2025-12-23 — Akasha

Arctos:Howdy.

Johnny:Yo, yo, yo.

Johnny:Good.

Arctos:Hello.

Gamemaster:I purposefully didn't mention anybody in my complaining it's you know it's anonymous

Johnny:Yeah, I did.

Arctos:Did you send your character sheet on time?

Johnny:I think I sent mine four days ago.

Arctos:Me too.

Arctos:I know.

Arctos:Neither Noah or I did it, Tanner.

Anzu:Oh.

Arctos:Yeah!

Anzu:So we do know.

Johnny:It's fully anonymous.

Gamemaster:It's anonymous!

Johnny:It's fully anonymous.

Anzu:Boo, Michael.

Anzu:Boo.

Johnny:Not a whole lot of people.

Johnny:Oh, we laughed.

Anzu:Let's go.

Gamemaster:Oh, you booed him out!

Johnny:We bullied him out.

Johnny:It finally happened.

Arctos:I honestly...

Benny:Why did this have a scary sound?

Gamemaster:What?

Benny:Why did it have a scary sound when I joined?

Johnny:Sound of us bullying you?

Gamemaster:It didn't...

Benny:It did.

Gamemaster:great you've killed him either way it's fine I got

Benny:There it is again, the spooky sound.

Arctos:Mike, is your hair wet?

Benny:no i stayed i stayed home because i'm sick so i've been wearing these headphones the whole day and if i wear these instead of letting my hair dry it just stays flat it it 100 does it's okay

Anzu:well I'm sorry you're unwell

Gamemaster:There was an explanation.

Arctos:It didn't look cut.

Arctos:It just looked actually wet, so I'm glad it cut.

Johnny:Your hair looking super condensed.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Are you well enough to be talking for some span of three to four hours?

Benny:Yeah, it's like I was okay, and then I wasn't.

Benny:I was like, okay, you know?

Arctos:The flu and norovirus are both going around.

Arctos:I know Bailey's mom works at a school and 80 kids called out sick with the flu on Friday.

Benny:I have some... Well, I mean... I don't think this is...

Johnny:Oh yeah.

Anzu:Oh damn.

Gamemaster:I mean, that shouldn't impact all of us because we all got our flu shots, right?

Arctos:Yeah, they missed the flu this year.

Arctos:I heard the flu shot missed the viral flu this year.

Johnny:Daisy got her flu shot and she still got the current string.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:She was out.

Gamemaster:No.

Arctos:It's all a guess with secret chicken farms.

Johnny:Well, I don't know about you guys, me and Josh were at the Zionist cabal, and we actually agreed to release this strain.

Arctos:Ah, okay.

Gamemaster:That's true.

Benny:Yeah, this is why Josh is pressuring us to get shots.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Anzu:you you you

Benny:He's like, they've got the new mRNA flu shots that are really good.

Gamemaster:Exactly.

Gamemaster:If you see anything that looks like a microchip, it's not.

Arctos:There's no microchip.

Benny:If the weather in your neighborhood changes rapidly and you feel like the back of your head heating up, don't worry about it.

Gamemaster:That's the vaccine.

Gamemaster:Get two.

Arctos:I saw confusion.

Arctos:Josh, you know how they make the flu vaccine?

Gamemaster:I...

Arctos:So they guess, and then they grow it in chickens and chicken eggs in secret farms across the U.S.

Arctos:because it would be a security hazard if people found out which one's making it.

Gamemaster:Okay, you said shady before, and shady and secret are not the same thing.

Arctos:It's the same thing.

Benny:Very close.

Benny:I actually, I started, no.

Gamemaster:It's like a well-documented process.

Arctos:Could you imagine if you had like a chicken farm near you and then one year they're like, you're not allowed on the property.

Benny:They're alive.

Johnny:Wait, so you would be trespassing on this person's chicken farm?

Arctos:And you're like, what?

Arctos:What's going on?

Gamemaster:Out of curiosity, how frequently are you wandering onto random chicken farms around that you would notice if suddenly you weren't allowed onto a particular chicken farm?

Benny:No, no.

Arctos:If I had a neighbor chicken farm all the time, if I live close to one.

Benny:He's a vaccine hunter.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Constantly.

Arctos:Making sure they're treating them well.

Gamemaster:Just in case.

Benny:How else do you get onto a chicken farm?

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:Surprise.

Benny:They don't let you on there normally.

Gamemaster:Why are you trying to get on the chicken farm?

Benny:But shady and secret apparently have a lot closer meaning.

Benny:I saw a post that was recommended to me on Reddit today for a subreddit called Sketchy Watches.

Benny:And...

Benny:I clicked on it, not because it says Sketchy Watches, but because it was a guy with, like, a glow-in-the-dark, like, whatever, glow-in-the-dark dial and shit.

Benny:And I was like, oh, nice.

Benny:And I, like, zoomed out.

Benny:And he has a sniper rifle aimed at an intersection.

Benny:And I'm like, excuse me?

Benny:And I'm like, what do you mean sketchy?

Arctos:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Of course.

Benny:The watch is fine.

Benny:The guy is sketchy.

Benny:So I go to the comments and someone's just like, God, I hope you're police.

Benny:And then someone says, based on his post history and this post, he is.

Benny:And I'm like, what the fuck is this subreddit?

Benny:So I click sketchy watches refers to people that used to be special operators having watches because they call themselves sketchy.

Benny:I saw one guy calling himself his former CIA spook here, and he's got a bunch of CIA medallions and his watch.

Benny:I'm like, Jesus Christ, man.

Gamemaster:That's such a weird niche for a subreddit to have evolved into.

Arctos:Did this happen today?

Benny:Oh, my God.

Benny:This happened today, yeah.

Arctos:I got pushed today on Reddit, r slash darknet, and the post they pushed was, what's the most amount of money you've made or lost in a day?

Johnny:up.

Arctos:And it was a bunch of people confessing or lying about crimes.

Arctos:Half of them were like, I'd serve my time, and the other half were like, I was buying a lot of stuff on the OG Silk Road.

Arctos:Don't ask me what.

Arctos:And I'm like,

Arctos:What?

Arctos:Just... Why are you guys here?

Arctos:Why is this... I don't want to be part of this.

Gamemaster:It kind of sounds like a bunch of LARPers.

Gamemaster:I have to imagine that if you're doing any appreciable amount of business on the dark web, you could use one of many forums that do exist, like the unindexed part of the internet.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:You wouldn't just go onto Reddit and talk about it.

Arctos:I will say...

Arctos:I also saw a Reddit post about a guy to r slash hacking, which I'm also not a part of.

Arctos:And it was a guy saying, I'm 25 years old and I have no computer skills, but I'm ready to devote myself to becoming a hacker.

Arctos:I actually am paraplegic and lost my thumb.

Arctos:And there's like this whole thing about he'll do whatever it takes.

Arctos:What should he do?

Arctos:And the comments are like, I don't know, learn tech.

Arctos:And they're like,

Arctos:What's the best way to learn it?

Benny:Data structures and algorithms.

Arctos:And they start downvoting him.

Arctos:They're like, if you are a hacker, you have to learn how to find permission yourself.

Arctos:And I'm like, this is cringe.

Gamemaster:Thank you.

Arctos:I don't want to be a part of this.

Johnny:Every part of that is bad.

Benny:Give him cracking the coding interview.

Benny:Read this entire PDF and you'll become a hacker.

Benny:I saw another one.

Benny:I'm glad that, I don't know, probably 50% of the posts on Reddit are fake.

Benny:So I'm glad that I'm picking up because I was scrolling and another one that was recommended to me is something that's called like option selling millionaires or something or like option sellers, R slash option sellers probably.

Benny:And I'm like, for people not to know, option selling is something that is sold to people as a way to make quote unquote passive income.

Benny:But what you essentially do is you sell options.

Benny:that have you losing 10 times the money you put in on a tail event.

Benny:Or no, losing all the money you put in on a tail event.

Benny:But 99% of the time, they return 15% annually if the stocks are going up.

Benny:There's no point in doing it at all.

Benny:So for a whole subreddit, these people are like, I've been selling options for three months.

Benny:I'm up 20% already.

Benny:I'm beating the S&P 500.

Benny:And it's like,

Benny:You're literally picking up pennies in front of a steamroller.

Benny:And some guy made a post like, hit my net worth goal, $5 million.

Benny:I'm stopping running all my strategies.

Benny:And I'm quitting my job on Monday.

Benny:And I'm reading this.

Benny:I'm like, 100% bullshit.

Benny:100% bullshit because no one with $5 million is selling options.

Benny:And no one gets to $5 million selling options.

Benny:I'm calling immediate bullshit.

Benny:I start scrolling.

Benny:He's retiring all my strategies.

Benny:I go to his post history.

Benny:One post.

Benny:Okay.

Benny:Go to his comments.

Benny:One comment.

Benny:Oh, if you're interested, I can DM you.

Benny:I click on it.

Benny:He's replying to a comment that says, if you're retiring your trading strategies, can you let us know some?

Benny:And he's like, I'll DM all of you individually.

Gamemaster:I assume he's just selling bad strategies is what's happening.

Benny:I'm like, we got him.

Benny:We got him.

Benny:I felt very proud that I was like, oh, yeah.

Benny:Oh, no, no, no.

Benny:He's probably selling managed accounts.

Benny:which is a scam where you put money into an offshore managed account.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Benny:They fudge the numbers and tell you that you're making 20% a week.

Arctos:Or it's the ones hedge funds give you where they're like, here, pretend.

Benny:When you try to withdraw, it's almost impossible and they just keep your money.

Gamemaster:What do you mean scam?

Gamemaster:I've been putting like a quarter of my paycheck into one of those.

Gamemaster:It's fine.

Johnny:I appreciate you still hanging out with us.

Gamemaster:They have this nice little web interface.

Gamemaster:I'm a trillionaire now.

Benny:What did you say, Jorge?

Arctos:Aside from the other thing, I will also say I have taken part in several Wall Street bets

Arctos:this stock's going to the moon and it does for like a day and then it gets scrubbed from wall street bets so you have to buy it and leave it is crazy how often that happens but like the mods are so careful not to let any like game stop thing happen again and it's like when i'm looking at this thing there's like a post where it's like this is gonna 10x in seven months and i'm like it's definitely not but it will go up 10 to 15 percent in the next 24 hours so i'll

Benny:I would definitely try that if I did not have to report every breath I take financially.

Johnny:Fair.

Arctos:Take that.

Arctos:Get out.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:But another call out.

Arctos:This one I did find there, but it actually is a long-term one.

Arctos:Five?

Arctos:Five below for some reason?

Arctos:Really good stock.

Johnny:I bought some of their stock today.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:They've had great, great stuff this year.

Arctos:When there's like independent, like if you have like Fidelity or something like that, there's like an independent score from like seven different brokerages or like finance people and has like a 9.4 out of 10 on bullish rating.

Arctos:Yeah, apparently they've done some expansion.

Arctos:There's probably going to have a good Q4.

Arctos:Stock's been going up.

Arctos:This is not stock trading advice.

Arctos:I'm not doing stock trading advice.

Gamemaster:He just bought 3% to 5% below and wants all of you guys to raise the price for him by buying.

Johnny:Jorge texted me this and then right after that texted me a brokerage disclosure being like, this is not brokerage advice.

Johnny:I'm not a licensed broker.

Arctos:No, I've been told to do that since I was an intern at a brokerage company.

Benny:Did you ask Gemini to make that?

Benny:Oh, nice.

Johnny:I think I have to do that if I give any of you real estate advice in the state of Colorado.

Arctos:Great, great market.

Benny:So when we're like, there's a really nice house down the street, you're like, yeah.

Arctos:Looks like it's going to be a... You can get it for a song.

Benny:Actually, hold on.

Benny:Can you sign this before I say anything about the house down the street?

Gamemaster:Thank you.

Johnny:Yeah, pretty much.

Johnny:Pretty much.

Johnny:Otherwise, I can get sued.

Johnny:In the state of Colorado, specifically.

Benny:Do you have some sort of licensing?

Johnny:Yeah, I'm technically a licensed broker, but I only do it so that I can... I don't really do a lot of brokerage.

Arctos:I assume you're also licensed real estate agents too.

Johnny:I just do it so that other brokers don't get an entire fee when we buy and sell from them.

Johnny:Which is kind of a dick move, but also...

Benny:I mean, I think it's... It doesn't feel like that much of a...

Johnny:Broker and agent's the same thing.

Arctos:Oh, cool.

Benny:You're just preventing them from getting lists in sale.

Johnny:Now, basically how it works is we do mostly commercial stuff.

Johnny:So we have a lot of brokers who will like bring us a deal.

Johnny:And then depending on how nice they've been in the past two years, we'll be like, actually, we're licensed brokers too.

Johnny:And we're representing our own company.

Johnny:So we'll split the fee on this.

Gamemaster:Oh fuck.

Benny:I feel like that's got to be partially on them.

Benny:If I'm approaching a commercial...

Benny:real estate company.

Benny:I have to imagine that someone somewhere on staff can handle the other end of the deal.

Johnny:Yeah.

Benny:You just got to know that you're taking a risk.

Benny:Like, I don't know, maybe they'll just cut me out.

Johnny:We do.

Johnny:I mean, we have good relationships with the brokers that we work with, so they know what they're doing.

Johnny:They know what's happening.

Benny:It's also like one of the highest fees for an asset is real estate.

Johnny:It is a stunningly high fee.

Johnny:I know a couple of brokers who are in their 60s, and they'll do two deals a year, and they're living fine.

Benny:was a very common uh housewife career uh for quite some time and with lots of rising housing prices people were completely okay because new york state was three and three uh so it was six percent commissions on every sale to just the agents involved um so yeah i mean they wouldn't people would make like ten thousand dollars a year but

Benny:It's honestly a fun thing to have as a hobby because you go and do the classes, which I don't know how much it costs, maybe $800 total in New York State or something or less.

Benny:And then you just get to walk into nice houses if you are the wife of a guy that's very rich or a rich family.

Benny:And they're like, oh, I don't know.

Benny:Janie has a real estate license.

Benny:Let her sell the house.

Benny:So then she can try to sell the house.

Benny:You just walk into nice houses week in and week out.

Benny:My mom knew lots and lots of these women.

Johnny:I do entirely commercial real estate.

Johnny:I don't buy or sell houses.

Johnny:I don't help brokerage for it because I don't like residential.

Johnny:But if there's a nice house that isn't like the neighborhood that we'll walk by and it's like for sale, I will call and be like, I'd like to arrange a tour of this house for my client.

Johnny:And it's 100% just me and Daisy taking a tour of this house.

Gamemaster:Mm-hmm.

Benny:One final thing on this.

Benny:I had a teacher that was particularly adept at personal finance in high school.

Benny:He retired early.

Benny:He was a stats and calc teacher.

Benny:And one of the things he said, he just got on a rant one day in class.

Benny:He's just like, real estate agents, it's the craziest profession.

Benny:They don't do any work and they get 6% of every sale.

Benny:And I'm like, yeah, so my mom's a real estate agent.

Benny:He's just like,

Benny:Yeah, so the commissions are high.

Benny:He was like, I'm sorry, but the commissions are way too high for they don't do enough.

Gamemaster:Thank you.

Benny:I'm like, I don't know.

Arctos:What's also crazy is a good real estate agent, like the one we have right now, is great.

Benny:She works quite a lot.

Arctos:We've met her, and there's a nice older guy that was selling it, that seller's agent, and he leaves and works at the same company, and she was just like,

Arctos:He's really nice, but I can gut him in a negotiation.

Arctos:He has no idea how to price in this market.

Arctos:It's just like, holy shit.

Arctos:And then other people, he's like, she's like, I've never met this woman before in my life, but my friend Nancy knows her.

Arctos:And then they show up and they like hug each other.

Arctos:And then she's like getting us like backwater conversations with the seller's agent.

Arctos:And I'm like, great.

Arctos:Yeah, no, you're great.

Arctos:You're one of the cabal socket moms.

Arctos:And I get why I'm going to give you this 3%.

Arctos:You can find us this house.

Arctos:She finds us houses that aren't on the market.

Johnny:Listen, in every state, there's like a real estate cabal for commercial or residential.

Arctos:They're like shitty videos on iPhones.

Arctos:It's like, great.

Arctos:That's what I want.

Benny:When my dad – well, of course.

Johnny:There's different cabals.

Johnny:And if you know the people in it, it's awesome.

Johnny:And if you don't, it sucks.

Johnny:I'm in the cabal.

Benny:No, I'm joking.

Benny:When my dad bought a house in Florida, he put that poor man through hell.

Benny:He earned his 3%.

Benny:He had him show him, I think, 210 houses or something.

Benny:Yeah.

Benny:He was looking for a year.

Benny:No joke.

Gamemaster:Where was he living for the year?

Benny:He keeps trying.

Benny:He was living in an apartment.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:He was like, this is my year where I'm going to go around looking at houses until I find one that is literally perfect.

Gamemaster:And I guess he found one because he moved.

Benny:Yep.

Arctos:Well, do you guys remember the secretary problem from computer science?

Gamemaster:Nice.

Benny:Bye.

Arctos:Where it's, you should basically, let's say you have a hundred secretaries.

Arctos:You're interviewing for a position for secretary.

Arctos:And I guess this is how it is.

Arctos:Let's say you're willing to look at 200 houses.

Arctos:You should note everyone and then 30% through, like through your way, you should go, what was the best secretary I saw?

Arctos:Well, it's too late because she already left.

Arctos:But then you go, all right, anyone who's as good as her or better, I'm getting the second I see them.

Arctos:And then for the rest of the houses or thing, you look at it.

Arctos:So maybe your dad had like a, I don't know, 600 house threshold.

Arctos:And he actually found it on his 30% or something.

Arctos:Maybe he had a 300 and he found it on 30 and was like, I need to weigh another 100 houses before I see this again.

Johnny:He had to know he wanted to have every data point possible.

Benny:He was looking in such a specific area of Tampa that I can't, I have to imagine he saw every single house that went on sale in that area.

Gamemaster:Ha ha ha.

Benny:I mean, like, he's like, yeah, he earned his commission.

Benny:Yeah, he definitely did.

Benny:You annoyed the fuck out of him for a year.

Benny:I would pinch myself if you finally bought.

Benny:I'd be like, what the fuck?

Benny:Actually, I didn't think we would ever get out of this nightmare.

Gamemaster:I'm legitimately surprised that like a hundred viewings in this guy wasn't just like, it's not worth my time to keep showing houses and drop him as a client.

Johnny:Thank you.

Benny:So it was not the first agent he had.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:Hmm.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:This is the one that showed him 100 because it was the one that would show him 100.

Arctos:I know.

Arctos:You need to break the contract.

Benny:The other people would never get to 100.

Anzu:Thank you.

Benny:He had some woman.

Benny:I don't even know if she stopped or he stopped, and then he had some other guy.

Johnny:Wait, that implies that every single one should go to the same list.

Arctos:See if it's not a contract.

Johnny:That implies that every single one, he was like, I got to see how many they'll show me.

Johnny:And he was like, we're starting at number one, and then we're going up from that house.

Gamemaster:you

Benny:No, because there was a decent amount of turnover because this was post-COVID.

Benny:This was during COVID.

Benny:He was looking.

Benny:So interest rates low.

Benny:There was a lot of turnover.

Benny:So he would see it.

Benny:He would hesitate.

Benny:And then his agent would be like, yeah, it's gone.

Benny:He's like, that's fine.

Benny:We'll keep looking.

Benny:And just kept looking.

Arctos:I know for us, we basically are like, we kind of want to live in Rockville Center or Garden City.

Arctos:And we just want a nice house.

Arctos:We're not going to go to a shitty one.

Arctos:We're not pressed.

Arctos:We'll just wait it out.

Arctos:So at least we're not taking their time.

Arctos:But I'm sure at a certain point, she's going to be like, guys, this house might not show up.

Arctos:And we're like, we saw one.

Arctos:It was great.

Arctos:It was a beautiful house.

Arctos:It was the first one we saw.

Benny:Show me the data.

Benny:Show me that is a one in a hundred year house, and I will take the next one you give us.

Benny:Otherwise, we're holding out hope.

Gamemaster:One.

Arctos:I'll wait 100 years.

Arctos:I saw one of the most beautiful houses I've ever seen.

Arctos:Two problems.

Arctos:85-minute train ride.

Arctos:$10 million.

Arctos:One of those problems is worse than the other, but it's a really nice house.

Johnny:Do you guys know Smashburger?

Johnny:Is that a thing in New York?

Benny:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Johnny:So in high school, my friend, his dad started Smashburger.

Johnny:And so I went over to his house once and I got lost in it.

Arctos:Yeah, you told me about this.

Gamemaster:Nice.

Johnny:It was so large.

Johnny:I got lost in it for so long.

Arctos:You know, you have given me a life goal.

Anzu:That's crazy.

Johnny:You have a house that big.

Arctos:If I ever have some good company and exits for like $100 million, they'll be like, Jorge, why are you continuing to work?

Arctos:I'm like, I need a house.

Arctos:So big.

Arctos:That if I have a kid and they have a friend, they could get lost.

Johnny:Jorge, have you considered selling options?

Johnny:I've heard it's a good way to make money.

Benny:Yeah, this house is absolutely retarded.

Anzu:Easy five mil.

Arctos:Easy.

Arctos:That's a crazy house, right?

Benny:Yeah, no, this is dumb as fuck.

Arctos:Yeah, no, it's crazy.

Benny:You know what's crazy?

Arctos:It is.

Benny:This is better bang for buck than I was going to point out a house that's probably more than $10 million.

Benny:Do you guys remember the house that I found that was on...

Benny:What's the name of it?

Benny:It was like a very specific hill in Brookline.

Benny:And this... What?

Arctos:Oh, yeah.

Johnny:Hamburger Hill.

Benny:No, it was definitely not... Fisher Hill.

Gamemaster:Ooh, that's a steal.

Benny:It's this house near the top of Fisher Hill that was $10 million when we were in college.

Arctos:I also... Oh, like 20.

Benny:It was smaller than this house.

Arctos:I sent a much more modest one after that.

Benny:It has to be.

Benny:And...

Arctos:I still can't afford it, but it's much more modest.

Johnny:This is nice.

Benny:Wow.

Benny:It was listed for 10.5 while we were in college.

Benny:It's now 7.7.

Benny:So just give me a bit of time.

Arctos:Oh, something happened.

Benny:I can put some money together.

Benny:I can figure something out here.

Benny:This thing is absolutely crazy.

Benny:I think it was designed... I mean, the guy who built it is a...

Benny:pilot and the founder of a cloud storage company and like every bedroom has two stories or like most bedrooms have two stories like there is there is like literally 20 foot ceilings in every bedroom and there is a staircase up to the second floor that just has like a bookshelf and a desk and a bathroom and the bottom floor is just for the bed

Gamemaster:I hate this.

Johnny:Oh

Arctos:What's so funny about this house, though, was it was originally sold in 94 for 2 million.

Gamemaster:If you look at picture 18 on that listing, it looks like an M.C.

Gamemaster:Escher painting.

Gamemaster:I hate it so much.

Anzu:I'm seeing that, yeah

Benny:Oh, the staircase?

Benny:Yeah, the suspended staircase.

Benny:Yeah, every bedroom has fucking two stories.

Benny:It's got a crazy office.

Benny:They have a fucking...

Arctos:Then they sold in 2016 for 12.

Arctos:And then they were unable to sell it until it went back to $7 million.

Johnny:Eh, probably about it.

Arctos:That $12 million really overpaid.

Benny:I think I have a difficult time mentally thinking that $8 million is in any way a bargain for a residential property.

Benny:It definitely is here, I guess, because it's less than the last person paid.

Benny:But... Bro, who... You have to...

Gamemaster:That doesn't make it a bargain.

Gamemaster:That just means the last person overpaid.

Arctos:Nope, it's not.

Arctos:It's not less than the last person.

Arctos:They tried selling it for $10.

Arctos:Then they couldn't sell it until someone paid $7.

Arctos:And now the $7 is trying to sell it for $9.

Benny:Oh shit, it did sell.

Arctos:Great.

Benny:It sold less than six months ago.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:What's wrong with this place?

Arctos:Yeah, yeah.

Gamemaster:Well, I mean, it's possible they purchased it and then just wanted to flip it.

Arctos:So what's funny is it's probably less... Go ahead.

Johnny:Fix and flips are an evil eating the housing economy.

Benny:You know what?

Benny:They probably could have.

Gamemaster:Like, why else would you buy it and then put it on the market two months later?

Arctos:Nope.

Benny:Like...

Arctos:I hate it too.

Johnny:I have a big issue with fix and flips.

Arctos:And it's so funny that someone had it listed at $12.8 million, couldn't sell it for nine years.

Arctos:The guy who bought it for $7 million is like, great.

Arctos:He was an idiot.

Arctos:I could sell it.

Arctos:I'll buy it and flip it.

Benny:I do like that.

Arctos:And then he's not.

Benny:I like imagining these people in pain.

Arctos:It's not succeeding.

Arctos:I hope it doesn't reform.

Benny:Because, I don't know, like, bro, who the fuck is going to buy this?

Benny:Like, I get it's Boston, but, like, you got to have, like, a list of, like, 50 people that are, like, that you can get publicly available.

Benny:Otherwise, you have to, like, take out ads and Instagram feeds for people that follow, like, watch dealers.

Benny:Like, who the hell else are you going to try to market this to?

Benny:Do you know what I mean?

Benny:Like, you can't just put up a fucking...

Benny:You cannot have an open house for this.

Benny:You're going to get people hiding in here.

Arctos:It's got to be a nightmare.

Benny:Like, if I saw an open house for $7 million, I would be like, yeah, so I'm actually an heir.

Benny:Yeah, no, I know.

Benny:I look young.

Benny:Let me in.

Johnny:No, dude.

Arctos:I bet you it wasn't lived in for a long time, too.

Johnny:A guy I've worked with a little bit, he specifically focuses on like multimillionaire homes.

Johnny:And whenever someone calls him up to ask for a tour, he'll request a credit check.

Arctos:Yeah, I've heard about that.

Johnny:But yeah, it's great.

Johnny:If you can just fill out these forms and give me your bank statement and credit check, we can get it all set up.

Benny:I heard rumors of that happening at the front door of, like, Gucci or something.

Benny:They're like, just swipe your bank card.

Benny:We just want to check something real quick before we let you in.

Arctos:I've I saw this one story from one of those like famous New York real estate people.

Johnny:It was good.

Arctos:They're talking about how when they were like younger, I think they sold like a five million dollar apartment.

Arctos:And this guy wanted to see it.

Arctos:He called late at night.

Arctos:He's like, I was just he's like, I was so hungry back then.

Arctos:He like picked up range for this.

Arctos:The guy saw it pays the money in escrow like in 24 hours and then just like dips for like two years.

Arctos:And then the realtor like found him later.

Arctos:And it turns out this guy's like worth hundreds of millions of dollars because he controls this one small channel of like airplane traffic.

Arctos:So they have to like basically have to sublet planes for this one strip or something like that, whatever.

Arctos:And the real estate agent was like, why did you even buy this thing?

Arctos:It's so cheap for you.

Arctos:And he's like, I was drunk when I saw it.

Arctos:And then you seem so excited.

Arctos:I felt bad.

Arctos:So I bought it.

Arctos:And he's like, that's crazy.

Johnny:Having that much money.

Arctos:To be that level of rich, you're like, I felt bad.

Johnny:Yeah.

Arctos:I said I wanted to buy this $5 million apartment.

Arctos:I make like $100 a month.

Arctos:Okay.

Benny:I get the feeling when I'm at a store and they're like, do you want to add?

Benny:And I'm like, how much is it?

Benny:They're like $5.

Benny:I'm like, we're celebrating.

Johnny:Yeah.

Benny:It's a shame.

Benny:There are also other nice houses in Port Jeff that I'm seeing on Zillow.

Arctos:Oh, no.

Arctos:Port Jeff has some really nice houses.

Benny:They're closer to reasonable.

Arctos:The problem is it's like...

Benny:Yeah, it's literally the last place you can leave the island or something.

Arctos:Yeah, the problem is, like... I mean, it's one of the last places you can take the Færrin at.

Arctos:But the other... The other issue is that, um... It's, like, just really unreasonable to take a train.

Arctos:Like, I think it's, like, 60 to 70 minutes, and it's like, oh... There's a lot of good 30 and 40 minutes.

Arctos:Do I really want to add an extra 20 each way?

Arctos:Probably not.

Anzu:you

Arctos:And that's also why the houses are more affordable.

Arctos:And then if you go further out, you can say you're in the Hamptons.

Arctos:So that's... Well, the thing with Port Jeff is it's close to Rentech.

Benny:Yeah, these are definitely helicopter houses you can't take a train in.

Benny:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:So there's a little enclave called Beltaire, which is like a gated community that cuts off this cliff.

Arctos:And there's a bunch of mansions in there.

Arctos:And I can only assume it's doctors and Rentech people there.

Benny:Yeah, because there's a fucking Giant medical center at Stony Brook, but also it's by Stony Brook.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:So any guy that is like, I don't give a fuck about my property, he'll rent his fucking eight-bedroom house to a bunch of frat dudes.

Johnny:Thank you.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:I know this because I know one of the frat dudes that rented a house or tried to rent a house in Port Jeff.

Gamemaster:Did he succeed?

Benny:He did not succeed in renting the house.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Benny:They saw one, and they're like, this is crazy, we gotta get it.

Benny:And I can't remember what my brother was saying on why it didn't exactly go through, but there are frat houses in Port Jeff.

Arctos:Yeah.

Anzu:Listen, it's a clean one-hour train from Massapequa.

Johnny:I'd take that job.

Benny:Yeah, if your job was hanging out with Tanner, you'd be good.

Anzu:Actually, depending on where you are in Massapequa, it's much less than an hour to hang out with me.

Gamemaster:Yeah, what's the salary like?

Johnny:Tanner, are there openings to just hang out with you?

Johnny:Can we get paid for that?

Anzu:Oh.

Gamemaster:Benefits?

Johnny:Are there benefits besides just hanging out with you?

Arctos:Will you comp at least one margarita from that Mexican place?

Gamemaster:That is a benefit.

Gamemaster:Hmm.

Anzu:I could get you a margarita, yeah.

Arctos:No, no, no.

Gamemaster:Sorry, this job entails hanging out with you and also you fetching us margaritas?

Johnny:This is a great job.

Gamemaster:That's a pretty good deal.

Arctos:If someone fetches it for us, he just pays the servant.

Johnny:Wow.

Gamemaster:Oh, this job involves having a servant and being around Tanner.

Johnny:Even better.

Anzu:I kind of think we have to go to the restaurant to get their margaritas, but I'm not positive.

Gamemaster:Not if you have a servant.

Johnny:What's the point of the servant if he's not going to get you the margaritas?

Arctos:What's the point of hanging out with you if we have to leave to get margaritas?

Anzu:That's true.

Anzu:I don't know.

Anzu:I guess I didn't really think my value prop all the way through.

Anzu:Level four.

Gamemaster:Do we want to play some Pathfinder?

Gamemaster:Excuse me.

Johnny:Yeah, let's loot this body.

Benny:Let's grab him.

Gamemaster:Does anybody want to do a recap of what happened last session?

Gamemaster:Jorge's hand is up.

Gamemaster:That means Jorge gets to go.

Arctos:Cool.

Arctos:So there was a group of four ragtag adventurers hanging out in a subway station.

Arctos:They were like, wow, there's a moth over there.

Arctos:And then we don't know what to do.

Arctos:Then we had Mindbird guess a 50-50 on levers.

Johnny:Hello.

Arctos:Might have lost the 50-50.

Arctos:To be honest, still not sure.

Arctos:We said, fuck it, we're breaking shit.

Arctos:And we break the cabin and the moth tries to fly away.

Arctos:Benny goes, uh-uh, bitch, and sucks it up.

Arctos:And then for some reason, three members of the group got really sad about killing a magical sound moth in limbo.

Arctos:But they were really broken up about it.

Arctos:And then Bear Man had to be like, it doesn't really matter, guys.

Arctos:So we moved around.

Arctos:We solved puzzles with sound.

Arctos:which is really cool because before we used to solve puzzles with light, we were super smart and got them immediately.

Arctos:These puzzles, Josh didn't even need to draw them.

Arctos:We just visually, just from hearing it, the sound, we're like, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam.

Arctos:We did that.

Arctos:We then fought some guys.

Arctos:They didn't last long.

Arctos:Yeah, yeah.

Gamemaster:Oh, you fought them.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:The shades, the shades.

Arctos:We then go.

Arctos:They're like, all right, time to go get our soul back.

Arctos:So we go back.

Arctos:We meet this guy named Aut.

Arctos:Very helpful.

Arctos:Honestly, really nice NPC.

Arctos:He might be evil, but he's good to us.

Arctos:So that's all that matters.

Arctos:He didn't insult our intelligence.

Arctos:He didn't insult anything about us.

Arctos:And we're like, cool, we like you.

Arctos:So then we're like, by the way, where is the deer man?

Arctos:And he's like, oh, he's over here.

Arctos:He's got four guards.

Arctos:And then we're like, how about that fucking guy who's a half Giant?

Arctos:And he's just like, if you wait in this alley in 27 hours, you could totally jump his ass.

Arctos:And we're like, fucking bet.

Arctos:So we didn't do anything else.

Arctos:We had single focus.

Arctos:We went home.

Arctos:We slept.

Arctos:We got up.

Arctos:We went to this alley and we waited for this fucker.

Arctos:This guy...

Arctos:absolute d-bag instead of peeing somewhere else decides he's gonna poison a water supply last mistake gets there fucking jump his ass like everyone jumps his ass a bird jumps off a building little boy runs out of a darker part of the alley we stole his keys before jumping him and then uh he gets killed by mind bird with a piss coin right through the skull right through the skull that's just that's that's karma

Johnny:you

Arctos:There's no other way to talk about it.

Gamemaster:I literally have a transcript.

Arctos:It's karma.

Arctos:He took our old friend, dumped him in the river.

Arctos:So we took some other river and we dumped it through his head.

Arctos:And yeah, that's what he gets.

Arctos:And then I think right before it cut out, Josh said we looted him and found $10 million.

Johnny:I remember that.

Arctos:So he did say that and there's no take backsies.

Arctos:So there you go.

Johnny:I remember that.

Arctos:Oh.

Arctos:No, no, no.

Arctos:You said right before doing it, you just cut it off randomly.

Arctos:And then you go, sorry, I had to cut that off.

Arctos:I also don't want this on the transcript.

Arctos:And then gives it to us and goes, serious?

Arctos:No, take backsies.

Arctos:So, yeah.

Anzu:Yeah, I think we found his 10 mil and his notebook with his very options-heavy investing strategy that got him the 10 mil.

Arctos:Yes.

Benny:But no polytool.

Arctos:About onions.

Johnny:How about onions?

Arctos:And it's convenient because there's credit cards now, so that's where his money is.

Arctos:Or debit cards?

Arctos:I don't know if we have credit yet.

Arctos:We weren't greedy.

Gamemaster:Credit does exist.

Gamemaster:You guys don't have enough money to get credit from a bank.

Gamemaster:You don't have enough assets for that.

Gamemaster:But credit as a concept exists.

Johnny:Hmm.

Anzu:He could have a poly tool in his safe pocket, Mike.

Arctos:We can get leveraged, boys!

Anzu:We haven't fully looked yet.

Johnny:Yeah.

Benny:his safe pocket.

Gamemaster:In a safe pocket?

Anzu:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Where on the life is the safe pocket located?

Arctos:I've been seeing Ark Raiders on.

Gamemaster:So...

Anzu:Not sure.

Anzu:Haven't looted him yet.

Gamemaster:Everything about that recap was correct, except the $10 million.

Gamemaster:That was a lie.

Arctos:Damn it.

Gamemaster:And also, he left out that Arctos contracted polar bear leprosy, which I did say after turning off the transcript.

Arctos:Thought I was going to get you with that one.

Arctos:That's crazy.

Arctos:Is he going to lose his fur?

Johnny:No, I think you misheard.

Gamemaster:No, his limbs.

Johnny:You said leopard to see, so now you're a leopard.

Anzu:Thank you.

Benny:Yeah, no, he's going to get spots.

Arctos:Oh, is he going to get spots?

Gamemaster:Oh, yes.

Benny:Yeah.

Arctos:He's going to get spots.

Arctos:No!

Gamemaster:Uh, that's not true either, but you did successfully, uh, or specifically Mindbird, uh, did kill Hlarf with a piss coin.

Arctos:My bad.

Gamemaster:Um, so yeah, we will, uh, pick up, um, in an alley, uh, with the corpse of a half-Giant, um, on the ground.

Gamemaster:What did you guys want to do?

Arctos:One final quick question.

Arctos:Did any of you guys watch that movie I recommended about the deep cover?

Gamemaster:My next character I'm going to make Orlando Bloom.

Johnny:Yes.

Johnny:Yes, I did.

Arctos:How'd you like it?

Johnny:It was surprisingly good.

Johnny:When I started it, I was like, there's no way this is good.

Arctos:Yeah, yeah, no, no.

Arctos:It's like a solid movie.

Johnny:Yeah.

Arctos:My next character, I'm going to make Orlando Bloom, and he's going to be way too serious in every circumstance.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Johnny:Cool.

Gamemaster:Should I be concerned that you're talking about your next character when you've played this character for one session?

Arctos:No!

Arctos:Two sessions!

Gamemaster:One and a half.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:We loot the body.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:I will... I'll check out the car.

Gamemaster:Yeah, okay.

Gamemaster:So for those of you who want to start looting things, you can do so.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I'd love a perception check and for you to inform me what you're attempting to loot.

Arctos:I'm eluding this guy's body.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:Or someone will load the car.

Arctos:Oh.

Arctos:Um.

Arctos:Is Dicebot on?

Gamemaster:Oh, maybe not, if you haven't received any information.

Gamemaster:One second.

Arctos:Well, I just got a 40 on my other screen, so I guess we can just roll with that.

Gamemaster:I can... Okay.

Johnny:You got a 40 on one D20 plus 10.

Gamemaster:One second.

Arctos:Yeah, yeah.

Arctos:It's a crit.

Arctos:I just unrolled it for you.

Johnny:Crit, so add in 10.

Arctos:Yeah, it's the same thing, so I could just do that.

Johnny:Arctos is crazy.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:I'm gonna reboot the Dicebot and we'll see if that helps.

Gamemaster:Give it a moment.

Gamemaster:Okay, try again.

Arctos:22 for me on this body.

Johnny:15 for this car.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Gamemaster:So... 22, looting the body.

Gamemaster:Just kind of patting the guy down, looking for stuff that he has, you know, checking his safe pocket, all of that fun stuff.

Gamemaster:On his person, you find a few things of note.

Gamemaster:You find a little...

Gamemaster:what looks to be a journal of some kind.

Arctos:yeah yes

Gamemaster:It appears to be locked, like there's a small bracket connecting the two covers, and there's a small padlock of some kind hanging on it.

Gamemaster:In addition, you find a small card that you would recognize as a bank card.

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:It doesn't list how much money is on it, obviously, so you'll need to figure that out somehow.

Gamemaster:Oh, shoot.

Gamemaster:I know which bank this is for.

Gamemaster:I don't actually think it's relevant which bank this is for.

Gamemaster:But it's issued by Iridite Mutual.

Gamemaster:And then you also find... Shoot, there was a third thing that you found on them.

Benny:Thank you.

Johnny:You.

Gamemaster:And I'm trying to remember what it is.

Gamemaster:Oh, you find a keychain.

Gamemaster:This keychain has two keys on it, as well as a small keychain trinket thing just attached to the chain that you would recognize no role necessary as the logo of a Gas-n-Go℠, which is like an auto body shop chain in the city.

Arctos:Alright, so what was that?

Gamemaster:So it is a keychain with two keys on it, as well as like, you know, like a flat piece of plastic with paper inside of it.

Arctos:It was like a Gas-n-Go℠.

Arctos:Like those old school when you could put that to get your gas paid for.

Arctos:Okay.

Benny:Oh.

Gamemaster:So it looks like the logo and it has the logo of an auto body shop.

Johnny:Cool.

Arctos:Probably underground.

Johnny:Probably where they're hiding.

Arctos:Well, we know where you're hiding Tywelwyn.

Johnny:Maybe it's there.

Gamemaster:You do have the address of where Tywelwyn is located, but nothing beyond that.

Gamemaster:And then we got a 15 for searching the car?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Can two people search the car, or only one?

Gamemaster:I'll allow a second person to search the car if you don't trust the 15.

Arctos:When I'm done.

Gamemaster:Not the same number of... If you searched the person, you can't search the car.

Arctos:When I'm done, I'll... Oh, you want to check?

Arctos:Boy.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Sounds good, sounds good.

Gamemaster:Because you're busy searching the person.

Arctos:I feel bad the first time... One of the first times you guys hang out with the bear, he checks someone's keister.

Benny:You searched the person.

Arctos:It's kind of crazy.

Johnny:What's crazy is that's the first place he looked.

Arctos:Gotta be really thorough, guys.

Benny:19 to check the car.

Johnny:He didn't look anywhere.

Johnny:He started there.

Arctos:Well, he had this diary, so...

Gamemaster:That wasn't in a safe pocket.

Gamemaster:Nothing was in your safe pocket.

Gamemaster:Just to clarify.

Benny:Hit a get a free load of it.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Gamemaster:19 to search the car.

Gamemaster:So there was a really low DC to recognize the interesting thing about this particular car.

Gamemaster:This is an Aventine, which is kind of... It's the...

Gamemaster:The fantasy equivalent of a G-Wagon, effectively.

Arctos:Hell yeah.

Gamemaster:It's a relatively expensive car.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:It's not the kind of car that normally would drive in the neighborhood that you caught this guy in.

Gamemaster:So on its own, it's a little bit flashy, if nothing else.

Gamemaster:But this one actually has an optional feature on it.

Gamemaster:You pop the trunk, and there's about 15 feet of space inside of this trunk.

Arctos:Hell yeah.

Gamemaster:This is a trunk with a built-in portable hole, effectively.

Johnny:Yeah.

Arctos:Hell yeah.

Gamemaster:You can't remove the hole from the trunk, but the inside of the trunk is larger than the exterior.

Gamemaster:searching around trying to find things just like throughout the car of note you've already found you have the keys for the car in addition there is a like a duffel bag a go bag effectively tucked into the expanded trunk that has a set of clothes um

Gamemaster:Some fake IDs associated with, like, flipping through them, you can see there's some with Hlarf's picture on them under different names, and then also some other faces that you would recognize as some of the people that killed you in the bar, as well as a handful of other people that you assume are also part of the Roundhat Gang.

Gamemaster:You also find a levered crowbar and a set of infiltrator's theme stools.

Arctos:Benny can take that.

Gamemaster:Sorry, a thieves toolkit infiltrator.

Gamemaster:Which gives you... The thieves kit gives you a plus one item bonus to pick locks and disable devices, and the levered crowbar gives you a plus one bonus to athletics checks to force open anything that can be pried.

Johnny:Yeah, that's a Benjamin.

Benny:Sure.

Arctos:He can take both of them.

Johnny:These seem like Benny.

Arctos:Yeah, I bet he could take both.

Anzu:Give them to Benny.

Arctos:Question.

Arctos:Do we see a tracking device with that check?

Gamemaster:With your rolls, you do not find a tracking device of any kind in the car.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:So I say first two steps.

Arctos:One, we should probably drag his body, throw him into the river.

Arctos:And two,

Arctos:Do you guys know how to clean a car?

Arctos:Do we have someone that can clean a car?

Arctos:Do you think Iconoclasm can clean it?

Johnny:I mean, if we can get it back in under an hour, I have a spell that can disguise it for a little bit.

Anzu:Yeah, that would be good.

Gamemaster:It's less than an hour drive to anywhere in this part of the city that you would want to go.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Arctos:How are banks open 24-7 in this world?

Arctos:ATMs?

Arctos:How does that work?

Gamemaster:ATMs are, yeah.

Arctos:Are there, like, withdrawal limits?

Gamemaster:An automagic teller machine.

Gamemaster:It depends on the account.

Arctos:Okay, okay.

Johnny:This seems like a guy who does not have a withdrawal limit on his account.

Arctos:Yeah, yeah, we should hit this up first, or should we just go to a bank tomorrow?

Johnny:I think we should hit this up first.

Johnny:It seems like if he's not back in eight hours, they'll know he's dead.

Benny:Yeah.

Arctos:All right, let's do that.

Arctos:Cool, cool.

Arctos:So we'll disguise it and then we're bringing it.

Arctos:Do we have like an under... I've never hung out with a group of people that aren't super rich.

Arctos:Do you guys have like a fence or something?

Arctos:Or do we just bring it to those guys in the garage?

Arctos:They made sure to warn me that the garage is booby-trapped.

Johnny:I think... I do have a fence.

Anzu:I think we'll see what Dura can do with it, and if not, find another solution.

Arctos:I was going to get... The car's going to drop me off.

Johnny:I do have a fence, but this does seem like a garage sort of thing.

Arctos:Okay.

Arctos:Okay, just a reminder to not drive into the garage.

Arctos:The car service that was dropping me off was going to do that.

Arctos:And then they came out, they're like, no, no, no, it's booby trapped.

Arctos:So just, just a reminder.

Anzu:Yes, that would be good.

Johnny:Okay.

Arctos:All right.

Johnny:Um... Oh.

Benny:Thank you.

Johnny:My apologies.

Johnny:This is only a stationary object.

Anzu:Alright, well, it's late, so we'll just drive home and...

Arctos:That's fine.

Arctos:Stop by an ATM.

Arctos:Someone go disguised.

Arctos:Were there cameras yet?

Gamemaster:No.

Arctos:Cool.

Arctos:Someone just withdraws it.

Arctos:And then... Alright, someone goes disguised.

Gamemaster:You would know that in place of that, like, an ATM would just have a guard on stand, like, outside of the bank.

Arctos:I can't, for obvious reasons.

Johnny:Why not?

Arctos:They know me.

Benny:You're the closest in size, though.

Johnny:Why?

Johnny:You are the closest to his size.

Arctos:No.

Arctos:The ATM doesn't have an identification card on it, right?

Arctos:Like a photo.

Gamemaster:No.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:It does have a pin, though.

Benny:I imagine.

Arctos:Will it have a pin?

Benny:Does it have a pin?

Johnny:Do we have those keys on his keychain to open up the pocketbook or diary?

Arctos:Oh, yeah.

Arctos:Let's see.

Gamemaster:A cursory check.

Gamemaster:No, neither of the keys do.

Johnny:Oh.

Arctos:I bet you it's for the gas station.

Arctos:I mean, we could try jumping them now, or we can go home.

Benny:jump away jumping who they never will

Arctos:the people in the gas station.

Anzu:Oh, you want to go right for Tywelwyn?

Johnny:I think we should.

Arctos:I mean the gas station.

Arctos:It might be Tywelwyn, but also... Okay.

Johnny:I think we should do a little bit more planning.

Johnny:Gear up a little bit.

Johnny:Get anything we may need for this assault.

Johnny:then maybe do that.

Johnny:Okay.

Arctos:They will not expect us.

Arctos:Alright, I throw his body into the river.

Benny:Thank you.

Arctos:And are there pins in debit cards back then?

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:I'm not going to make you roll an athletics check for it.

Gamemaster:It's a relatively large body, but you have time, so you can just kind of drag it over into the room.

Gamemaster:Some banks offer that.

Anzu:Benny see if you can get this journal open and I'm going to cast guidance

Gamemaster:It's one of those things that it's up to the individual bank, so you'd have to find out by trying to withdraw something.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:I will use, I will aid him.

Johnny:I got a 30 to aid Benny.

Benny:Let me go ahead and look up themes.

Benny:Toolkit infiltrator.

Gamemaster:That would be a success.

Benny:Perfect.

Benny:So that's a plus two.

Gamemaster:And then you also have guidance, so... Guidance is... That's a regular success.

Anzu:which is one.

Anzu:Mine is status.

Johnny:wait josh was the third is the 30th success or a regular or a crit or a regular success okay yeah mine's circumstance

Gamemaster:So is it just a plus one?

Benny:Oh, sorry.

Benny:Plus.

Gamemaster:What benefits do these things give?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Okay, and the lockpick infiltrator set is item, so you just get plus three to this roll.

Anzu:All right.

Benny:Yes.

Benny:23.

Gamemaster:23.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you've got this fancy pick set.

Gamemaster:You've got two people eating you.

Gamemaster:You maneuver the lock picks into place.

Gamemaster:You give it one twist, and you feel the pick that you're using twist and break.

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, this seems like it's a pretty hard lock to pick.

Anzu:Wow.

Arctos:I'll bring it to the garage.

Arctos:They probably have like a drill or something.

Benny:Sure.

Arctos:Shoot an ATM.

Gamemaster:Okay, so your next step is to find an ATM of Iridite Mutual and see if you can withdraw any money off of this card?

Johnny:I got a plus.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:I want either a survival or society check here to see if you know of one, ideally one that's less scrutinized.

Anzu:I could do society if we want.

Anzu:I've got 10.

Johnny:Do you want to do that?

Johnny:I will aid his society.

Arctos:I don't have something that's helpful here.

Johnny:got an 18. i think that's i think at this level it's a failure so no nothing oh so nothing

Gamemaster:That is a failure at this level.

Gamemaster:A level 4 check is DC 19.

Anzu:Well, that's not going to help then.

Gamemaster:Yeah, unfortunately you guys cruise around Sableclutch for a little bit, looking for an ATM, and you don't find any.

Arctos:Excellent.

Gamemaster:You could always go to Iridite Mutual headquarters, because you know there's an ATM there, but you also know that that would be the best guarded.

Gamemaster:If you don't care about there being a guard present, then that's fine.

Gamemaster:That's an easy go.

Arctos:Is there any people on the street that we can ask?

Gamemaster:No, it's like 3am.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:Well, we should go home and then wake up someone to ask if they know.

Anzu:I feel like... Yeah, we need to get Dyrrra.

Johnny:We go home.

Gamemaster:Okay, sure.

Benny:Sure.

Arctos:We don't pull into the driveway.

Gamemaster:You guys drive back to the Sin and Tonic.

Gamemaster:You don't pull into the driveway because you were warned that it's booby-trapped.

Gamemaster:You guys can find your way inside.

Gamemaster:What is the plan?

Arctos:We'll first try to get this car in there.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Gamemaster:You can go find her room.

Gamemaster:It's in the back with all of the other ones that wake her up.

Gamemaster:You knock on her door and you hear a bit of scrambling and like a groan on the other side and then you hear Dura call out, What?

Anzu:I'm so sorry to wake you up.

Anzu:We didn't get your car back, but we did inherit another car that we would like to pull into the garage without the booby traps going off.

Gamemaster:When you say inherit, do you mean purchase or steal?

Johnny:We don't have to answer that.

Arctos:We won it.

Anzu:The previous owner is not alive.

Gamemaster:Steal.

Gamemaster:Okay, that's fine.

Gamemaster:Give me a second.

Gamemaster:And after a moment, there's a bit of rustling and the door opens.

Gamemaster:A very bleary-eyed Dura kind of stumbles out and says, give me a moment to disable the traps and let you pull it in.

Gamemaster:Should I be concerned about the previous owner, like, somewhere else coming to find this car?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:If you want to give it a once over, that's probably a good idea for trackers.

Johnny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:And she, like, stumbles over into the garage and... Yep.

Arctos:Hey.

Arctos:Do you... Quick question before you go.

Arctos:And I like holding the card.

Arctos:Do you know where an Iridite Mutual ATM is?

Gamemaster:I know where the bank is.

Benny:Didn't we check with him on the badge and he was like, I can't...

Gamemaster:Is that helpful?

Arctos:No.

Gamemaster:Okay, I'm going to open the garage.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:Do we have like a fence that can pull this money out?

Arctos:Case of offense.

Johnny:I do have a fence.

Johnny:We can see.

Johnny:Well, he said he could, but I think he said it would involve actually running the badge, which might tip someone off.

Arctos:Yeah, I think he said a fee or something.

Benny:Fees are fine.

Benny:I think it's the tip-off.

Benny:If we're pulling it out of an ATM, it's also a tip-off.

Benny:It was used at whatever time.

Johnny:I mean, if we kill Tywelwyn fast enough, then what's he going to do?

Johnny:He's dead.

Johnny:Is he going to come back?

Benny:This is true.

Benny:I think we have the fence pull money out.

Arctos:That's a great idea.

Arctos:If we kill him, we get all of his assets.

Johnny:I don't know if that's quite how assets work.

Johnny:This car is, like, we did just, we stole this one, so.

Arctos:We earned it.

Arctos:We took it from a weaker person.

Johnny:Fair.

Arctos:All right, should we go to your fence?

Johnny:I mean, at 3 a.m., he's definitely asleep.

Gamemaster:And the store is also definitely closed.

Arctos:I thought fences are...

Anzu:I think we need to probably sleep it off and address this in the morning.

Arctos:This is so much fun, though, guys.

Johnny:Is this... Hey, Arctos, question.

Arctos:I've never killed someone in an alley before.

Anzu:I know, but the world...

Johnny:Is this the first time... Questionable.

Arctos:Actually, I have.

Arctos:I take it back.

Arctos:I have.

Arctos:But this one, we got the jump on him.

Johnny:Is this the first time you've ever been awake past 1 a.m.

Johnny:?

Arctos:You know, normally at 10, I start getting it.

Arctos:I get delivered a mug of hot cocoa.

Arctos:So yes, that puts me straight to bed.

Benny:no more milk coca-cola

Arctos:No, no, no, no, no.

Arctos:Cocoa.

Arctos:It's delicious.

Johnny:Arctos' grandma.

Johnny:You like this guy?

Arctos:That's for the day.

Arctos:I did do some modeling for them back in the day.

Gamemaster:Yeah, absolutely.

Gamemaster:The garage is open.

Gamemaster:You can pull in.

Gamemaster:That's totally fine.

Arctos:So do we all sleep in a room together to make sure we don't get jumped?

Arctos:Or do we... How does that work here?

Anzu:This place is pretty secure, so we've got our own facility.

Johnny:Did you...

Benny:Little.

Johnny:Did they give you a room?

Arctos:Yeah, my bed's in there.

Arctos:I have a bear bed, you know?

Arctos:Yeah, you think I'd sleep on one of your beds?

Anzu:That makes a lot of sense, yeah.

Arctos:That's crazy.

Anzu:I'm glad they were able to accommodate you like that.

Johnny:What?

Arctos:Yeah, I like to curl into a nice little ball.

Anzu:All right, well, great work today.

Anzu:And I'll see you guys in the morning.

Arctos:You guys want to go and visit the place where Tywelwyn is?

Gamemaster:And those of you who aren't wired, go to sleep, I guess.

Arctos:We got some hours before it gets light out, you know?

Arctos:Get the jump on him.

Johnny:Arctos, I died last night.

Benny:Can I go to bed?

Johnny:I need to sleep.

Arctos:I go off to bed.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:And, you know, for my sake, a bear bed is just like a dog bed, but bigger.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Yes.

Arctos:I had the bed removed and then they brought it in.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:You all get a morning's rest and wake up if a little, you know, offset from your normal schedule.

Gamemaster:Having rest?

Anzu:Honestly, we've been going to bed pretty late pretty consistently.

Gamemaster:So then it's normal for you to wake up at like 10, 11, something like that.

Johnny:Smile.

Arctos:you

Anzu:Hmm.

Benny:I forgot what the fence's name was, but to the fence.

Benny:Howard.

Benny:To Howard.

Gamemaster:Smiler.

Anzu:Um...

Benny:I know, I completely miss her.

Gamemaster:Howard.

Anzu:Well, does Dura think that it's safe for us to operate the vehicle?

Gamemaster:Give me a second.

Benny:I don't know if it's... I don't think that's... I don't think that's, like, a mechanical...

Johnny:Is it safe?

Arctos:I think we should at least change some of the stuff first.

Arctos:Even if there's no tracker, we shouldn't use the same color car.

Arctos:We should get different license plates.

Arctos:Whatever it is, we should get different things.

Benny:I also, I don't think it's like a mechanical... I think we're driving a very expensive car in a not very expensive... We're going to look like drug dealers.

Johnny:The one thing we're not...

Arctos:Well, it could have been mine.

Gamemaster:Because that is, you did steal it off of drug dealers.

Gamemaster:Dura did like a once-over of all of the mechanical bits and found nothing that seemed particularly up to work.

Gamemaster:The only thing that she did find of note is that there have been some aftermarket modifications to the engine of this car, so its top speed is a little higher than it comes off the lot with.

Anzu:Dura, is there anything that you're able to do to maybe alter the appearance of this car or somewhere we could go to kind of wash it of any affiliations it may have?

Gamemaster:I could paint it, and we can swap the City Tripper's plates onto it.

Arctos:I also have a request.

Arctos:Other requests.

Arctos:What if we mounted one or more guns on the top?

Gamemaster:There's a mounting spot on an Aventine for guns on the top, sides, back, and front hood.

Arctos:What color is it now?

Johnny:Are they...

Gamemaster:It's currently white.

Arctos:We should make it matte black.

Arctos:And then put as many guns as we can.

Arctos:And then we get a metal bumper so we can ram people.

Arctos:And then we should lift the tires.

Arctos:Hey, this is having a blast.

Arctos:And then he's just like, and then we can put Iconoclasm on the side.

Gamemaster:As you're saying this, Dura will say, I have some acquaintances from my run gunner days who would be happy to make modifications like that for you.

Gamemaster:It's kind of their shtick.

Gamemaster:It's not cheap, but if you are looking to add a ram to a front of a car, they're the people to go to.

Anzu:Yeah, we could pencil that in for the future.

Anzu:I think for now, maybe some new paint would be good.

Johnny:Different license plates.

Gamemaster:I don't have Matt Black on hand.

Johnny:Artists.

Arctos:Yeah, we can find that.

Arctos:Don't mention to your friends, the RunGunners, me.

Arctos:They're really scared of me.

Arctos:I know they're terrified of me, so just don't mention it.

Arctos:They might hike up the deal.

Benny:They have a thing for against bears.

Gamemaster:Because you're a bear?

Gamemaster:Should I be scared of you?

Arctos:No, no, no.

Arctos:I have a history with them.

Arctos:They're scared of me.

Arctos:No, no.

Gamemaster:Because I have no idea who you are.

Benny:Why would they charge us?

Johnny:Why are they scared of you?

Arctos:Well, when I was awoken, they were trying to attack the nobleman's child, and I just killed all of them and saved the day.

Arctos:That's how I got knighted.

Johnny:Oh, that's pretty cool.

Arctos:I'm sure there are really high-level RunGunners, too.

Arctos:So I'm sure tales of this are now striking fear into everyone's hearts.

Arctos:That's a problem.

Gamemaster:Did you kill any of my friends?

Arctos:Well, did they try to kill a child?

Gamemaster:No?

Arctos:All right, so it wasn't them.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:Hey, if you pay for it, man, whatever you want.

Gamemaster:Anyway, um... I need to go out and get, like, paint.

Arctos:OK.

Gamemaster:Are you gonna pay me for the paint?

Gamemaster:20 gold, probably?

Arctos:How much is matte black?

Arctos:How about, would you guys be OK if we get iridescent paint?

Benny:Yeah, if you're paying.

Arctos:How much is your iridescent paint?

Gamemaster:I'm gonna have 30, probably.

Arctos:Like purple 30?

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Arctos:All right, I'll rain check on that.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:Are you trying to make this card more or less conspicuous?

Johnny:Whatever the cheapest paint is, go for that one.

Arctos:Arctos looks sad.

Johnny:Yeah, I like that.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:If you give me 5 gold, I can get, like, a really ugly green.

Gamemaster:And I'll blend right in.

Anzu:That could be fun.

Benny:Sure.

Arctos:I don't have any money.

Benny:Does any of us have any money?

Anzu:Oh, how much was it?

Gamemaster:Five.

Anzu:Five?

Gamemaster:Five.

Anzu:I could give five.

Anzu:Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Johnny:Yeah, two of us died and got all of our stuff stolen, so... Dura, I feel...

Benny:Yeah, we kind of want to get that stuff back.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I know.

Gamemaster:One of your, all of your stuff stolen is my car.

Anzu:But look at this other car that we got.

Anzu:Look at this other car.

Gamemaster:Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I liked the city tripper.

Arctos:If we.

Arctos:If we get this card.

Anzu:Well, that's on our to-do list for sure.

Arctos:If we sell this car, how much would it go for?

Arctos:Maybe we should get the city tripper back and then just sell this.

Gamemaster:A lot.

Arctos:Or create a car of War.

Arctos:Either way, I'm fine with either one.

Benny:That much is a lot.

Gamemaster:10,000 gold?

Benny:Let's go try to pull some money out from this.

Johnny:Let's go to Smiler.

Arctos:Alright, just sit on this car.

Arctos:We'll get some money.

Johnny:We're going to go into a friend of mine.

Arctos:Okay.

Johnny:Be cool.

Benny:Wait.

Arctos:Is he... No, no.

Benny:Have you ever ripped to shreds any fences that were trying to murder a child?

Benny:Any ghosts that were trying to murder a child?

Arctos:I don't know if I'd be able to see a ghost.

Benny:Don't point at Johnny.

Johnny:Ooh.

Arctos:Oh.

Arctos:Why aren't you, like, red?

Johnny:What?

Benny:He's well-read.

Arctos:No, like, if you're like a ghost Aurelion, why don't you have like the red thing?

Johnny:I like poetry.

Johnny:Oh, it's a long story.

Johnny:Let's go to Smiler.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:To Howard.

Gamemaster:To Howard.

Gamemaster:You all, I guess, take the trolley?

Gamemaster:Take the tram?

Gamemaster:To Smiler?

Gamemaster:Make the quick jaunt over.

Gamemaster:Move slightly down the horizon to the under table, which is Smiler's shop.

Gamemaster:Three of you have already met Smiler before.

Gamemaster:One of you is a polar bear who is for the first time meeting this.

Gamemaster:It's a centaur.

Gamemaster:Tall enough that his head is kind of scraping the top of the ceiling.

Gamemaster:He looks like he's bent over a little bit.

Arctos:What's his reignment again?

Gamemaster:Wearing a white tank top that's clearly stained.

Gamemaster:He's been wearing it for a while at this point.

Gamemaster:Big old beard with golden gems braided into it.

Gamemaster:In the midst of what looks to be polishing a pretty gnarly looking...

Gamemaster:three-foot-long sword, knife kind of thing in that range.

Gamemaster:It's around there.

Gamemaster:Yep.

Gamemaster:He is of the host.

Arctos:Cool.

Gamemaster:He looks up and sees Johnny walking in with his entourage.

Johnny:I'm here on business, Smiler.

Johnny:I'm in the middle of a gang War.

Gamemaster:You've literally never not been here on business.

Gamemaster:I'm not going to fight with you if that's the question.

Johnny:Hey.

Johnny:No, I know you're not really into that.

Johnny:Also, this is Sir Arctos.

Johnny:The other guy, Argyle, died and didn't come back.

Benny:Yeah, I died too.

Gamemaster:You replaced him already?

Gamemaster:Sick.

Gamemaster:No, you didn't.

Johnny:Yeah, me and Benny both died, but we came back this time.

Gamemaster:You're standing.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Gamemaster:Yeah, but I'm used to it when you die and come back.

Arctos:I do the host signal for him.

Arctos:I pull it up.

Gamemaster:I'm not used to it when he dies and comes back.

Gamemaster:Are you like him?

Johnny:No, this was actually a totally different thing this time.

Johnny:Crazy.

Johnny:I got to talk to... After I fix this... I kind of fucked up.

Johnny:After I fix everything, I really got to talk to Donnie.

Gamemaster:Right.

Gamemaster:Okay, so what do you need?

Johnny:But... Oh, yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Who's got the credit card?

Johnny:Who's got the card?

Johnny:We need all the money off of this.

Gamemaster:Is there something I should be concerned about when I access it?

Johnny:This is Tywelwyn, Leatherhide's first mate, and we killed him last night in an alley.

Gamemaster:Good for you.

Benny:Then we have his car.

Arctos:We hit his body too.

Johnny:We tossed his body in the lake naked.

Johnny:Or in the river naked.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You have his car.

Gamemaster:He dumped his body.

Gamemaster:He took his shit.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Cool.

Gamemaster:If this has any money on it, I'm going to take a percentage of it.

Arctos:How much?

Gamemaster:I don't know.

Gamemaster:I'm going to wait to see how much money's on it first.

Arctos:And then I look over at Johnny.

Arctos:We trust that he's going to tell us the right amount of money is on it, right?

Johnny:Yeah, of course.

Johnny:I trust Smiler.

Arctos:Does Argo... No, does Arctos trust him?

Gamemaster:Roll a perception check.

Johnny:T20 plus.

Arctos:Oh no!

Arctos:Wait a second, wait a second.

Arctos:I didn't do it right.

Arctos:21.

Gamemaster:No, it's too late.

Gamemaster:21.

Johnny:Whatever just happened there.

Gamemaster:I... Smiler is an unscrupulous man.

Gamemaster:He would not think twice about ripping off Arctos if he walked in here alone.

Benny:you

Arctos:I'm wise.

Gamemaster:but I don't know as good as a polar bear you're pretty good at reading people aren't you right so I think Arctos would probably gather that he's built a rapport with Johnny and he would prefer Johnny to keep coming back than to possibly sour that relationship so right

Arctos:And he could just take a bigger cut.

Arctos:He doesn't need to lie about it.

Johnny:Yeah.

Arctos:Okay, cool.

Johnny:Wait.

Johnny:We'll give you a cut, but I also want to throw in any sort of silver coating you got for weapons for my two friends here.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I can silver some weapons if you like.

Johnny:Cool.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Fine.

Gamemaster:Takes the card.

Gamemaster:He pulls out... It looks like a credit card reader that somebody stuck just a second credit card reader on top of the first one, so it's double the length.

Gamemaster:And he slides the card through both of them.

Gamemaster:There is a...

Gamemaster:Some clicks on his cash register, and you can see that there's some Nixie tubes on the front that light up.

Gamemaster:And he says, okay, there are 900 gold pieces on this.

Gamemaster:I'm going to take 50.

Johnny:Bye.

Gamemaster:Cool.

Gamemaster:What weapons do you need silvered?

Arctos:I pull out my bastard sword.

Arctos:Does cold iron also affect?

Gamemaster:All right.

Benny:uh this pick and did i only have just another wrench how much is a pick seven silver yeah can i just have another pick if there's one in stock

Gamemaster:roll roll an occultism check to see if you would know what is effective on lycanthropes

Arctos:And if so, whichever is the cheapest?

Johnny:MIND BURN!

Arctos:There's silver, then there's another thing.

Arctos:I'll leave that for Mind Bird.

Anzu:Let me refer to my studies.

Anzu:I didn't read about that one.

Arctos:All right, we'll just stick with silver.

Gamemaster:What did you get?

Gamemaster:Oh, a 13.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Well, you got a hero point.

Arctos:We'll stick with silver.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Gamemaster:So, silvering a weapon is traditionally four equal pieces per weapon.

Gamemaster:He already agreed to silver two of your weapons, so that you're actually kind of getting a discount on that for his whatever.

Arctos:Cool.

Gamemaster:If you wanted more than that, you'd have to pay for it.

Arctos:Nope.

Benny:Fair enough.

Benny:Just the one pick.

Johnny:Can I just get like a little hunk of silver for my needle darts spell?

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:That also costs money.

Gamemaster:That's ten gold pieces for a chunk.

Johnny:Okay.

Gamemaster:I will let you split the chunk up into 10 pieces of silver ammunition, if you like.

Anzu:Bye.

Johnny:How does needle darts work?

Gamemaster:Actually, wait.

Gamemaster:Isn't there?

Arctos:I think so.

Gamemaster:There's like silver salve, isn't there?

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Silver salve is 6 gold pieces and lets you silver 10 pieces of ammunition.

Gamemaster:So I'll say it's 6 gold pieces for 10 shots of silvered telekinetic projectile or whatever.

Benny:So what are we spending?

Benny:Are we spending out of the 850 we were given?

Benny:I'm wondering how much accounting I should be doing.

Gamemaster:So the 50 that he took from you is the fee for him extracting the money out of the card as well as for silvering the two weapons, because he promised to that up front.

Arctos:And then there's another six.

Gamemaster:Anything beyond that costs additional money, but you do have your standard 10% discount at the Undertable.

Gamemaster:So if the only thing that you're looking to get is the six gold pieces worth like the ten pieces of ammunition, you can do that.

Arctos:Ten percent off that, too.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Yeah, do we want anything else to go into battle while we're here?

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah, sounds good.

Arctos:I've always wanted a grappling hook.

Arctos:Do you guys have any of those?

Arctos:Apple gun now.

Anzu:have one.

Gamemaster:Dumb.

Anzu:Josh, I forget, for some reason I feel like he doesn't sell potions.

Gamemaster:He doesn't sell potions.

Anzu:Okay.

Gamemaster:Yeah, no, if you want potions, you have to go to, like, a pharmacist.

Arctos:Alright, I'm good.

Benny:Do you have a poly tool in stock?

Gamemaster:Uh, I do if you wanted to buy another one, if you already lost your old one.

Benny:I died.

Benny:So I lost everything.

Gamemaster:I mean, I don't know what the specifics around dying are.

Gamemaster:It's possible you just wake up with your stuff again.

Gamemaster:But sure, if you want to buy another poly tool, you can buy another poly tool.

Arctos:You can take it out of the group fund if you're willing to sell it at the end of this.

Benny:Okay.

Benny:Can I get a crushing rune on that as well?

Benny:I'm selling it anyways.

Benny:If I get the original one back.

Anzu:Fine with me.

Johnny:Yeah, give whatever you need, like over here.

Arctos:Yeah, we're going to invest in the murder.

Gamemaster:Yeah, if you want to purchase a poly tool with crushing, you can do so.

Arctos:Oh, I forgot to add the weapon striking rune that we have now.

Gamemaster:That'd be... Yeah, you're at level 4.

Arctos:We got this.

Gamemaster:Your weapon's got buffed.

Arctos:I forgot to add that.

Benny:Oh.

Arctos:I don't know if it's in the https://btl.iridi.cc.

Gamemaster:Found you automatically, Ansel.

Arctos:OK, cool.

Benny:we just want to do a 200 gold distribution to everyone all right everyone give yourselves 200 gold and i will buy my poly tool

Johnny:yeah let's do it there's no real ghosts so far um that was more just kind of me

Arctos:OK.

Arctos:Did I get a ghost touch?

Arctos:You guys are mentioning ghosts.

Arctos:Gotcha, gotcha.

Benny:I don't think I need much else.

Johnny:I also get... Smiler, do you have a Drum of War?

Benny:I mean, I have other loner gear, but it's loner gear, so I don't have to give it back until we kill.

Gamemaster:Let me check in the back.

Anzu:Just got this one in yesterday.

Arctos:I'm going to get a reinforcing minor rune for my shield.

Arctos:10%, you said?

Gamemaster:Yeah, I do have a Drunk of War.

Gamemaster:I actually have a full set of Coda.

Johnny:Oh, that's pretty neat.

Gamemaster:And present.

Arctos:Oh, yeah.

Arctos:I'm going to buy a minor reinforcing rune.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Arctos:Fields?

Gamemaster:I thought that might be part of the automatic rune progression table, but it's not.

Gamemaster:Shields just are it.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:No, I got it before as a champion because you can get a thing that automatically... Yeah, okay.

Gamemaster:I know the champion gave you that feat, but I had assumed that at some point you would also get it from that progression, and I guess you don't.

Arctos:No, and it's really nice.

Arctos:It changes my breakpoint from 10 to 32.

Anzu:Whoa.

Gamemaster:Nice.

Arctos:Yeah.

Anzu:Is that something that I should have had last campaign?

Arctos:I think Josh was giving him to you.

Gamemaster:Yeah, as part of the shields that you were getting, they were just getting the group associated with it.

Arctos:Like, along the way.

Anzu:Oh.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:When you have special shields, they usually throw in a rune and then mine take a rune away from the slots.

Gamemaster:Part of it is that they changed how shields work with the GM core.

Gamemaster:It used to be like you had better versions of shields, and now you have a shield and better versions of rubies that go on the shield.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:And I also remember at one point, Big Fish crit on some really good crafting check, so you let Tanner get a reinforcing something before it... Yeah.

Johnny:I think it was on the boat.

Arctos:Yeah, yeah.

Arctos:Are there any good armor runes?

Johnny:Yeah, I will buy a Drum of War.

Arctos:No.

Gamemaster:Technically, you have to take a long rest with the staff in order to make it do stuff, but we can just have you do that when it can.

Johnny:Okay.

Arctos:I know the judge was okay with killing people.

Arctos:Is the host also okay with just rule a law of fucking killing gangsters?

Gamemaster:None of the outer gods have any particular edicts towards killing people, with the exception of the Eternal Pulse, which seeks to extend everybody's life.

Arctos:No.

Gamemaster:And even then, like, if you're killing somebody else to extend your own life, that's fine.

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:And there are lots of ways to swing an encounter as this is to extend my own life.

Arctos:Cool.

Gamemaster:All of the gods in the setting, all of the outer gods at least, very much take a... You are absolutely allowed to and even encouraged to negotiate and find loopholes in the edicts to make them work in the way that best works for you, if that makes sense.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Okay.

Johnny:Thank you.

Arctos:And then can banners go over shields, or how does that work?

Gamemaster:One second.

Gamemaster:Don't remember the rules for banners off the top of my head.

Gamemaster:Banner, banner, banner, banner, banner.

Gamemaster:I believe, yeah, it just has to be affixed.

Gamemaster:So you can affix it to your person.

Gamemaster:You don't need to actually.

Arctos:I will buy a Blazing Banner for 100 gold if he has it.

Arctos:It's uncommon, so.

Gamemaster:Yeah, what I'm going to say is, somebody roll a d100 for me.

Gamemaster:If it is a 60 or higher, he has this in stock.

Arctos:Hmm.

Benny:you called boom funny number it's funny for me

Johnny:Does he sell spell scrolls?

Arctos:Hmm.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:He has it in stock.

Gamemaster:That's not the funny number anymore.

Arctos:Yeah, I will get a Blazing Banner and affix it to my shield.

Gamemaster:It's been usurped.

Gamemaster:So, yes.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:No.

Johnny:Okay.

Benny:He sells spell scrolls by the seashore.

Johnny:Smile or smile?

Gamemaster:Smiler sells by the seashore.

Benny:Smiler sells spell scrolls.

Gamemaster:It's fine.

Arctos:How do I add runes to something?

Gamemaster:In what?

Gamemaster:On Foundry, if you have the item in your inventory, you go into the inventory tab, which is the one that looks like a cardboard box.

Arctos:Like, on Foundry.

Arctos:Yep.

Gamemaster:You hit the edit item button, which is on the right.

Gamemaster:It's the pencil.

Gamemaster:And then from there, you go to details and you scroll down to property room first and you can set it there.

Arctos:Gotcha, gotcha.

Johnny:Nice.

Arctos:Cool, cool, cool.

Arctos:Thank you, thank you.

Arctos:And is material there as well for my sword?

Gamemaster:Yes, you can use that to change the material to a silver weapon if you had your weapon silvered.

Arctos:Precious metal.

Arctos:Silver at low grade.

Arctos:And our banner, where are the banners?

Gamemaster:Let me see if they even have the banners.

Gamemaster:Which one is this, the blazing banner?

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:It adds D4 fire to crits.

Johnny:That's really nice.

Gamemaster:It's considered equipment.

Arctos:Cool.

Arctos:I see it's there.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:Great.

Johnny:Excellent.

Arctos:I'm ready to go.

Arctos:Should we go kill the deer?

Benny:as well the aob banner pf2e banners

Arctos:Or do we wait till night?

Gamemaster:What is the?

Gamemaster:What is the area of a banner?

Arctos:I don't.

Gamemaster:Yeah, what's the area of banner?

Gamemaster:Because everybody within the area, that means that when you crit, you deal persistent fire damage, but I don't know what the distance is for the aura.

Johnny:Blazing banner.

Benny:blazing banner aura I think it's just the whole universe that was just joking

Johnny:Not so interesting.

Gamemaster:It's a 30-foot emanation.

Gamemaster:I found the rule set.

Gamemaster:It's a 30-foot emanation.

Gamemaster:It is not the whole universe.

Johnny:Any time this happens to any of us.

Gamemaster:Magical banners can be affixed to a weapon or shield you are wielding, attached to a simple pole or handle and held in one hand, or worn affixed to a pole in your backpack.

Arctos:Thank you.

Gamemaster:The thing that you have holding the banner can also support a talisman, if you have one of those.

Gamemaster:If a creature drops the banner, nobody gets the effect.

Johnny:Oh, no.

Johnny:I lost all my... See, I lost all my weapons.

Gamemaster:If you're under the... Oh, sorry.

Johnny:I can hold the banner if you guys want.

Gamemaster:It can be a fixed hands-free to somebody's shield or whatever, so you don't need to give up a hand for it.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Also, if you're being affected by two banners at the same time, you can only be affected by one, so you choose whoever you're most loyal to, and then that's whose banner it applies to you.

Johnny:Okay.

Arctos:You want the banner?

Anzu:Yeah, I'd like to pick up a couple healing potions.

Johnny:Mindbird.

Arctos:It did kind of make it look like the host, though, so you'd have to deal with that.

Johnny:No, I think it should be always within range of you and Benjamin.

Arctos:Burning aura.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Arctos:Shall we?

Johnny:Anything?

Arctos:Go deer hunting.

Johnny:Anything?

Arctos:And.

Johnny:To the potion shop!

Benny:Of course.

Johnny:If there's a spell store, like a spell scroll store too, I'd like to stop there.

Gamemaster:You can do both of those things.

Gamemaster:The closest pharmacy is Ye Olde Apothecary, spelled Y-E-O-L-D-E.

Gamemaster:It's a relatively new company.

Gamemaster:They do offer a number of potions and cosmetics, some foodstuffs.

Gamemaster:If you have a prescription from a doctor, you can get regular medicine, all that kind of stuff.

Gamemaster:Full price, whatever's listed, fourth level and below potions you can acquire here.

Gamemaster:You just don't get the 10% discount from Smiler Ons.

Anzu:Yeah, I'm going to buy two lesser healing potions.

Anzu:They're level three.

Gamemaster:That's totally fine.

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:And then same deal.

Gamemaster:You can find a shop that both offers, it doesn't actually apply to this party, I believe, but if you guys end up ever playing a character that needs to write down spells, there are stores.

Gamemaster:Do you actually do, do bards need to do that?

Johnny:Because I took a new feat, Esoteric Polymath, I now have a spell book that I can add to my repertoire once a day.

Arctos:You can attach it up.

Johnny:I would like to copy the spell Calm.

Gamemaster:Nice.

Gamemaster:So there is a store which will, for a fee, allow you to copy spells from them, and they do also, as a service, sell spell scrolls.

Johnny:It's a second level spell.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:It is seven gold pieces to acquire a second level spell.

Benny:Thank you.

Johnny:Great.

Johnny:I will... Yes.

Gamemaster:The pricing for acquiring spells is in one of the pinned messages.

Gamemaster:I can relink it.

Johnny:Yeah, basically once a day, I get to either add an additional spell to my repertoire, or if the spell's already there, I can set an additional signature spell.

Arctos:Clerics can also learn for the uncommon and rare if I don't select one while leveling up.

Johnny:That's pretty cool.

Arctos:But I don't get to have a spell book, I don't believe.

Arctos:Clerics can use to learn.

Gamemaster:Oh, you just... Is that how that works?

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Because I know clerics... Yeah, oh.

Gamemaster:Common spells on the divine spell list or other divine spells to which you gain access and learn via learn a spell.

Gamemaster:Correct.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:So you can learn a spell and then at the beginning of the day you just assign from the divine list into your slots.

Arctos:Arctos does not.

Benny:I also grabbed two lesser healing potions.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:Hell yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:I'm going to grab some actually over here.

Arctos:Arctos would rather die.

Arctos:Than drink a potion?

Johnny:What?

Gamemaster:Then consume a potion.

Arctos:A health potion?

Arctos:I got these two paws right here.

Arctos:You're telling me.

Gamemaster:I will...

Gamemaster:Just for the sake of being strange again, health potions and potions of the like in this game, some of them are liquids like you would expect, but advances in modern medical science mean that some of them are pills.

Johnny:Oh, no.

Anzu:We do not want our children gaining hit points.

Gamemaster:No mechanical difference, it's just they're pills now.

Gamemaster:I'm just imagining you like walking around with like a small pill bottle and like a thing of Pepto Bismol with the cap on top and then that's the health potion.

Gamemaster:Potions have child safety locks now.

Johnny:We give kids guns, but they have child safety.

Arctos:Alright.

Johnny:Not if I have anything to say about it.

Arctos:Cool.

Arctos:I'll take a healing potion, I guess.

Gamemaster:I thought you would rather die.

Arctos:I would, but... I might as well take one.

Benny:His came the pleasures of Herald.

Gamemaster:I will note as well that the pharmacy is currently holding a sale, as these pharmacies tend to do.

Gamemaster:This one's on soldier syrup because they're trying to get people to buy it.

Gamemaster:They made too many.

Gamemaster:They're overstocked.

Gamemaster:So it's 25% off any soldier syrups.

Anzu:I've never even heard of soldier syrup.

Johnny:Soldier's Syrup.

Benny:In hell, no soldier is here.

Arctos:What does it do?

Johnny:This thick syrup sweetens potions and creates a distinctive metallic flavor associated with the festival days.

Johnny:Partygoers are fond of... Activating a dose of Soldier's Syrup requires you to mix it with another consumable potion that takes one action to activate.

Johnny:After swallowing the mixture...

Johnny:Within one minute... When consumed, a soldier's syrup augmented potion does not immediately grant you its benefits.

Johnny:Instead, you can activate the potion within the next hour as a single action, which has the concentrate trait.

Johnny:You can have only one soldier's syrup augmented potion consumed at a time.

Johnny:That's pretty cool.

Johnny:So basically, we could delay a healing potion until we need it.

Johnny:I will buy one of those, actually.

Arctos:How many is that?

Arctos:How much is that?

Gamemaster:It depends on what kind you want.

Gamemaster:A minor one is three gold pieces.

Gamemaster:A lesser one is eight gold pieces.

Arctos:Alright, I'll buy one of those.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:I'll get two of those, actually.

Gamemaster:The point of them are just for delayed release for potions.

Gamemaster:So if you want to be able to take a potion without visibly taking a potion, you can do that.

Gamemaster:Or if you just want to have something on tap as an action trigger without needing to pull it out of a bag or something like that.

Johnny:Definitely do that.

Arctos:I'll buy two of those because they're on sale.

Benny:Wait, how much off?

Gamemaster:It's normally four gold pieces.

Gamemaster:It's on sale for three.

Benny:Three, but I have lesser healing potions, so I need to get the lessers.

Gamemaster:Oh, so, yeah, it's 25% off.

Gamemaster:So it'd be nine gold pieces for the lessors.

Benny:I'll get one.

Arctos:Maybe I should get a potion of invisibility.

Arctos:Put the syrup in it.

Johnny:That's pretty cool.

Arctos:Mid-fight.

Arctos:Turn fucking invisible.

Johnny:That's pretty cool.

Anzu:Sick, yeah.

Arctos:That is really cool.

Benny:Mm hmm.

Arctos:Yeah.

Anzu:I'm going to buy four potions of emergency escape and hand out one each to the party.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Anzu:Just in case things go wrong again.

Arctos:All right.

Johnny:What?

Anzu:So you could all note that down.

Arctos:All right.

Johnny:It wouldn't happen.

Johnny:It wouldn't happen twice.

Anzu:Note it down.

Anzu:Potion of emergency escape.

Arctos:Cool.

Johnny:Thank you, Mindbird.

Arctos:Thank you, MindBode.

Gamemaster:Hmm.

Anzu:You're welcome.

Anzu:I hope this will prevent...

Anzu:For the destruction.

Arctos:Do talismans wear off when you use it if it doesn't say that?

Johnny:I think it's .

Gamemaster:I believe so as well.

Anzu:I think they're all one-time use.

Johnny:Yeah.

Anzu:Unless it's a spell heart, which kind of gets categorized in the same area.

Arctos:Okay.

Arctos:So then I won't do that.

Arctos:All right.

Gamemaster:Yeah, talismans are consumable.

Gamemaster:You affix it, you get some benefit.

Anzu:They are handy.

Anzu:Some of them are neat.

Johnny:There's some real fun ones.

Arctos:Yeah.

Anzu:There's a couple, and I don't know if we're high enough level for it, but there's some that...

Anzu:will buff your crit.

Anzu:Like if you crit on an attack, it does another thing.

Anzu:That's a good one to have on there.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:Let's see, what ones can we get at this level?

Arctos:Okay, I'm ready.

Gamemaster:It's part of the trait description.

Gamemaster:I was trying to find where it specified that a talisman was consumable.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Everything with the talisman trait once activated burns out permanently.

Arctos:Gotcha.

Johnny:There's a pebble, which makes an object take 10 less damage.

Johnny:Might be good for your shield.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:The fortifying pebble.

Johnny:Fortifying pebble.

Johnny:There's a fear gem.

Johnny:A couple of these are useful for you guys.

Johnny:I think I'm good to go.

Arctos:I'll get the Fortifying Pebble, and then that's it.

Arctos:That's all my gold.

Gamemaster:13 gold pieces or that you could get at Smiler Shop, so minus 10%.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Cool.

Johnny:Yeah.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:I'm ready.

Arctos:Shall we go scope out the address we were given?

Arctos:I brought my trench coat and hat.

Arctos:They will never see me coming.

Johnny:Where did Arctos go?

Benny:Very smart.

Johnny:We'll never find him.

Gamemaster:Okay, so equipped, having received things that you wanted to purchase, all of that kind of stuff, your next step is to go to the address that Aut gave you, correct?

Arctos:incognito-like, I probably will not go with them.

Gamemaster:Well, incognito as in are you taking the car or are you walking?

Johnny:I think we're walking probably the cars.

Benny:Can someone make Benny... Can Benny actually make himself a makeshift poncho with a hood?

Arctos:I think Johnny should change some clothes and walk along the street.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Very just nonchalant-like.

Johnny:Oh, I gotta change my outfit.

Johnny:All right.

Gamemaster:What do you mean?

Arctos:Yes.

Johnny:I'll, uh,

Benny:There's like a rag or a towel or something.

Arctos:Or just buy one?

Gamemaster:Makeshift contract of what?

Arctos:Why don't you just buy a poncho?

Gamemaster:I can have you make a crafting check.

Benny:How much for ponchos?

Gamemaster:How good do you think Benny is at sewing?

Arctos:How much is a poncho?

Benny:He's elite.

Gamemaster:It's got to be really cheap.

Gamemaster:Okay, so a full set of clothing is one silver piece.

Gamemaster:So just a poncho, I'm going to make five copper.

Benny:What about a gunfighter's poncho?

Benny:This I feel like is reasonable for him to just find one on the ground.

Johnny:What?

Gamemaster:What is a gunfighter's poncho?

Benny:It's a Pathfinder 1 item that's 14,000 gold.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:Oh, okay.

Benny:All right, Benny will just... What, a silver?

Gamemaster:So... I don't even know what happened.

Johnny:That's insane.

Gamemaster:I'm reading the description for Gunfighter's Poncho, and I don't know what it means because I don't know how to translate them into Pathfinder 2-y things.

Gamemaster:It gives you a plus two luck bonus to touch AC, and once a day is an immediate action, you can negate a single ranged targeted attack, but you can't use the ability if it's a confirmed critical hit.

Arctos:No women played that game, Josh.

Gamemaster:When you use the ability, you must fall prone.

Gamemaster:What's interesting is all of the 1E descriptions are written talking about a he.

Gamemaster:Like, if he uses this item, he must fall prone.

Gamemaster:And I don't know why they wrote it with that perspective.

Gamemaster:Not even like the he, she, whatever.

Benny:Because... Because we're not the characters.

Gamemaster:Like, 2E things are, if you use this item, you must do A, B, and C. This one's talking about, oh yeah, if that guy does it, he's gotta fall down.

Benny:Josh, this is a game, alright?

Benny:I don't have this poncho.

Benny:My character, on the other hand, he might use it.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Right, of course.

Gamemaster:Yeah, it's five copper pieces if you want to purchase a poncho.

Benny:Five copper.

Benny:God, I'm going to keep doing these exchanges.

Arctos:Mind Bird and I will just chill somewhere else, right?

Johnny:I'll go with Benny while he gets a poncho.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Are you going to get a poncho too?

Johnny:Yeah, I guess I'll get a poncho too, but mine's a little more colorful.

Gamemaster:It is raining.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:So that's another five.

Gamemaster:I'll hold, because Smiler's discount, it's nine copper pieces for two ponchos.

Arctos:Cool.

Johnny:All right, great.

Benny:Perfect.

Arctos:I'll get a poncho too, and I'll cover Mind Birds.

Johnny:Can we get matching ponchos?

Arctos:That way, when we do make the entrance in, we'll all come in in ponchos.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:It's 18 copper pieces for four ponchos.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:We're going to walk in like the Poncho Brothers.

Johnny:We're the poncho gang.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Benny:gang.

Benny:What, they're like the full hat gang?

Gamemaster:Pee gang.

Anzu:No.

Arctos:Birds can't pee.

Arctos:Yeah, birds can't pee.

Gamemaster:Mind bird and the pee gang.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:No, but wait, what kind of, what, they're like the full hat gang?

Benny:What are they called?

Benny:The full head of hair gang?

Gamemaster:The Roundhats.

Benny:Roundhats.

Johnny:We're the poncho gang.

Gamemaster:Yes, the full hat of hair gang.

Gamemaster:When have you ever heard anyone say a full hat of hair?

Benny:Several times, but I don't want to point them out to save them embarrassment.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:Josh, I have a specific image of what my new outfit looks like.

Gamemaster:Fair.

Johnny:Give me one moment.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Is it denim?

Johnny:No, it's not denim.

Gamemaster:Oh, okay.

Johnny:I have a round hat.

Gamemaster:Oh, sure.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Great.

Benny:They have to.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Do they make denim ponchos?

Gamemaster:Now... I don't know if that's a thing.

Johnny:Definitely get that.

Gamemaster:I just kind of assumed.

Johnny:because they make them in all the companies.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you all got ponchos, but only Benny and Johnny are going to Widdershins to the address to scope out the place.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:Case to place.

Arctos:Yes.

Gamemaster:Okay, I'm still nickel and diming you guys since you're taking the tram.

Gamemaster:It was two silver pieces per person to get here, and then it's going to be another two silver pieces for the two of you going to Widdershins.

Gamemaster:and then another two silver pieces to go back to wherever you're going.

Gamemaster:You don't have a car, so I'm going to slowly bleed you of money.

Johnny:Okay.

Arctos:That was good.

Gamemaster:Roll, I guess, a stealth check for the two of you to blend in, and then a perception check as you walk by.

Johnny:I got a 22 stealth in my new poncho.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:Let me check my stuff.

Arctos:Well, this is happening.

Benny:26.

Arctos:Arctos is talking to

Arctos:our bird friend and trying to draw pictures of what our new car should be outfitted with.

Arctos:And one of them has a rocket launcher and then also a net gun.

Anzu:Okay, okay.

Gamemaster:Okay, so what did we get for the perceptions and stealths?

Johnny:I'm going to use a new feat.

Johnny:Let's try that again, and I will reroll that perception.

Johnny:That's much better.

Benny:Okay.

Johnny:29 perception.

Benny:As perception beats.

Gamemaster:So what did we get?

Johnny:22 stealth.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:And 22 perception, 26 stealth.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you guys blend in pretty well into the people of it.

Gamemaster:Blended's probably not the right term.

Gamemaster:I think it's more you just don't draw attention as you're walking through.

Gamemaster:Anchor Boulevard, the street that the address is on, is a relatively busy one.

Gamemaster:It's one of the larger streets that passes through Widdershins, so you see a lot of through traffic, not people necessarily stopping.

Gamemaster:And 412 Anchor Boulevard, the address you were given, is in fact... What?

Arctos:Tywelwyn.

Arctos:12 Boulevard and Tywelwyn.

Gamemaster:Mr. Tywelwyn is at, it appears, a Gas-n-Go℠ auto body shop.

Arctos:Yeah, if I can do it.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Um...

Gamemaster:It's the middle of the day, so it's open.

Gamemaster:There are a few gas pumps out front, and there's a garage off to the side that it looks like you can pull into if you need some work done on your vehicle.

Gamemaster:There are three bays in the garage.

Gamemaster:You can see that two of them are currently occupied.

Gamemaster:One of them is occupied with a car that you are familiar with.

Gamemaster:Because it is your car.

Gamemaster:You see the City Tripper is currently on one of those mechanized hoists.

Gamemaster:It's like five-ish feet off of the ground.

Gamemaster:It looks like it's in the middle of some kind of work that they're doing on it.

Gamemaster:You're not quite sure what at this distance, what modifications they're making to the car.

Gamemaster:But it's undergoing some work.

Gamemaster:Looking into the shop from the distance that you're in, just kind of like across the street, casing it, you can identify at least three people moving around in there.

Gamemaster:Nobody's wearing the bowler hats associated with the Roundhat Gang, so you see a few people wearing uniforms, though, that look like they're associated with the...

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Gas-n-Go℠.

Gamemaster:It's not super easy, especially at this distance, to try and figure out if they are associated with the gang or if they just work for the shop.

Gamemaster:As for the building itself, it is a relatively small building.

Gamemaster:There's the...

Gamemaster:like awning out front where the gas pumps are and then the building itself, uh, which is just, uh, uh, like an auto body shop and a counter.

Gamemaster:It's not like one of those integrated grocery store things.

Gamemaster:Um, the, it's one story.

Gamemaster:Uh, it just takes up like maybe a hundred feet across all told.

Gamemaster:Uh, it's not connected to the buildings on either side of it.

Gamemaster:So there are alleys, uh, to the left and right of this building.

Gamemaster:Um,

Gamemaster:You can see from the opposite side of the road that the left side of the building has what looks to be some dumpsters out back and what you would imagine is a service entrance.

Johnny:If we watch it for like an hour or so, does anyone we recognize enter or leave?

Benny:87.

Gamemaster:Roll a d100 for me.

Johnny:Mike, I believe this is your specialty.

Gamemaster:Okay, within 87, around... If you're waiting for, like, an hour, I think it's near the end of the hour, you would see... You don't, like, see who gets into the car, but one of the cars, not your car, pulls out of the garage while you're watching, and the giveaway there that it...

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:There's some information to be had there.

Gamemaster:The rain hitting the roof of the car sizzles as it pulls out and goes by.

Anzu:Hot.

Arctos:I like that.

Johnny:Semi locker now.

Benny:Shall we wait for nighttime?

Johnny:Yeah, we go back and get the.

Arctos:So.

Johnny:Get the bear on the bird.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Benny:Yes.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:That's going to be another two silver pieces from each of you to go back, and then two silver pieces from everybody to return to Widdershins.

Arctos:Sounds good.

Johnny:Oh, God.

Johnny:Okay.

Anzu:Josh, I'm so sorry.

Anzu:Was I supposed to spend silver on some earlier trips?

Anzu:Just the one?

Anzu:Okay, okay.

Gamemaster:It was two silver to get two smilers, and then from there you guys were walking around doing shopping.

Benny:So we're at like six silver total, I guess, for Benny and Johnny.

Gamemaster:It's four silver for the two that didn't scope, and it's eight silver for the two that did.

Benny:Okay.

Johnny:Okay.

Benny:Do we want to...

Benny:walk there we want to drive there okay

Johnny:I mean... I think we should walk and take the car back.

Arctos:It would be pretty badass to roll up and be like, hey, can you do some work on my car?

Arctos:Oh, I think that's my other car.

Arctos:But I think we should walk.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:So the prices I gave you were if you were walking.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I didn't realize that the car might be coming into play.

Anzu:I don't think the car's been in play.

Johnny:Now we're walking.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:So we should jump them at 3 AM, like the normal?

Arctos:If I'm a little drunk, little shifty.

Johnny:That does seem like our MO.

Benny:We should also, can we?

Johnny:Something to think about.

Johnny:We know that he has two simulacrums currently.

Johnny:One of them is out, so we should watch for any of them to come back.

Arctos:He had a he's an artifact.

Arctos:that he uses to control them, but if he leaves, they disappear, right?

Johnny:I think so.

Arctos:Okay.

Arctos:Oh, wait, I should... He checks.

Benny:Take note of the car that we saw leaving, because we're going to be going back to get the rest of the group before we stake out for the evening, just to have another check to see if he came back.

Gamemaster:Absolutely, you can take note of it.

Gamemaster:Just keep Anaïs out to see the returns.

Arctos:Bone shaker, sudden blight.

Arctos:All right, I can make a perception check.

Gamemaster:Okay, so if you guys are camping out semi-nearby, I'd like a perception check from somebody if you're just keeping Anaïs out for comings and goings.

Johnny:I will aid the bear.

Johnny:That's a... I got a 28 to aid the bear.

Benny:Hey, to the bear.

Arctos:I can, I'll hear a point out.

Arctos:And then, so we are, sorry, let me just check what I have.

Gamemaster:That's a success.

Arctos:I am trained, so it's plus eight.

Arctos:33.

Arctos:34.

Gamemaster:Is that plus the one you got from the aid?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:With a 34, keeping the comings and goings of the Gas-n-Go℠, just kind of monitoring the situation there.

Gamemaster:Around...

Gamemaster:8ish p.m.

Gamemaster:You see the last of the employees for this Gas-n-Go℠ lock up and leave.

Gamemaster:And then about two hours later, another car pulls up and out of it step some very obviously members of the Roundhat Gang of different animal flavors who enter the building.

Johnny:Thank you.

Arctos:Sorry.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Arctos:So first, what time did the normal people leave?

Gamemaster:Eight.

Arctos:And when did the round hat came coming?

Gamemaster:Like, ten-ish.

Arctos:And then we heard there was four people guarding him.

Gamemaster:At the time that you asked, there were four people guarding him, and one of them was Hlarf.

Arctos:And one of them might be Hlarf, or whatever his name is.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:What is it now?

Anzu:We have no way of knowing.

Arctos:I mean, how many people left?

Gamemaster:Why would I tell you that?

Arctos:Like, how many people came out of this car, I'm assuming?

Gamemaster:Oh, you saw four people come out of this car.

Arctos:Cool.

Gamemaster:But it's also been almost 48 hours since you asked how many people were guarding him.

Arctos:No, no, no.

Arctos:I'm just wondering if they're keeping the same amount of gang members right now.

Johnny:And do they go in the front door or the service door?

Gamemaster:Sure.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:OK.

Gamemaster:They had a key.

Gamemaster:They just walked in the front door.

Anzu:Luckily, we also have a key.

Anzu:But are we thinking service door?

Anzu:Well... Before the backup comes in for the night.

Arctos:Wait, you guys are going to attack tonight?

Benny:Why not?

Arctos:I think we wait till tomorrow and we attack at 8 to 15.

Johnny:Oh, that's pretty smart.

Benny:Sure.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:Yeah.

Anzu:You have a great mind for strategy, Arctos.

Arctos:I'm very wise.

Johnny:We need that in this group.

Arctos:That being said, it will give them an extra day to realize that

Arctos:Hlarf is missing, but I think they already know he's missing.

Anzu:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:I still think it's a good idea.

Arctos:Let's wait till tomorrow, 8:15.

Johnny:Yeah.

Benny:Sure.

Johnny:That's the only thing I do.

Anzu:So what should we?

Arctos:There still might be guards, but there'll probably be less people.

Anzu:Right.

Anzu:I guess should we go home?

Arctos:Another four silver.

Benny:No, we're walking home.

Gamemaster:Two per.

Benny:We walked here.

Gamemaster:You can't walk from here to home.

Gamemaster:Or you can, but it'd take like two hours.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Okay, yeah, we'll do that.

Arctos:And then tomorrow we'll take the train again.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you spent two hours taking a very leisurely stroll through the rain from where you are in ponchos back to the Sin and Tonic to save two silver a person.

Arctos:In ponchos.

Johnny:That's probably would do it.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Which does, I guess, put a price on one hour's worth of your work is worth one silver.

Gamemaster:Good to know.

Arctos:Yep.

Gamemaster:At most, I suppose.

Arctos:Yeah, if we work 40 hours a week, we make two gold.

Gamemaster:Four gold?

Gamemaster:Four gold, not bad.

Arctos:Yeah, we'll make 2,000 silver a year.

Gamemaster:Either way, you...

Johnny:We rest.

Gamemaster:Trudge home, and you can get yourselves a rest in as you wait for tomorrow.

Arctos:We rest.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Arctos:We repeat it tomorrow, but we strike earlier.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:We rest.

Gamemaster:So you... Are you taking the train back to the Gas-n-Go℠, or are you walking another two hours back?

Benny:Sure.

Anzu:We can take the train today.

Arctos:All right, we'll take the train.

Johnny:We leave at 6 p.m.

Anzu:Come on.

Arctos:All right.

Johnny:instead of we get there at 8.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:We can take the train.

Gamemaster:It's two silver a person if you take the train.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:It's two hours if you walk, but either way, you can make it to the Gas-n-Go℠ in the neighborhood, like across the river.

Gamemaster:And you're waiting until the store closes up for the night, but before the...

Arctos:Cool.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:No checks necessary.

Gamemaster:I imagine... I'm assuming one of you has a pocket watch of some kind, so you can tell at the time.

Arctos:I have a monocle.

Arctos:Of course I have a pocket watch.

Gamemaster:Those aren't associated necessarily, but okay.

Johnny:It's actually one long chain from the monocle to the pocket.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Of course.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:You check your monocle watch and you wait until they close up.

Gamemaster:Until, you know, it's about 8.15 now.

Gamemaster:The store is closed.

Gamemaster:It is still raining.

Gamemaster:You are standing across from.

Arctos:Let's go.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Are you guys being stealthy about this?

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Because if you are, I'd love some stealth checks.

Arctos:All right.

Benny:I'd love to make one.

Benny:I would love to succeed on one.

Arctos:You know whammies.

Arctos:Oh, yes.

Arctos:That's really good for me.

Arctos:Oh, yeah.

Johnny:Yes.

Gamemaster:Okay, I see a crit 28 from Noah, 12 from Tanner, 21 from Jorge.

Johnny:I don't know if you need it.

Arctos:Tanner, we know you have an extra hero point.

Arctos:We saw that one earlier.

Anzu:I'll do it.

Anzu:I was just thinking about it.

Anzu:Jeez.

Gamemaster:Wow.

Johnny:I feel like it's rolled pretty well.

Johnny:I feel like I don't know.

Arctos:All right, well, if you don't want to, but... Eight.

Anzu:I don't know how the group roles work, because I'm just going to add what... Oh, gosh.

Benny:Thank you.

Anzu:Is it six or eight from trains to... I did a lot better.

Gamemaster:Eight.

Gamemaster:But for you, six.

Gamemaster:Wow.

Arctos:Oh!

Anzu:I did a lot better.

Gamemaster:Wow.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Arctos:He's light as a feather.

Gamemaster:You guys are the stealthiest you have ever been as a party and as individuals in ponchos.

Arctos:Ponchos!

Johnny:Matching punches.

Gamemaster:In the matching... Are they matching ponchos?

Gamemaster:Does everybody look like Clotiswood?

Benny:We all got them from the same place, so...

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Four very sized, various species Clint Eastwoods sneak their way across the street towards the Gas-n-Go℠.

Gamemaster:What is the game plan here?

Gamemaster:Where are you going?

Anzu:Well, firstly, we're all walking like Jorge walked in that one video he sent us a while ago.

Arctos:Yeah.

Anzu:I think service door, right?

Arctos:Slinking.

Gamemaster:You slink?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You all slink over to the gas station.

Gamemaster:What are you doing?

Johnny:from the store

Arctos:Try the keys to see if they work.

Benny:the service door.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you slink around the side of the building towards the service door.

Anzu:Service door.

Arctos:Yeah, server store, server store.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:You have two keys.

Gamemaster:You have a 50-50 shot of it working on the first try.

Gamemaster:It doesn't.

Gamemaster:You try a second key.

Gamemaster:That does work.

Arctos:Cool.

Gamemaster:It seems that one of the two keys was for the service door.

Gamemaster:You hear a soft click, and the door swings open.

Gamemaster:You find yourselves in a small, I want to say like a mudroom of some kind.

Gamemaster:Like only enough for like two of you and then another door that goes further in, but it doesn't look like there's a door.

Gamemaster:Sorry, it doesn't look like there's a lock on the door moving further in.

Gamemaster:It's just kind of a separating partition from the rest of the building.

Gamemaster:You're allowed to try that door too, if you like.

Anzu:Wait, do we hear anything from beyond the door?

Benny:Okay.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:I will take it.

Gamemaster:Roll a perception check.

Gamemaster:Roll a perception check if you hear anything from beyond the door.

Arctos:24.

Gamemaster:Okay, a 30 is a success, so you do get a 24.

Johnny:will aid the bear in perceiving.

Johnny:I have aided the bear in perceiving.

Johnny:Yeah, 30 to aid the bear.

Gamemaster:24.

Gamemaster:You put your ear up to the door.

Gamemaster:You start listening in.

Arctos:And the...

Arctos:And the floor, because I know he's in the basement.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Gamemaster:You put your ear up to the door and the floor, not simultaneously, and you give a listen.

Gamemaster:You don't hear anything on the same level as you.

Gamemaster:If there's anything here, they're being pretty quiet.

Gamemaster:You put your ear to the floor, and you do hear this...

Gamemaster:It's a rhythmic, almost fluid-like sound, like some kind of pneumatic or piping system underneath the floor.

Arctos:Oh, yeah.

Arctos:Let's go down.

Arctos:By the way, Josh, just calling this out now.

Arctos:I changed when I prepared my spells.

Arctos:I'm locked into these.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:I don't know if you get notifications when I change it, so I don't want to.

Gamemaster:I do not.

Arctos:OK, I'm just calling this out.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you're free to change, and I'll have no idea what happened.

Arctos:OK, so I'm calling out.

Arctos:I put Dispel Magic now so that I'm just putting that out and obviously the other ones.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Yeah, that's fine.

Arctos:But I'm not going to be like, holy, I had this prepared.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Johnny:Does everyone have their soldier serum potions ready to go?

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah, I will... It's one action to use a healing potion anyway, right?

Gamemaster:It's two.

Gamemaster:One to take it out of your bag and then one to drink it.

Arctos:Yeah, I'll use one.

Johnny:With the soldier serum.

Arctos:I have two soldiers, so I'll use one of them on my healing potions because I ended up buying two.

Gamemaster:Unless you have, like, there are items that let you, like, quick retrieve potions and stuff, but I don't think any of you have gotten those, so.

Arctos:No, I don't have that.

Arctos:So yeah, I will use... I have two healing potions.

Benny:Same.

Arctos:I'll use one of them and then the soldier.

Johnny:Yeah, I will use a healing potion on the soldier too.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:the retaliations aren't good at this level and they don't apply to melee attacks yet yeah you need moderate I think for it to apply to melee attacks

Arctos:I was going to buy a retaliation, but I was like, eh, I forgot.

Arctos:All right, let's go.

Arctos:Yeah, it's 1D4.

Gamemaster:Okay, you guys are potioned up.

Arctos:Good to know.

Arctos:Gotcha, gotcha.

Arctos:All right, well.

Arctos:Let's go.

Gamemaster:You... Oh, actually, you know what?

Gamemaster:Are any of you on https://btl.iridi.cc.aridi.cc?

Arctos:Yes.

Johnny:Yes.

Anzu:I have not yet.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Nope.

Benny:you you

Johnny:A new map.

Gamemaster:Had you not done some reconnaissance when you entered here, this map would have people in it, but there are no people around right now, so you guys can just see what it looks like at the inside of the Gas-n-Go℠, just so I don't waste a map.

Arctos:Is that our car?

Gamemaster:This is your car, yes.

Arctos:Yes, we know our escape plan.

Johnny:Yeah.

Arctos:All right.

Anzu:Well, we need the key for the car.

Benny:Thank you.

Arctos:Yeah, is there a keys thing here?

Johnny:Yeah.

Johnny:We could check up the key.

Gamemaster:So, if you guys, while you're up in the space, if you'd like to... I assume, have you walked into the Gas-n-Go℠?

Arctos:Yeah, yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:So, yeah, you walk in, you find that this level is empty right now, which you knew from your reconnaissance outside.

Gamemaster:You can roll a perception check if you'd like to look around to see if there are the keys or whatever.

Arctos:I want to find keys in the opener.

Gamemaster:The opener?

Arctos:For the garage.

Gamemaster:Oh, sure.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:I'm just going to look for any other goals.

Arctos:You didn't want to guide me?

Benny:Yeah, Benny will guide.

Anzu:Oh, boy.

Gamemaster:Wait, does Arctos have guidance too?

Arctos:Oh!

Johnny:Benny has guidance?

Arctos:Maybe someone else should look.

Benny:Did you add the plus one?

Arctos:It's not worth it.

Johnny:I will also look around.

Arctos:I will guide you.

Johnny:I got a hero point.

Anzu:All right, so we're going to need a different escape plan.

Benny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Everybody in this party can guide or aid and just give buffs all around.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:It's ridiculous.

Anzu:But guidance isn't as good in this game.

Benny:your own eyes.

Benny:19.

Gamemaster:I mean, a plus one isn't like anything Disney's at.

Arctos:Yeah.

Anzu:But you can't spam it.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Johnny:You can spam aid, but it's a roll.

Gamemaster:You can spam aid.

Arctos:What was that role for Mike?

Gamemaster:Okay, so 19, what is that roll for?

Benny:Perception, because the other... Was I allowed to because the other two fucked, or no?

Gamemaster:You have to tell me what you're looking for.

Benny:Oh, um, what were the first two looking for?

Gamemaster:It sounded like they were looking for the keys to your car and the way to open the garage.

Benny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Easy enough to find the keys.

Gamemaster:There's like a little hook rack near the service counter that currently only has one set of keys on it, which you would immediately recognize as your own.

Arctos:Well, I hope it still runs.

Gamemaster:And the garage door has a latch that you have to pull to unlock it at the base from inside.

Gamemaster:And then there's a button on a rope or a wire that you can hit to open up the garage.

Gamemaster:It's not wireless, so somebody needs to...

Arctos:Guess we'll find out.

Arctos:All right, is there anything?

Anzu:Well, I think that we put the key in the ignition, but don't start it.

Arctos:Okay.

Johnny:Yeah.

Arctos:That way in case someone dies.

Arctos:All right.

Anzu:Just so that anyone can start the car.

Benny:okay okay so there's a basement there's no party in here though okay

Arctos:Is there a... Like an entrance to the... Do we see any things that go down?

Gamemaster:The back door that you can see on the map appears to head further below.

Gamemaster:There's no party in here, no.

Arctos:One shot.

Benny:Just because we walked in and it's just like, there has to be a basement.

Gamemaster:Uh-huh.

Benny:It's just like, Josh could be like, you guys hallucinated a basement.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:No, you knew that there was a basement here.

Benny:I know.

Gamemaster:You were informed by an all-knowing entity that there is a basement here.

Benny:But the two things we hallucinated... Actually, we've hallucinated three things.

Benny:Actually, I guess kind of two.

Benny:We've hallucinated extra levels in several structures, and we've hallucinated parties.

Gamemaster:You guys keep trying to go to the second floor of the Sin and Tonic, despite there never having been a second floor of the Sin and Tonic.

Benny:It's so cemented in my head that like, oh yeah, I leave my head down the stairs and I get eggs.

Benny:And it's like completely inconsequential.

Arctos:Literally, I was thinking Arctos had to drag his bare bed upstairs.

Gamemaster:He didn't have to do that.

Gamemaster:There are no stairs to the Sin and Tonic.

Johnny:Wait, how wide are the stairs?

Arctos:Alright.

Arctos:Let's go.

Anzu:Are there milkmen in this city?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Sorry?

Arctos:We gotta open the door.

Johnny:Oh, we gotta open the door.

Gamemaster:I missed what Tanner said.

Anzu:No.

Anzu:We're going to save my question for some more relevant time.

Gamemaster:Oh, okay.

Benny:It was dumb.

Benny:I didn't hear the full thing, but it was definitely dumb.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Good.

Gamemaster:Noah, your question was how wide are the stairs?

Johnny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Are you opening the door?

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Arctos:Yes.

Arctos:Check for traps.

Gamemaster:Yeah, well, who's checking for traps?

Benny:Do we want to ear check the door?

Johnny:In case there's someone on the other side.

Arctos:I can ear check the door.

Arctos:I'll ear check it.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you're listening for stuff that's going on beyond the... Can I get... Can you guys position yourselves for me, please, outside of the door, how you would be?

Anzu:Well, that was crazy.

Arctos:Wait, no, we already heard things downstairs.

Arctos:There's already things downstairs.

Benny:Oh, we eliminate the door.

Arctos:We know there's downstairs.

Arctos:I found it.

Arctos:So open the door!

Johnny:We removed the door.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Pick the door, Benny.

Benny:No, open the door.

Arctos:Well, I'll be next to Benny.

Arctos:I don't know.

Arctos:However close I can be to this door.

Gamemaster:Somebody has to be at the door to open it.

Arctos:Yeah, Benny's opening it.

Benny:Yeah, who is it?

Benny:Benny's opening the door.

Arctos:I thought you had to pick the fucking door.

Benny:We have volunteered Benny.

Benny:This one's open or this one needs keys?

Benny:I guess we have to see.

Benny:Does it say if it's locked?

Gamemaster:It is currently a closed door.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:It doesn't... No tooltip appears while you look at it.

Benny:In Fallout, it says if it's locked before you open it.

Arctos:We gotta get a HUD, guys.

Johnny:Yeah, there's...

Gamemaster:It's too high of a level for you to purchase right now.

Benny:How much is a Pip-Boy?

Arctos:It shows if you're seen or not too.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Benny:Fair enough.

Arctos:All right.

Benny:Alright, Benny will see if the door is locked.

Gamemaster:How's he doing, though?

Benny:With his child-sized, but definitely not child... Yeah.

Gamemaster:He's trying to turn the knob.

Gamemaster:Oh, absolutely.

Gamemaster:Yeah, it's locked.

Benny:Guys, it's locked.

Arctos:Do any of the keys work?

Benny:Benny will then take one of the keys out.

Gamemaster:You try the key that didn't work on the service door, and it does work here.

Johnny:I will aid the child.

Gamemaster:There is a click as the door behind you opens.

Gamemaster:Or, sorry, unlocks.

Arctos:Let's go in, boys.

Benny:Let's open it.

Arctos:We slink down.

Arctos:How wide are the stairs to go back to the original?

Gamemaster:Is Benny opening the door as well?

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:I guess Benny can open the door.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:Oh.

Benny:22.

Gamemaster:Benny opens the door.

Gamemaster:Roll a perception check for me, and I'll tell you how wide the stairs are.

Arctos:Can Arctos also, since he's next to Benny?

Gamemaster:Sure.

Arctos:Cool.

Gamemaster:Both of you can roll a stair wideness check.

Johnny:I don't think my aid helped anything.

Arctos:Oh.

Arctos:You know what, guys?

Gamemaster:A 17 is a failure.

Gamemaster:You do not aid the child.

Gamemaster:22.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:There is an obvious shift as you open up the door, complemented by the fact that there's this tingling feeling on Benny's fingers as he pushes the door in to open it, as you feel that they have just brushed past the threshold into a heart's Fane.

Arctos:Oh, it's hard.

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:You've been in a lot of fanes in your lives, both in this campaign and in your backstories and stuff.

Gamemaster:Usually fanes are... Not usually.

Gamemaster:Most fanes you see in the city tend to be extensions of the area in which they're built.

Gamemaster:The Sin and Tonic is a Fane of a pub.

Gamemaster:in a pub.

Gamemaster:It's just a bigger pub.

Gamemaster:When you had gone to the police station, the Magical Crimes Convox, that felt like a fame, but the interior looked like it looked like a police station.

Arctos:Precinct.

Gamemaster:It was just bigger.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Um...

Gamemaster:The heart that has projected the Fane that you were looking down into does not share the same sensibilities as the other Fanes that you guys have been around.

Gamemaster:This is an obvious total and architectural shift from the gas station that is built above this Fane.

Gamemaster:You can see this opens up into a spiral staircase headed downward about five feet.

Gamemaster:It's spinning counterclockwise downward as you head.

Gamemaster:Exterior wall of the spiral staircase appears to be lined with stained glass of reds and yellows and whites depicting this just fire passing all the way down the staircase, just one continuous inferno as it extends downward.

Gamemaster:There is a noticeable blast of hot air as you open the door.

Gamemaster:The floors and the inner wall appear to be made out of this kind of dull steel, almost like construction plating.

Arctos:Our guy would have loved this place.

Gamemaster:And there is a noticeable sound of rushing...

Gamemaster:something pneumatics hydraulics steam something of that nature moving through like underneath the floors and in the inner wall of the spiral staircase that almost gives the impression as if the the building itself is breathing

Arctos:Do hearts normally know the locations of everyone that are in it?

Arctos:Or the presence, at least?

Gamemaster:Usually no.

Gamemaster:Unless it's a heart that's built specifically for surveillance.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:Generally, they don't have full... Ginny would have to walk around and find you guys inside of the tavern.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:He can't walk, but you know what I mean.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Um...

Arctos:Alright, let's go.

Benny:Go first.

Arctos:Sorry, can two people, or is it one by one?

Gamemaster:This is actually narrow enough that only one person can go down the stairs at a time.

Arctos:All right, Benny, you go first.

Arctos:I'll cover you.

Benny:What?

Benny:Why are we putting the half, the just back child?

Gamemaster:The child.

Benny:All right, fine.

Arctos:Yeah, the difference is if I go down, it's harder for you to bring me up.

Benny:Benny will go first.

Benny:But Benny's also not built for defense.

Anzu:This feels like just throwing strategy out the window.

Benny:I vote Mind Bird.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Anzu:Wouldn't hurt me at all, actually.

Arctos:Benny, then Arctos.

Benny:It feels like throwing a bird down a flight of stairs to me.

Johnny:Thank you.

Arctos:Alright, we creep down.

Arctos:Benny first.

Benny:Yeah.

Arctos:Then Arctos.

Arctos:Sir Arctos.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:So you start navigating down the spiral staircase further into this Fane.

Gamemaster:It's warm, and the...

Gamemaster:The walls, which have railings on them if you touch them at all, do pulse slightly, like they're breathing in and out.

Gamemaster:It doesn't react to your presence at all, it just seems like it's a constant motion there.

Gamemaster:You take the spiral staircase down...

Gamemaster:like three rotations, the equivalent maybe of 20 feet down before you enter into the Fane proper.

Gamemaster:You walk into this large steel and glass hallway.

Gamemaster:The floor is steel, but they're almost skylights.

Gamemaster:I don't know what you call skylights when they're on the floor.

Gamemaster:glass panels embedded in the floor that don't appear to show anything beneath them because they're slightly clouded over.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:There's just this faint orange glow coming from underneath them.

Gamemaster:The architecture in here is very, very ornate.

Gamemaster:Had somebody needed to actually physically build this instead of magically manifesting it, it would have taken multiple artisans, like, decades to get all of this.

Gamemaster:It's these wrought iron carvings designed to look like flames across the sides of the hallway here, and more stained glass panels that appear to be lit from whatever's beyond them, despite the fact that you are underground.

Gamemaster:throwing off this kaleidoscopic reds and yellows and oranges into the hallway below.

Gamemaster:Can I get a perception check as you enter into this hallway into the rest of the thing?

Gamemaster:Both to see, like, entrances and exits and to, like, listen for people.

Arctos:Can Arctos see over Benny to also look?

Benny:28 crit

Gamemaster:Up to two people can look.

Gamemaster:Once you make it down into the hallway proper, you can fan out into two and two.

Arctos:Well, I'll take that, I guess.

Arctos:Real Christmas colors on Josh's screen.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Gamemaster:Thank you for this.

Gamemaster:With the 28 crit.

Gamemaster:You can't tell if the feign is small.

Gamemaster:or if it's just laid out very strangely.

Gamemaster:Because you've walked down the spiral staircase, and now that you've walked down the spiral staircase, you're in a hallway that appears to only lead to one spot.

Gamemaster:It's...

Gamemaster:It's not very well designed from an architectural perspective.

Gamemaster:It's not something that one would like want to use as a space because it feels so wasteful with the amount of area that you're having to pass through to get to anything of importance.

Arctos:Uh-huh.

Gamemaster:It feels very much instead like a show.

Gamemaster:There's a lot of pomp and circumstance of all of these fancy stained glass and these iron murals and all of that kind of stuff leading forward to an archway at the end of this hallway, about 30 feet down, that then opens up into this massive, almost entirely empty space.

Gamemaster:With a crit, you can see into the space and look around, despite the fact that they're a little further away.

Gamemaster:The hallway opens out into this large bridge that appears to pass over a gap to who knows where.

Gamemaster:Further at the other end of that bridge, there is a throne.

Gamemaster:There is a throne on a raised altar of some kind.

Arctos:Asshole.

Gamemaster:There are a few people that you would recognize as...

Gamemaster:members of the Roundhat Gang.

Gamemaster:But there is a figure that you don't... You know what?

Gamemaster:On a crit, I think you probably would recognize.

Gamemaster:You'd have to squint a little bit.

Gamemaster:The figure sitting on the throne doesn't immediately strike you as anybody.

Gamemaster:Um...

Gamemaster:because they are generally humanoid in nature, a little on the taller side.

Arctos:Oh no.

Gamemaster:But the exterior of this person is just burnt black, like ash or solidified organic matter of some kind.

Gamemaster:And it's obviously hollow, because there are

Gamemaster:breaks in that black skin, and on the interior you can see that there's just this flame burning out of the chest and up where a skull used to be.

Gamemaster:But the thing that takes it off for you is there are still two noticeable black stained antlers on the head of this thing, and you realize that this is a...

Gamemaster:on-fire husk of what used to be Tywelwyn.

Gamemaster:And I'm just going to... You're actually a little further back here, but I don't have the thing off the hallway itself, so you just see the bridge leading up.

Johnny:Oh, God.

Arctos:I thought it was going to be Grayson, and this is somehow better, but not much.

Arctos:Are those glass things, or are those different walkways?

Johnny:Oh.

Johnny:Oh, this is scary.

Gamemaster:That's glass.

Gamemaster:You can walk on that.

Arctos:OK.

Gamemaster:That's glass.

Gamemaster:You can just walk on it.

Gamemaster:It's a kind of like artistic feature of the heart manifesting the space.

Arctos:Is there a rain mint on him?

Gamemaster:At this point, he probably would have a raiment, but it's not the same color as the raiment.

Gamemaster:When you originally met him, he had a raiment of the host.

Gamemaster:Or when you met his simulacrum, his simulacrum had a raiment of the host.

Gamemaster:This thing has a jet black raiment instead.

Arctos:Gotcha.

Johnny:Everyone's got eat fire, right?

Arctos:So are we going to... Does the rain mint look like a size that we could take in a fight?

Gamemaster:Roll an occultism check.

Arctos:Can I roll a religion check?

Gamemaster:Yeah, I'll allow a religion check, that's fine.

Arctos:Cool.

Johnny:We all got that spell?

Anzu:Oh yeah, I'll do a cult, sure.

Arctos:Hey Tanner, do you want to roll a cult?

Arctos:I got a 19.

Anzu:Wait, let me make sure I do this right.

Anzu:Yeah, 13.

Anzu:Are we going to roll it in the thing?

Anzu:Oh, I shouldn't have done that.

Anzu:Well, I got a 16.

Arctos:This isn't... I can't apply my student of the canon to church.

Arctos:Is this teachings of the... Okay.

Gamemaster:No.

Gamemaster:No, this is not.

Gamemaster:I think with the roles that you guys got, he's definitely on the stronger side of what you think would be within your capabilities.

Arctos:Oh, so we can do it.

Gamemaster:It'll be a hard fight, but you think you could take him down at this point.

Arctos:Let's do it.

Arctos:Fucking do it.

Gamemaster:It's not like a massive overbearing raiment.

Gamemaster:It's just, if anything, a little stark for the fact that it's not obviously one of the outer gods that you're familiar with.

Arctos:Fucking send it.

Johnny:Do we want to stealth or do we want to go in guns blazing?

Arctos:So we're just going to continue stealthing until they see us, and then we sprint?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:I think he's 150 feet away.

Arctos:I'd like to see how close we can get without needing to enter combat.

Johnny:Okay.

Benny:Agreed.

Johnny:I'm down.

Johnny:Let's do it.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:We're just going to keep your stealth rolls because they were good.

Gamemaster:I think that'd be fun.

Gamemaster:And I'm just going to instead roll a perception check for him.

Gamemaster:for Mr. Twillin.

Arctos:At 19.

Johnny:Oh, God, he got a question mark.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you guys can get to, I'm going to say here, like fully off the bridge before anybody notices you.

Anzu:All right.

Johnny:Oh, no.

Arctos:Hell yeah.

Gamemaster:because you rolled well.

Gamemaster:So somehow, despite the fact that you are just walking out in the open across this bridge, it's the ponchos, combined with the fact that Twelman, despite the fact that he is a burned-out husk, does appear to be mobile and is actively talking to this tiger-like humanoid at his side about something that they're too far out of earshot for you to engage with.

Arctos:The ponchos.

Johnny:It's the barge.

Arctos:Hmm.

Gamemaster:Um...

Gamemaster:So you let me know when you guys feel like you're in a place that you like, and then I think we're going to have to roll initiative.

Arctos:Benny, are we just going to rush the rat in front of us?

Arctos:Or are you going to run for the big guy?

Benny:um that is a good question

Arctos:Wait, before we get down here, I'm just going to call out to everyone.

Johnny:I kind of think we should pick him up.

Arctos:My healing spells range is 30 feet.

Arctos:And battle medicine is touch.

Arctos:So I'm just calling it out for people who don't know how my spell works.

Johnny:Okay.

Johnny:My healing is 30 feet too.

Johnny:That's good to know.

Johnny:Um, where are you guys going first?

Gamemaster:You're a close-knit group.

Johnny:I will wait.

Johnny:Where are you two going first?

Johnny:Cause I'll direct all my stuff at whoever you're going for.

Arctos:I guess... I think the rat's going to be the weakest, but it also might be the most bursty.

Arctos:I think we take him out first.

Johnny:Okay, take out the rat first.

Arctos:And then... Do we take out the little guys first, then go for Tywelwyn, or go for Tywelwyn first?

Benny:I think we have to get down to at most two, like Tywelwyn plus one, just to avoid ludicrous action economy and flank.

Johnny:I think we take out the little guys first.

Johnny:Pick them off on the way.

Arctos:Okay.

Arctos:Alright, sounds good.

Johnny:What happened last time?

Arctos:Luckily there aren't reinforcements yet.

Johnny:That was a really good call, Jorge.

Benny:Yeah.

Arctos:Thank you, thank you.

Arctos:Bears wise.

Arctos:Alright, let's go.

Arctos:I'm ready.

Arctos:We're going for rat first.

Gamemaster:Okay, then I would love it if you guys could roll initiative.

Johnny:We'll go for that.

Gamemaster:It can either be perception or stealth, or if you have some secret third thing that your feats let you do, you could do that too.

Arctos:I wish I could do religion.

Johnny:I decided not to take the thing to let me do performance.

Anzu:Everybody's rolling privately.

Benny:Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

Johnny:Oh, God.

Johnny:Why do they all roll so well?

Gamemaster:I mean, I...

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:They all rolled so well.

Johnny:All right, Mindbird.

Gamemaster:So we will begin the encounter.

Gamemaster:So all of you are sneaking up until you get to the point that somebody notices you.

Gamemaster:The rat sees you miraculously.

Gamemaster:He like, it was staring off into the distance and then suddenly snaps back.

Arctos:Ha ha ha.

Gamemaster:And there are four, sorry, five people.

Gamemaster:I don't know if we count Othello as a person.

Gamemaster:I'm counting Othello as a person.

Benny:Oh, sorry.

Gamemaster:There are five people just on the front landing of this throne room.

Gamemaster:I have sent an assassin to poison Mike, but other than that,

Benny:I thought that was muted.

Gamemaster:The rat will yell out that they're intruders.

Benny:I'm trying to get this stuff out of my lungs.

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Tywelwyn looks over at all of you, and combat will begin.

Gamemaster:We are going to start with Anzu.

Anzu:Right.

Anzu:Not exactly ideal for me to go first, but I'll do it anyway.

Gamemaster:You can always delay your initiative.

Gamemaster:You can choose to drop your initiative at any point.

Benny:Can you double it and give it to the next person?

Anzu:I think that, yeah, can I delay to right after Arctos?

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Anzu:Is that all right with you, Arctos?

Arctos:Yeah, go for it.

Gamemaster:Then it's the boar's turn.

Gamemaster:Some of you will recognize this particular boar.

Johnny:Oh, this guy.

Arctos:Fuck that Org.

Gamemaster:He'll look over and say, didn't I fucking kill you?

Johnny:Oh, yeah.

Gamemaster:Which strikes me as very similar to what Hlarf said right before he died.

Gamemaster:And the boar is going to spend...

Gamemaster:An action to move.

Gamemaster:That's 10 feet.

Gamemaster:That's his 25 feet.

Johnny:Make it fun.

Johnny:Their action's coming to us.

Gamemaster:How far away is he?

Gamemaster:Okay, so you are now... He spends one action to get there, and then he'll spend another two actions to do a boar charge.

Johnny:Kill the bear.

Gamemaster:We'll let him stride twice and then make a melee attack.

Gamemaster:So he gets the two strides right towards Arctos.

Arctos:What an ass.

Gamemaster:And is going to attempt to attack Arctos.

Anzu:Maybe he'll have to die first.

Benny:He could have.

Benny:Well, I mean, to be fair...

Johnny:Don't forget the reaction thing that lets him come back at one.

Gamemaster:That is a 27 to him.

Arctos:That was the guy.

Arctos:That hits.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You are going to take 10 points of piercing damage as he gores you.

Johnny:um um

Arctos:All right.

Gamemaster:That's the end of his turn.

Gamemaster:Arctos, it's your turn.

Arctos:look at him, and I look at my compatriots, and I say, is this the boar that murdered that child?

Arctos:We shall curse down all of these heretics.

Arctos:And then I cast Bless.

Arctos:And as I... Oh, no, sorry, I cast Benediction.

Arctos:I think that's the one I will cast.

Arctos:So... Benediction... Yes.

Arctos:That's a... Cast spell.

Arctos:Um... Flourished.

Johnny:Oh.

Arctos:So...

Arctos:Around Arctos, you see little bits of spark, almost like a little bit of static electricity, and then it flickers, and then all of a sudden it turns into aurora, and swirling around him, benediction, and that'll be increasing everyone's AC.

Gamemaster:I don't understand how you're level 4 and you already have two auras.

Arctos:And then, that was flourished, I will then make a strike against this man.

Gamemaster:That's illegal.

Arctos:Oh, it's a crit.

Gamemaster:You can't have this many effects just by default.

Johnny:Oh.

Gamemaster:Oh, that's private.

Gamemaster:I have no idea what you rolled.

Arctos:I don't know how to show it.

Gamemaster:Can you right-click on it and then there should be a reveal?

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:I don't know why it all turned everything.

Gamemaster:Yeah, nice.

Gamemaster:If you roll a self-roll, unfortunately, I can't look at them.

Arctos:Those are macros.

Arctos:Those are macros I had.

Arctos:I don't know why suddenly the things change.

Arctos:It's our role.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Still, that's also a self-roll.

Gamemaster:I have no idea what you're doing.

Arctos:Gosh, dang it.

Arctos:OK.

Arctos:Reveal.

Arctos:Well, I didn't like that one, so.

Johnny:So I want to do one more thing.

Arctos:OK.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Arctos:And then I will.

Gamemaster:He takes the 21 damage and the fire damage.

Arctos:Oh, my shield macro no longer exists.

Arctos:So I will raise my shield, but give me a second.

Johnny:The relationship between two people.

Johnny:Two people.

Johnny:I want to be able to talk to you about that.

Arctos:That'll be my turn so you can move on and I'll figure out how to get that back.

Arctos:That's not.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Okay, so then it's Anzu's turn.

Anzu:Okay.

Anzu:The first thing I'll do is I'll kind of first just...

Arctos:Oops.

Johnny:um you

Anzu:sort of chatter and click my beak a couple times.

Anzu:And then I'll start saying mean things to this boar.

Anzu:Be like, you don't have the guts to kill us a second time.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Arctos:Wow, you're showing him.

Johnny:Yeah.

Anzu:And I will cast Biting Words.

Anzu:And I will make an attack roll against him.

Gamemaster:That hits.

Anzu:I've hit.

Anzu:I'll roll damage.

Anzu:Wow, that's pretty tough.

Johnny:Thank you.

Anzu:But I'm building for the future.

Anzu:That's three points of sonic damage to him.

Anzu:Am I close enough to Tywelwyn to make a... What is it called?

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Anzu:Recall Knowledge?

Anzu:Or whatever.

Gamemaster:I would assume the answer is yes.

Gamemaster:Let me double check.

Gamemaster:I will also note that the boar is bloodied with your hint.

Johnny:um

Gamemaster:Yeah, you're close enough.

Gamemaster:You can see him.

Anzu:Alright, I'll make... I'll do that.

Anzu:I'll do a recall knowledge.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:If it can be a cult, I'll do it a cult.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:It can be a cult.

Gamemaster:A cult or arcana.

Anzu:Bad.

Gamemaster:Yeah, unfortunately with a 15, you just don't learn any particularly useful information.

Gamemaster:He's on fire.

Anzu:Yeah.

Johnny:Do you have another phone bonus somewhere?

Arctos:Josh, do you know why raising a shield doesn't increase my AC?

Anzu:Um...

Gamemaster:I can check.

Benny:Are you already benefiting from bonuses that would overlap?

Gamemaster:No, it just doesn't look like your shield is raised right now.

Arctos:Oh, it says I have the raise shield effect.

Arctos:Maybe I don't have the shield equipped or something.

Gamemaster:I know.

Gamemaster:But I'm looking at the modifier and it doesn't...

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Shield.

Gamemaster:I don't know.

Arctos:I should have 20... I should have two more.

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Oh, is it broken?

Gamemaster:Oh, it's broken, that's why.

Arctos:Oh.

Arctos:It shouldn't be.

Gamemaster:Because you... I... We...

Arctos:I think I gave myself a broken shield.

Gamemaster:No, you might have given yourself a broken shield, because it was your fortress shield that got... Okay, so... One second.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Arctos:If you could, uh... Thank you, thank you.

Gamemaster:Let me repair that for you.

Gamemaster:What is its HP supposed to actually be?

Arctos:64, I believe.

Gamemaster:Can I just... I'm just going to give you...

Arctos:Yeah, it says shield break max HP 64.

Arctos:Thank you.

Gamemaster:I'm just going to roll something with an absurdly high modifier to guarantee that you do well.

Johnny:Wow.

Gamemaster:Because I don't know what the correct way to fix it is.

Gamemaster:There we go.

Gamemaster:Now it's fully healed.

Arctos:Cool, thank you.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:There we go.

Arctos:Now I have my 25 AC.

Arctos:Thank you.

Johnny:Crazy.

Anzu:I casted shield with my final action.

Benny:you you

Gamemaster:Okay, sorry for the interruption there.

Gamemaster:All right.

Gamemaster:Next up is the tiger-like roundhat, who I think is probably going to drop their initiative.

Johnny:I think I had like weakest five if I saw right.

Gamemaster:I don't think they want to run towards you because they figure that you're going to come here.

Gamemaster:So they're just going to wait.

Anzu:Mm hmm.

Arctos:Did my weapon do any extra damage for being silvered?

Gamemaster:It did.

Arctos:Okay, cool.

Gamemaster:Yes, it was weak to the silver addition damage, which instead brings us to Tywelwyn.

Johnny:You did 16.

Arctos:Cool, cool, cool.

Gamemaster:It's Tywelwyn's turn.

Gamemaster:Oh wait, I apologize.

Gamemaster:I forgot to do something.

Johnny:Oh, no.

Gamemaster:Where's his name?

Gamemaster:Where'd his name go?

Gamemaster:Sir.

Johnny:Unnamed health bar.

Gamemaster:What if I do that?

Anzu:It's the rat's health bar.

Gamemaster:I don't know why it's not giving him a name, so it's just going to look like this, I guess.

Anzu:Ooh.

Johnny:Oh, God, it's scary.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Gamemaster:I don't know what happened.

Gamemaster:I broke it on my screen.

Arctos:It's like the final boss in Hades 2.

Gamemaster:Never mind.

Gamemaster:This isn't working.

Gamemaster:I didn't realize that.

Gamemaster:I just assumed it would continue to work, but Foundry updated, so maybe it's broken now.

Gamemaster:Never mind.

Gamemaster:You don't get to see health bar.

Johnny:I do.

Gamemaster:Tywelwyn... is short?

Gamemaster:What's the range on this?

Gamemaster:Oh, the range is great on this.

Gamemaster:I'm going to cast this.

Gamemaster:Cloan is going to extend his hand and a fireball is going to come out of it.

Anzu:Alright, well that's tough.

Johnny:I'm going to eat fire.

Arctos:That's not...

Anzu:That's really tough.

Johnny:Maybe I'll crit on this.

Benny:Can you hear for everyone?

Gamemaster:Nice.

Anzu:I'm gonna eat fire too.

Gamemaster:Stop privately rolling the dice.

Gamemaster:I can't see it, Jorge.

Arctos:I don't know why it keeps doing that.

Arctos:Self-roll.

Johnny:Maybe I'll crit.

Johnny:I won't have to e-fire.

Gamemaster:Jorge, can you do me a favor?

Johnny:No, I don't think I'll crit.

Gamemaster:Where the messages are in the bottom right of your screen, like where you can type in a message, which of the four boxes on the left above that is selected?

Arctos:Thank you.

Arctos:Now I'm public.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:I'm going to reroll that with a mythic point.

Gamemaster:Yeah, so... Sure.

Anzu:Dang, I rolled pretty good, and I still failed.

Benny:Oh, here we are.

Johnny:uh we're on that with another point um

Anzu:Well, at least I get to subtract 5 from it.

Benny:Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and reroll that.

Arctos:You didn't add your mythic proficiency.

Arctos:Oh, never mind.

Arctos:That's Benny.

Benny:Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and reroll that.

Benny:Oh, it says I have no mythic points.

Arctos:Alright, I guess I'll re-roll it.

Arctos:Everyone's just scared of this fireball.

Gamemaster:Did it revert back to self-roll?

Johnny:This is not.

Arctos:No, it didn't revert.

Arctos:It's still everyone.

Anzu:Oh, you know what?

Arctos:At the bottom.

Arctos:That's crazy.

Anzu:Oh, that's so interesting.

Arctos:I'm going to refresh now that I changed that.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:Josh, I don't know how to roll for Othello.

Gamemaster:If you click on Othello...

Anzu:Oh, I can open it up.

Anzu:Can I roll from here?

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah, the reflex is in the top right.

Gamemaster:Or if you just click on him and then you click the reflex save button, that should work as well.

Anzu:Oh, well, I did it this way.

Anzu:Sorry.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:I got an 18, which is probably pretty bad.

Gamemaster:That's fine.

Anzu:Except...

Gamemaster:The N18 is a failure.

Johnny:Am I going crazy?

Johnny:Where's the mythic button?

Arctos:You've got to right-click it, and then it should say reroll mythic proficiency.

Arctos:That only shows up if you have mythic points.

Johnny:Gotcha.

Johnny:Interesting.

Arctos:So to have mythic points, you've got to double-click on your character, and then you can add the mythic points at the top.

Arctos:Oh, I had an extra one.

Arctos:Does that fail?

Johnny:Ah, okay.

Johnny:I see.

Johnny:Thank you.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:But this is good to know.

Gamemaster:Have we all rolled and know what we received?

Arctos:Yes.

Johnny:Yes.

Benny:Mm hmm.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Johnny succeeded.

Gamemaster:Othello failed.

Gamemaster:Benny succeeded.

Gamemaster:Anzu failed.

Gamemaster:Correct?

Anzu:Strike that, reverse it.

Arctos:Arctos crit.

Arctos:Crit succeeded.

Gamemaster:Yes, Crit succeeded.

Gamemaster:Okay, I'm going to roll damage.

Gamemaster:If you critically succeeded, you take no damage.

Gamemaster:If you regularly succeeded, you take full.

Gamemaster:If you failed, you take half.

Gamemaster:It's 27 points of fire damage.

Gamemaster:Strike that, reverse it.

Gamemaster:If you're eating fire, you get to just not take some of it.

Benny:Wait, so you fail, you take full, you succeed, you take half?

Johnny:That's wrong.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Gamemaster:Basic save.

Benny:Okay.

Benny:I think you said it in inverse, and I was like, wait a minute, is this... Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Oh, did I?

Gamemaster:I apologize.

Gamemaster:Normal basic save.

Johnny:It should be.

Johnny:There we go.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:And then Twillowin is going to cast Shield.

Arctos:A little bitch ass.

Benny:Smart.

Johnny:That guy sucks.

Benny:Smart.

Arctos:So he killed his boar and then we charge?

Gamemaster:It's the rat's turn.

Gamemaster:I think the rat... The rat doesn't really have the movement to get over there, but I think he's just going to...

Johnny:So I don't think we have to do that.

Benny:I think it does.

Gamemaster:He's just going to take potshots with his pistol instead.

Gamemaster:He's on like a lookout area.

Gamemaster:Excuse me.

Gamemaster:I think he's probably going to... Benny's right in front of him.

Johnny:So I don't think we have to do that.

Gamemaster:He's going to go for Benny.

Johnny:So I don't think we have to do that.

Gamemaster:He's going to make a shot with his pistol.

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:that hits.

Gamemaster:You're going to take five points of piercing damage.

Benny:Curses.

Gamemaster:He's going to spend an action to reload, and then he's going to take a second shot with his pistol.

Gamemaster:That misses because of benediction.

Arctos:As it comes, it just gets slowed down just enough by some Aurora that it bounces off Benny's breastplate.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:And that brings us to Johnny.

Johnny:I will first flourish cast musical accompaniment.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Save myself a little extra.

Johnny:Then I will just yell and do a good old lingering composition slash courageous anthem.

Johnny:I got a new performance.

Johnny:Oh, and I'm banging my new drum as I

Johnny:I'm doing this.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:I think that's all my stuff.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Johnny:That's awesome.

Johnny:Is that a crit?

Johnny:I believe that's a crit.

Gamemaster:Uh, 33 is a crit.

Benny:you

Johnny:Amazing.

Gamemaster:I just like how early we are in the campaign for you guys to be stacking this many status effects.

Arctos:We learned this time.

Johnny:And then, last off, I will just demoralize this boar-like round hat.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Johnny:But I will use performance for it.

Johnny:Because I can do that.

Johnny:Maybe.

Johnny:If I can find any of my stuff.

Arctos:Bye.

Johnny:This is against his will, DC.

Johnny:And that is my turn.

Gamemaster:A 26 just succeeds against a Swill DC.

Gamemaster:But it does succeed.

Gamemaster:So he's frightened one.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Benny!

Benny:Let's see.

Benny:Yeah, I think Benny is going to... If I'm going to spend movement, I might as well spend a bunch of movement.

Johnny:also you

Benny:So this is... Yes.

Arctos:Friendly reminder, if you have a Godspeed, you can always click it.

Arctos:It is a mythic, though.

Benny:Not right now.

Benny:Although I probably should do it right now if I'm going to do it.

Benny:But anyways, now this guy is flanked.

Benny:That was one move, one action.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:And we shall double slice.

Benny:First with the newly silvered pick.

Arctos:Juicy Juicy Juicy

Gamemaster:That crits.

Johnny:Nice.

Benny:the fuck is all this damage?

Gamemaster:Holy shit.

Benny:Huh.

Benny:I did already say it was double slice.

Benny:It's fair.

Gamemaster:You did already say it was double slice.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:He does just fully die from that.

Gamemaster:He's going to use a reaction to use ferocity to not be dead.

Gamemaster:He has one hit point.

Johnny:I think it's double-sided.

Benny:Very smart move.

Arctos:Good thing you double-slip.

Gamemaster:He doesn't move.

Benny:OK.

Gamemaster:Stop!

Benny:In that case, he'll get hit with the poly tool?

Gamemaster:leaving.

Gamemaster:There we go.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:That also hits.

Gamemaster:He has one hit point.

Arctos:He dead.

Gamemaster:Can you deal one hit point of damage?

Benny:I think so.

Gamemaster:He has no more reactions, so this time he's dead for good.

Gamemaster:You fully cut him.

Johnny:Oh.

Gamemaster:Oh, wait, sorry.

Gamemaster:You used a pick.

Gamemaster:So you give him a full ice pick lobotomy to the head, and he's so angry that he stays alive.

Gamemaster:And then you just kind of whack him on the side of the head with your polytool and he heals over.

Benny:Fantastic.

Benny:That is very certain.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:That brings us to the Tiger-like round hat again.

Gamemaster:Who had... I think... I think they're just going to... They're going to move over towards the staircase that you guys look like you're going to come up.

Gamemaster:And they're going to ready an action to attack anybody who enters their range.

Arctos:We take it the other staircase.

Johnny:Wait, I can rainbows end us over there if you guys want.

Gamemaster:That's fine.

Arctos:That would be very cool.

Gamemaster:Start to assist her.

Benny:Wait, sorry, what happened that turn?

Benny:I don't know if we need it, but...

Gamemaster:The tiger-like roundhat walked up to the side of the staircase that it looked like you guys were going to go up and readied an action to attack you if you entered that range.

Johnny:If you guys delay till after me, I can rainbows end us all over there.

Johnny:I have a mythic point left for it.

Arctos:Sorry, so where could you get us in front of Tywelwyn?

Johnny:I can get us right on top of Tywelwyn I can get us.

Johnny:It's a, it's a pretty good range.

Arctos:And for us to use it, would I have to defer my turn to use it?

Johnny:Yeah.

Arctos:And then I can go after that?

Johnny:I'd have to go first.

Benny:Thank you.

Johnny:Let's see here.

Johnny:Uh-huh.

Johnny:Well, when is 70 feet away?

Johnny:If I walk a little bit.

Johnny:Yeah, I can get us to him.

Arctos:And then it's an action for us to... Yeah, I'll defer.

Johnny:Yeah, it's an actual.

Arctos:That sounds great, don't you think?

Arctos:Or no?

Johnny:I just don't know how many actions it would take you guys to get over there.

Johnny:I don't want you guys wasting actions.

Arctos:I think that's a good idea.

Arctos:Alright, I'll wait.

Benny:Probably a whole turn for Benny.

Arctos:Yeah, I'll hold.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you're waiting until after Johnny?

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay, we can do that.

Gamemaster:That brings us to Anzu.

Anzu:Yeah, I'm not going to do that.

Arctos:You don't even have to come in the rainbow.

Anzu:How far is this thing?

Anzu:55.

Anzu:This is very fascinating right now.

Anzu:Well.

Anzu:I'm going to unleash my psyche.

Gamemaster:Well, okay.

Arctos:Mind bird.

Benny:Get ready for hijinks of the most juvenile order.

Johnny:Oh, God.

Benny:I think it's just you.

Arctos:Uh-oh.

Arctos:He does not like hijinks.

Gamemaster:Did all of you lose connection to you or was that just me?

Arctos:Just you.

Anzu:Just you, Josh.

Gamemaster:Oh, good.

Arctos:Gotta love Queen's Wi-Fi, am I right?

Anzu:Did you happen to catch me unleashing my psyche?

Gamemaster:I heard that you were unleashing your psyche.

Gamemaster:I don't know if anything happened after that.

Anzu:Nothing else has occurred.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Oh, am I frozen on your screen?

Benny:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah, we can hear you.

Gamemaster:In the camera?

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Weird.

Anzu:Josh, if I move and Othello's on my shoulder, he could come with me, right?

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Anzu:I can't go there.

Anzu:Oh, no.

Anzu:Wait, how do I undo my movement?

Gamemaster:Control Z.

Anzu:Is it possible?

Anzu:Oh, wow.

Anzu:I didn't think it would just work like that.

Anzu:Oh, wait.

Anzu:Do I not even have to do that?

Anzu:I'm so sorry.

Anzu:I have 60 feet of range with this.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:um you

Anzu:So I will move to here.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:And I will cast at the rat-like round hat an amped telekinetic projectile.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:All right.

Anzu:Oh no.

Gamemaster:I apologize, that does miss.

Arctos:Hmm.

Anzu:That's really sad.

Gamemaster:Yep.

Anzu:Okay.

Anzu:So that's two actions.

Anzu:And then.

Anzu:With my third action.

Anzu:I say.

Anzu:Othello.

Anzu:Lend me some strength.

Anzu:And.

Anzu:Othello will use.

Anzu:Restorative familiar.

Anzu:And heal me.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Eel the bird.

Anzu:1d8 times 2.

Anzu:Otherwise known as 2d8.

Johnny:Ooh.

Arctos:Just in time for the next Fireball.

Anzu:Okay, that's how they play it.

Anzu:I wasn't sure.

Anzu:Oh, it applied to him, not me.

Anzu:That's not how that's supposed to go.

Johnny:Ooh.

Gamemaster:No, not that bird.

Anzu:Those are my three actions.

Anzu:Very disappointing.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:It's Tywelwyn's turn.

Gamemaster:Tywelwyn on his turn is not going to cast Fireball.

Gamemaster:I think instead he's going to cast Flaming Sphere, which is a completely different spell that has to do with fire and spheres.

Arctos:I noticed it has a 30-foot range.

Johnny:put it next to yourself oh

Gamemaster:He's going to... How do I place the sphere?

Benny:Bye.

Gamemaster:It does have a 30-foot range because he's putting the sphere next to him.

Arctos:Oh.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Arctos:I should have taken a cold spell or something.

Arctos:If I have lows, I don't even know if I do.

Gamemaster:I don't have a good token to be a fire sphere.

Gamemaster:Uh, what is the... Maybe... What is it?

Johnny:Oh no.

Anzu:Is there a little fire emote kind of thing?

Arctos:Maybe you should teleport us next to the tiger instead.

Anzu:How big is it?

Gamemaster:It's five feet.

Gamemaster:It's, like... I don't know what's happening!

Anzu:Oh, in a square within range.

Anzu:I see.

Arctos:Uh-oh.

Anzu:Yikes.

Anzu:And he returns.

Johnny:What?

Gamemaster:This fire wisp is the fire sphere.

Gamemaster:But I don't want it to be giving people resonance.

Gamemaster:Stop doing that.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Oh.

Anzu:Excuse me.

Gamemaster:The fire sphere is right here.

Gamemaster:And then he's going to cast shield.

Arctos:Oh, bitch.

Gamemaster:He doesn't want to be hurt.

Gamemaster:And I'm just going to leave my video off because I don't know if that was the cause of it or not.

Arctos:Sounds good.

Johnny:We see everything.

Gamemaster:It's the round hat's turn.

Gamemaster:The rat-like round hat's turn.

Anzu:Now we can't see when he fudges rolls.

Arctos:We can see it in your eyes.

Gamemaster:Could you see that before?

Anzu:Well, that's why you were keeping yourself honest by having the camera on.

Anzu:Now we don't know.

Gamemaster:Obviously, that's true.

Gamemaster:I'm going to roll a d100.

Gamemaster:If it's even, this roundhead is going to shoot Anzu.

Gamemaster:If it's odd, he's going to shoot Benny.

Anzu:That's so tough.

Gamemaster:He's going to shoot Anzu.

Gamemaster:He does have to spend an action to reload his pistol first, but then he shoots.

Gamemaster:That hits.

Anzu:sure sure

Johnny:Mind bird!

Benny:Sure.

Gamemaster:You're going to take six points of piercing damage, and then he'll spend his third action to reload again.

Gamemaster:It's Johnny's turn.

Johnny:Yes.

Johnny:First action.

Johnny:I will move up right here between these two gentlemen.

Johnny:Second action.

Johnny:I will...

Johnny:I'll give a distracting performance.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:This is one action, and I will do it on a... I'll do it on young Benjamin against this... Actually, what's the range on distracting performance real fast before I do that?

Anzu:I'll be right back.

Gamemaster:I think they just have to be able to see you.

Johnny:My apologies.

Benny:I have no idea.

Johnny:Create a diversion.

Johnny:I'm sorry.

Johnny:I've never had to do this at such a long range.

Johnny:Um, can create a version that draws... There's no range on this.

Arctos:Right.

Johnny:All right, well, I will... I will attempt to create the version using performance against all their perception DCs, I guess.

Gamemaster:It has the auditory trait or the manipulate trait.

Gamemaster:So they either have to be able to see or hear you.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Yes, go for it.

Johnny:Does that succeed against anybody?

Arctos:Good girl.

Gamemaster:A33 means that Benny is hidden from both of the wear Roundhats, but not Dwellwith.

Johnny:Excellent.

Johnny:Now that that has happened, for one action, I'll spend a mythic point.

Johnny:Was that a crit against anyone, by the way?

Gamemaster:Uh, no.

Johnny:Okay, bummer.

Johnny:I will spend a mythic point.

Johnny:And if I crit on him, I get a mythic point back.

Johnny:I'll spend a mythic point and cast Rainbow's End.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:And I will put the 10-foot burst... Can I get both these guys?

Johnny:Nah.

Johnny:I'll put the 10-foot burst right on top of this tiger-like round hat.

Johnny:So she has to make a basic fortitude save.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:succeeds.

Johnny:Well, that's a bummer.

Johnny:She takes half of this little... She takes one point of damage.

Gamemaster:Half.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:One spirit damage.

Gamemaster:And are they dazzled?

Gamemaster:Oh, it's if they fail to dazzle.

Gamemaster:Not dazzled.

Johnny:Yeah.

Johnny:But now that is happening, so anyone can take an interact action to get anywhere on that burst.

Johnny:And Benny is hidden from her.

Arctos:Cool.

Johnny:And that is my turn.

Arctos:Great.

Arctos:Now it's Arctos.

Gamemaster:Uh, correct.

Arctos:I would cast here.

Johnny:Oh.

Arctos:And I will do a three action flourish down to two.

Gamemaster:How many actions?

Arctos:30 foot.

Gamemaster:Of course.

Arctos:Just there.

Gamemaster:Uh... Oh, Anzu is within the 30 feet.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:That works.

Arctos:And Othello.

Gamemaster:How is Othello isn't 30 feet from you?

Arctos:Oh, well, how do I remove this?

Arctos:Which one's mine?

Arctos:I don't see it anymore.

Arctos:All right, I pressed that.

Arctos:Yeah, he's in it.

Anzu:You did warn Othello.

Gamemaster:The 30-foot emanation is from you.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Oh, I'm a dum-dum.

Arctos:OK, yeah.

Gamemaster:It's anybody within 30 feet of you, so it gets Anzu, but it doesn't get Othello.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah, yeah.

Arctos:OK.

Arctos:I warned Othello.

Anzu:I mean, he's on my... No, whatever.

Gamemaster:Hmm.

Arctos:Too bad he's not on the other shoulder.

Arctos:Could be on the other shoulder.

Anzu:Yeah.

Gamemaster:No, he is on your shoulder.

Gamemaster:That's fair.

Gamemaster:He's supposed to be in the same space as you, so that does mean that Othello should be within 30 feet.

Arctos:Hell yeah.

Johnny:Hello.

Anzu:Thank you, Josh.

Anzu:That's very kind.

Gamemaster:Of course.

Gamemaster:I will kill him next round.

Arctos:Oof.

Anzu:That's tough.

Arctos:That's so disappointing.

Benny:Boop, boop.

Arctos:But anyway.

Arctos:Alright.

Johnny:We are getting all this.

Arctos:And then I will teleport here.

Gamemaster:Everybody gets seven points.

Johnny:Who?

Arctos:Alright.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:The Tiger Lake Roundhead is going to attack you because they readied their action to do that.

Gamemaster:They are going to try and bite you.

Johnny:They are not dazzled.

Arctos:Are they dazzled?

Gamemaster:Nope.

Arctos:Alright.

Benny:Kind of hidden.

Gamemaster:I rolled poorly and I missed anyway.

Arctos:Missed!

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Let's end your turn, yeah?

Arctos:yes driving like the girl

Gamemaster:Benny!

Gamemaster:You're hidden.

Gamemaster:Kind of.

Benny:Benny will teleport here.

Benny:And Benny will double slice.

Johnny:Get a little bonked.

Gamemaster:Okay!

Anzu:Genius.

Benny:he was born to do it oh that's crazy get bonked oh get barely bonked oh uh

Gamemaster:Nobody thinks of the double slice.

Gamemaster:hits 10 points damage they are a little barked well more than 10 points of damage because they are also weak to silver

Anzu:That is crazy.

Johnny:Yeah, get bonked.

Benny:there was a mechanic that we didn't have with the hog that I'm not sure that should have played out with the hog, but I guess may play out with the tiger.

Benny:I don't think the tiger has this reaction.

Benny:Uh, Benny's pick goes in and he removes it.

Benny:And there is an, uh, orange and white glowing spot coming out.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Benny:And if this character attempts to heal or regain any hip points, um,

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Benny:And he'll take his second double slice attack.

Arctos:That's a grudge.

Johnny:No.

Gamemaster:Hits.

Benny:I know, but I wanted a crit.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Benny:I want crits.

Benny:Not a 10.

Gamemaster:Another 10 points of damage, which does get bumped up.

Gamemaster:No, never mind.

Gamemaster:This one's not silvered.

Gamemaster:It doesn't get bumped up at all.

Gamemaster:I dare you to consider that.

Gamemaster:That's the end of your turn, yeah?

Benny:Yep.

Gamemaster:Next up is going to be Tywelwyn's Cape.

Anzu:Jesus Christ.

Arctos:I forgot about that fucking cape.

Johnny:It's stupid cave.

Gamemaster:I still don't have an image for it, so just pretend that that man is a cape.

Benny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:which will float off of Tywelwyn further down this way.

Gamemaster:And now that the polar bear is flanked, it's going to attack him.

Gamemaster:He rolled a 22, which, because you are flanked, hits.

Arctos:Raise Reactive Shield.

Johnny:wow i didn't know you could get that at such a low level that's awesome

Gamemaster:Okay, because you reactive shield, it does not hits.

Arctos:Miss.

Gamemaster:And then I'll try one more attack, but he has map, so it's very unlikely that this will hit.

Arctos:Miss.

Gamemaster:Misses.

Gamemaster:And that's the end of the cape's turn.

Gamemaster:It's the tiger's turn.

Gamemaster:The tiger wants to attack Benny.

Gamemaster:but is going to attack the polar bear because he's flanked by the cape.

Gamemaster:It just feels like that's a thing that it has to do.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:It's going to try... Oh, actually, can I do these things?

Johnny:wait, is that a manipulate trait?

Gamemaster:Okay, actually, it's going to try and grab you, I think.

Gamemaster:No, it's just going to do an attack.

Gamemaster:It's just going to try and Jaws attack you.

Gamemaster:It's just going to try and bite you.

Gamemaster:I rolled a crit.

Gamemaster:It bites you.

Gamemaster:No, it's an attack.

Arctos:No.

Johnny:manipulate action?

Benny:No, I think it's just a strike.

Benny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:You're going to take 20 points of damage.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:And then, because its last action was a successful attack, it can attempt to grapple this turn without map.

Arctos:Good.

Gamemaster:So it's just going to attempt to grapple you.

Anzu:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Oh, but I rolled poorly.

Johnny:Hello.

Gamemaster:That fails against your Fort DC.

Gamemaster:Womp womp.

Gamemaster:Okay, it'll use its third action to just rend because it's already successfully striked you this turn, so it's just going to deal damage to you again.

Arctos:Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:But it's not crit.

Benny:What are the traits of the rend action?

Gamemaster:You're going to... None, actually?

Benny:Okay.

Gamemaster:I don't see any.

Gamemaster:I assume it's considered an attack.

Gamemaster:So you're just going to take an additional 12 points of damage.

Gamemaster:And that's the end of its turn.

Gamemaster:I'd say it's your turn.

Anzu:Okay.

Anzu:I will begin by striding to here.

Johnny:I want you to hear everything.

Anzu:Maybe I'll go one more, but I don't think... No, just to there.

Anzu:Um...

Anzu:Then, I will cast similarly amped a telekinetic rend.

Arctos:Ooh.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:I'll do two bursts, of course.

Anzu:One is on the rat-like round hat.

Gamemaster:Mm-hmm.

Anzu:And the other one will be on Tywelwyn and his cape.

Gamemaster:Okay, totally doable.

Johnny:Oh, that's awesome.

Anzu:Here, let me send this in.

Anzu:So all three of them can make this fort save.

Gamemaster:So all three need to make that fort save.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Oh, I rolled a natural 1 for Tywelwyn, so he critically fails.

Anzu:That's so sick.

Gamemaster:The other two succeed.

Arctos:Yes.

Anzu:Okay.

Anzu:Well, Tywelwyn...

Anzu:I think... And he's going to be stunned 1.

Gamemaster:Takes double damage.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Anzu:Because I'm amped.

Johnny:Wow.

Johnny:That's awesome.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:He's stunned.

Anzu:Let me roll damage.

Anzu:So he'll take 26.

Gamemaster:He takes... He takes 26 damage.

Anzu:Or whatever.

Gamemaster:The rat-like roundhat takes 13.

Gamemaster:The cape seems unaffected.

Johnny:It doesn't take mental damage.

Johnny:Oh, no.

Anzu:I dealt bludgeoning and slashing damage.

Gamemaster:No, this is... It's bludgeoning and slashing.

Johnny:ok ok ok

Gamemaster:It is not affected by either of those.

Anzu:That's tough.

Anzu:All right, well, at least I stunned 12, and that's pretty cool.

Gamemaster:Um...

Anzu:Do you have something else, Josh?

Gamemaster:No, I just wanted to note because you guys had fought the cape previously.

Gamemaster:You would know that the cape has a hardness.

Gamemaster:So that's why it didn't take the damage there.

Anzu:Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Anzu:Very well.

Anzu:And then with my third action, I will once again call on Othello and say, Othello, lend me more strength, and he'll use familiar focus to give me a focus point.

Arctos:Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:OK, is that the end of your turn?

Anzu:yes i think do i have to manually see yes

Johnny:one.

Gamemaster:It's Tywelwyn's turn.

Gamemaster:OK, so.

Gamemaster:First, Twillowood is going to sustain his flaming sphere and is going to move it so that it's just right on top of Arkados.

Arctos:I hope Johnny has that soothe ready.

Gamemaster:So you need to make a reflex save.

Johnny:Yeah, I gotcha.

Johnny:It's coming for you.

Gamemaster:I don't seem to have a button to make the reflex save available to you.

Gamemaster:So can you just... Great.

Arctos:Yes.

Arctos:Do I have creator's anthem?

Johnny:You should.

Johnny:Oh.

Gamemaster:You do.

Arctos:I will reroll.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:29 means you succeed, so you're going to take half of this damage.

Arctos:Cool.

Gamemaster:You take the 7 points of fire damage.

Johnny:Repent.

Arctos:All right.

Gamemaster:And because he's stunned, he only has one action remaining, so he's trying to figure out what to do with it.

Gamemaster:No, I think he's mad at Anzu.

Anzu:Uh-oh.

Gamemaster:Uh, so he's going to cast Daze Anzu.

Arctos:Mind bird.

Gamemaster:Anzu, attempt that will save.

Arctos:He sees through his third eye.

Arctos:It will not affect him.

Anzu:Uh-oh.

Johnny:All right.

Anzu:Why is Courageous Anthem turned off?

Anzu:Does it not apply to this?

Anzu:Oh, no, it doesn't apply to this.

Gamemaster:Uh, nope.

Anzu:Duh.

Anzu:It's just funny that it still shows up.

Anzu:Oh, my god.

Anzu:OK, let us do a little thing.

Anzu:And re-roll with a mythic point.

Gamemaster:Alright.

Gamemaster:That's much better.

Anzu:Because we don't want the scaries.

Gamemaster:That's a success.

Gamemaster:This is a basic will save, so you're going to take half of this damage.

Johnny:Oh, that guy.

Gamemaster:So you're going to take two points of mental damage.

Anzu:Ah!

Anzu:I wonder if I become resistant to that at some point.

Gamemaster:It is the rat-like roundhat's turn.

Gamemaster:I'm going to roll a d4, because it's random at this point who he can attack just in the middle with his pistol.

Anzu:Thank you.

Arctos:hoping not for a one

Gamemaster:One is Arctos, two is Benny, three is Johnny, four is Anzu.

Gamemaster:We're going for Benny!

Johnny:thank you

Benny:No.

Benny:Okay.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Gamemaster:That hits.

Gamemaster:You're going to take three points of piercing damage.

Gamemaster:He reloads.

Gamemaster:He fires again.

Gamemaster:No, that's a short sword.

Gamemaster:He fires again.

Gamemaster:18.

Johnny:Yeah, I will.

Gamemaster:That misses.

Gamemaster:Johnny, it's your turn.

Johnny:One action.

Arctos:I don't need to soothe anymore.

Johnny:Are you sure?

Arctos:Yeah, I'm fine.

Johnny:Alright.

Johnny:If you're sure, I will.

Johnny:One action.

Johnny:Can I run up there?

Johnny:No, I'm not taking the rain.

Arctos:You're not taking the rainbow?

Arctos:You fucking sold us on the rainbow.

Johnny:I'm not getting up in there.

Arctos:You sold us on the rainbow.

Johnny:No, you guys can have the Skittles.

Arctos:That's good.

Gamemaster:Okay Intimidate the rat Go for it

Johnny:Not tasting the rainbow.

Johnny:One action, do that.

Johnny:Second action, I will intimidate this rat.

Johnny:I will go boogity, boogity, boogity.

Johnny:Using performance.

Arctos:Very nice.

Gamemaster:Good roll.

Johnny:Amazing.

Gamemaster:That's against his will, DC?

Gamemaster:That's a crit.

Johnny:He is frightened, too.

Johnny:And... For my third action... I will use my silver to cast needle darts on this guy.

Arctos:Ooh.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Needle darts this man.

Johnny:Silver.

Johnny:Attack.

Benny:Thank you.

Anzu:Beautiful.

Johnny:Great.

Arctos:Because he's friends.

Johnny:And it's silver.

Gamemaster:Nice.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:And I am now reading the Spellneedle darts, and it occurs to me that now that you have the silver trunk, all of your attacks can be silver if you so choose.

Gamemaster:I didn't realize that you get the metal back once you throw it.

Johnny:I will roll damage with this silver.

Arctos:Hell yeah.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Benny:Oh boy.

Gamemaster:That's a crit, so he's going to take double that damage.

Johnny:I yell up to the people on the platform.

Gamemaster:Plus, he's weak, so he takes 31 total points of damage, and he also bleeds a little bit.

Johnny:Guys, I'm killing him.

Johnny:I'm doing it.

Johnny:Guys.

Johnny:That's my turn.

Johnny:That's all I got.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Arctos, it's your turn.

Arctos:Alright, I'm going to step out of that fire with a step action.

Gamemaster:That's a good idea.

Gamemaster:Short.

Johnny:Nice.

Arctos:Then I'm going to 2-action heal myself.

Arctos:Wow, that's a perfectly average roll.

Johnny:Oh.

Arctos:Well, 1 out of 0.

Gamemaster:Yeah, that works.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:And then I will also, to get my hero point back, I will treat wounds.

Arctos:No!

Gamemaster:That fails, unfortunately.

Arctos:Do I?

Arctos:Yeah, I'll roll a mythic point with it to get it back.

Arctos:And I get another mythic point because I succeed on it.

Gamemaster:Were you treating yourself or someone else?

Johnny:Wow.

Arctos:It's supposed to be me.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:I just didn't know who you were treating.

Arctos:Cool.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:And move, heal.

Arctos:Yep.

Arctos:That is it.

Arctos:That's my turn.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:The bear is ready again.

Gamemaster:Benny, it's your turn.

Benny:uh this is no longer flanked uh but we still want them dead as quickly as possible so i'm going to double slice as one does

Gamemaster:As one does.

Johnny:Oh, okay.

Arctos:What was that, 19 and 3?

Gamemaster:I'm sorry, that does miss.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:And then the second one.

Gamemaster:That's a better roll, that's a crit.

Arctos:Can he choose if he wants to to split that into two hits?

Gamemaster:No.

Arctos:All right.

Gamemaster:That's not how that works.

Arctos:There's a shot.

Arctos:I'm trying.

Gamemaster:You know that.

Gamemaster:Don't make me bring Hlarf back to life.

Gamemaster:I'll do it.

Johnny:no okay nice

Arctos:But if you average the two, then.

Gamemaster:Okay, you averaged the two and missed twice.

Arctos:No, no.

Arctos:It's a crit, so it automatically.

Benny:And they're clumsy and feeble until the end of my next turn.

Gamemaster:Absolutely, because the crushing root.

Benny:Because of the crushing.

Arctos:And they get the burning from my burning banner.

Gamemaster:Yes, and they're on fire.

Anzu:Incredible.

Benny:And... Let's see.

Arctos:Benny, do you have the benediction applied to you?

Gamemaster:He does.

Gamemaster:OK.

Arctos:Okay.

Johnny:Thank you.

Benny:Yeah.

Benny:And just in case, Benny will use his last action to activate the healing potion.

Benny:How do I even... I'll just add it.

Gamemaster:Oh, do you have the push in your inventory?

Gamemaster:If not, I can put it there so you can use it.

Arctos:That's a good thing.

Arctos:I'll just add my two as well.

Benny:Use...

Benny:All righty.

Benny:That is Benny's turn.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Excellent.

Gamemaster:It's the cape.

Gamemaster:Step.

Anzu:Okay.

Johnny:The Cape.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Gamemaster:The cape is going to strike you.

Johnny:Get out of here, Cape.

Gamemaster:But I think it's going to miss.

Gamemaster:It does miss.

Arctos:Yes.

Gamemaster:The cape is just here for fun, I think.

Gamemaster:He misses again.

Gamemaster:That's a critical miss.

Arctos:Yes.

Arctos:Fuck that guy.

Johnny:He's just having a good time.

Gamemaster:Yeah, he's just hanging out.

Gamemaster:Next up is going to be the tiger-like roundhat.

Gamemaster:Who is on fire and clumsy and enfeebled.

Arctos:Yes.

Gamemaster:And I think probably angry at Benny.

Johnny:D-Buff squad.

Gamemaster:So we're going for Benny.

Gamemaster:We're going to make a jaw attack.

Gamemaster:And I crit again.

Anzu:Dang.

Gamemaster:Sorry.

Johnny:Ooh.

Gamemaster:You're going to take 30 points of piercing damage.

Anzu:All the crap.

Gamemaster:And then I'm going to attempt to grapple you.

Benny:While enfeebled?

Benny:No, but it subtracts from the rule.

Gamemaster:Does enfeebling stop it from grappling?

Gamemaster:Well, yes, because it failed.

Gamemaster:Yeah, it just failed the check.

Gamemaster:And I can't rent anymore.

Gamemaster:So it's just going to make a claw attack on you, I think.

Gamemaster:A little bit of a claw attack.

Gamemaster:That's ridiculous.

Gamemaster:I'm so sorry.

Benny:What, it was... Oh, okay.

Arctos:Did I have third map?

Gamemaster:Oh, I'm sorry, I wasn't targeting you.

Gamemaster:It did that with map, I just rolled a 20.

Gamemaster:I apologize.

Gamemaster:You're going to take another 18 points of damage.

Johnny:Wait, that's a crit?

Arctos:Well, Benny's up.

Gamemaster:That's a crit.

Arctos:Map three.

Anzu:It was a natural 20, but it wasn't targeted, so it didn't go green.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:Does the damage double because it got a kick there?

Gamemaster:Yes.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I apologize.

Benny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Oh!

Gamemaster:And then the tiger's going to take four points of fire damage because it's on fire.

Gamemaster:And it's going to attempt a recovery check.

Anzu:All right.

Gamemaster:And it got a natural one, so it's still on fire.

Anzu:So it takes the damage again.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Anzu, it's your turn.

Anzu:He's on big fire now.

Johnny:Even better.

Gamemaster:No.

Benny:critical failure and recovery.

Benny:They're searching in the utility belt for the fire extinguisher.

Gamemaster:It just gets worse.

Benny:They pull out the gasoline and just dump it on the side.

Gamemaster:I'll do it.

Anzu:Indeed!

Anzu:So... Uh... My Unleashed Psyche has ended.

Anzu:Which means I'm stupefied.

Anzu:Can I just drag this onto myself?

Anzu:I can't.

Anzu:So... Anytime you attempt to cast a spell, the spell is disrupted unless you succeed.

Johnny:Hello.

Anzu:Okay, well the first thing I'm going to do is not casting a spell, but what it is is it's a continuation of a previous spell.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:As I will make an additional attack with my biting words from before at the rat.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Fighting words this rant.

Anzu:Because it lasts for a minute.

Anzu:It lasts for a minute or three attacks.

Anzu:Gosh dang it, it's not going to miss.

Anzu:Oh my gosh.

Gamemaster:I'm so sorry.

Anzu:I can't hit this rat.

Gamemaster:It's just sneaky rap.

Anzu:Okay, so that's one action.

Anzu:Then, with my second action, I'm going to attempt to cast another telekinetic rend amped.

Johnny:Thank you.

Anzu:So...

Anzu:I'm going to click the casting because I lose it if I miss with the stupefied, right?

Anzu:That's how that works.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Anzu:Oh, it did it for me.

Gamemaster:Oh, you succeed.

Gamemaster:So you can cast it.

Anzu:Okay, so this one is going one on the rat and then one on the tiger.

Anzu:Is there a world where I can get it to target the tiger and the cape without Arctos?

Anzu:I don't really think so, but if you'll allow it, I'll try it.

Gamemaster:No.

Gamemaster:No, you can target all three.

Gamemaster:You can't get the two of them without Arctos.

Anzu:No, we'll just do the tiger and the rat.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Gamemaster:So the rat and the tiger are going to make this fort save, or attempt this fort save.

Gamemaster:The tiger succeeds, so we'll take half damage.

Gamemaster:The rat critically fails.

Anzu:All right, well, that's good at least.

Arctos:Oh, cool, cool.

Anzu:Hopefully we get it soon.

Johnny:Get this rat out of here.

Anzu:Not a great number.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:All right.

Gamemaster:Uh, the rat only had eight hit points, so with a crit, that's still enough.

Gamemaster:It, uh... It deceases.

Johnny:Oh, wait.

Arctos:Cool, cool, cool.

Johnny:All right, we're up in the mix.

Gamemaster:And then the tiger is going to take half damage.

Anzu:Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Gamemaster:So it takes two points.

Gamemaster:Why does it take two points?

Gamemaster:Half of six is two.

Anzu:Does he have some resistance of some kind?

Benny:Fact check true.

Gamemaster:No.

Anzu:Well... Is it doing something weird with the two different damage types?

Gamemaster:I'm not really sure why it did that.

Gamemaster:It might be.

Anzu:That should still be three.

Gamemaster:It might be like... Well, it might be halving 5 to 2 and 1 to 0.

Anzu:Oh, well.

Johnny:I hate it when that happens.

Gamemaster:Either way, it's mortal.

Arctos:Thank you.

Anzu:Um... And... Oh, I wish my psyche was still unleashed.

Anzu:Um...

Anzu:All right.

Gamemaster:Don't you just hate it when you leave home and you forget to unleash your psyche?

Anzu:I will just, I guess, cast.

Anzu:Do I want to get closer?

Anzu:50, 40.

Anzu:Yeah, I'll get closer.

Anzu:Let me see what that does.

Anzu:25, 30.

Anzu:All right, I'll go there.

Johnny:uh um

Anzu:That's it.

Gamemaster:OK.

Gamemaster:Next up is Tywelwyn.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:What's Tywelwyn going to do?

Gamemaster:I think Tywelwyn is going to try and enfeeble Arctos.

Arctos:I wish it was a spell attack.

Gamemaster:Arctos, please make that fort save.

Arctos:Do I get Courageous Anthem for this?

Johnny:I think... Saves against fear.

Gamemaster:Yeah, so.

Gamemaster:That's a success.

Arctos:Cool.

Gamemaster:You're enfeebled.

Arctos:What does that do?

Gamemaster:Minus one to strength-based rolls and DCs.

Arctos:Gotcha, gotcha.

Gamemaster:Oh, I apologize.

Gamemaster:One second.

Gamemaster:I had to make an attack roll to see if the ray even hits you first.

Gamemaster:One second.

Gamemaster:Let's confirm that it hit.

Arctos:Cool.

Gamemaster:It did hit.

Johnny:Hmm.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Arctos:Oh.

Arctos:All right.

Gamemaster:It's going to then use action two to cast shield.

Gamemaster:And then it's going to use action three to move its sphere back onto Arctos.

Gamemaster:Arctos, make a reflex save.

Arctos:Well.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry, you're just closest.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:You are going to take full damage.

Gamemaster:11 points of fire damage.

Johnny:Yeah.

Arctos:Oof.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Johnny Insurgent.

Benny:Oh.

Johnny:First, we're going to Flourish Cast Soothe at second level on Benny over there.

Johnny:So you regain... Ooh, nice.

Benny:Oh.

Johnny:A good amount of healing.

Arctos:Amp.

Johnny:That's one action.

Johnny:Second action.

Johnny:I'm going to attempt to intimidate this tiger.

Johnny:I'll yell, meow!

Johnny:That's it.

Johnny:That's what I got.

Gamemaster:Okay, sure, yeah.

Gamemaster:Let's see if it's intimidated by somebody going meow at it.

Johnny:It was pretty catty.

Johnny:Does a 19...

Gamemaster:19 against its will, DC, is a success.

Johnny:Excellent.

Gamemaster:Just barely, but that's a success.

Arctos:Excellent, excellent.

Johnny:It's frightened one.

Johnny:And then for my last action, I will use a little bon mot against it.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Arctos:You can ignore that.

Gamemaster:That is a critical success.

Johnny:So because of my demagogue's calling and my new feat,

Anzu:Thank you.

Johnny:Where is it, where is it, where is it?

Johnny:My cool, where is this?

Johnny:Cutting Rebuke.

Johnny:It will take mental damage equal to double my level and Bone Maw affects it.

Gamemaster:Okay, double your level is 8 points of mental damage, which is enough to kill it outright.

Johnny:Oh.

Arctos:Delicious.

Johnny:Amazing.

Johnny:Even better.

Gamemaster:So you apply all of these status effects and then it just drops dead.

Johnny:I yell, meow!

Johnny:It just falls to the floor.

Gamemaster:And it dies.

Gamemaster:It dies just from... That was its thing, and you took it and paid that, so it gave up.

Johnny:Guys, that was my first kill of the campaign.

Gamemaster:Anything else?

Johnny:Nope, that's it.

Johnny:That was all three of my actions.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:That brings us to Arctos.

Arctos:All right, if I step here, I can swing at him.

Gamemaster:Mm-hmm.

Arctos:He's not really on blocks right now.

Gamemaster:Oh, that's true.

Gamemaster:One sec.

Gamemaster:Let me... Now he's on a grid.

Arctos:OK, I'll do that.

Arctos:And then I will take a swipe at Tywelwyn, I guess.

Johnny:Oh.

Benny:Thank you.

Arctos:Wait, wait, wait a second, wait a second, sorry.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Wait, give me a second.

Gamemaster:If you want to.

Arctos:Let me just double check one spell.

Arctos:So as a person who could cast this spell, I assume I would now.

Gamemaster:What are you trying to get rid of?

Arctos:If I could succeed on a Dispel Magic, could I try to take that cape out of the air?

Arctos:Or would that not work?

Gamemaster:Oh, yeah, I'll let you try and dispel the cape.

Arctos:The cape.

Arctos:OK, and then how does that counteract check work again?

Gamemaster:You're going to attempt a counteract check against the magic that is sustaining the cape.

Johnny:um

Gamemaster:So you roll a... I'm just going to click this button to see what it is.

Arctos:Sorry.

Gamemaster:It's your wisdom and your trained modifier, so it's a plus 10 to your roll.

Gamemaster:And then you're just going to attempt based on the level of the spell that is manifesting the cape.

Arctos:Cool.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:And if it's an item, it should become mundane for 10 minutes.

Gamemaster:Correct.

Gamemaster:A 28 is a success.

Gamemaster:You successfully counteract it so the cape just collapses to the ground.

Arctos:Great.

Arctos:Now I'll make my step there.

Arctos:So that's two actions.

Arctos:And then final action, I'll take a swipe at this man.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Strike.

Arctos:Hit.

Arctos:And damage.

Arctos:Oh, it's awful.

Gamemaster:Oof.

Arctos:Double ones, but.

Gamemaster:That's so sad.

Johnny:That was big.

Arctos:I'm okay with the keep thing.

Arctos:I'm okay with that.

Arctos:I'll keep that.

Gamemaster:You deal five points of damage.

Gamemaster:Notably, Quoen, who himself is not a werecreature, does not seem to take any additional silver damage here.

Arctos:Makes sense.

Arctos:Alright, that is my turn.

Arctos:Benny, I can heal you next turn if you need it.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Benny, it's your turn.

Benny:Fantastic.

Benny:Where would I have to get to?

Benny:Is this even a place I can be up here for flanking?

Gamemaster:No, you're standing on the wall.

Gamemaster:No, he's positioned himself such that you can't actually get behind him.

Gamemaster:He's sitting on a throne.

Benny:I see.

Johnny:That's all.

Arctos:Might as well stand next to me, then.

Benny:Wait, so even if I'm like here?

Arctos:That way we can .

Gamemaster:You can stand there, but that's just not flanking him.

Benny:No, but does this give the opportunity to flank?

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah, if somebody stood over here or over here, they could flank him.

Benny:Okay.

Benny:Well, I'll stand here in case.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:And this will be an intimidating strike.

Arctos:No, you're not going to double slice?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:No.

Gamemaster:He's going to Intimidating Strike.

Arctos:You double sliced all night.

Arctos:Now you're changing it up on us.

Johnny:What?

Benny:I know, because it's a...

Benny:I want to just hit very hard with the pick.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:He makes a Melee Strike.

Arctos:Oh.

Benny:All right, well.

Gamemaster:He doesn't roll very well on the Melee Strike.

Arctos:Divihira.

Benny:No.

Benny:We will hit him with the poly tool.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:What action are you using to hit him with a poly tool?

Gamemaster:Well, it doesn't matter because you missed anyway.

Benny:Oh, right, I moved.

Benny:Yeah, I moved.

Gamemaster:That's the end of your turn, yeah?

Johnny:you

Benny:Yeah, that's that's attorney.

Gamemaster:You're stupefied.

Anzu:Indeed.

Anzu:I will make my final strike with biting words.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Oh so sad.

Anzu:I miss.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry, because he's shielded and because you're stupefied, you miss.

Anzu:I don't think the biting words hit a single time.

Gamemaster:It did not.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Anzu:No matter.

Johnny:Thank you.

Anzu:I will cast at second level.

Anzu:I will look into Tywelwyn's eyes and then look past his eyes into his mind and just kind of tickle at his motor nerves and whatnot.

Anzu:And I will, well, I guess technically I will attempt to cast Agitate.

Anzu:I successfully cast Agitate.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Johnny:This guy.

Anzu:He must make this will save.

Gamemaster:He makes the will save.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:He critically succeeds the will save.

Anzu:Nothing happens!

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Anzu:Holy crap!

Arctos:i was playing boulder's gate and i was like man a lot of these spells as a wizard sucks because it's just save or die i was like that doesn't happen in pathfinder and then today

Gamemaster:Nothing happens.

Johnny:This guy.

Gamemaster:Sometimes that happens.

Gamemaster:Nothing happens.

Anzu:Um... That's just great.

Gamemaster:Nothing ever happens.

Anzu:Um...

Gamemaster:Oh, I'm sorry.

Anzu:I have one action left, but I'll just try to, I will attempt to cast shield.

Benny:you could tidy his eyeballs

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:It works.

Gamemaster:You cast shield.

Anzu:Oh, that's so tough.

Gamemaster:You can't tidy his eyeballs.

Arctos:All right, let's do it.

Gamemaster:It's Tywelwyn's turn.

Johnny:nah it doesn't have to be nah

Gamemaster:He's literally the only enemy on the field right now.

Gamemaster:I think he's going to reach out.

Gamemaster:I'm going to roll a d4.

Gamemaster:If it's even, it's Benny.

Gamemaster:If it's odd, it's Arctos.

Gamemaster:It's Arctos!

Gamemaster:We're going to attempt to Burning Hands Arctos.

Gamemaster:Make that reflex save.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:God damn it.

Arctos:Why doesn't he use attack rolls?

Gamemaster:Oh, I lied.

Gamemaster:You know what?

Gamemaster:I didn't see the area on this.

Gamemaster:It's a 15-foot cone.

Gamemaster:Benny and Arctos make this reflex safe.

Johnny:Dude.

Arctos:God damn this guy.

Arctos:All right, well, it's a failure.

Johnny:Uncool.

Benny:How many threes?

Johnny:No.

Benny:How many threes?

Benny:Oh my god.

Johnny:Penny.

Benny:Josh, can you reseed this?

Gamemaster:And Benny critically fails.

Gamemaster:No!

Gamemaster:I, like...

Benny:How many threes?

Benny:This is the fourth three I've rolled this fight.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:Listen, it's using the cryptographic node, like the cryptographic package in whatever browser you're using.

Gamemaster:So if you're rolling poorly, it's your fault.

Benny:Okay.

Gamemaster:Also, something I found out about Foundry, the rolls are client-side.

Arctos:Well, now I'm going to hack this.

Arctos:Yeah, so now we're going to... Don't tell us that, because next time all of us are going to be around like crits all the time.

Gamemaster:I don't know why they did that.

Gamemaster:Of course.

Johnny:Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny.

Arctos:Oh, God, what would happen?

Gamemaster:Okay, so failure, you take full damage.

Gamemaster:Critical failure, you take double the damage.

Gamemaster:9 or 18.

Gamemaster:Does he follow up by attempting to just burn one of your faces off?

Benny:Bye.

Gamemaster:Or does he shield?

Gamemaster:I think he's in attack mode.

Johnny:That's a great beat, wow.

Gamemaster:I think he's going to try and burn one of your faces off.

Arctos:I thought he would have shielded.

Gamemaster:Even Benny odd Arctos.

Gamemaster:We'll go for Arctos.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:Good thing one's... Reactive shield!

Gamemaster:This time we really are going for Arctos.

Gamemaster:He's going to attempt to claw you.

Anzu:The claw.

Gamemaster:The claw gets 24, so that hits.

Gamemaster:So it doesn't hit.

Anzu:That's crazy that Josh has rolled exactly the number for that to work twice.

Anzu:That's crazy.

Johnny:Oh no!

Gamemaster:Johnny, it's your turn.

Gamemaster:Your courageous anthem has dropped.

Johnny:That sucks so much.

Johnny:It's okay.

Johnny:I have two focus points.

Johnny:We'll get back to that.

Johnny:First action, I'm just going to attempt to intimidate Tywelwyn.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Do it.

Johnny:I'll look at him and I'll say, you know the problem with trying to kill a ghost, Tywelwyn?

Johnny:They just keep coming back.

Johnny:I'll demoralize this man.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Toen only barely gets the context on that because he is not the one who killed you last time.

Johnny:doesn't know who I am.

Johnny:He's like, what?

Johnny:I think there's some context missing.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:A20 is a failure.

Johnny:That's fine.

Gamemaster:He doesn't know who you are.

Johnny:That's fine.

Gamemaster:He's not intimidated.

Johnny:Second action, we'll do another lingering composition, Courageous Anthem.

Johnny:Do another performance rule.

Gamemaster:25 is a success.

Gamemaster:You get three more rounds.

Johnny:And then my last action, I will pull out my new favorite poem, The Rime and the Ancient Mariner, and I will cast Albatross Curse on this guy.

Arctos:Cool.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Johnny:So now everyone gets, as long as this bird is flying around his head, which he can try and take out, everyone gets a plus one circumstance bonus to attacks.

Johnny:Which does stack with Kratos Anthem.

Gamemaster:That's unfortunate.

Johnny:And that is my turn.

Gamemaster:Ark does.

Johnny:He's got bones.

Arctos:So when we just looked at him earlier, we could tell it was Tywelwyn because of the bones of his antler, right?

Arctos:OK.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Arctos:That's great.

Gamemaster:Why?

Arctos:Okay, okay.

Gamemaster:Oh, well, okay.

Gamemaster:So two things I want to clarify.

Gamemaster:One, antlers aren't actually bones, so that doesn't count.

Johnny:He's got bones.

Gamemaster:But two, he does have bones, so you can cast Bone Shaker on him.

Arctos:I was going to say, it's really sad that Josh created encounters with no more bones.

Arctos:He got rid of the bones.

Gamemaster:I heard you had Bone Shaker and I was like, no bones!

Johnny:It's like the shield of arrow catching all over again.

Arctos:Yeah, yeah.

Anzu:Oh, my God.

Anzu:Don't even get me started.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Okay, so... Yeah, yeah.

Gamemaster:He's gonna roll a fort save, yeah?

Gamemaster:How many actions did you spend to cast Bone Shaker?

Arctos:I just did one.

Gamemaster:So, two flourished down to one, or just one?

Arctos:Sorry, sorry.

Arctos:It's two down to one.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Arctos:Because three only gets me to move him more, right?

Johnny:No.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you get to pull the target around by their bones.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:OK.

Arctos:So it is a success.

Arctos:So yes.

Gamemaster:Yes, he succeeds.

Gamemaster:So he takes half damage.

Anzu:Thank you.

Gamemaster:And you don't get to move him around by his bones.

Arctos:OK.

Arctos:Oh, I thought it said he still gets.

Arctos:That's a shame.

Arctos:I thought it still did enfeebled, or does that have to be a fail?

Gamemaster:If...

Gamemaster:A full failure gives him enfeebled.

Gamemaster:Because he succeeded, he just takes half the damage.

Arctos:On Path Builder, it says if they succeed.

Arctos:Oh, that was if I did the third reaction.

Arctos:OK.

Arctos:Yes, okay.

Johnny:all right

Arctos:I understand now.

Arctos:So I will roll damage.

Arctos:That's so brutal.

Gamemaster:He will take four damage as you shake his bones.

Arctos:Alright, well.

Arctos:I will!

Arctos:Alright, I will first attempt a one-action heal thing for him.

Arctos:Not the spell heal.

Arctos:Actions, skills.

Arctos:This is on Benny man.

Arctos:Are you kidding me?

Gamemaster:Oh my god.

Gamemaster:Benny gets two hit points.

Benny:I'll take it.

Arctos:All right, well.

Johnny:um um

Gamemaster:Anything else?

Arctos:Not to be an ass.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:I think I get... I have Healing Hand, so... Oh, that's when I cast.

Anzu:Uh oh.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:Yeah, that's when you cast Heal.

Arctos:I guess... Alright, let me just... I have one more action, so I guess I will just cast one of my heals at rank 1.

Gamemaster:You do.

Gamemaster:You don't want to do the three action so that it heals Tywelwyn 2?

Arctos:I don't have the actions to do 2, because I can't double Flourish, so... Yeah, sad, right?

Gamemaster:Darn.

Gamemaster:Who are you healing?

Arctos:Benny.

Gamemaster:Not Tywelwyn?

Arctos:All right, that's finally we got some good rolls.

Gamemaster:Nice.

Arctos:All right.

Benny:I have.

Arctos:Cool.

Arctos:You can apply that, buddy.

Johnny:Thank you very much.

Gamemaster:All right, now it's Benny's turn.

Arctos:All right, and that's my turn.

Gamemaster:Benny, it's your turn.

Benny:Double slice.

Gamemaster:Double slice.

Gamemaster:Make two strikes.

Benny:This time we'll do the normal order.

Gamemaster:OK.

Gamemaster:That does unfortunately miss.

Benny:Actually, I missed.

Benny:That's absolutely crazy.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:24 does hit, though.

Arctos:Mike and Tanner haven't been able to roll above a 10 on ability checks.

Johnny:What's happening right now?

Arctos:And then I haven't been able to roll above a 6 on any other deck.

Benny:The poly tool hit.

Gamemaster:The polytool hits.

Gamemaster:You deal 14 points of bludgeoning damage, which means that Tywelwyn is bloodied!

Johnny:What's happening right now?

Anzu:Uh-oh.

Johnny:Finally.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:Can I have Benny and Arctos please make this reflex save as the fire inside Tywelwyn's ember shell explodes out of it.

Benny:Of course, of course.

Arctos:Yeah, why would I succeed?

Gamemaster:Benny succeeds, Arctos fails.

Gamemaster:You're supposed to roll better.

Johnny:Big Bear remember, not Dexi.

Gamemaster:17 points of bludgeoning damage halved for Benny.

Gamemaster:17 points of bludgeoning and fire damage halved for Benny.

Gamemaster:Alright, Benny, it's still your turn.

Benny:yes of course the turn benny's turn uh we're at this point at two map we are going to hail mary oh wait hold on we're gonna help her we're overdue for a crit uh

Arctos:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Give up.

Gamemaster:Declare that you want to work with Tywelwyn.

Gamemaster:We killed your old crew so we could be your new crew, is what this is.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry, that does miss.

Gamemaster:It's Azu's turn.

Gamemaster:You're still stupefied, or it's been two turns so you're no longer stupefied?

Anzu:I think it should be over now.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I think it is over now.

Anzu:So, oh, it's because I have, oh, sorry.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Anzu:Oh, no.

Anzu:Now I don't have the thing.

Gamemaster:Now you do.

Anzu:And now that the Stoopify is over, I can re-unleash my psyche.

Arctos:Yeah.

Anzu:And the gameplay loop begins anew.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:This is the first time we've gotten so far into an encounter, which I'm sorry it's running as late as it is.

Gamemaster:I figure there's just one enemy we can try and finish him instead of picking up tomorrow.

Arctos:Yeah, we're gonna take a break.

Arctos:Yeah.

Anzu:I think I'm just going to try to agitate him again.

Anzu:Okay.

Gamemaster:Go for it.

Gamemaster:Try and agitate Mr. Tywelwyn.

Gamemaster:That is a success.

Johnny:uh...

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Anzu:It works for one round.

Arctos:Great.

Anzu:On his turn, he must either...

Anzu:Use an action to stride or take, it should be a 4d8 mental damage because I cast it at second level.

Gamemaster:All right.

Arctos:You gave me ADHD.

Anzu:Then we will send a Psiburst his way.

Gamemaster:Of course.

Johnny:Mind bird!

Arctos:Man, man.

Gamemaster:He fails.

Anzu:All right.

Anzu:Oh, OK.

Johnny:Yeah, tables are turning.

Gamemaster:He takes the three damage.

Johnny:Mind bird!

Anzu:Yeah, I mean, it's not a lot, even if it rolls high.

Benny:Thank you.

Anzu:So then with my final action, probably I just cast Shield again.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:I ran out of biting words, so we just cast Shield.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:That brings us to Tywelwyn.

Gamemaster:Now, Tywelwyn has a few problems.

Gamemaster:First, there's an albatross flying around his head that is giving you guys a bonus to attack him.

Gamemaster:I don't think he likes that, so he is going to attack it.

Gamemaster:The other is that he's agitated, so he needs to move, but he is physically incapable of doing that.

Johnny:That's crazy.

Anzu:Oh.

Gamemaster:So, I think he just has this looming guillotine over his head, knowing that he's going to take damage at the end of his turn.

Anzu:Wait, what?

Arctos:It's such a shame I failed the bone thing because I could have tore him out of his seat.

Johnny:So he killed the bird.

Gamemaster:Yes, so he spends his first action to punch the Burt to death.

Johnny:Okay, so he has to make a will save.

Gamemaster:He rolled very poorly and fails.

Johnny:The albatross hangs around a cord from his neck for one minute, cursing him for transgression.

Arctos:Great.

Johnny:During this time, he has to roll twice and take the worst result on his next will save.

Gamemaster:Okay, he is disadvantaged on the next will save he makes.

Gamemaster:Sag into action.

Gamemaster:Is gonna be... A Divine Lance.

Johnny:He just hates this bear.

Gamemaster:I think Anzu is actually the one who's consistently done the most damage to him.

Gamemaster:So I'm gonna roll a d4.

Gamemaster:If it's a 1, it's Benny.

Gamemaster:If it's 2, it's Arctos.

Gamemaster:If it's 3 or 4, it's Anzu.

Gamemaster:He hates Arctos so much.

Gamemaster:I even changed the number.

Gamemaster:Arctos, you're taking a Divine Lance to the face.

Arctos:All right.

Benny:Manipulate.

Johnny:you

Benny:Manipulate spotted.

Gamemaster:This is a manipulate.

Gamemaster:And he missed.

Arctos:Yeah, that's what he gets.

Benny:Manipulate spotted.

Gamemaster:That hits.

Gamemaster:14 points of damage.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:He's not looking great.

Gamemaster:And he misses, and then as his third action, he's going to cast Shield.

Arctos:All right.

Gamemaster:And now that his turn has ended and he hasn't moved, Azu, can you roll the damage of your Agitate?

Johnny:Oh, that's a lot of damage.

Johnny:Oh my god.

Benny:That's crazy.

Anzu:He takes 25 points of mental damage.

Johnny:That's a lot of damage.

Arctos:I can see it.

Anzu:ADHD damage.

Benny:The agitate is just like... I bet he can't move or some dumb shit.

Gamemaster:One second.

Benny:I'm going to cast agitate twice on him and just watch him fucking twist in his own grave in pain.

Gamemaster:Can you guys see his health bar?

Benny:No, it disappeared for me.

Anzu:Oh, yes, yes.

Benny:Oh, no, I can see it now.

Gamemaster:Can you see the number?

Benny:No.

Arctos:No.

Anzu:No.

Johnny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Oh, that's unfortunate.

Gamemaster:He has 24 hit points currently.

Anzu:Mindburn!

Arctos:Oh yeah.

Johnny:Oh.

Gamemaster:Mindbird, please describe how your agitate kills Dwellwind.

Benny:Thank you.

Anzu:Um... His, uh...

Arctos:He's a tweaker.

Anzu:his brain is trying to force him to move and sending signals to his nerves and his muscles to make him move.

Anzu:But he both chooses and also cannot move.

Anzu:And so his muscles all activate and just start to tear and burst and whatever, something nasty like that.

Johnny:crazy wow

Gamemaster:And Tywelwyn just rips himself apart and collapses to the ground.

Gamemaster:A burnt-out, agitated husk.

Arctos:Josh, I was going to cast this spell.

Arctos:How would that have worked with him in the chair?

Gamemaster:Vanishing Touch?

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:So if I cast it, yeah.

Gamemaster:You can move him.

Gamemaster:He can't move.

Anzu:Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:So if you moved him, well, you would have just launched him into the wall behind him.

Gamemaster:So... He's not, like, physically attached to the chair.

Arctos:Would he have gone, or would he have gone with his chair?

Gamemaster:You could have knocked... What probably would have happened is you would have knocked him into the wall behind him and he would have taken bludgeoning damage but not actually moved anywhere.

Arctos:Okay.

Johnny:Okay.

Arctos:Alright.

Arctos:Alright, alright.

Arctos:Well, we got them, boys.

Gamemaster:You did.

Gamemaster:You murdered Tywelwyn and his gang of Roundhats.

Gamemaster:And we will pick up next session.

Gamemaster:You're still in a faint.

Gamemaster:We're not gonna... I mean, next week is New Year's, so I assume... I don't... Yeah, I mean, unless you guys are around on the 29th, that's Monday.

Arctos:Yeah, bye week.

Arctos:I think I'm around, so I will confirm.

Johnny:I am around on Monday, if you guys would like.

Anzu:Alrighty.

Anzu:I am, but if folks aren't, you know, folks aren't.

Anzu:I don't have control over that.

Benny:I'll also be around.

Benny:No.

Gamemaster:Jorge?

Gamemaster:Okay, so let's plan for next week, Monday, then.

Arctos:Sounds good.

Gamemaster:And if people end up having plans, then we'll have a bye week.

Anzu:Alright.

Arctos:Sounds good.

Anzu:Will I be seeing anybody on Saturday?

Benny:Not mainly.

Gamemaster:For... Oh my god.

Johnny:I'm actually, I got a thing on Shore Island, so I'm sorry.

Arctos:Oh, for the... Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Arctos:No, we're going.

Arctos:Thank you for reminding.

Arctos:I know it's on Bailey's calendar.

Arctos:I already know what fruit or vegetable I'm bringing.

Anzu:That's exciting.

Arctos:Yes.

Anzu:Noah, for context, we're having a bit of a holiday party.

Anzu:If you happen to find yourself on Long Island on Saturday, you can come.

Gamemaster:How unfortunate.

Arctos:Oh, yeah.

Johnny:I hope you guys have fun.

Anzu:We're having a white elephant exchange.

Anzu:Produce items only from the grocery store.

Johnny:That's really fun.

Benny:Oh, God.

Arctos:What if it's like from a produce cart that's outside the grocery store?

Anzu:That is acceptable.

Anzu:A produce item.

Anzu:Some kind of fruit or vegetable.

Johnny:Well, Merry Christmas, everyone.

Anzu:Thank you.

Arctos:What if Noah's sense of produce and it's just like a bean, like a single legume in like saran wrap?

Anzu:That would be crazy.

Gamemaster:Merry Christmas.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Johnny:Bye everyone.

Arctos:By the time it gets here, it already started, like, sprouting.

Arctos:Yep.

Anzu:Well, all right then.

Anzu:I'll see you guys around.

Arctos:Alright.

Gamemaster:See ya.

Arctos:See ya.

Benny:See ya.