gel.

Foral:All right.

Gamemaster:And also it's vertical, where you just kind of put your back against it as you're standing up.

Gamemaster:There is a second where you hear a snap.

Gamemaster:And then there's a moment where nothing happens.

Gamemaster:And then you are launched violently forward just at the wall, which in a split second melts open to allow your passage.

Gamemaster:Have any of you been on one of those roller coasters that start from zero and just launch forward?

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:It's like that, but multiplied by multiple orders of magnitude as you're just forced forward at high speed towards the planet.

Gamemaster:You are effectively being launched as a missile.

Gamemaster:The three of you launch forward.

Gamemaster:I would love an immediate fortitude save from all of you just to see how quickly you get your bearings from that inertia shift as you're pushed forward.

Scrazzy:Does Bob have to roll these?

Gamemaster:Uh, Bob doesn't.

Gamemaster:We're gonna say for the sake of this, Bob is just, like, hitched onto you and is just coming along for the ride.

Ozzie:I got a 16.

Scrazzy:What the fuck?

Gamemaster:What did we get?

Foral:I got a 19.

Gamemaster:Ouch.

Scrazzy:I got a 14.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Excuse me.

Gamemaster:This is a new experience for all of you.

Gamemaster:It's a new experience, and also they didn't warn you that this was going to be the method of delivery.

Gamemaster:So you are all unfortunately a little groggy and out of it as the blood gets pushed to the back of your skull for a second as you're launched forward.

Gamemaster:You're all in varying states of...

Gamemaster:blacking out for a second and then the sight comes back because you need to like you need some way to force the blood into your eyeballs to actually be able to see anything and so you're getting this intermittent spots uh and pressure as you're pushed forward uh luckily none of you critically failed so none of you

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:in your uh like knocked out state accidentally changed the direction of your launch uh with with the thing so you are all proceeding in the same direction but none of you unfortunately have the opportunity to make perception checks uh as you are hurdled into um

Gamemaster:A debris field that's just floating in space between where you are and where the planet itself is.

Gamemaster:So you are launched at high velocity as these rocks whiz by.

Gamemaster:Without that initial perception check, you unfortunately don't have a lot of time to prepare here.

Gamemaster:You are given... You have three actions as you see that you are coming up to one of these larger rocks that seems to be in your path.

Foral:Well, I would like to shoot it!

Gamemaster:Is there anything you think you can do?

Gamemaster:as this rock comes to either maneuver out of the way or get the rock out of the way or something along those lines.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:If nothing else, you can always just brace for impact.

Gamemaster:But this rock is directly in the line of sight of all of you and you have one round to do something about it if you so choose.

Gamemaster:Okay, you're just fully shooting through space, taking out your gun and shooting it at this asteroid.

Foral:Yes.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:Roll an attack roll here.

Foral:OK, OK, OK.

Gamemaster:While you're doing that, the other two of you, do you have anything you'd like to do at the same time as this?

Scrazzy:How much bulk is this asteroid?

Ozzie:Can I... Probably stupid.

Scrazzy:27.

Gamemaster:I will let you make a nature check to see if you can figure out what the bulk of this asteroid is.

Gamemaster:What'd you get?

Gamemaster:A 27.

Gamemaster:A 27's a pretty good roll.

Gamemaster:I mean, you're looking at a rock, and you're trying to figure out how heavy the rock is.

Foral:Oh, I didn't mean to use that ammunition.

Foral:But yeah.

Gamemaster:I think you would guess if the rock is mostly not very dense, you would guess around 10 bulk.

Gamemaster:If the rock is very dense and filled with metal, maybe 100 bulk.

Scrazzy:Understandable.

Ozzie:Josh, are you in Foundry at the moment?

Gamemaster:I am.

Ozzie:Okay, so I'm wearing a lifting belt, and it has an ability.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Ozzie:It only works technically for objects up to 8 bulk, but can I just use this activation to just give myself a burst of extra strength so that I can just absorb some impact?

Gamemaster:Okay, so you're trying to effectively turn on the assisted lift feature of this belt to turn yourself into a battering ram?

Foral:Okay.

Ozzie:Yeah, I guess.

Gamemaster:Are you just trying to absorb the damage?

Scrazzy:If I see him doing that, my question wasn't dumb.

Gamemaster:Like, what is the end result that you're going for?

Ozzie:Yeah, I'm hoping to just give myself a little extra protection with this burst of strength.

Gamemaster:Okay, I would definitely allow that.

Gamemaster:I mean, you have a belt specifically designed for moving things, and this is a big floating rock, so I would allow it.

Scrazzy:about the bulk of the rock.

Scrazzy:I have also an ability that allows me to manipulate something of up to eight bulk.

Scrazzy:So if together we do something, and this happens to be 16 bulk...

Gamemaster:Okay.

Foral:Perhaps my shot carves it up so that it's smaller than 8 bulk if it wasn't.

Ozzie:Perfect.

Ozzie:It breaks it right in half.

Gamemaster:What did you get for the attack?

Foral:I got a 33.

Gamemaster:Okay, that's a crit.

Gamemaster:Roll damage.

Ozzie:Mike, for the record, I was going to say that the amount of bulk was just going to be stupid big.

Foral:Okay.

Ozzie:I was not calling whatever action you were going to call stupid.

Gamemaster:Hmm.

Scrazzy:No, no, no, because Josh was like, it wasn't like I was going to mage hand it out of the way.

Scrazzy:I have something that works on up to eight bulk.

Gamemaster:What are you trying to do that works on up to eight bulk?

Gamemaster:With 44 points of damage, there is an explosive burst as the bullet hits the rock, and you are lucky.

Gamemaster:This particular asteroid appears to be relatively, shoot, buoyant?

Gamemaster:No.

Gamemaster:What's the opposite of dense?

Gamemaster:Sparse?

Gamemaster:It doesn't have any heavy metals or anything like that in it.

Gamemaster:It's like regolith that is relatively filled with pockets of vacuum.

Gamemaster:And so that shot with 44 points of damage is enough to kind of crack it.

Foral:Thank you.

Gamemaster:So now instead of one big asteroid in front of you, there are two medium-sized asteroids right next to each other in front of you.

Gamemaster:Oh gosh, grasping vine.

Scrazzy:It comes out of Bob's mouth.

Gamemaster:From the ground beneath you and stretches to the target.

Gamemaster:Obviously there's no ground here, but let's see if the rest of it is fine.

Gamemaster:One attended object.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:I would like... I want two things here.

Gamemaster:I want Scrazzy to make a... Make a magic attack roll.

Gamemaster:And Ozzie, can you make an athletics check, please?

Gamemaster:21.

Ozzie:Dang, man.

Ozzie:Come on.

Ozzie:21.

Scrazzy:We're going to die before we get there.

Gamemaster:And then a 17.

Gamemaster:Ouch.

Ozzie:The two rolls that I have made so far this session were my two highest modifier things of my whole character.

Gamemaster:Oh, I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:It happens.

Gamemaster:21 and a 17.

Gamemaster:Actually, let me just double check something.

Gamemaster:I think those are both failures.

Gamemaster:But... Yes, they are both failures.

Gamemaster:Okay, so, lifting belt activated.

Gamemaster:Like, arm in front, trying to come up with a way to kind of brace for impact here.

Gamemaster:As well as Bob opens his mouth and this burst of vines propels forward.

Gamemaster:Honestly, slowing Scrazzy just a little bit as he shoots these vines forward.

Gamemaster:to grab the other bit of the asteroid and kind of push it out of the way in some form.

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, you're all just moving way too fast.

Gamemaster:It seems you just can't get it off in time to actually move it all that much.

Gamemaster:You feel that you might have dampened the damage a little bit, but the three of you are still going to make contact with this asteroid.

Foral:Can I... I still have one action.

Gamemaster:There is a...

Foral:Can I draw my pistol and try to shoot another one?

Gamemaster:Can you draw your pistol and then shoot?

Gamemaster:That's two actions, right?

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Unless you have like a quick release sling of some kind.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Okay, so actually, when we land, not for this, can I swap out my blast lock for the quick reload?

Foral:Because I have the thieves to again.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Foral:I don't have to do this now.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you can't do it in flight, unfortunately.

Foral:Can I use the... No, I don't.

Foral:Can I use my nimble jot or hit the dirt to try to avoid it from me?

Foral:Either one of those?

Gamemaster:One second.

Foral:I'll put all of the different reactions I have.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Hit the dirt.

Gamemaster:Let's see.

Gamemaster:Oh, just all of the reactions you have.

Gamemaster:Goblin scuttle doesn't apply here, unfortunately.

Foral:Damn it.

Gamemaster:As funny as it would be for a goblin to scuttle in space.

Gamemaster:I will allow nimble dodge to help here.

Foral:Thank you.

Gamemaster:So with Nimble Dodge, you'll have a plus two circumstance bonus here to your AC.

Gamemaster:And then for the vine and the lifting belt, you both have a plus one circumstance bonus to your AC here.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I guess we'll do AC.

Gamemaster:I mean, it's really you hitting the rock and not the rock hitting you, and you are hitting it.

Gamemaster:But we're going to do AC as...

Gamemaster:Yeah, let's be weird about this.

Gamemaster:Take your AC, plus whatever the circumstance bonus is, subtract 10, and then roll a d20 with that result.

Gamemaster:This is an AC save.

Foral:OK.

Foral:So D20 plus 10 minus year.

Gamemaster:d20 plus your AC minus 10.

Foral:OK.

Ozzie:Oh, I just clicked the D20.

Ozzie:Darn it.

Ozzie:All right, what did I get?

Ozzie:7 plus 18 is 25.

Foral:That's not Argyle, but.

Scrazzy:Jesus Christ.

Scrazzy:28.

Gamemaster:Okay, a 25, a 22, and then a 28?

Gamemaster:Hot damn, you all succeed!

Gamemaster:Excuse me for a second, it just occurred to me that you are the wrong characters, so let me fix that.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Uh...

Gamemaster:you all succeed, so you're going to take half damage as you slam through this asteroid and continue forward.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you're only going to take six points of damage.

Gamemaster:I rolled low, and you all saved.

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:Six points of damage as you slam into this asteroid, but more importantly, I need reflex saves to see if hitting this asteroid deflects you guys from your original path.

Ozzie:Josh, does my resistance to physical damage, uh, apply?

Gamemaster:Yeah, no, this is absolutely physical damage.

Gamemaster:It's bludgeoning damage.

Ozzie:Alright.

Gamemaster:It's... Nice.

Ozzie:I will take two points of damage.

Ozzie:And now, what am I, a reflex save?

Gamemaster:reflex save.

Ozzie:Is that what you said?

Ozzie:Uh-oh.

Gamemaster:Miraculously, you all regular succeeded.

Ozzie:Alright.

Gamemaster:If you had in any form deviated in the kind of results that you got, you would have started moving apart.

Gamemaster:But since you all got the same band of success...

Gamemaster:You all proceed forward at the same angle that you get deflected by and continue forward as a group.

Foral:And then we start.

Foral:We put our arms back.

Foral:We start diving.

Foral:I reload.

Gamemaster:Sure, absolutely.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:You are now in the gravity well of Tithe.

Gamemaster:So you are, besides the initial acceleration that you had from your launch, is now being supplemented by Tithe's gravitational force pulling you in.

Gamemaster:You have time to reload if you need to do any of that kind of stuff, but I would also appreciate a perception check from whoever would like to, or up to two people, to see if there's anything else in your way.

Scrazzy:Perceivers, are you both perceivers?

Foral:I'll roll one.

Scrazzy:Oh.

Gamemaster:Oh, nice shot.

Scrazzy:Nice shot.

Gamemaster:Okay, 32 crit is good enough.

Gamemaster:You are hurtling towards the planet.

Gamemaster:At the path that you're currently taking, you look around and you can see that, unfortunately, of the, you'd guess, like, 30 or so teams that were sent out, you already see, like, explosions in the distance of some teams that perhaps have not been as lucky as you are making the descent down to this point.

Foral:As we're... Yeah, go ahead.

Gamemaster:But there's still a... Sorry.

Gamemaster:There you go.

Foral:We're sounding formations.

Foral:We're like, Omega Formation!

Foral:And we're all like, gliding and then... Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Scrazzy:Does Bob need air to breathe?

Gamemaster:You guys are well-coordinated.

Gamemaster:You don't need air to breathe right now.

Gamemaster:The three of you, as part of the general suit that you're using from Sedecium, you have oxygen supplied to you.

Gamemaster:So you're fine.

Gamemaster:Also, I feel like Bob, as a disembodied head, probably doesn't need to breathe anyway.

Scrazzy:That's what I'm saying.

Scrazzy:I guess Bob's in the suit, though.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:As you descend forward with the Crypt Perception check, you can see...

Scrazzy:Uncomfortable.

Gamemaster:You catch it far enough away.

Gamemaster:It seems that some of the Harrow's Brood, some of that big cloud, has made its way in your direction.

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:Almost all of them are being killed long before they can get to you by the sheer amount of weapons fire that's emitting off of the ship that you left above you, or behind you, because orientation is weird in space.

Gamemaster:But there are a handful that have made, like, a break towards you and are now close enough that the ship cannot fire on them for fear of killing you instead.

Gamemaster:With the crit, you can see that this particular piece of arrow, you don't know if they all look like this, but this one is this yellow-skinned, almost lizard-like creature that is almost entirely mouth.

Gamemaster:Like, the front three quarters of the creature is this Giant gaping maw, and you can see, kind of like a xenomorph, on the inside there appears to be a second jaw, this time rotated 90 degrees, and all of the teeth are gnashing as it heads in your direction, propelled by some kind of magical force.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:You can see the end of it is just this extended tail.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:You are far enough away with that perception check that you have caught it early.

Gamemaster:So if you want, you guys can attempt to change your trajectory together and steer out of the way of it because you're moving fast enough that you will pass it by if you can adjust your trajectory.

Gamemaster:Alternatively, you can try and take it head on and just punch your way through it.

Gamemaster:It depends on which you would rather do in this position.

Gamemaster:If you want to try risking moving together as a formation, or if you want to just concentrate firepower forward to make your way through it.

Foral:How far is it?

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, you guys don't have a really good idea of how strong an individual piece of arrow is compared to the swarm as a whole.

Gamemaster:So you don't know quite how much it would take to knock this thing out of your way.

Gamemaster:At this point, you've caught it about a mile away, but at the speed you're going, it's probably 18 seconds in terms of travel.

Foral:Okay.

Foral:What do you guys say?

Foral:Go for it or?

Scrazzy:I think we try to move out of the way.

Foral:You don't want to punch through it.

Scrazzy:I'd rather save whatever I have for future battles.

Foral:All right.

Foral:Fine.

Foral:You guys should bring longer range artillery next time.

Gamemaster:okay so you guys are trying to steer out of the way absolutely

Ozzie:Yeah, I've got this... My... My mall.

Ozzie:That's all I got.

Ozzie:So...

Foral:all right well gamma formation yeah if it gets within my range increment i will take a top shot okay

Scrazzy:Mm hmm.

Gamemaster:So the way I think this will work is you guys have had enough time.

Gamemaster:You've recovered from the initial G-Force shock.

Gamemaster:You are all conscious.

Gamemaster:And you are, despite the fact that you're all moving at very fast speeds, you're not really accelerating all that quickly yet.

Gamemaster:So if need be, you guys can maneuver together in order to kind of...

Foral:Uh-huh.

Gamemaster:try and make this trajectory shift at the same time.

Gamemaster:I will still need everybody here to make either a reflex save or a different skill if you can justify it.

Gamemaster:But I will allow all of you collectively to have a plus four circumstance bonus to the shift because you can follow somebody who is an expert in this particular shift.

Ozzie:I don't think I have anything else I can argue.

Scrazzy:Don't shut up.

Ozzie:So.

Foral:Can I throw a hand or rope out to make it an athletics check for my friend?

Foral:So we can grab that.

Gamemaster:Sorry.

Gamemaster:Oh, okay, so you're putting a rope out, and then you want him to grab onto it, and then when you maneuver, you'll pull him with you, and so it's an athletics check on his behalf to hold onto the rope.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Yes.

Gamemaster:I'd accept that.

Gamemaster:That's fine.

Gamemaster:That works for me.

Foral:Great, great.

Ozzie:Right.

Gamemaster:You're towing him along effectively.

Foral:Yes.

Ozzie:Do I still get a circumstance bonus in that regard?

Gamemaster:You do, yeah.

Foral:Oh, I forgot to add mine.

Gamemaster:You all, because you're moving as a group, you get the plus four.

Foral:So mine's a 32 with the plus 4.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Great.

Gamemaster:Hot damn.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:So two of you critically succeed.

Gamemaster:One of you regular succeeds.

Gamemaster:So two of you make this kind of hard turn to shift yourselves without necessarily going at too much of an angle against the barrier itself.

Foral:Right.

Gamemaster:Scrazzy, unfortunately, not either as practiced or...

Gamemaster:having a rope to hold onto to help with correcting his trajectory, uh, unfortunately makes a little bit of an overcorrection there.

Gamemaster:Um, so Scrazzy, I need from you, uh, I'm going to make this, this is going to be intelligence based because I want to see if make this either Arcana or nature, um, to see if Scrazzy can identify that he's perhaps overcorrected compared to his companions, uh, and can return back to base.

Foral:Thank you.

Gamemaster:ridiculously high roll.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:He can see that he turned a little harder than the other two, and if he let that go for much longer, he would have eventually separated from you, but he rolled really well, so he can make that small adjustment to get back in line with the other two of you as you continue your descent.

Gamemaster:Fortunately, all of you did really well on that particular check, so another...

Gamemaster:6 and then Tywelwyn then 18 seconds, and you shoot by this thing that was headed in your direction, moving almost as fast as you, but upwards.

Gamemaster:So you all just pass right by it.

Gamemaster:If you want, you can take a potshot at it as you go by, but you have successfully moved out of the way of this particular brood.

Ozzie:Do we get a good look at what one of these units is?

Gamemaster:Sure, roll a perception or nature as you pass by to try and get a better understanding of it.

Ozzie:Checking my nature.

Scrazzy:i'll try nature i think i moved one of scratchy's things scratchy is a plus 10 to nature 25 uh yes

Ozzie:They're the same.

Ozzie:I guess we'll do perception.

Ozzie:Okay.

Ozzie:24, sure.

Gamemaster:Oh, is he trained?

Ozzie:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Okay, I just... I gave him trained.

Gamemaster:He wasn't trained in Foundry.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you got a 25 and a 24.

Gamemaster:Both of those are pretty good.

Gamemaster:Okay, so as you pass by, you can see...

Gamemaster:You guys are moving at not relativistic speeds, but at faster speeds than a person normally moves.

Foral:thank you

Gamemaster:So it's still a little difficult to get a sense of Scale, even as you pass by.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:As you shoot by this thing, though, it is...

Gamemaster:It's like tadpole-shaped, almost.

Gamemaster:The forward-facing piece of it is this large sphere that is one massive slobbering jaw with another massive slobbering jaw on the inside.

Gamemaster:And then it all kind of tapers into this long tail.

Gamemaster:The whole thing is covered in this sickly yellow-looking coloration of Scale.

Foral:Did it eat the deep?

Gamemaster:It's...

Gamemaster:It's not quite lizard-like.

Gamemaster:It's almost like some mix between lizard and amphibian there.

Gamemaster:But it's...

Gamemaster:It's very much like a tadpole, except it's been scaled massively upwards.

Gamemaster:This thing is maybe from the front of its jaw to the end of its tail, like 40 feet long, something like that, you would guess.

Gamemaster:It doesn't look like it has legs or anything.

Gamemaster:It also seems to be fine in space.

Gamemaster:You don't know how it would fare, like, on land.

Gamemaster:Also, this is your first direct exposure to a piece of the harrow.

Gamemaster:You have no way of knowing at this point if all of the harrow looks like this, or if this is just, like, an aspect of it.

Foral:Has it eaten the remains of the deep at any point?

Gamemaster:The only thing you guys know related to the harrow is it's this thing that has eaten... You know that tithe is the tenth thesian that it's eaten.

Gamemaster:But beyond that, like, you don't know much about it.

Scrazzy:you you

Gamemaster:Yes.

Gamemaster:You wouldn't know.

Gamemaster:like unfortunately you guys like you know that the deep got killed almost 10 000 sorry almost a thousand years ago at this point so it might be in a history book somewhere or something uh but you you don't know um

Foral:God damn it.

Foral:It sounds like it did.

Foral:We could have taken it.

Gamemaster:That said, you guys narrowly dodge it as it gnashes its teeth as you pass it much faster than it can turn around to get to you.

Gamemaster:And you continue hurtling towards the barrier.

Gamemaster:It looks like at this point there are no more obstacles in your way.

Gamemaster:There is just the barrier itself.

Gamemaster:And so there is a question of how close are you trying to get to the barrier before you translate into the slip?

Gamemaster:It's literally just a timing check.

Gamemaster:You just have to hit a button.

Gamemaster:But all of you need to try and hit the button at the same time.

Foral:I vote close.

Gamemaster:So you're trying to get close?

Foral:What do you guys think?

Scrazzy:Close, but not very close.

Ozzie:Right.

Ozzie:I think one degree removed from absolute racer's edge...

Gamemaster:Okay, one second.

Gamemaster:So the distances here are...

Gamemaster:One of three ranges.

Gamemaster:It's either close, near, or far are your three options here.

Foral:So do you want to do near?

Gamemaster:Close is within 100 feet.

Gamemaster:It is right before you get to it.

Gamemaster:You're trying to do it as close as possible.

Scrazzy:Mere.

Gamemaster:Near is from close up to maybe a mile away.

Gamemaster:It's still not a lot of time, but that is enough time for you to maybe coordinate.

Gamemaster:Far is any time like more than a mile away.

Gamemaster:Far is easy.

Gamemaster:All of you can do it without any relatively difficult coordination.

Gamemaster:You just have the concern that it might make your trip in the slip longer or perhaps more dangerous.

Gamemaster:You're going for near?

Ozzie:I like Nier.

Scrazzy:Yeah.

Foral:out.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:If you're going for near, then I would love...

Gamemaster:All of you to justify to me what check each of you would make to try and coordinate hitting the button to swap into the slip at the same time.

Gamemaster:You're communicating with each other.

Gamemaster:You're like honestly feet apart from each other at this point, all just hurtling at very fast speed.

Gamemaster:But what method are you using to ensure that you all go into the slip at the same time?

Foral:I would like to use a reflex save and shout now.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:It's literally just a 3, 2, 1, go.

Scrazzy:I think I can't, that makes sense.

Scrazzy:I don't have anything special.

Ozzie:Yeah, I don't know if I really... Like... You talking to me?

Foral:Does your character know like any traditional.

Foral:energy-flowing dances, and they think they can time it that way.

Foral:Maybe they can make that an athletic... Yeah!

Ozzie:I don't know anything about the flow of energy.

Foral:Do you have any tempo, athletic things you can just... Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Gamemaster:Oh, right.

Gamemaster:You had that metronome in your pocket because of that backstory thing, right?

Scrazzy:Wait, can we push other people's buttons?

Foral:Do you guys want me to...

Gamemaster:Yeah, probably.

Gamemaster:If you guys get close enough, if you arrange it, you might be able to reach over and hit the button on somebody else's wrist.

Gamemaster:It's like part of the crystal wristwatch thing you have.

Gamemaster:So it's just on one of your arms.

Gamemaster:You have this thing that needs to be hit.

Foral:I can try hitting mine and Tanner's.

Ozzie:I have a 10 for reflex, so it's not horrible.

Foral:Oh, it's not the worst.

Gamemaster:But if you all just want to go with 3, 2, 1 now, you absolutely can.

Foral:All right.

Gamemaster:If that's what we're doing, then I'm going to need a reflex save from all of you.

Scrazzy:Bro.

Foral:Oof.

Foral:I'll reroll mine.

Foral:So.

Scrazzy:We're eating fucking dookie sandwiches today.

Scrazzy:Hold on, hold on, hold on.

Gamemaster:Okay, a 26, a 29.

Scrazzy:I'm re-rolling, I'm re-rolling.

Ozzie:A 39.

Scrazzy:Okay.

Gamemaster:Nice.

Gamemaster:And a 39.

Gamemaster:Crazy.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:All of you more than succeed.

Gamemaster:Very impromptu bit of coordination here, but you guys have worked together.

Gamemaster:You've pulled each other out of the mud.

Gamemaster:So you're prepped for this.

Gamemaster:You're in time.

Gamemaster:Just as you get to as close as you can comfortably do it with still like human reaction times before you make contact with this shimmering, almost translucent barrier in front of you, you'll hit the button at the same time.

Gamemaster:And...

Gamemaster:there is this immediate sensation of your world shattering.

Gamemaster:And for a second, you think that you didn't get it right.

Gamemaster:You think that you messed up because your entire worldview seems to crack as if you were looking out a pane of glass.

Gamemaster:But you continue moving forward into this crack and it spreads and cracks again and reforms and cracks again.

Gamemaster:And then gravity takes over.

Gamemaster:That's probably not... Gravity is the wrong feeling here, because it's not a particular thing pulling you in a single direction.

Gamemaster:But instead, you find yourselves floating.

Gamemaster:Like, all of the inertia has left you.

Gamemaster:Like, you're immediately, instantaneously stopped in this empty, white void.

Gamemaster:All with, like, strangely different orientations.

Gamemaster:Can I get a perception check, please?

Foral:Thank you.

Ozzie:Not me.

Ozzie:Oh!

Gamemaster:Wild.

Scrazzy:Nice shot.

Gamemaster:Nice shot.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:32 crit.

Gamemaster:Despite the fact that you are just in an open, weirdly foggy white void, you all have the sensation that you are standing on something.

Gamemaster:Like there's some kind of gravity pulling you towards a floor, even if there is no visible floor.

Foral:uh-huh

Gamemaster:The only strange thing is that none of you are standing on the same floor.

Gamemaster:None of you are even standing in the same direction.

Gamemaster:Foral, you look around and you can see from your perspective when you look up, Ozzie appears to be standing at like a 45 degree angle from you, a distance away, and Scrazzy is fully upside down.

Gamemaster:It looks like he's on not the ceiling necessarily, but where a ceiling would be if there was stuff here.

Foral:oh

Gamemaster:But besides the weird gravitational anomaly stuff, you find that you can walk around...

Gamemaster:And as you walk towards Ozzie, you note that the ground almost seems to be sloping slightly until as you walk closer to him, you have reached his orientation.

Gamemaster:And now it looks like he's standing up straight.

Gamemaster:But at the same time, Scrazzy is kind of rotated this way.

Gamemaster:So he's like 80 degrees off of upside down.

Foral:Hey guys.

Gamemaster:It appears that you were in the interior of a sphere of some kind.

Scrazzy:you

Foral:You know that episode of Esoteric Things?

Foral:I think we're in the upside down.

Ozzie:Hmm.

Ozzie:Seems like it.

Foral:Yeah.

Ozzie:We look like we're inside of a sphere.

Gamemaster:You don't see a sphere outside of you.

Gamemaster:In fact, you don't even see anything that you're necessarily standing on.

Gamemaster:But from the crit from Foral, like looking around and walking around, it's like you're walking on the interior of an invisible sphere where gravity is always pointing down from whatever that perspective is.

Ozzie:Mm-hmm.

Ozzie:Oh.

Gamemaster:So Scrazzy is standing on the opposite side of the sphere from you on the interior.

Ozzie:Mm-hmm.

Ozzie:Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Foral:Thank you.

Gamemaster:And as such, his floor is opposite.

Gamemaster:It's where you're sealing it.

Ozzie:Make it a pretty small sphere.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:You would guess, like, radius-wise, maybe 100 feet.

Gamemaster:Like, from you to Scrazzy on the opposite end, it's 200 feet away.

Ozzie:Do we have any way of knowing if we've passed the barrier?

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Ozzie:Or we just gotta find a portal is kind of it.

Gamemaster:From where you are right now, who knows?

Gamemaster:Yeah, well, unfortunately, at this point, you don't have a way back anyway.

Gamemaster:So if you want to leave the slip, then you need to find a portal of some kind.

Gamemaster:That said, there is a very faint blue LCD clock that has displayed on your crystal wristband that started at 30 and is now starting to count down.

Foral:Well, do we know which direction we're supposed to go?

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Foral:Do we have a compass or anything?

Gamemaster:Right now, you are just in the void.

Gamemaster:They said when they launched you that there isn't a good way of knowing what's going to be in the slip before you get there, so there wasn't a lot they could prepare you for.

Foral:Am I?

Gamemaster:They're really just hoping that at least one of the groups figures out how to leave in the time that they're given, and that it's on the correct side of the barrier.

Ozzie:Well, then we just got to go forward and see if something shows up

Foral:My crit only got that there's a sphere.

Foral:I have no other inclination of where to go.

Gamemaster:At this point, with you guys just showing up in the sphere, no.

Gamemaster:I mean, with the crit, you're just like looking around.

Gamemaster:There hasn't necessarily been anything to investigate at this point, but you've just kind of gotten a bearing of the area that you're in.

Scrazzy:Let me look at something real quick.

Foral:Well, who hit the button last?

Ozzie:Probably me.

Scrazzy:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Oh, like who went in last?

Gamemaster:Oh, that's a good call-out.

Gamemaster:That would have been Ozzie, because he got the lowest roll.

Foral:Alright, let's go Ozzie's direction.

Gamemaster:Actually, no.

Gamemaster:Ozzie, no.

Gamemaster:I take it back.

Gamemaster:It wouldn't have been Ozzie.

Gamemaster:It would have been Scrazzy, because Scrazzy would have been the closest to the barrier before hitting the button.

Foral:Yeah, that's what I thought.

Foral:So let's just go Scrazzy's way.

Scrazzy:Let me double check.

Scrazzy:And Scrazzy will take a finger, stick it in Bob's mouth, and put it up.

Scrazzy:What are you feeling, Bob?

Foral:Terrible.

Gamemaster:Does Bob have saliva?

Scrazzy:What are you feeling, Bob?

Scrazzy:I think we should end that way.

Scrazzy:Bob does have saliva.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Sorry, so what are you doing?

Ozzie:Gross.

Gamemaster:Is that you're having Bob roll the check?

Gamemaster:Or you were just doing that?

Scrazzy:I guess survival... Well, I was...

Gamemaster:Yeah, you can have Bob roll a survival check if you like.

Scrazzy:I guess we sort of know the direction.

Scrazzy:He has a plus six.

Scrazzy:We're rolling in the old-fashioned way.

Scrazzy:Fucking 11.

Gamemaster:there's unfortunately at the moment not a lot to go on you guys haven't like moved about the space at all you're just standing there and it just seems to be endless white cloud like white fog so it doesn't really help

Scrazzy:Fair enough.

Scrazzy:We'll head Scrazzy's way.

Gamemaster:Okay, so, just to clarify, like, you're all on the interior of a sphere.

Gamemaster:So, when you say, head Scrazzy's way, what does that mean?

Gamemaster:Like, does that mean you're waiting for the other two companions of yours to walk to you?

Scrazzy:Josh, I don't know.

Gamemaster:Are you trying to... Okay.

Ozzie:We're going to walk in his direction from where we are and then continue in that direction.

Scrazzy:Yeah.

Foral:Yeah, so it's like making a line.

Gamemaster:Okay, so, I will note, since you are on the interior of a sphere, and you are on the opposite side of the sphere from Scrazzy, literally any direction you walk will take you towards Scrazzy.

Foral:Okay.

Scrazzy:But shouldn't we have a line?

Foral:Okay, wait, wait, wait.

Scrazzy:We have three points.

Foral:We should both... Yeah, so we should both... If we both walk, we'll get the...

Gamemaster:Yeah, so, all that I mean to say is, Scrazzy is standing here on the interior like a stalactite.

Gamemaster:You guys are here, so if you walk this way or you walk this way or you walk this way, regardless of the direction that you walk, you will eventually make it too scrazzy.

Foral:Wait, but we came from different angles.

Foral:So if we go there and then we will have like a gram like this, we then go here.

Foral:We go the middle of the two ways.

Foral:You see?

Gamemaster:No, I don't.

Gamemaster:I... Okay.

Foral:So it.

Foral:So if Tanner is on one spot and walks this direction and I walk this way and then we we both meet at Scrazzy.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Eventually you will meet up at Scrazzy.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:But if we keep going, we both go this way.

Foral:Instead, we'll go.

Foral:Cut it.

Gamemaster:You can do that.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:So step one is you guys are walking in opposite directions so that you meet up at Scrazzy at the same time.

Foral:Yeah?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Foral:Is anyone with an Arcana check?

Foral:Can anyone make an Arcana check to try to figure this out?

Gamemaster:Yeah, you can try that if you like.

Scrazzy:Sure.

Ozzie:My character is dumb as rocks.

Gamemaster:Listen, sometimes you jump into non-Euclidean land and it's non-Euclidean.

Gamemaster:It happens.

Scrazzy:32.

Gamemaster:Although in this particular instance, it's fully Euclidean.

Gamemaster:We haven't even gotten to the non-Euclidean bit yet.

Gamemaster:32.

Gamemaster:Okay, 32.

Gamemaster:There is...

Gamemaster:an interesting phenomenon going on with the 32 in Arcana.

Gamemaster:You watch as... You watch as Ozzie starts walking up one direction to make his way towards you, and Forel walks in the opposite direction, and because this is how spheres work, they will both meet up at you in the center.

Gamemaster:But there is something funky...

Gamemaster:going on with... There's something funky going on with the magic, like with just the ambient magic in the slip as it follows them.

Gamemaster:With a 32, that's a very good roll.

Gamemaster:I think if you had rolled any lower, it would have been difficult to pinpoint exactly what is strange about it.

Gamemaster:But I think the thing you note is the direction that Ozzie takes as he walks around.

Gamemaster:We'll call it clockwise, just for the sake of easily referring to it.

Gamemaster:The mana that follows him is almost sluggish.

Gamemaster:Like, as he walks, it takes a little bit of time for it to catch up to him.

Foral:All right.

Gamemaster:as he gets to you.

Gamemaster:It's a barely discernible amount of sluggishness, but given how good Scrazzy is at reading magic energy, it does stand out to him.

Gamemaster:To the other point, looking at Thoril going counterclockwise...

Gamemaster:The magic flow there is exceptionally snappy.

Gamemaster:It's actually snappier than you'd expect.

Gamemaster:It's almost leading him a little bit.

Gamemaster:Like, the mana is slightly in front of him in the direction that he's walking, as if it's going there first.

Foral:is mana like does it fall like diffusion principles where it's like it goes away from high concentrated areas or is it more like gravity where more mana pulls more mana

Gamemaster:And then they both get to you, and you are now all three stood together at one point on the sphere.

Gamemaster:Mana is attracted generally to things with high momentum.

Gamemaster:So kind of like gravity, but specifically for things with momentum instead of with mass.

Foral:So I assume that's closer to the planet, right?

Foral:That's what we'd assume?

Scrazzy:and i think is in the direction of Ozzie because Ozzie was going upstream yes

Ozzie:So we gotta find the sink.

Foral:What is the economy?

Foral:Yeah, yeah.

Foral:It's the path that Floral's taking.

Foral:Because we're all at Aussie.

Foral:Does that make sense from an Arcana point of view?

Gamemaster:If that is your particular theory, then yes, that does.

Gamemaster:If that's what you're working with.

Foral:Yeah, but does the theory make sense from an Arcana point of view?

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you guys are continuing counterclockwise in the direction that formal was walking.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:As you continue to walk forward, Scrazzy, you are keeping Anaïs on the flow of mana here.

Gamemaster:There is this unfortunate...

Gamemaster:feature of the fact that you guys are walking around an invisible sphere in an endless white void, that now all three of you are together, and as such, you don't have a way of identifying how much you've walked around the sphere, because there's no independent marker that would tell you, oh, we've made one full rotation, or anything like that.

Foral:Can I check my Fitbit?

Gamemaster:So, unfortunately, you just have to walk and hope that you've... You don't have a Fitbit.

Foral:Damn it.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Scrazzy:You're supposed to say yes and, Josh.

Gamemaster:Also,

Gamemaster:Listen, I'm sure there is a magic Fitbit in Sedecium somewhere.

Gamemaster:But no, you don't have one.

Gamemaster:As you continue walking forward, Scrazzy, because you rolled a crit on that check, I will say that you notice an interesting phenomenon.

Gamemaster:As you continue walking forward, you know that you are walking in the interior of a sphere, so eventually you are just going to retread the space you're on.

Foral:Thank you.

Gamemaster:You're not moving in a particular direction.

Gamemaster:But the...

Gamemaster:flow of mana around you seems to almost be leading you further and further.

Gamemaster:It is moving further and further ahead of you in the direction that you're walking.

Gamemaster:Can I get a perception check as well?

Scrazzy:From anyone in particular.

Scrazzy:I can roll.

Gamemaster:Anybody who has a wrist?

Foral:Twenty two.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:With the 22, there is that little LCD display.

Foral:Anyone else rolling?

Gamemaster:Oh, is somebody else rolling?

Gamemaster:I mean, you don't have to if you want to.

Scrazzy:Anyway.

Gamemaster:22.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:There is that little LCD display on your wrist that has the little timer on it.

Gamemaster:As you continue walking forward with that perception check, you notice something interesting.

Foral:Oh no.

Gamemaster:It doesn't seem to be proceeding at one second per second, at best what in your head that one second per second would be.

Gamemaster:As you continue forward, it seems almost to be counting down faster than you would expect.

Gamemaster:Like as you count one, two, three, it's already on four or five.

Gamemaster:It's not like twice as fast, but it is faster.

Gamemaster:And as you continue walking, you note that it seems to be speeding up.

Foral:Should we run fast?

Foral:Should we run?

Foral:Or should we go in the opposite direction?

Ozzie:No, I think we're probably going the right way.

Ozzie:We just... We have to approach the point and then...

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Run!

Gamemaster:You start running forward.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:As you start running forward, Scrazzy, you note that the mana is pulling even further in front of you as you continue to run.

Scrazzy:We slow down.

Gamemaster:It's almost like you would guesstimate a third of the way up the sphere at this point, leading ahead of you.

Gamemaster:And as you run, the count on the timer speeds up.

Gamemaster:It's getting faster and faster as you continue to run.

Foral:We slow down.

Foral:If we slow down, longer distance, but the magic goes slower.

Foral:Because it's attracted to mana.

Scrazzy:Test the theory.

Gamemaster:Okay, you slow down.

Foral:It's attracted to momentum.

Gamemaster:If you slow down, it continues to count down faster and faster, but the rate of acceleration that it is speeding up has slowed down.

Gamemaster:Yes, the jerk.

Ozzie:Jerk.

Scrazzy:Nice.

Gamemaster:The jerk has reduced now that you're no longer running.

Gamemaster:But you are eating about two seconds a second at this point, and it's still continuing to climb.

Scrazzy:Yeah, what if we walk backwards?

Foral:Does anyone know how to moonwalk?

Gamemaster:It now says you've hit 22 minutes remaining on your timer.

Gamemaster:You've been in here about four.

Gamemaster:Like you turn around or you just start walking backwards.

Scrazzy:We walk backwards in the same direction.

Foral:Perfectly moonwalking.

Gamemaster:Oh, you are continuing in the direction that you're already moving, but you have turned around so that you were, like, backwards.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Gamemaster:You turn around and you start walking backwards in the same direction that you're moving, and the clock continues to speed up at the same rate as it was when you were walking forwards, facing forwards.

Foral:Damn it.

Foral:All right.

Foral:Should we cut this at an angle or just keep going?

Scrazzy:I'm not 100% sure here.

Scrazzy:Do we go the other way and it's slow?

Scrazzy:I mean...

Ozzie:So here's the question.

Ozzie:If we keep going further and further, it's going to continue to accelerate.

Ozzie:And what's the breaking point?

Ozzie:Is there a breaking point?

Foral:We don't know.

Ozzie:If you go the other way, probably it'll asymptotically approach zero.

Foral:But if we go opposite of it, does it stop moving?

Ozzie:So it will slow, but theoretically never fully stop.

Ozzie:So what is the breaking point in that direction?

Foral:I just want to take a little bit to go the opposite direction.

Gamemaster:Like walking backwards from the direction that you were facing.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:If you start walking the direction that you're facing, then it starts to slow down the rate at which it's taking through.

Foral:Do we take it at an angle?

Foral:Like we want to go forward, but at an angle?

Ozzie:That's just going to eat more time.

Ozzie:I mean, it's the...

Foral:It's going to need more time, but reduce the time.

Foral:This is really just a matter of, can we cross the distance before it runs out?

Foral:And we don't know.

Foral:I guess we just got to take it, huh?

Foral:What other?

Scrazzy:uh i mean we're probably on like in a ball walking on something and we just yeah i was gonna wait for like five minutes left to do that uh

Ozzie:What, you think we're in a hamster ball?

Ozzie:Hmm.

Foral:Should I try shooting the wall?

Foral:I could just try shooting it.

Foral:I'm going to leave a coin or something where we're walking just so we know if we pass it again.

Scrazzy:Not sure if there's that many downsides to that.

Scrazzy:We could just die immediately.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you're taking a coin and then putting it down on the floor, and then which direction are you walking?

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Clockwise or counterclockwise?

Foral:Counterclockwise, which is what we think is the direction there.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Foral:Yep.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Gamemaster:You start walking counterclockwise, and as you do, you see that you've left the coin behind and it continues to stay on the sphere as it maneuvers around.

Gamemaster:The timer does start to speed up again as you start doing this.

Foral:Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:You complete a full rotation, because you have successfully identified a way to mark when you've walked a full rotation.

Foral:Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:When you get back, the coin is... It's like developed a patina.

Gamemaster:It's almost like faded a little bit.

Foral:So time's passed.

Gamemaster:If you continue walking...

Gamemaster:As you continue walking, time is continuing to speed up.

Gamemaster:Each rotation at this point seems to be taking, like, three minutes total.

Gamemaster:So that one rotation you went from 22 minutes to 19.

Gamemaster:If you make another rotation at the rate of the speed, it's going to be four minutes.

Gamemaster:So you're going to be at 15 minutes by the time you get to the coin again.

Gamemaster:You continue walking forward.

Foral:I'm just trying to think about a way to make money off this.

Foral:Do we have anything that we can age?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You continue walking forward, and when you get back to the coin again, it has substantially degraded.

Gamemaster:It is like there are holes of bits of it that seem to have just fully turned into powder at this point.

Gamemaster:It is no longer a coin by any means, but it is still visible.

Gamemaster:You make another rotation here at this point.

Gamemaster:It's going to be at 10 minutes by the time you make it back to the coin.

Gamemaster:Are you continuing?

Foral:Wait a second, wait a second.

Foral:Should we leave one of us here?

Foral:And then we take turns?

Foral:Does that make it worse?

Ozzie:Take turns doing rotations.

Foral:Yeah.

Scrazzy:I'm already old.

Foral:I don't know how... Heh heh.

Scrazzy:Just do a lab.

Gamemaster:Okay, so is that Scrazzy saying that he'll stay by where the coin is and then the other two will walk forward?

Scrazzy:Yeah.

Foral:If you're old, you'd be the one to not do this.

Scrazzy:Can't get much more old than this.

Foral:All right.

Foral:Let's do that.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Okay, so Scrazzy stays put where the coin was and then the other two proceed forward.

Gamemaster:You make a full lap around.

Scrazzy:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Scrazzy, looking at your watch, they make it to you when it still says 12 minutes on your watch.

Gamemaster:The two of you, when you make it to Scrazzy, it says 10 on yours.

Foral:All right, so we take turns.

Foral:I'll take the next one.

Foral:You two stay.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Scrazzy:He's going to be sold when we get back to him.

Gamemaster:Okay, so the two of you are staying and then just Forel is moving forward.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Can I get... No, no, no.

Scrazzy:Wait.

Scrazzy:Why are two of us going?

Scrazzy:One of us goes.

Foral:No, we should preserve two clocks if we can.

Gamemaster:The two of you are staying.

Gamemaster:It's just Forel's moving forward, right?

Scrazzy:Oh, yeah, no, that's what I mean.

Scrazzy:But two people... Okay, okay, okay.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I... Ozzie and Scrazzy are staying.

Foral:I'm going to keep walking.

Foral:Two people stay.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Forel is walking.

Scrazzy:That makes sense.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Can I get a perception check from...

Gamemaster:The two who are stationary right now.

Gamemaster:As he watches, Forel walks up and around and behind you and back.

Gamemaster:28.

Scrazzy:21.

Scrazzy:All right.

Ozzie:28.

Gamemaster:With a 28, you're just looking around.

Gamemaster:You're keeping Anaïs on your timer, of course, because it is continuing to take down dangerously quickly at this point.

Gamemaster:But you're also keeping Anaïs out as Forel walks around.

Gamemaster:And with a 28, you note that there appears to be... Before Scrazzy was following the flow of mana around him, it seems that there's also a physical thing that has started to follow Forel.

Gamemaster:Or maybe form around him?

Gamemaster:You're not quite sure.

Gamemaster:There's this faint, very faint thread.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:that has kind of formed, it's not quite attached to him, but it's being pulled behind him and wrapped around this path that you're taking.

Foral:Oh, cognitive self.

Gamemaster:And then he makes his way back to your position.

Gamemaster:He has apparently, it looks like, made this thread kind of wrap around the sphere in some way.

Gamemaster:Foral, at this point, you have six minutes remaining on your timer.

Gamemaster:The two of you have eight.

Foral:Does Snazzy have more, though, because he waited one cycle?

Gamemaster:You're correct.

Gamemaster:Snazzy would still be up to nine.

Foral:OK, Snazzy, your turn to take a lap.

Scrazzy:Scrazzy takes a lap.

Gamemaster:Sorry, Scrazzy.

Gamemaster:I apologize.

Gamemaster:Not your name.

Gamemaster:It's fine.

Gamemaster:Scrazzy goes and takes a lap.

Gamemaster:Similarly, at this point, he seems to be treading more of this, like, gossamer thread behind him.

Gamemaster:It's interesting.

Gamemaster:That's like a phenomenon that you hadn't seen before.

Foral:And Scrazzy should have lower momentum because he skipped two cycles around.

Gamemaster:You don't know if it's because you've walked far enough, or it's because of some other thing that, like, has been happening.

Gamemaster:But it is a change, which feels promising.

Ozzie:you

Gamemaster:As Scrazzy walks around, he makes it back to you.

Gamemaster:He's deposited substantially more of the thread, enough that it leaves physical residue in the path that he's taken.

Gamemaster:You guys can actually see a very slight ribbon around the path that you've been walking.

Gamemaster:Scrazzy, you are now at five minutes.

Gamemaster:Ozzie, you are at seven.

Gamemaster:Forel, you are at five.

Scrazzy:Couple of homeless thing.

Ozzie:So now do I go?

Ozzie:I'm gonna go.

Foral:Yeah, you go.

Ozzie:I don't...

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Gamemaster:You continue forward, once again, at this point, pulling enough thread forward that you continue to make this path opaque.

Gamemaster:Can I get another perception check from the two stationary people?

Scrazzy:23.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:23 is a success.

Gamemaster:So you note stuff.

Gamemaster:There is an interesting thing happening with the Gossamer thread.

Gamemaster:First of all...

Gamemaster:Scrazzy, you've been following the flow of magic.

Gamemaster:This thread is reified magic in some form.

Gamemaster:It seems to just be spontaneously occurring due to the quantity of magic that you guys have collected over multiple rotations around the sphere.

Foral:Uh huh.

Gamemaster:With a 23, the other thing of note is you would expect, if you're all walking on a straight line...

Gamemaster:for it to form a perfect arc around the sphere as you continue walking.

Gamemaster:But there is about two-thirds of the way up the sphere from your perspective, a bit where the thread almost bends slightly and then comes back.

Gamemaster:It's strange.

Gamemaster:From this distance, you can't quite see why it's bending.

Gamemaster:It's almost like there's a lump in the sphere, but it doesn't look like anybody's... There's nothing in your way when you walk that way.

Gamemaster:You don't trip on anything.

Scrazzy:go check it out sure

Foral:What's our times now?

Gamemaster:After another rotation, that would leave... So both of you lost one more minute, so I think you're both at four minutes.

Gamemaster:And then Ozzie is at three.

Foral:OK.

Ozzie:we gotta go to the spot and see what happens there and if we have to break through at that spot or see if there's something there I don't know we don't have a choice

Foral:So we don't have another rotation in us.

Foral:So let's try going to this hole, this weird hiccup.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay, so the three of you, as a group, move towards the wobble.

Scrazzy:We go to the wobble.

Gamemaster:All three of you walking in this accelerated form does bring your timers down to two minutes as you make it to the wobble.

Gamemaster:The wobble is interesting as you get closer.

Gamemaster:It is...

Gamemaster:As you approach it, it seems to straighten out almost.

Gamemaster:You would not be able to see it as you're just walking.

Gamemaster:It's something that you can only really notice from a distance, like if one person walked and another person stayed stationary.

Gamemaster:But there is... You've gotten to the point that you feel is the center of the wobble.

Gamemaster:From the perspective of where you're standing right now, it's perfectly straight, but...

Foral:I take out one of my water bottles and I just start pouring water around.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Like on the floor around where that wobble of the filament is?

Foral:Yeah, I'm trying gradient descent.

Foral:Maybe this will find some optima.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:You pour a bunch of water around wherever the wobble is and you note that all of the water does pool almost in one spot.

Gamemaster:Like kind of on where the fabric is.

Foral:And the water doesn't pass through.

Foral:It stays there.

Gamemaster:The water doesn't seem to pass through.

Gamemaster:If anything, the thing of note is it pools, but it doesn't pool in a perfect spherical shape like you would expect.

Gamemaster:It pools in an oval almost.

Gamemaster:Like if you look at it straight on, it pools following the line of the gossamer thread so that it's longer on the path and stouter in the middle.

Foral:Magic Boy wouldn't do anything?

Scrazzy:I want to pop a hole in it.

Foral:I'd start firing.

Gamemaster:Do you just shoot, like, in the middle of the puddle?

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You don't need to roll an attack.

Gamemaster:You're shooting the floor.

Gamemaster:I believe you can hit the floor.

Gamemaster:So just roll damage.

Foral:I believe I'd probably crit on the floor, right?

Gamemaster:Yeah, sure.

Gamemaster:You can hit the floor.

Foral:I have a silencer, so it's not as loud anymore.

Gamemaster:61.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:With a 61, the bullet shoots straight into the puddle and is gone.

Gamemaster:No.

Foral:Does the puddle start emptying?

Scrazzy:scratchy jumps into the puddle I guess that's why they call it a fortitude save

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Scrazzy, make a fortitude save.

Foral:I follow Scrazzy.

Gamemaster:You also need to make a fortitude save.

Ozzie:Heyo.

Foral:I like how our other members are like, well, I guess they're going to die.

Gamemaster:Okay, 15.

Gamemaster:Okay, so the two of you watch first as Scrazzy jumps into the puddle.

Gamemaster:Despite the fact that you would expect like a little hop and then there's a splash as he hits the ground.

Gamemaster:Instead, you watch as Scrazzy's feet approach the puddle.

Gamemaster:There's this weird...

Gamemaster:stretching distortion effect on his feet as they get pulled forward into wherever the puddle is, as the rest of him gets pulled into it as well.

Gamemaster:It does not look particularly comfortable.

Gamemaster:You see this immediate expression of pain on Scrazzy's face?

Gamemaster:Scrazzy, you feel as your legs are...

Gamemaster:twisted into a small, like, spaghetti extruder shape as you are pulled through this hole that you jumped into.

Gamemaster:You are going to take some bludgeoning damage as you get stretched into this weird distortion that you found.

Gamemaster:With a 23, Foral soon follows.

Gamemaster:managing to only take half damage from this bludgeoning.

Gamemaster:But similarly, Ozzie, you standing there, watch your two companions jump into this puddle of water, get spaghettified, and then disappear.

Ozzie:I was just waiting to make sure they both made it through.

Ozzie:And so now I will go.

Gamemaster:Okay, sure.

Foral:Right at his face, he's going to go, don't jump!

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Foral:I'm kidding.

Foral:You motherfucker.

Scrazzy:No!

Scrazzy:Oh, okay.

Gamemaster:Hot damn!

Gamemaster:Ozzie sees the two of you in immense pain, and it doesn't faze him in the slightest.

Foral:He actually was just waiting for us.

Foral:He cannonballs.

Foral:Oh, I should hold my feet together.

Gamemaster:23 points of bludgeoning damage halved for Foral, who succeeded on his check.

Foral:Can you make my character appear somewhere just so I can click F?

Gamemaster:Uh, sure.

Foral:Thank you.

Ozzie:Is the damage zeroed for me?

Gamemaster:The damage is zeroed for you, yes.

Foral:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You jump through this weird sensation and you get pulled, spaghettified through this strange

Gamemaster:And I'm going to... Actually, it's more fun if you guys roll.

Gamemaster:Can somebody do me a favor and roll a d100?

Gamemaster:And because you spent...

Gamemaster:29 of your minutes collectively walking around the interior of this thing.

Gamemaster:Can you subtract 58 from this roll?

Gamemaster:So D100 minus 58.

Ozzie:Oh no.

Foral:I thought we used 28, not 29.

Scrazzy:Negative three.

Gamemaster:You used 28 and then you spent some time playing with water and shooting the ground and all of that kind of stuff.

Scrazzy:Water.

Gamemaster:Negative three is crazy.

Ozzie:You subtracted over 50!

Gamemaster:Yeah, you guys spent a lot of time walking this marble forward.

Gamemaster:So, with a critical success on this D100 check, most of you in immense pain as you get reconstructed on the exterior of this marble.

Foral:That's a good thing.

Foral:Yes!

Gamemaster:Find yourselves in...

Gamemaster:Literally another empty white void.

Gamemaster:It feels like you haven't moved anywhere.

Gamemaster:With the slight caveat that now the gravitational pull isn't entirely down.

Gamemaster:You feel that you're still being pulled down towards whatever the floor of this would be as you pop out into a new area.

Gamemaster:But there is seemingly another pull pulling you...

Gamemaster:upward, almost.

Gamemaster:And it's this weird... I say upward because from your position, you can't really tell.

Gamemaster:It just feels like you're lighter.

Gamemaster:But if you walk slightly along the sphere in either direction, the pull of gravity changes orientation.

Gamemaster:And you see that that stays the same as you walk up the sphere.

Gamemaster:It seems to be pulling you towards the opposite end of this particular sphere.

Gamemaster:But there is a change.

Scrazzy:To the opposite end.

Gamemaster:Okay?

Gamemaster:As the three of you walk, it's a little difficult to kind of get your bearings as you continue forward, and gravity goes from making you lighter to making you twice as heavy.

Foral:All right.

Gamemaster:But as you get to wherever the second point is, there is another cracking glass sensation, and...

Gamemaster:with literally no time left on your timers.

Gamemaster:You make it to an exit point for this particular area.

Gamemaster:You rolled very well on that last check.

Foral:Yes, we moved the marble very close to where we needed to go.

Foral:Someone else should roll.

Gamemaster:You did.

Gamemaster:You figured that out pretty quickly, which was neat.

Gamemaster:You pop out the other side.

Gamemaster:One second.

Gamemaster:Can I get a perception check, please?

Gamemaster:As you feel the glass cracking and your sensation returns as you feel that you've made it back into real space.

Scrazzy:to two perceivers and including 21

Gamemaster:Up to?

Gamemaster:Yeah, up to and included.

Gamemaster:Zero to two inclusive.

Foral:Well that's better.

Gamemaster:Only one.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You guys... I mean, the immediate noticeable change is that you are hit by cool air.

Gamemaster:Which is significant, because before you went into the slip, you weren't in air.

Gamemaster:So you've made it to air.

Gamemaster:Good job.

Gamemaster:The second thing you notice with a 21 is that your feet are, like, sticky.

Foral:uh

Gamemaster:And you look down and it seems maybe some of that gossip or thread that you had been pulling behind generated by magic has like followed you out of the slip because there's a lot of it on the ground here.

Gamemaster:Actually, there's a lot of this thread on the ground here.

Gamemaster:And actually, looking around, it looks like some of the thread kind of comes off of the floor and is forming these kind of geometric shapes between the floor and the wall and the wall and the ceiling.

Gamemaster:And it takes you a second because I don't know necessarily what you were, you don't know what you were expecting when you make it onto the body of a Thessian that is the size of a planet.

Gamemaster:But I think your first thought wasn't, oh, spider den.

Foral:Josh, why'd you do this to yourself?

Gamemaster:But you're definitely in a spider den of some kind.

Gamemaster:It's fine.

Gamemaster:Sometimes there are spiders.

Gamemaster:One second.

Gamemaster:As I will pull out the spiders.

Foral:Which thesian is this again?

Gamemaster:Tithe.

Gamemaster:Just like this.

Ozzie:Why does he have spiders?

Gamemaster:As you have pulled yourselves.

Gamemaster:out of a portal from the slip into real space, into what appears to be a temple set up for the worship of or by spiders.

Scrazzy:oh spider temple oh i thought they were gonna be friendly can i roll a hate check for my can i roll a hate check for my initiative okay i have a plus a billion because of my backstory

Gamemaster:Yeah, who don't like you.

Gamemaster:So we are going to roll initiative is what's going to happen.

Foral:Oh, no.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:No, these spiders don't like you.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Foral:We might need some heals.

Gamemaster:I don't know what that would mean, so no.

Gamemaster:Sorry.

Foral:Can I write a stealth initiative since we just dropped out of nowhere?

Gamemaster:No, because you weren't being stealthy.

Scrazzy:you

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:We will begin with a spider.

Gamemaster:So, notably, what you guys walk out into is there is, of course, you walk onto a spider web, but as you look around, there is one massive spider hanging out in the corner over what appears to be a statue of some kind of humanoid.

Gamemaster:You can't get a good look because there's a massive spider in the way.

Gamemaster:But next to the spider are two other creatures in varying state of spider.

Gamemaster:One of them is like a spider centaur looking thing, almost.

Foral:And.

Gamemaster:The bottom half is entirely spider.

Gamemaster:It's a big spider.

Gamemaster:The top half is humanoid in some form, except the face is also taken on these like multi-eyed spidery aspects.

Gamemaster:And then the third creature is, it looks like maybe one step before that.

Gamemaster:They are still human.

Gamemaster:They just seem to be starting to get like some spidery bits of their face as it mutates forward.

Gamemaster:You found the life cycle of spider, as it were, hanging out in this particular temple.

Scrazzy:Level one goon versus level 100 mafia boss.

Foral:What an asshole.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah, that's exactly it.

Gamemaster:This spider sees all of you pop out of the portal.

Gamemaster:And actually, can it even reach you at this point?

Gamemaster:I don't think it can.

Foral:It sees us fall and immediately attacks.

Gamemaster:What?

Foral:It doesn't even go, wow, what's happening?

Gamemaster:No, it's a monster.

Foral:It immediately goes for gank.

Gamemaster:It's a big spider.

Gamemaster:Yes, it immediately goes for the gank.

Scrazzy:to be fair do you know any spiders this is exactly what they do something comes into their home and they just fucking attack it it's striding you don't have to say skitter you don't have to say skitter

Foral:Yeah, that's fair.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you guys have been caught in its web.

Gamemaster:Okay, so it's going to spend an action to skitter across the floor in your direction.

Gamemaster:And then... Yeah, it's striding.

Foral:It doesn't get closer?

Gamemaster:It's striding.

Gamemaster:It's skittering.

Gamemaster:I mean, that's what it's doing.

Gamemaster:And then I think it can get... With 30, it can get all of you.

Foral:That's fucked up.

Gamemaster:It doesn't get closer because it's gotten this close.

Gamemaster:And then it's going to shoot its web burst as one does.

Gamemaster:So I need all of you to attempt this reflex save, please.

Foral:Oof.

Foral:I think I should reroll this.

Scrazzy:Once per day, no asshole has made it this far.

Scrazzy:It's the end of this world.

Gamemaster:No, not... Everybody took a different route.

Gamemaster:You guys took the spider route.

Scrazzy:It's the end of the world and this reptile-brained asshole, fucking three-neuron-having, barely-evolved asshole is like food.

Scrazzy:Can't comprehend the end of the world.

Scrazzy:Bob will show him what for.

Gamemaster:It is, if you recall, you guys landed on the opposite end of the planet.

Gamemaster:This is the bit of the planet that will last the longest.

Gamemaster:So you've still got like an hour and a half before Harrow gets to this part.

Foral:All right.

Gamemaster:Anyway, we have one success, one critical success, and a failure.

Gamemaster:So just the failure, just Ozzie.

Gamemaster:You are immobilized as the web wraps onto you.

Ozzie:I'm going to use a reaction to... Iron... Oh, no, it's not close enough.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:Oh?

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Do you have a way to say no?

Ozzie:No, I don't say no, but... I don't do anything.

Ozzie:I do nothing.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:What were you trying to use?

Ozzie:Iron Command, but it's not within my champion aura.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry, it is not.

Gamemaster:That's the end of its turn, though.

Gamemaster:4-0, it's your turn.

Ozzie:the only person who doesn't want to be immobilized.

Scrazzy:Mm hmm.

Gamemaster:For what it's worth, on your turn, you can spend an action to attempt to get out of it, or somebody else can spend an action to try and free you from the webs.

Gamemaster:But for the moment, you are immobilized.

Foral:Who's turn is it?

Foral:Oh, it's mine.

Gamemaster:Yeah, it's fortals.

Foral:Apologies.

Gamemaster:I thought you were deep in thought.

Foral:Okay.

Foral:I'm gonna... Wait, how do I share this?

Foral:There we go.

Foral:This will give me, yes, I'll take damage.

Foral:But I take six damage, right?

Gamemaster:You take damage equal to twice your level.

Gamemaster:You take 12 damage.

Foral:Oh, 12.

Foral:Maybe not worth it, but it does not.

Gamemaster:If you click the use, it should do it.

Gamemaster:Or not.

Gamemaster:Just subtract 12.

Foral:30.

Gamemaster:If you right-click on your character and click minus 12, it'll do it for you.

Foral:Oh.

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Foral:Oh, no, you subtracted more.

Foral:I see.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry, when I applied the effect, it then did the minus 12.

Gamemaster:So it's just when you apply the effect, it doesn't.

Foral:Yes.

Foral:Good.

Scrazzy:Good, good.

Foral:Now let's take a shot at this thing.

Foral:And now I will take a shot.

Foral:And we will do damage.

Ozzie:This is not gonna end well.

Ozzie:That's good.

Ozzie:That'll help.

Gamemaster:Good hit.

Foral:Yes.

Gamemaster:58 points of damage does leave it bloodied.

Gamemaster:It'll attempt this fort save.

Gamemaster:It fails the fort save, so it is also stunned.

Foral:Yes.

Gamemaster:But it is still standing.

Foral:And then I will... Uh...

Foral:Can I hide?

Foral:Is that possible for me to hide?

Gamemaster:Not standing in the middle of this area, unless you have something that lets you hide in plain sight.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Otherwise, you're going to need to find something to, like, get cover behind.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:I will just... I'll just reload normally.

Gamemaster:That is allowed.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:All right, and your turn.

Foral:Uh, yes.

Gamemaster:It's Grazi's turn.

Scrazzy:How big is a 20 foot burst?

Scrazzy:That's fucking huge.

Gamemaster:It's 20 feet.

Scrazzy:Attempt the reflex save spiders.

Scrazzy:No.

Gamemaster:Oh, can you get all of the spiders?

Gamemaster:Did I just delete your thing by accident?

Ozzie:Yeah.

Gamemaster:No, I didn't.

Gamemaster:I hid it.

Gamemaster:Yeah, that does get everybody.

Scrazzy:Hit it from everyone but me.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Scrazzy:The worst gaslighting tool.

Scrazzy:I see it's on my screen.

Scrazzy:Does anyone else see?

Gamemaster:No, it's not.

Gamemaster:It's not there.

Gamemaster:What are you talking about?

Scrazzy:No, I don't see it.

Scrazzy:Are you guys fucking with me?

Scrazzy:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay, so they all need to roll dex and you need to roll damage, yeah?

Gamemaster:Sorry, not dex.

Gamemaster:We're not doing 5e anymore.

Gamemaster:Reflex.

Ozzie:My bad for last week, yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay, so one of them succeeded, one of them failed.

Gamemaster:Let's see, the evangelist failed, so he's going to take the full damage.

Foral:Oh, the spider also needs to make a 20 DC 20 save after being hit by my golden silencer.

Gamemaster:For what?

Foral:Or it is... It can't make any sounds.

Gamemaster:Wait, sorry.

Gamemaster:The silencer silences the thing it hits?

Foral:Or sonics.

Gamemaster:That's not what silencers do.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Let me just double check.

Gamemaster:One second.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Foral:It's the standard, so...

Gamemaster:Let me... Yeah, I mean, the real thing that silence sucks for is that it stops things from casting spells.

Foral:A silenced creature can't call for help or use sonic abilities nor can it use abilities with the auditory trait.

Foral:It's a fort.

Gamemaster:So that is a crazy thing to be able to just all bullets that you shoot that crit.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:One second.

Gamemaster:Let me roll a fort save for it.

Gamemaster:I rolled a natural one.

Gamemaster:It is a silent spider.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:And it's not even for critted, it's just for regular hits.

Gamemaster:All hits?

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:That's ridiculous.

Foral:Well, it doesn't Scale well, because... Oh, I thought this was... The Golden Sounds are at more uses.

Gamemaster:No.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:That's crazy.

Gamemaster:Oh, it's a consumable.

Gamemaster:It's a one-time use.

Gamemaster:No, the golden silencer is a talisman.

Gamemaster:You use it once, and then they're silenced.

Foral:Oh, I also have to use the interact action.

Gamemaster:Well, I assumed that you had affixed it previously.

Foral:It would have been used on the boulder, then.

Gamemaster:We can say it was used on the spider, that's fine.

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:But it is done now.

Foral:Okay.

Gamemaster:You have used the silencer.

Gamemaster:It's crazy to be able to just apply silence to all hits.

Foral:That makes sense.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Is that the end of your turn, Scrazzy?

Scrazzy:Uh, no.

Foral:Can you kill the big thing?

Scrazzy:Uh... Can I kill the big thing?

Foral:We're so close.

Gamemaster:The slip weird is mortal right now with that fireball.

Scrazzy:Uh, even if... Uh... Let's Bob's attack.

Scrazzy:I don't think Bob can attack.

Scrazzy:um i mean i don't have more than one spell per turn uh i'll command bob and have bobby right here what's bob's speed 25 whatever you can get there um

Scrazzy:that good they're gonna walk up all right i'll have bobby over here then that's 50 feet he's 25 each and then with my last one i will cast can i cast shield and command bob no uh yeah oh and then casting oh good hey i just can't cast it uh

Gamemaster:No.

Gamemaster:Oh, wait.

Gamemaster:Fireball is two actions brought down to one.

Gamemaster:Commanding Bob is one.

Gamemaster:And then Shield is one.

Gamemaster:You're fine.

Gamemaster:You can do that.

Scrazzy:If it were two actions, I couldn't reduce it.

Gamemaster:Right.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Scrazzy:Gotcha.

Scrazzy:All right, that's my turn.

Gamemaster:All right.

Gamemaster:Ozzie.

Gamemaster:You're immobilized.

Ozzie:Alright, so, I can make some kind of check to try and get out?

Gamemaster:Yes.

Gamemaster:If you want to try and get out, you can attempt that reflex save.

Ozzie:Ugh.

Gamemaster:Or you can attempt to free yourself, which I think is either athletics or acrobatics.

Gamemaster:Let me double check.

Ozzie:I would much rather...

Gamemaster:Escape.

Gamemaster:The escape action requires you to make an acrobatics or athletics check or an attack.

Gamemaster:can attempt an acrobatics or athletics check or use your attack modifier your unarmed attack modifier it's your choice okay unfortunately a 19 is a failure and you remain trapped

Ozzie:Do athletics.

Ozzie:Oh my god.

Ozzie:Ugh, do I just use my point to get out?

Foral:Might be worth it.

Ozzie:Yeah, I think I have to use my point to get out.

Ozzie:That's so sad.

Ozzie:Jesus.

Gamemaster:Because it's mythic, the proficiency carries you over the line.

Gamemaster:That is the success.

Ozzie:Alright.

Gamemaster:You are no longer immobilized.

Ozzie:I have two actions now.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Ozzie:So... Uh... With one action, I move to here.

Foral:Go fuck him up.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Ozzie:And then I strike.

Gamemaster:Alrighty.

Gamemaster:Make a strike.

Ozzie:Breaking the escape wasn't map, was it?

Gamemaster:It is.

Gamemaster:Escape has the attack trait.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry, it is map.

Ozzie:Alright.

Gamemaster:It's a good question.

Ozzie:I'm fair and just.

Ozzie:I hit anyway.

Ozzie:Oh.

Gamemaster:Yes, you do.

Gamemaster:He's mortal.

Gamemaster:He's not looking good.

Gamemaster:Oh, he's dead.

Ozzie:Big number.

Gamemaster:He's so dead.

Ozzie:Those are my three actions.

Foral:Hell yeah.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:It's the evangelist's turn.

Gamemaster:The evangelist gets himself a little bit back together.

Gamemaster:The burn from the fireball seems to heal a little bit.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:What is this guy's move?

Gamemaster:Can he get to you?

Gamemaster:It'll take two.

Gamemaster:Take two.

Gamemaster:So he's gonna run right up to you, Ozzie.

Ozzie:Hmm.

Gamemaster:And then he's going to take a Morningstar.

Gamemaster:And I think he's just gonna whack you with it.

Gamemaster:This guy has some weird passives.

Gamemaster:Did you know that Pain Sight is a sense in this game?

Gamemaster:Because he has it.

Scrazzy:You can tell when someone's hurt?

Gamemaster:He automatically knows if a creature is doomed, dying, or wounded.

Scrazzy:Oh.

Gamemaster:As well as the value of those conditions.

Foral:Who on our team got it?

Gamemaster:Which is just strange.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Foral:Was it Lev that got who can sense people's hit points?

Gamemaster:Yes, Lev from the Mortal Herald got something, I think, that lets him know how many hit points an enemy has, which is just a weird metagame-y thing.

Gamemaster:But Paizo liked it so much that it's a thing that necromancers could do in the last playtest.

Gamemaster:So, like... Yeah, that... Well, you know, two-thirds of infinite.

Foral:And I remembered we saw those watchers and it was just like infinite.

Foral:We're like, okay.

Gamemaster:So, do with that as you will.

Foral:Yes.

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, he misses.

Gamemaster:I mean, fortunately for you, but unfortunately for him, he misses.

Foral:Yes.

Gamemaster:And that was his third action.

Gamemaster:He ends his turn, though, and so everybody within 30 feet needs to attempt this will save.

Gamemaster:Because he's got an unnerving gaze.

Foral:I'm not going to look at him, though.

Scrazzy:He's not even looking at me.

Gamemaster:He's looking at you!

Foral:He's got to really have a weird twitch if he's looking at all of us.

Gamemaster:He's looking at all of you.

Gamemaster:He's part spider.

Ozzie:He's got spider eyeballs.

Gamemaster:He's got eight eyeballs.

Ozzie:He's got spider eyes.

Gamemaster:He could look at all of you at the same time.

Gamemaster:Okay, from his unnerving gaze, if you succeed, nothing happens.

Ozzie:I succeed!

Gamemaster:But if you fail, you are frightened too.

Ozzie:That's tough.

Foral:That's dumb.

Gamemaster:Because you are unnerved.

Ozzie:Maybe those two.

Scrazzy:means I'm not frightened to death not for long

Gamemaster:It's the aberrant's turn.

Gamemaster:What is the range on this?

Gamemaster:120 feet.

Gamemaster:You guys are within 120 feet of this man, right?

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you are.

Gamemaster:I think he's probably going to go for Ozzie, because Ozzie's taking center stage.

Gamemaster:So he's going to cast Acid Arrow at you.

Ozzie:Hmm.

Gamemaster:Did I miss?

Gamemaster:I critically failed.

Gamemaster:He gets a hero point.

Foral:No!

Foral:He's not the hero.

Gamemaster:He gets a villain point.

Foral:No!

Foral:He's just an innocent bystander.

Gamemaster:He's not the villain either.

Gamemaster:Range increment of 30 feet.

Gamemaster:You're 35 feet away.

Gamemaster:So he will step and then he's going to shoot a web at you.

Scrazzy:Attack of Bob-ertunity.

Gamemaster:You don't get to Bob-ertunity attack.

Foral:Is a web a single action?

Gamemaster:Okay, so because this was Matt, it didn't hit.

Gamemaster:So that's the end of his turn.

Foral:That's a good AC.

Gamemaster:Foral, it's your turn.

Foral:Great.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:No, Ozzie's AC is ridiculous and should be illegal.

Ozzie:That's what this whole class is about.

Foral:Yeah, that's great.

Gamemaster:I know.

Ozzie:It's the whole point.

Gamemaster:I just... At level 6, you should not have a 27 AC.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:That's just too high.

Gamemaster:Orla, it's your turn.

Ozzie:The whole point.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Gamemaster:You hit?

Foral:Great.

Foral:Sorry, let me just, what's the rules for sneak attack again?

Foral:Is this a sneak attack?

Foral:I don't think he's off.

Gamemaster:Um, it might be sneak attack.

Gamemaster:We haven't had a rogue...

Gamemaster:in the main campaign, so I just don't know rogues well enough off the top of my head.

Gamemaster:Does he have to be strike a creature that has the off-guard condition?

Foral:No, no, I think I would need.

Foral:Yeah, I don't think he is because I haven't hit him, so.

Gamemaster:Oh, yeah, no.

Gamemaster:So, no, he's not off-guard to you.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I was thinking of in 5.5e or whatever, if an ally is adjacent, you also get sneak attack.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:So that's the damage.

Gamemaster:Oh, it's persistent.

Foral:It wasn't a crit, so.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:That was for the Spider Evangelist, right?

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Oh, no.

Gamemaster:And that splash damage.

Gamemaster:Ozzie, you take one point of frost splash damage.

Foral:That's Splash?

Gamemaster:Yeah, that second one, that one is splash damage.

Foral:Oh, why is... Oh, okay.

Gamemaster:Because the elemental ammunition does splash damage in a burst where it lands.

Ozzie:Hold.

Foral:Reload, and then I will fire again.

Foral:Oh, wait, I could drop to the ground and then cover reload off the ground, right?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Probably.

Foral:Never mind, it's fine.

Foral:I think that's what I used to do with Desmond.

Gamemaster:It's okay.

Gamemaster:Covered reload is you have to either take cover or attempt to hide.

Gamemaster:You can take cover if you're prone.

Gamemaster:So yes, covered reload would allow you to do it if you're just prone.

Foral:Okay.

Foral:I remember with Desmond, if I was on the ground, I got a plus four to hit, which counteracted the minus two I got from being on the ground.

Gamemaster:Yeah, because you get a plus two.

Ozzie:You must have like had, did you have a tripod or something?

Foral:Did that happen?

Foral:Okay.

Ozzie:Or I don't know.

Foral:Okay, never mind then.

Gamemaster:It's the other way around.

Gamemaster:You get a minus two because you're flat-footed because you're prone to your AC, but then you get a plus two from cover to your AC.

Foral:Uh-huh.

Foral:Oh, so that was from the... Okay, yeah, yeah.

Gamemaster:So it's for the AC.

Gamemaster:It's not to attack.

Foral:All right.

Foral:Well, can I change my reload?

Foral:Because I didn't realize I was doing splash damage when I reloaded that.

Gamemaster:Just throws the gun.

Foral:Okay, let me... Yes, so... Oh, no!

Scrazzy:Here's.

Foral:Did I just... I didn't mean to release it!

Foral:Okay, thank you.

Foral:spider and i will take a great great that's my job

Gamemaster:Yep, 23 hits.

Gamemaster:16 more points of damage, absolutely.

Gamemaster:The evangelist is bloodied.

Gamemaster:Your fear goes down by one.

Gamemaster:This grass eats her.

Scrazzy:yes uh this crazy need to i mean he doesn't need to be able to do this so scratchy will move here he will line him up and knock him down

Gamemaster:Oh.

Gamemaster:See, the problem with any two enemies on the battlefield is that you can always draw a line between them.

Foral:Yes.

Gamemaster:Which isn't good for me.

Scrazzy:although uh actually wait a second now i want to put the i don't want to log out put the thing down yeah yeah we'll do this we'll do this we'll check yes yeah don't hide this one

Gamemaster:Log out.

Gamemaster:Drop your gun.

Gamemaster:Are they... Am I rolling reflex saves for these guys?

Gamemaster:I rolled so poorly on both of them, they both failed.

Foral:That's amazing.

Scrazzy:Perfect.

Gamemaster:They both have pretty good reflex modifiers.

Scrazzy:Yeah, and Old Man Scrazzy is frightened, too.

Foral:Oh, shit.

Gamemaster:Alright, that fully vaporizes the Spider Evangelist.

Foral:That's what he gets for trying to scare us.

Foral:Freaky little guy.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Scrazzy:And Scrazzy will take out one of the potions of healing that he brought on the last mission and dwink some.

Ozzie:Well... Yeah, unfortunately... My heavy armor makes me slow, so I need to use two actions to reach him.

Gamemaster:And it's going to be Ozzie's turn.

Scrazzy:I think that's it.

Gamemaster:Ozzie, it's just you and the aberrant now.

Gamemaster:That is unfortunate.

Ozzie:Oh, just barely, too.

Ozzie:That's so sad.

Ozzie:Alright, so it's a stride and then a step, just in case, to get the last bit.

Gamemaster:You go for it.

Ozzie:Doesn't seem to matter, and I'll just frickin' hit the guy.

Ozzie:Hopefully.

Gamemaster:That is a hit.

Ozzie:Alright.

Gamemaster:It's barely a hit, but it is a hit.

Ozzie:Let's roll some more high numbers on these D12s.

Gamemaster:That's wild.

Foral:Ooh.

Ozzie:Correct.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Scrazzy:Oof.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:He is bloodied.

Gamemaster:Nothing happens.

Gamemaster:He doesn't have a bloodied effect.

Ozzie:That's it.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Ozzie:Bring it on.

Gamemaster:It is the Abberit's turn.

Gamemaster:The Abberit has an enemy directly in front of him, so I think he kind of has to go for it.

Ozzie:Arachnid.

Gamemaster:He's going to do a three-action magic missile that is...

Ozzie:Got that.

Gamemaster:manipulate.

Gamemaster:I don't know if that's relevant to you.

Ozzie:These are just gonna deal damage to me?

Gamemaster:Yeah, it's a magic missile.

Gamemaster:Nope, that didn't roll correctly.

Gamemaster:No.

Foral:Wow, he took four damage.

Foral:All right, let's move on.

Gamemaster:No.

Scrazzy:pfft

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:So it's three missiles, and then...

Gamemaster:He heightened it so it's actually 6 missiles.

Gamemaster:So I have to roll 5d4 plus 5.

Ozzie:to add to this first four.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Ozzie:Okay.

Gamemaster:So an additional 19 points of force damage.

Ozzie:Okay.

Ozzie:Four and nineteen.

Ozzie:Upon dealing damage to me, I say, you're not going to want to do that again.

Gamemaster:Uh... Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:Okay, so there is an interesting interaction here.

Ozzie:And he can either drop prone as a free action, or he can take 2d6 mental damage.

Ozzie:It's immune to prone, huh?

Gamemaster:He's immune to prone.

Scrazzy:you

Gamemaster:So if he selects drop prone, does nothing happen?

Gamemaster:Or does he have to take refuse and take the mental damage?

Gamemaster:I think he has to refuse.

Foral:I think he has to.

Ozzie:That's up to you, Josh.

Gamemaster:No, I'm going to roll it as he has to refuse.

Ozzie:I don't know.

Ozzie:It all adds up eventually.

Gamemaster:So roll the 2d6 mental damage.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:He will take the 3 mental damage.

Gamemaster:And then...

Gamemaster:He has one action left because it was two action plus flourish for the magic missile.

Gamemaster:So I think he's just gonna attack you.

Gamemaster:He's just gonna do an attack.

Gamemaster:He's just gonna try and bite you with his fangs.

Gamemaster:I've been rolling so bad.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Floral, it's your turn.

Foral:You know what I'm going to do?

Gamemaster:No, I don't.

Foral:I'm going to cover reload.

Gamemaster:You, um...

Foral:I'm just going to... I'm already prone, I think.

Gamemaster:you throw your gun away.

Gamemaster:When you cover reload, you mean you're spending an action to drop prone, and then you're taking another action to covered reload?

Gamemaster:Or is prone free?

Gamemaster:Are you?

Gamemaster:You weren't prone last round.

Foral:I dropped prone.

Gamemaster:No.

Foral:Oh, I thought I was prone.

Foral:All right.

Foral:So never mind.

Foral:I just reload.

Gamemaster:That's why you did a regular reload last action.

Gamemaster:Because you're like, oh wait, I could have dropped prone.

Gamemaster:But dropping prone does take an additional action to do.

Gamemaster:So you won't have time to fire two shots last round.

Foral:Yes.

Foral:So I'll reload.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Foral:Then I'll take a shot.

Gamemaster:He's going to dodge this one.

Gamemaster:I've decided.

Gamemaster:He's just going to duck out of the way.

Foral:I hope he doesn't do that.

Gamemaster:He ducks.

Foral:I hope he does not do that.

Gamemaster:He just catches the bullet with his hand.

Foral:Sniper's aim.

Foral:Why is my weapon proficiency going up?

Gamemaster:Oh, he actually ducks.

Foral:That son of a bitch.

Gamemaster:Sick.

Foral:Because I'm frightened.

Gamemaster:Because you're a feared.

Gamemaster:Okay, you've spent two actions so far.

Foral:Alright, that's my turn.

Gamemaster:You reloaded.

Foral:No, I used a sniper aim.

Foral:So it was two actions.

Gamemaster:Oh, right, right, right.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:It's Scrazzy's turn.

Gamemaster:Scrazzy, you should just be friendly.

Gamemaster:There you go.

Scrazzy:Yay.

Scrazzy:Scrazzy is going to do what Scrazzy does.

Foral:I'm no longer frightened, right?

Gamemaster:Correct.

Scrazzy:How do I send this?

Gamemaster:Attack Ozzie.

Gamemaster:No?

Gamemaster:You're trying to send.

Scrazzy:Copy document UUID.

Scrazzy:I have something pulled up in a window and I can't find the send.

Gamemaster:Old Man Scrazzy is only a frightened one.

Ozzie:Old man Scrazzy should only be frightened one.

Scrazzy:He is.

Scrazzy:How do I send this?

Gamemaster:I reduced it at the start of the tortillas.

Scrazzy:I want an electric arc, but I'm pulling it up from my inventory.

Gamemaster:What are you trying to send?

Gamemaster:Oh.

Scrazzy:I'm casting it from a staff of the Tempest.

Gamemaster:In your inventory... Oh, I see.

Gamemaster:I see what you're talking about.

Gamemaster:I don't... I don't know.

Ozzie:Is it on your spells page of your character sheet?

Gamemaster:It isn't.

Scrazzy:No, it's not.

Gamemaster:Let me see if I can add it.

Ozzie:I feel like I got it to show up for Anzu somehow.

Gamemaster:I don't think so.

Scrazzy:I mean, I could just add it to my cantrips.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I mean... Oh, is it a cantrip?

Gamemaster:Which cantrip is it?

Scrazzy:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Electric Arc?

Scrazzy:Yeah, I just put it there.

Gamemaster:You do have the Electric Arc cantrip.

Scrazzy:Oh, it's already there?

Scrazzy:OK, I guess.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Scrazzy:So he's got to save.

Gamemaster:He's a very reflexive spider.

Gamemaster:I'm going to roll a 20.

Gamemaster:I rolled not a 20.

Gamemaster:He fails.

Scrazzy:kill eight points of damage okay i was gonna say and then uh command bob to uh to bother the spider and flank actually that's a good question can bob flank

Gamemaster:Luckily, everybody knows spiders are immune to electric damage.

Gamemaster:That's not true.

Gamemaster:He does take the damage.

Gamemaster:He's still standing.

Gamemaster:Can Bob do that?

Scrazzy:blanking with familiar f2e familiars can't strike and therefore are not valid for setting up a flank okay uh that's fine probably all up in there

Gamemaster:Sorry.

Gamemaster:Also, he's tiny, and tiny creatures can't fly.

Foral:That's fucked up.

Ozzie:It's just Isis.

Gamemaster:It's just true, though.

Foral:What if they're scary?

Gamemaster:Like, I... Tiny creatures are unable to flank unless it's able to use a weapon with reach or has a melee unarmed attack with reach greater than zero feet.

Foral:They should definitely be able to flank if you're scared of them.

Gamemaster:So if you figure out how to get Bob to hold a trident, then he can flank.

Scrazzy:We could just say... It's part of Bob's backstory.

Gamemaster:It's not.

Scrazzy:He holds it in his mouth.

Gamemaster:That's where he keeps his vines.

Scrazzy:That's where he keeps his mouth.

Ozzie:All right.

Foral:The real question is, does the spider have feet?

Gamemaster:Anything else?

Scrazzy:No, that's it.

Gamemaster:The spider?

Gamemaster:The spider has eight feet.

Gamemaster:It's a spider.

Scrazzy:Double damage!

Foral:Well, that other thing didn't have a feet.

Foral:The weird flying thing.

Foral:We totally could have killed it.

Gamemaster:It's true.

Gamemaster:Is that the end of your turn?

Scrazzy:Yeah.

Gamemaster:It's Ozzie's turn.

Ozzie:We're going to try to demoralize this fella.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Ozzie:I'm gonna yell out, You're nothing.

Ozzie:One time these guys had to save me from getting my chest caved in by a long-armed bugbear.

Foral:It does, unless you have the visual thing that lets you demoralize by looking.

Ozzie:And we will make a roll.

Gamemaster:Just for me, does the person you're talking to for demoralized need to speak your language?

Ozzie:I don't know.

Ozzie:Let's find out.

Gamemaster:Do you have the visual thing that lets you demoralize by looking?

Gamemaster:Because he does not speak common.

Ozzie:think I have that.

Foral:Actually, maybe you could just shout at it.

Ozzie:What does demoralize say?

Gamemaster:One second.

Gamemaster:Demoralize.

Gamemaster:If the target doesn't understand the language you're speaking, you take a minus four circumstance penalty to the check.

Ozzie:I don't think I have anything that would get around that.

Gamemaster:And make an intimidation check with a minus four circumstance penalty.

Gamemaster:Because this spider man does not speak common.

Gamemaster:Sorry, I guess man spider would be more respectful.

Foral:He doesn't speak.

Scrazzy:Man, spider.

Foral:He's illiterate.

Gamemaster:No, he does have languages.

Gamemaster:He just doesn't speak common.

Ozzie:That's what it has with the toggle switch.

Foral:He's dumb.

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, that is a critical failure.

Gamemaster:I like the reason for the minus four, though.

Gamemaster:Oh, is it?

Gamemaster:It was already there?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Ozzie:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Anything else?

Ozzie:That's one action.

Ozzie:Now I'm going to hit him.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Ozzie:Eventually.

Ozzie:Yes, Lee.

Gamemaster:Yeah, that hits.

Gamemaster:And then you're gonna roll two ones on your d12.

Foral:12, 12.

Gamemaster:It's not two ones.

Gamemaster:He's still standing.

Gamemaster:He's hanging in there.

Gamemaster:This guy has no hope of killing all of you, so I'm just hoping I get, like, one good hit on Ozzie.

Foral:Thank you.

Gamemaster:That's all I'm trying to get.

Ozzie:He's not mortal though, huh?

Gamemaster:He's not mortal.

Gamemaster:He's still standing.

Ozzie:Might as well just try to kill him.

Ozzie:That's my best bet.

Ozzie:I attack with map.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:He attacks with map.

Ozzie:Small doesn't... I don't have anything to do with the map.

Ozzie:Um, okay.

Ozzie:It's not successful.

Gamemaster:Sick.

Ozzie:I feel like it's close.

Gamemaster:Is that the end of your turn?

Ozzie:That's the end of my turn.

Gamemaster:It's the Spider Aberrant's turn.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:So he doesn't actually have any magic that he can use on you anymore.

Gamemaster:We've gone through that.

Gamemaster:So he can only try and attack.

Gamemaster:So we're going to start with a Fang attack.

Ozzie:Very well armored.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:We'll follow up with a Glaive.

Gamemaster:No, but I think he's going to run away.

Ozzie:Thank you for that.

Gamemaster:He's going to use his third action to... He's a spider.

Scrazzy:attack of opportunity oh it does i wish

Ozzie:My god, how fast is he?

Gamemaster:It's Foral's turn.

Foral:So I'm going to reload.

Gamemaster:Bob doesn't have an attack of opportunity, right?

Gamemaster:You were just saying that?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:I need to ask.

Gamemaster:I don't know what Bob could do.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Foral:Ooh, I can reload with an elemental shran now.

Foral:Yes.

Foral:And I'm fortunate for him.

Foral:I have a range increment of a.

Foral:150.

Foral:Ish.

Gamemaster:Luckily, he is a full 80 feet away.

Gamemaster:So you hit.

Gamemaster:15 is not enough to kill him.

Foral:No.

Gamemaster:He is mortal.

Gamemaster:Oh, actually.

Gamemaster:15 is enough to kill him.

Gamemaster:But next turn.

Gamemaster:Because he's at 1 HP and he has 1 persistent fire damage.

Scrazzy:We're good.

Ozzie:Hell yes.

Gamemaster:So we don't need to go through the round.

Gamemaster:On his turn, he manages to run another 35 feet and then keel over as a charred corpse.

Gamemaster:You set him on fire and that's just enough.

Gamemaster:And then he falls off this bridge.

Foral:Great.

Ozzie:See you later, stinky.

Gamemaster:And he is dead.

Gamemaster:You killed him.

Foral:Great.

Ozzie:So, do we just need to set up a beacon?

Foral:Set up a beacon.

Ozzie:I mean, all we had to do was get to the surface, right?

Gamemaster:Mm-hmm.

Scrazzy:Where?

Foral:Should we be worried about whatever the fuck's happening right there?

Ozzie:With this, like...

Gamemaster:That's the portal you came out of.

Gamemaster:That's to the slip.

Foral:Okay.

Foral:So we'll just, we'll set up a car and a beacon.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you walked out of that.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You can take out your little beacon thing, jab it into the ground, light the brazier, the flame lights.

Gamemaster:After, like, a minute or so... Why are you drawing circles?

Scrazzy:This is the beacon.

Gamemaster:After a minute or so, there is a flare of light from above you, and you all feel yourselves being transported back on the ship.

Gamemaster:now that you have formed that connection that brings you back on.

Foral:You.

Gamemaster:You're brought back onto the ship, where you get this view of the hole that gets broken in the barrier around this beam of light.

Gamemaster:And you watch as...

Gamemaster:A big chunk of tithe of the planet is hit by the beam of light, and then the beam fades, and that whole bit of tithe is just gone as it was absorbed by the ship itself.

Foral:yes did anyone else succeed okay we were the first

Gamemaster:You watch as the remnants get devoured by Harrow, although not all of it, as you have claimed some of it, before the ship pulls itself back into slipspace and escapes.

Gamemaster:you would not have stuck around long enough to check.

Gamemaster:Because when you landed, you put the beacon down, you were the first, definitely, and then a beam of light ate a third of the planet, and then the other two-thirds of the planet are being eaten by the Harrow.

Gamemaster:So even if somebody else made it onto the planet, it's just long enough to get devoured.

Ozzie:Oh, well, they'll all revive, so it's okay.

Scrazzy:Ali.

Gamemaster:They'll get rebooted.

Ozzie:So we consumed a third of the planet with our beacon?

Gamemaster:Part of the...

Gamemaster:Correct.

Ozzie:Oh, that's huge.

Ozzie:I thought it was going to be smaller than that.

Gamemaster:No, no, no, no.

Gamemaster:They needed the beacon in order to break through the barrier that prevented the ship from interacting with the surface.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:But once they did that, they could take as much as they could without actually making contact with the harrow.

Ozzie:Hmm.

Ozzie:So they really only needed one success.

Gamemaster:So...

Gamemaster:Correct.

Gamemaster:And when you come from a civilization where, like, immortality is kind of just the default, if somebody dies you can just reboot them and they maybe lose a day, the winning strategy is almost always to throw bodies at the problem and hope that one of them succeeds.

Ozzie:So every other team gets left behind.

Gamemaster:Which it worked.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Every other team gets left behind, but it's fine, because they'll get rebooted, they'll have lost a day's worth of memories, and then, you know, that's that.

Gamemaster:They're set.

Gamemaster:But you, uh... Yes, yes.

Foral:They lose their artifacts, but that's fine.

Gamemaster:But you guys came back with the artifact, and so they can spend the time to replicate it and make more, if need be, to enter into the Slipcore.

Gamemaster:But you guys succeeded.

Gamemaster:You did it.

Gamemaster:Congratulations.

Ozzie:Alright.

Foral:Great, great, great, great.

Foral:Wow, we're badass.

Foral:Good job, team.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Ozzie:Sedecium, some juice.

Gamemaster:You're slowly...

Gamemaster:Yeah, you're building up the mythos of this group, this three-person fire team as guys who get shit done.

Foral:Oh, yeah.

Gamemaster:Breaking into empty bases, taking down planets.

Gamemaster:You guys have seen the Harrow and lived.

Gamemaster:It's fine.

Gamemaster:It's great.

Foral:Yeah.

Scrazzy:There's another Tuesday for Old Man Scrazzy.

Scrazzy:And Bob.

Ozzie:Hell yeah.

Gamemaster:I absolutely offer Scrazzy and Bob and the other two people, but we don't care about them.

Foral:One last mission, you know.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:There will, like, more likely than not be another one last mission, I'm sure.

Gamemaster:If at some point, Noah can't participate again, we'll come back to this group because it seems pretty easy.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:But I will say, for the sake of if we do another one-shot with them, don't do it yet, because I don't know when it's going to happen.

Gamemaster:But eventually, you guys will be a higher level the next time we see these characters.

Ozzie:Yeah, Jorge, we discussed this while you were away.

Gamemaster:So, GG's.

Foral:Great.

Foral:Does next Monday work for you?

Gamemaster:Tanner, you have scheduling issues, right?

Gamemaster:We're doing Thursday next week, if possible.

Foral:You son of a bitch.

Gamemaster:Right?

Gamemaster:No?

Ozzie:I'm only available next Thursday.

Ozzie:If that doesn't work for you, Jorge, then probably the fair thing is to play on Monday.

Ozzie:and I won't partake, but I'm pretty sure everybody else is available on Thursday if you are, Jorge.

Scrazzy:This is.

Foral:I will have to check my calendar that Bailey keeps.

Gamemaster:It's your calendar that Bailey keeps.

Foral:Yeah, our shared calendar that she has on the fridge that I don't look at.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Foral:Unless I need to schedule.

Gamemaster:It sounds like it's Bailey's calendar, is what it is.

Foral:It is Bailey's calendar.

Ozzie:It's Bailey's calendar that happens to have some of Jorge's life on it.

Foral:Yeah, it has a lot of our shared life.

Foral:So, yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Well, let us know, and then we'll find out if we're either doing the, like, picking back up the campaign on Thursday, or we're just doing another one-shot on Monday, which both are doable.

Foral:Oh, God.

Foral:Sounds good.

Scrazzy:Sure.

Ozzie:Very well.

Foral:Man, working again sucks.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I'm sorry.

Ozzie:Yeah.

Gamemaster:It's a real shame.

Gamemaster:You should just stop.

Gamemaster:That's what I did.

Scrazzy:Yeah, your people are doing that.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:It's all the rage nowadays.

Ozzie:Hmm.

Foral:Sorry again about that.

Gamemaster:It's fine.

Foral:What?

Gamemaster:It is really fine.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Did they give any reasoning why?

Foral:Do they say tokens in AI to get more stock?

Gamemaster:So...

Gamemaster:No, no, no, no, no.

Scrazzy:Thank you.

Gamemaster:We were in such a weird place.

Gamemaster:Basically, when the... I used to work at a different sports betting company.

Gamemaster:And, like, two years ago, we got Aqua hired.

Foral:Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:And so they effectively purchased the entire engineering team and brought them on.

Gamemaster:And, like, we fully expected to be integrated with the existing group of engineers that they had.

Foral:Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:And that just fully never happened.

Gamemaster:So we were an entirely separate engineering team working on our own projects.

Foral:Oh, totally aqua hiring, yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah, so I don't know why they would do that.

Foral:What's the point of merging the talent that you bought?

Gamemaster:Either way.

Gamemaster:So we worked on our own stuff up until January of this year where they said, hey, you know that project that you had been working on for like the past year that we set up, the most recent one?

Gamemaster:We didn't like that you guys were writing it instead of the other team.

Gamemaster:So we had the other team completely rewrite it.

Gamemaster:So you don't have to work on that anymore.

Gamemaster:And then they merged all of them onto the team that I was working on because I wasn't part of the thing that they recreated.

Gamemaster:I had been working on the pricing engine for the whole time.

Gamemaster:And they said, now all of the engineers are on the pricing engine.

Gamemaster:You're all doing pricing engine stuff.

Gamemaster:And then we said, what are we pricing?

Gamemaster:If you got rid of the project that the other engineers were working on.

Gamemaster:And they said, we'll figure it out.

Gamemaster:And then I guess it took until April for them to figure out that they had no reason to just have a pricing engine that wasn't pricing anything.

Ozzie:Oh.

Gamemaster:And they didn't want to spend the dev hours to integrate it into the app.

Gamemaster:So they said, we're going a different direction.

Gamemaster:We're not doing this long-term strategy thing anymore.

Gamemaster:And they just laid off all of us.

Gamemaster:I was working there two years, so I got, like, reasonable severance and stuff.

Gamemaster:It's fine.

Gamemaster:We had recently hired people, like, at the start of the year, and they got nothing.

Foral:Like your manager, right?

Gamemaster:So, yeah, my manager started January, like, 2nd or something like that, and he got absolutely nothing.

Gamemaster:But I don't even know what his reaction was, because he was on vacation when they let go of us.

Foral:Oh, gosh.

Gamemaster:There were three people on the team that were on vacation that day that I imagine they all just got an email that said, see you later, suckers.

Gamemaster:And then...

Foral:So how do they break the news to you?

Gamemaster:We got a meeting put on our calendar called Org Restructure at 9 a.m.

Gamemaster:That was the, like, listed participants were CEO, HR, participants hidden.

Gamemaster:Uh, so like, it was pretty obvious from that invite, what was happening.

Gamemaster:Uh, we just go in there.

Gamemaster:Like it was, the whole meeting was literally like a minute and a half long.

Gamemaster:They're like, Hey, company's going in a different direction.

Gamemaster:We'll send you an email with more information.

Gamemaster:It's been great working with you.

Gamemaster:Uh, and then they cut off our email accounts.

Foral:That's crazy.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Just let us loose.

Foral:Also, some people might have been crazy if you slept through that meeting.

Gamemaster:some people don't get in until 10.

Gamemaster:Like, it was fully only, of the, like, 12 of us that are on the team, I think only, like, 7 or 8 were actually in the meeting.

Gamemaster:The rest were either on vacation or just didn't attend or whatever.

Gamemaster:So.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Ozzie:Well, you can read the book.

Gamemaster:It's fine.

Ozzie:Maybe it's time for you to become an author as well.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I'm going to read the book.

Gamemaster:Maybe I'll become an author.

Gamemaster:I'll start looking for a job at some point relatively soon.

Gamemaster:I just, you know, I'm taking a little bit of a break because I can.

Foral:Yeah, I think that's very reasonable.

Scrazzy:you

Ozzie:Well earned.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I just, I remember when I, when I like quit Jade Street without a backup effectively.

Gamemaster:And I went some time without a job and I started to go a little bit stir crazy and I don't want to replicate that.

Gamemaster:So I'm going to start looking sooner rather than later.

Gamemaster:But I figured, you know, I could take a week or something before I start looking, like, seriously.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:Would you ever go to Jane Street again?

Gamemaster:No.

Gamemaster:Like it was stressful to the point of being unhealthy for me.

Gamemaster:I would not want to recreate that.

Gamemaster:I like, I might go into finance again, but like on a FinTech startup-y side, I don't think I want to go into full finance.

Foral:Yeah, that's fair.

Gamemaster:I just, I don't think I have the temperament for that kind of environment, knowing myself.

Gamemaster:Like they'd pay me a bunch of money, but it'd ruin everything else.

Gamemaster:And I just, I don't need that.

Foral:And you'd also need to go back in the office too, I'm assuming.

Gamemaster:I don't mind going back in the office.

Gamemaster:I've been remote the past three years, effectively.

Gamemaster:I wouldn't mind, at the very least, a hybrid, being able to go in the office for a few days.

Gamemaster:There is something to be said about being around other people a little bit.

Foral:Yeah.

Gamemaster:see I'm not picky enough about it to like only select a job that's that's hybrid or something like if I get a remote offer or whatever I'll take it but like that is a pro yeah I mean especially for companies that have like real estate in the city because I am I am looking in New York primarily I'm not moving anywhere I own this apartment I'm not selling it to go somewhere else um

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:I think a lot of jobs are hybrid now, so or yeah.

Gamemaster:And I imagine if you have real estate in New York, you want to justify having real estate in New York.

Gamemaster:So you're looking for at least a hybrid situation.

Foral:Yeah.

Scrazzy:Well, if you want to yell to people in London for shoehorning Rust into what would otherwise be a perfectly reasonable Python and C++ pipeline, my team.

Gamemaster:I would not at all yell at them about that.

Gamemaster:That sounds like a pretty good decision.

Scrazzy:They have to do so much bullshit to get Rust into this.

Foral:Yeah.

Foral:I

Gamemaster:Do they?

Gamemaster:To get bindings and stuff set up for whatever?

Scrazzy:No, no, no, no, no.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Scrazzy:So we're using a client from the market data team, which everyone hates.

Scrazzy:Don't work on the market data team if you go to BAM.

Scrazzy:Just straight up, they're not good and they're mad about it.

Foral:Thank you.

Scrazzy:But their client for listening to their feed for taking options data is written in C++.

Scrazzy:And for some reason, the lead on this project in London and everyone in London has agreed that Rust is a superior language to be writing this in.

Scrazzy:So they're writing the entire framework for processing streams

Scrazzy:like streamed events in Rust.

Scrazzy:And as a result of that, the client, they can't have just a client running C++ outputting the Kafka to the Rust process because Kafka is not good for all of that data.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Scrazzy:It just, they've tried it and it doesn't work.

Scrazzy:So they're going to use like some IPC channel between the C++ client and Rust

Scrazzy:in the same Kubernetes deployment with sidecar, like, instead of just writing one monolith in C++ that does the client and the...

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:that doesn't need any interprocess communication at all, why, at the very least, why wouldn't you look at binding the library into the Rust binary and then still have it?

Foral:do some ABI so you don't have to do it.

Gamemaster:I don't know why you would introduce interprocess communication there for no reason.

Scrazzy:Great question.

Scrazzy:Lots of good questions.

Gamemaster:That's wild.

Scrazzy:They also like a lot of visibility APIs.

Scrazzy:So part of the fact that there will be this C++ extractor and then whatever logic they have running in Rust, the inter-process communication, you'll be able to access what's happening, like the data that's being passed via an API.

Scrazzy:You'll be able to check ingresses to the Rust for live debugging.

Gamemaster:But you wouldn't need that if you just didn't do any process communication in the first place.

Scrazzy:Yeah, or just log.

Scrazzy:You can always just log what's happening.

Gamemaster:No, no, no, no.

Scrazzy:It's called that for a reason.

Gamemaster:I want to be able to feed it into Datadog or whatever so that I know.

Gamemaster:I want it to be pushed.

Scrazzy:The logs, logging is, I write logs and I'm like, I don't think these exist in any other process.

Scrazzy:They like to just have a web server running on the process and then hit the endpoints to debug, which it's nice, but the logs are cool too.

Gamemaster:Easy.

Gamemaster:Nobody reads logs nowadays.

Foral:That's wild.

Gamemaster:Jane Street worked entirely off of logs.

Gamemaster:Like 100% logging in that our logging system was effectively a really, really sophisticated version of Cat over SSH into looking at stuff.

Gamemaster:And that worked fine.

Gamemaster:They moved plenty of money around working entirely off of logs.

Scrazzy:i like i i really like logs when they're done correctly and not too voluminously or if they are voluminous you can write something that reads the logs yeah yes sure

Gamemaster:You just have, you just grep.

Gamemaster:You just use grep and it's done.

Foral:All right.

Gamemaster:Either way, thank you all for playing with me.

Gamemaster:See most of you at least next week.

Gamemaster:Probably.

Foral:Yep.

Ozzie:Peace.

Foral:That is.

Gamemaster:See ya.

Scrazzy:Peace.