2026-3-3 — Akasha

Arctos:Recording.

Arctos:Stay, Misha.

Arctos:Yo, yo, how are you?

Johnny:Yo, yo, yo.

Johnny:I'm good.

Johnny:How you doing, man?

Arctos:Oh, doing well.

Johnny:Hi, Tanner.

Arctos:Yo, Tan Man.

Arctos:Oh, Tanner was playing Ark.

Anzu:Hello, hello.

Arctos:Oh, hello.

Johnny:Hello.

Anzu:I'm here, I'm ready.

Anzu:I don't know what's going to happen today.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Not to metagame, Noah should do the recap.

Arctos:Because I want him to have two rerolls.

Johnny:Nah.

Arctos:Unless you want Arctos to do the talking, because I can also talk to people.

Anzu:No, no, that sounds pretty good.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:I got this one.

Johnny:I have many rerolls because I have mythic rerolls and then I have a feat that lets me reroll a failed skill check once a day.

Johnny:So I feel like they're... Yeah, it's a reincarnation feat.

Anzu:Where does that come from?

Arctos:Reincarnate?

Anzu:Hmm.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:I think Pathbuilder is down again, but it's a reincarnation, and it's literally just called... Oh, you did it.

Arctos:Yeah.

Anzu:What?

Arctos:Yeah, I messaged you guys.

Arctos:No one reads my messages.

Anzu:You messaged us that it was down again?

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:You messaged just three minutes ago.

Arctos:No one reads my messages.

Arctos:Gosh.

Anzu:Short.

Anzu:I was downstairs getting a cookie.

Arctos:That's messed up.

Anzu:How am I supposed to read your message?

Johnny:Very good.

Anzu:Excellent.

Arctos:Speaking of texts, did you see that Donald Trump texted Iran like eight days ago?

Anzu:Now he feels seen.

Johnny:Whoa, a text.

Johnny:Like, he texted Khomeini?

Arctos:Yeah, there was.

Arctos:No, no, no.

Arctos:So there was a mass text to people of Iran that said the U.S.

Johnny:Oh, the people of Iran.

Arctos:president is a man of action.

Arctos:Wait and see.

Arctos:And this was a week ago.

Anzu:I didn't know he could send text messages to an entire nation like that.

Arctos:Well, it was anonymous, so it might have not been him, but it was... Yeah.

Benny:He can.

Johnny:What?

Johnny:What an insane move.

Anzu:That is kind of crazy.

Benny:And they all went on Polymarket and immediately cashed in strikes by the end of the month.

Johnny:I did actually see several things where people made hundreds of thousands of dollars on that.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:There was also a...

Arctos:What was it?

Arctos:Oh, yeah, never mind.

Arctos:But yeah, crazy, crazy amounts.

Anzu:Look who decided to show up.

Benny:Yeah, the thing about... Finally.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:I'll leave if you don't want me here.

Benny:Yeah, I think we got this.

Johnny:That's the win condition.

Gamemaster:Okay, that's fine.

Benny:Josh joins at 11.

Gamemaster:You guys let me know how it goes.

Benny:We're like, we won.

Benny:They're all dead.

Gamemaster:Who's they in this situation?

Johnny:Yeah.

Anzu:Yeah, my problem is I don't know where we're going with the campaign, so I don't know how to win.

Benny:The six interlopers.

Benny:Oh, we just go and kill the interlopers.

Anzu:Okay.

Johnny:That tracks for me.

Gamemaster:Which interlopers?

Benny:Anyone we deem as an interloper.

Gamemaster:Oh, okay, sure.

Anzu:Yeah, Josh, we're all out of bubblegum, so we're coming for everybody.

Gamemaster:I mean, that... Oh, yeah.

Benny:We're actually holding on bubble gum.

Gamemaster:You're here to kick bubblegum and chew ass and you're all out of ass?

Gamemaster:I get it.

Johnny:Yeah, the poncho boy is your mother-in-law's true ass.

Anzu:Noah, I really enjoy your shirt.

Johnny:Oh, thank you.

Johnny:It's my only flannel, so I decided to make it all of them.

Anzu:I was going to say, it's like six flannels into one.

Benny:Tanner's overstimulated.

Anzu:It's beautiful.

Arctos:Did you guys ever see there was some viral clip two years ago from someone from Africa looking at a factory-made shirt, not realizing it was factory-made, and being like, this has a lot of patterns.

Johnny:Yeah, this did cost me three goats.

Arctos:It must be very expensive.

Arctos:There was a long time on Twitter or Instagram where people would look at a shirt like Noah's and be like, that's a lot of patterns.

Arctos:It's probably very expensive.

Benny:Terrible.

Johnny:So I'm low on goats.

Arctos:Yeah.

Anzu:Holy.

Gamemaster:Ooh, that's like a full dowry.

Johnny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:That's crazy.

Johnny:If anyone's got some wheat or brick they want to trade.

Johnny:I need some livestock.

Arctos:I think it was Dubai like 20 years ago.

Arctos:They set a cap on dowries.

Arctos:The prince was just like, hey, this is too expensive for Dubai people because apparently a lot of Dubai men were marrying foreigners because they couldn't afford like the dowries of Dubai women.

Arctos:So then the prince was just like, all right, I'm capping it to like $20,000 and I'm paying for all of it.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:No more of this shit.

Arctos:We want more Dubai, Dubai.

Gamemaster:It's because it's inflation.

Gamemaster:It used to be just one goat, and now it's just costs are out of control.

Benny:we should be asking you josh oh guys i'm

Gamemaster:I get it.

Arctos:Yeah, but also people in Dubai also, I bet you just knew how much money some of these guys had.

Arctos:So like, no, no, we can get more out of him.

Arctos:And he's like, I'll just go somewhere else.

Gamemaster:No.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Why are people DDoSing Pathbuilder?

Johnny:He just provides such a... Is it because... I opened up B.T.L.

Gamemaster:Why would I DDoS Pathbuilder?

Benny:I'm gonna be late today.

Benny:I'm debugging my bot.

Anzu:He was busy launching his attack.

Gamemaster:Wow.

Gamemaster:That's it.

Benny:I'm debugging my botnet.

Benny:Give me five minutes.

Johnny:and I saw that Benny was still fighting Sbrtlby in the darkness.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Gamemaster:It's been going on a while.

Johnny:It's still... Did... That's a real fun fact to have off the top of your head.

Arctos:Also, on a side note, I googled it and found it on the UAE legislation, and it actually is $20,000.

Arctos:And I'm a little ashamed that I know that.

Gamemaster:Ha ha ha.

Arctos:Like, it's actually $20,000 is the limit, and deferred is $30,000, and this was made in the 90s.

Arctos:It is really kind of weird that I knew that.

Benny:Let's see.

Johnny:Just cold, out-of-pocket...

Johnny:Know what the is.

Arctos:I saw that, like, yeah.

Arctos:I saw that like three years ago and I was like, this is a fact I should know forever.

Johnny:I can never forget this.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:This is my fun fact.

Anzu:Thank you.

Gamemaster:You always need one.

Arctos:I don't know anyone from Dubai.

Gamemaster:But if you ever meet one, you know what to ask.

Arctos:Yeah, it is really funny when someone tells me where they're from and I have a hyper specific.

Arctos:knowledge about that country.

Johnny:Thank you.

Arctos:You're always like, what the fuck do you know that?

Gamemaster:Do you have hyper-specific knowledge about any other countries?

Arctos:A good amount of countries.

Arctos:And when someone brings something up, I can see their face being like, oh, yeah.

Gamemaster:Huh.

Gamemaster:What is the conversion from dirham to US dollar?

Gamemaster:I want to know if 20,000 dirhams is a lot of money or not a lot of money.

Anzu:Depends on the goat.

Arctos:Well, I'm sure someone's Googling it, so I'll just wait.

Gamemaster:Oh, it's 20,000 dirhams is $5,400.

Johnny:It's still like... Let's see what the Go market at the UAE is.

Gamemaster:Now, what is the market rate of a goat?

Gamemaster:Goat reports.

Anzu:Is it an attractive goat?

Johnny:In 2025, the...

Gamemaster:What makes a goat attractive?

Benny:How many Super Bowls they've won?

Benny:That's it?

Arctos:I didn't expect it from you, Tanner.

Anzu:I got Jorge with that one.

Johnny:Oh.

Arctos:It was amazing.

Arctos:Amazing.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Okay, so I'm on livestockmarket.com.

Gamemaster:And they go anywhere from $150 to $600 a head.

Anzu:Okay.

Arctos:That's a lot of goats.

Gamemaster:So we'll say $350.

Gamemaster:That's 15 and a half goats.

Anzu:Oh, man.

Johnny:That's a good herd.

Gamemaster:That's a big dowry.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:That's crazy.

Gamemaster:I don't even know where you'd get 15 and a half goats in Dubai.

Johnny:What's the ROI on a goat?

Arctos:Well, it depends.

Arctos:Are you going to try to run a landscaping business?

Johnny:I think we'll do milk and landscaping.

Arctos:Or any yoga?

Johnny:Oh, we do all three.

Anzu:Oh, these are some busy goats.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:Working three jobs.

Anzu:My goat has three jobs.

Anzu:What are you doing?

Anzu:My goat is out there grinding.

Benny:Her hands look like this and it's just the goat hooves, so mine can look like this.

Arctos:Can you see if you have anything on water buffaloes?

Gamemaster:The users of goatfarmindia.in are pretty enthusiastic about goat farming.

Gamemaster:They see a 30-50% ROI per goat.

Johnny:Wow, that's pretty good.

Gamemaster:That's not bad.

Benny:That's the tomato plant tweet.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Johnny:That's such a deep callback, Jorge.

Gamemaster:I think the problem is there's not going to be a waterbuffalofarmindia.in for me to look at to see, you know.

Arctos:I'm just going to Google Gemini.

Arctos:I'm just going to tell Gemini, what's the ROI on a water buffalo?

Gamemaster:I could tell you about the ROI of a water buffalo in Farming Simulator, which is identical to that of a cow, apparently, because it produces five times less milk than a cow, but its milk is five times more valuable than a cow's.

Arctos:Lazy, lazy design.

Anzu:Whoa.

Gamemaster:Hydrationandcooling.com has an article called Maximizing Performance with Modern Water Buffalo Technology.

Johnny:I found an article from Vice saying a farmer bought two water buffalo at an auction and they killed them the next day.

Gamemaster:Would that help you?

Benny:Is this just like general productivity and the technology is water buffalo or is this maximizing water buffalo productivity?

Gamemaster:I'm guessing...

Johnny:Is that hopeful?

Arctos:They killed the farmer or the buffalo?

Johnny:The farmer.

Johnny:The buffalo killed the farmer.

Anzu:Yikes.

Arctos:Wait, actually... Well, I know with pigs also, you have to be careful, because sometimes pigs might try to eat you, so you have to kill them.

Johnny:You pigs eat anything.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Also, a lot of pig farms now in the US are owned by Chinese farms.

Arctos:And when you track the amount of microplastics in it, it's drastically gone up.

Arctos:So just remember that when you're eating a...

Arctos:most pork now you're going to be eating a lot of plastic.

Benny:work.

Gamemaster:Okay, so this isn't water buffalo, but it's close.

Gamemaster:I found an article called... This is a research paper published by the Diversity of Animal and Agricultural Sciences in Indonesia called Analysis of Swamp Buffalo Farming Business and its Productivity in the Central Java Province of Indonesia, which found an ROI of 11.6% on average from raising water buffalo.

Johnny:Oh, that's pretty good.

Arctos:I think you've got to get your numbers up because Gemini thinks we can get 20-40% net return in Southeast Asia.

Gamemaster:Okay, well, I have an actual article that I'm quoting.

Gamemaster:Gemini's just making stuff up.

Gamemaster:Gemini's not even been to central Indonesia.

Gamemaster:How would it know?

Johnny:He's got you.

Johnny:Gemini's never been to Central Indonesia.

Arctos:They're using the ResearchGate and FarmAdvisoryService.com Yeah.

Benny:oh no need to read the primary sources

Anzu:That sounds decent.

Arctos:Yeah, so, you know.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I still think goats are better than water buffalo for profit.

Arctos:I think goats are, like, the most efficient livestock animal to raise.

Gamemaster:Just, you know.

Johnny:That's true.

Arctos:Like, when they've done studies, like, they mature super quick.

Arctos:You get dairy and meat.

Arctos:They're pretty hardy.

Anzu:Okay, noted.

Benny:You can use them in rituals.

Gamemaster:I don't think many religions require goats in rituals anymore.

Gamemaster:Which is a real shame.

Arctos:Does Islam sacrifice goats or other animals?

Gamemaster:I feel like more people would show up to their local synagogue if we still sacrificed a goat every Saturday.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:But like, if I went to my local mosque, I don't think they're just sacrificing a goat.

Arctos:You can do it in, I think it's Minnesota City.

Arctos:They passed an ordinance that you're allowed to ritual slaughter within Minnesota City.

Gamemaster:I'm not in Minnesota City.

Arctos:Well, I'm just saying, that's the closest you can go for a goat sacrifice.

Johnny:We're giving you solutions.

Benny:Yeah, Josh, if you have a bloodlust, let us fix it.

Johnny:We're giving you problems.

Arctos:Just try to solve your problems.

Johnny:We're just trying to help.

Gamemaster:Is this real?

Benny:Ritual slaughter laws, US.

Benny:Huh.

Gamemaster:Okay, I guess that counts.

Arctos:What?

Gamemaster:I mean, like, under the definition that they're using for ritual slaughter here, I think technically, like, all kosher preparation of food counts as, of, like, meat counts as ritual slaughter, because you have to follow religious laws when killing the animal.

Johnny:It'd be so much funnier, though, if synagogues had to ritually sacrifice chickens and a big star of David.

Johnny:Everyone's chanting the Shema.

Gamemaster:That would be fun.

Gamemaster:I would enjoy that.

Gamemaster:Like if we had a big magic circle on the floor, but the magic circle is just like a bunch of, there's a menorah.

Gamemaster:And then, yeah, it'd be great.

Johnny:It's beautiful.

Gamemaster:From what I can tell is that there are some Muslims in Minnesota that celebrate Eid with a ritually slaughtered goat, which is to say like a properly halal prepared goat.

Johnny:Looks like a fun way.

Benny:I do think it's weird, the phrasing.

Benny:It's like, ritual slaughter is legal in the US, but only for religious purposes.

Benny:And it's like, oh, so what's ritual slaughter?

Benny:It's like, it's killing something for religious purposes.

Benny:It's like, oh.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Benny:So you're allowed to kill things for religious purposes, but only if they're for religious purposes.

Gamemaster:Correct.

Arctos:Is there like... Yeah, it's actually allowed in all 50 states.

Gamemaster:If you kill something for religious purposes, not for religious purposes, then you've done something wrong.

Benny:Violated the law.

Johnny:This law brought to you by the Department of Redundancy Department.

Benny:In association with the second Department of Redundancy.

Arctos:I think it was covered by Supreme Court for the First Amendment.

Arctos:And then Minnesota has another ordinance that's allowed within one of their cities.

Arctos:I forget their city.

Gamemaster:The girl sacrificed silly.

Johnny:Okay, it's Red Hook, and I know because I've walked by there before.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:There's also places, I forget where, in upper Manhattan where you could get freshly killed chicken.

Gamemaster:Yum.

Arctos:No, no, there's another place.

Arctos:Because Red Hood's Brooklyn.

Arctos:I'm pretty sure there's one in upper Manhattan.

Johnny:Because when me and Daisy came out for Tanner's wedding, we ended up walking through Red Hook by accident.

Johnny:And there was just a lot of places where they were pretty openly slaughtering animals.

Johnny:It was crazy.

Anzu:Damn.

Arctos:You see, that's funny because if you told me you're in Red Hook, I could have given you some really nice, cutesy art stuff to do and some good lobster rolls and barbecue.

Johnny:We ended up in like a... We ended up in like a cool...

Arctos:You know what?

Arctos:Now that I say it, the barbecue might be really fresh.

Arctos:That's why it's really good.

Johnny:Sort of indoor shopping area.

Johnny:It was fun.

Arctos:Oh, yeah.

Johnny:We just walked through a very sketchy area to get there.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Cool.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:In West Harlem, there's a place called La Graña Live Poultry Corporation, which might be... I can see that.

Arctos:That's it.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:They got hit hard when there was the bird flu going around.

Arctos:And people were like, what am I going to do?

Arctos:I can't just walk down the street and get some freshly warmed chicken.

Arctos:And you're like, oh.

Johnny:Where am I going to get my chicken sashimi?

Gamemaster:But...

Gamemaster:I would be very interested to know, having never had a freshly slaughtered chicken or not realized it, if I have, I'd be curious to know if it's better than, like, you know, just regular good chicken.

Arctos:Really good.

Arctos:It's really good.

Arctos:So I know this because I went to Dominican Republic as a kid.

Arctos:I think I was like six.

Arctos:I had a cold.

Arctos:And my grandma was just like, oh, you need chicken soup.

Arctos:And I remember sitting outside with her.

Arctos:She just grabbed a chicken and spun it.

Johnny:Dude, your DR cousins are crazy.

Johnny:Isn't one of your DR cousins the one who grabbed the tarantula and was like, ha ha ha?

Arctos:Crushed it.

Arctos:Yeah, yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:People forget what life is like outside of the U.S.

Arctos:It's... Or I guess Europe.

Arctos:Western life.

Arctos:But yeah.

Gamemaster:I mean, I know my grandmother used to do something similar.

Gamemaster:They, like, kept trout in the bathtub and they would slaughter chickens by, like, with a grugger.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Polish?

Johnny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah, she was Polish.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:My great grandma used to do that too.

Johnny:My mom...

Johnny:He talks about how she would grab the chicken until its body flew off.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:The...

Anzu:Hmm.

Arctos:I remember when we went there also, because when my family goes, they're like, my parents help out, like helping pay for the farm and stuff.

Arctos:So it's always like a big thing when they go.

Arctos:So we were there and they're like, we're going to make goat.

Arctos:So they like built a goat.

Arctos:But it was like right near my bedroom.

Arctos:And they just like, I guess using something blunt.

Arctos:And it took way too long.

Arctos:And it was really loud.

Arctos:As a kid, I was like, what?

Arctos:The next day, my mom's like, oh, you should try this.

Arctos:And I'm like, I'm not eating that.

Arctos:I'm not eating that shit.

Arctos:No.

Gamemaster:Bet it was good.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Bet you missed out.

Arctos:And then they also they had a big dairy farm or they still do.

Arctos:But one of the nights we were there, they woke up and like 10 of the cows were gunned down because they didn't find out for like six months later.

Johnny:no you

Arctos:But some guy a couple of towns over was jealous and just like drove by and just shot a bunch of the cows and then left.

Arctos:And then by the time they got there, the meat was unusable.

Arctos:But yeah, third world countries for you.

Gamemaster:Poor cows.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I mean, I guess there wasn't really a good end for them even if they didn't get shot.

Gamemaster:But still, poor cows.

Arctos:Well, they would have done.

Arctos:They would have been dairy cows.

Arctos:And then once they were getting the end of the life, then they would have been more humanely.

Arctos:You know what?

Arctos:I don't know if they would have humanely done it.

Arctos:After I heard what they did with that goat, I did get an ad on Instagram, though, where it opened up with someone shooting it.

Johnny:Yeah.

Benny:you you

Arctos:Ow.

Arctos:And I was like, what the fuck?

Arctos:It was a buffalo.

Arctos:It was a free-range buffalo.

Arctos:And then they're just like, we're a regenerative meat farm.

Arctos:Most of them will hide.

Arctos:It was like a whole thing talking about how like factory farming is awful and all the animals are sad and everything.

Arctos:But they do it really humanely and swiftly out on the pasture where they then harvest it.

Arctos:And I was like, this is crazy.

Arctos:But I did order some.

Arctos:So I will let you know.

Johnny:Was it good?

Arctos:It was recent.

Arctos:This just recently happened.

Arctos:I was like, this is fucking crazy.

Arctos:But it really humane.

Arctos:All of the certifications.

Gamemaster:So the advertising worked.

Arctos:Yeah, yeah.

Arctos:Because, I mean, something does die, so it is nice to know it's... The cow looked really happy and it was really quick and it was just on the pasture.

Benny:That's so... It's like one of the Netflix... They action-packed the first part of Netflix movies now because otherwise people get off.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:So you need something that's attention-catching.

Benny:So they just have an execution.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:We're actually the good people.

Benny:That was just to get your attention.

Benny:This is all very humane.

Benny:We're kind.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:This is the best kind of farming.

Benny:It's like having a fucking chicken and someone in a fucking ISIS mask is just sawing the chicken's head off.

Benny:This is actually humane.

Benny:The knife works very quickly.

Benny:Why would you make it look like an execution video to start the fucking ad?

Johnny:I don't know if I want to watch this.

Arctos:I just sent it to you guys on Instagram.

Arctos:It's really humane.

Arctos:And actually it turned me around on it.

Arctos:I was like, wow.

Gamemaster:the last time i checked my instagram for things that Jorge sent me it was like eight reels of people saying variations of fuck you josh you suck so like

Johnny:Jorge, my algorithm on Instagram is entirely just videos that you send me.

Arctos:Yeah, well, you're going to see some.

Johnny:Now it's going to be that?

Anzu:I saw those too.

Benny:The ad is so much worse than how Jorge described it.

Johnny:Thank you.

Benny:They show a buffalo getting executed at the beginning, and then the next 15 seconds are factory farm torture houses.

Arctos:But guys, this one's actually good.

Benny:So they're like, boom, and then it dies.

Benny:It's like, look, that wasn't so bad.

Benny:You still think it's bad?

Benny:Look at this fucking shaking cow in a slaughterhouse, and it's just like fucking tweaking out because they didn't kill it correctly.

Benny:There's people gone by with the fucking...

Benny:the pneumatic piston and just doming cows, it's so much worse.

Gamemaster:This doesn't make me want to purchase food.

Gamemaster:This makes me want to never purchase cow again.

Arctos:Well, there's two correct responses to this.

Gamemaster:I don't want to purchase their cow.

Anzu:No, you're supposed to purchase their cow.

Arctos:The response is you either go vegetarian or you go, wow, I need to stop eating the other one.

Gamemaster:They just shot a buffalo in a field.

Johnny:I have a very specific Jewish question for Josh.

Johnny:Josh, did you go to Hebrew school?

Gamemaster:Yes.

Johnny:Did you have the day where they showed you a video of kosher chicken farming and it made you never want to eat chicken ever again?

Gamemaster:Yep.

Johnny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah, absolutely.

Johnny:Horrifying.

Johnny:I...

Gamemaster:No, I don't know why they do that.

Gamemaster:Well, I know why they do that, but I don't know why they do that.

Johnny:Yeah, I was in like fourth grade when they were like, this is something you need to know.

Johnny:And I was like, now I'm traumatized.

Gamemaster:Yeah, we had it sandwiched between... We had a cooking class, so I peeled a potato.

Gamemaster:And then after that, we did some play reenactment of Paru.

Gamemaster:It was a good time.

Johnny:That's great.

Johnny:That's a crazy sandwich.

Arctos:Did you guys have you guys seen the video of Jamie Oliver like 15 years ago cooking for a bunch of kids to show them what's in a chicken nugget?

Arctos:And he like took different parts of like the chicken and then was like grounded in like a food processor and then cooked it and fried it.

Arctos:And then he's like, raise your hand if you'd still eat this.

Arctos:It's really good.

Arctos:He looks so defeated.

Anzu:Take a nugget.

Benny:you

Johnny:Real backfire there.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I sent a link in the chat to a little video on Jamie Oliver and chicken nuggets.

Arctos:Oh, yeah.

Gamemaster:Because he's done that bit in multiple TV shows.

Gamemaster:And sometimes the kids are like, oh yeah, I absolutely still want a chicken nugget.

Gamemaster:And other times he smells the chicken and he has the children smell the chicken.

Gamemaster:and get them to agree that the chicken smells more clean than the pink goop for the chicken nugget?

Gamemaster:It's weird.

Gamemaster:Here's a weird fixation on chicken nuggets.

Arctos:He probably was like, well, they'll still eat it.

Arctos:I gotta make them smell it.

Arctos:He was probably trying to make it weirder and weirder.

Johnny:It's like, no, I don't want to eat these.

Johnny:This is weird.

Benny:You're going to eat a whole carton of chicken nuggets if you like them so much.

Johnny:Pulls out a cigarette carton of chicken nuggets.

Anzu:My mother actually has a very similar philosophy.

Arctos:I know Bailey's philosophy is, she's like, I only eat a few different animals.

Arctos:She's like, so when there's always a fun new thing, like Duck, she's like, do I really need to add to the portfolio of things that need to die for me?

Gamemaster:Yes.

Arctos:She's like, no.

Arctos:I think it's a fair take.

Anzu:That's why she doesn't eat duck.

Arctos:Yeah, I get it.

Arctos:I get it.

Gamemaster:The animals are already being killed.

Gamemaster:You need to eat every kind of animal so that their lives didn't die in vain.

Gamemaster:It's the only solution.

Johnny:You need to honor.

Benny:Think about it.

Benny:You're the good guy.

Benny:If you don't eat more animals, this just means that bad people that don't care about the animals will eat them.

Benny:And it'll all be for naught.

Gamemaster:Exactly.

Arctos:Well, when I worked at Google and I had a manager that was Israeli, someone mentioned on the team, they're like, well, I don't like to eat meat because of animal suffering.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Arctos:So he was just like, but if we don't eat meat, those animals would never have been born, right?

Arctos:So she was like, well, yeah.

Arctos:So he's like, so you don't want animals to live?

Johnny:Wait, she had no argument for that logic?

Arctos:She was like, oh.

Gamemaster:That's crazy.

Arctos:This was off the cuff.

Arctos:He didn't get off the cuff.

Anzu:That's crazy.

Arctos:He was like, well, they're only alive because of us.

Arctos:So do you not want them to be alive?

Arctos:Which I was like, Jesus Christ.

Johnny:That's wild logic that she was like, I want them to live.

Johnny:And he was like, no, you don't.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you brought those animals into existence to be killed.

Arctos:Yeah, so, I mean, it was logically consistent.

Arctos:I'll tell, I'll give him that.

Johnny:Is it living, though, if the only purpose is to die?

Johnny:I feel like there's a difference between living and between forcing animals into the world just to fatten them up and kill them.

Arctos:Well, that's all life.

Arctos:All life.

Arctos:Y'all die.

Anzu:Thanks.

Gamemaster:I...

Arctos:Well, I will say, though, like when people I think conservationists, a lot of the biggest ones in history were hunters.

Benny:Well, okay.

Arctos:And I will say.

Arctos:hunting is the most humane way for, for a lot of those animals to die in the wild.

Arctos:Like most of them either just get too old and too sick and then like torn apart by predators.

Arctos:So like a swift bullet has that ad shows.

Johnny:No, I'm not against eating meat.

Johnny:I had beef tongue this weekend.

Johnny:It was pretty good.

Arctos:Yeah, it is.

Arctos:I love beef tongue, but yeah, you should watch that ad then.

Johnny:I'm against factory farming.

Johnny:Which is why all of my meat is killed by sharpshooter.

Benny:How about this?

Gamemaster:By that process, also you wouldn't want it to be a quick death because then it wouldn't know that it was being put out of its misery.

Benny:Counterpoint.

Arctos:It looked humane, to be fair, after you're ready for it.

Benny:Counterpoint.

Benny:Why be against factory farming if you care about the well-being of the animals?

Benny:Why do you want happy things to die?

Benny:Don't you want them to be put out of their misery?

Johnny:You're right.

Arctos:Well, did you watch the...

Anzu:Uh...

Gamemaster:It needs time to realize it's dying and be happy about it.

Benny:Yeah, so anesthesia and we explain the concept of death to them.

Johnny:I want my animals as bad as possible.

Gamemaster:The existential crisis makes the meat taste better.

Johnny:I want

Johnny:I want to see the video of my cows learning the concept of death and then understanding their own mortality.

Benny:Over here.

Arctos:In the... In the ad... If you watch the ad I sent you... In the ad I sent you, they're like, these animals never even know fear.

Benny:Over here.

Benny:Look at the board.

Gamemaster:I get it.

Benny:I know you have a lot of fentanyl in your system.

Benny:Look at the board.

Benny:So...

Gamemaster:Sorry, the anesthesia's fentanyl?

Benny:I mean, okay, morphine.

Benny:We want them to feel good.

Benny:This is Philosophy 101.

Benny:We have three hours before this kills you, so we gotta hurry up.

Arctos:They're just walking around...

Arctos:the grassy plains and then... I think you should have joined the military.

Johnny:No, I don't want that.

Johnny:I want them to know that they're going to die.

Gamemaster:Thank you.

Benny:We chase them on treadmills.

Benny:We make sure that they understand that we are to be feared and we exhaust them.

Benny:As soon as they fall off the treadmill, we dome them.

Benny:But other than that, we're just chasing behind them.

Benny:We force animals to watch TikTok reels that alternate between fun animal videos and executions so they can get the real experience of the highs and lows of emotion.

Benny:Because if they're happy all the time running in the fields, they don't know they're happy.

Benny:You have to show them some level of pain in order for them to understand happiness.

Arctos:Well, Bill Burr had an old bit, but it was a good one, talking about how, like, you know how some people reference, like, maybe we shouldn't eat pigs because they can count?

Arctos:He's just like, how high does an animal have to count for you to not eat it?

Arctos:Like, if a chicken counts to a thousand, are you going to give up chicken nuggets?

Arctos:What's your threshold?

Johnny:No, it's not a Vicky account.

Benny:No, that chicken.

Gamemaster:I'd give up that chicken specifically.

Benny:Yeah.

Benny:We'll just have a eugenics program and we'll make hyper-intelligent chickens because we've only killed the ones that can't count to a thousand.

Johnny:It's...

Benny:And then we raise the bar.

Benny:We raise the bar to 10,000 and slowly they develop.

Benny:They start understanding language and then they break out.

Benny:I'm going to write a book.

Arctos:I think this is what OpenAI is doing right now.

Johnny:Wait, two things.

Gamemaster:That's an animal farm.

Johnny:One, I think there's an episode about this.

Johnny:Two, it's not about how high the chicken can count.

Johnny:It's whether it has a concept of zero or not.

Gamemaster:Wait, so that means you would eat humans from like 10,000 years ago?

Anzu:No, probably not.

Benny:No, no, it's like... Do you understand nothing?

Arctos:I was going to say... Or just... Or just some parts of the world you'd go to.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Sounds humane.

Johnny:Only if they have a concept of fear.

Benny:No.

Arctos:Including New York City.

Arctos:You could find people who don't know what zero is.

Johnny:I feel as though Zoran Mamdami would not be happy with me for that.

Johnny:Personally?

Arctos:Well, he has already killed a lot of homeless people.

Gamemaster:It's true.

Arctos:I'm sorry.

Arctos:He got rid of the policy that you can arrest them if it's cold outside, so they just left some people outside and I think like 14 of them just froze to death on the first blizzard.

Johnny:Personally?

Anzu:Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Benny:Yeah.

Benny:Well, he wore gloves, so I don't know how personal it was, but... You said that?

Anzu:But what about when he made that joke about it being so cold that the rents have frozen?

Gamemaster:Good.

Anzu:Doesn't that kind of cancel it out?

Benny:That's so funny.

Arctos:I was at Comedy Cellar for my birthday and one of the comics was like, it's so cold, murder's down.

Arctos:People aren't committing crimes because it's so...

Benny:There was a shooting in the Upper West Side during the most recent blizzard that was the only crime on the Citizen app, and they're like, how mad do you have to be to pull up on your ops in a blizzard?

Anzu:it was wild out there indeed

Arctos:We covered a lot of philosophical ground today.

Johnny:Oh, the music's coming on.

Benny:Mm-hmm.

Gamemaster:Do we just want to call it a night then?

Gamemaster:With all that we discussed?

Johnny:I got some water buffalo I got to pick up, actually.

Benny:Oh.

Gamemaster:Exactly.

Gamemaster:I have 15 and a half goats I need to get for a dowry.

Johnny:Oh, crap.

Arctos:Congrats!

Anzu:The last thing I want to cover before we begin is about Song of Monsters.

Gamemaster:I don't have anyone to give it to.

Gamemaster:I just have to... Yep.

Johnny:Oh, yes.

Johnny:Guys, my book comes out at the end of the month.

Anzu:Let's go.

Arctos:Can we pre-order it?

Anzu:Wow.

Johnny:Be on the lookout for an email.

Johnny:Not yet.

Johnny:I'm finalizing the cover.

Johnny:I should have the final cover tomorrow.

Arctos:Can you just send a message in our chat when you're accepting pre-orders?

Johnny:Yeah, it'll probably be next couple of weeks.

Arctos:Okay.

Arctos:Send it.

Arctos:Don't try to hide this.

Arctos:I want to see it and I want to buy it.

Arctos:Wait, wait, are you doing an audiobook that you're reading?

Johnny:I am not reading the audio book because I don't trust myself enough and I'm not a professional.

Arctos:Can I just... It would be nice to listen to 20 hours of Noah talking.

Johnny:But there will be an audio book in a few months.

Johnny:Kindle has a weird thing.

Benny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I already have that if you wanna.

Anzu:True.

Johnny:Kindle and Amazon does a thing where your book has to be published before you can use Audible, like their whole service.

Johnny:So be on the lookout for the audio book.

Arctos:I see.

Johnny:But yes, thank you, Tanner.

Gamemaster:Alright.

Johnny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Bookshilling concluded.

Gamemaster:Now do we want to play some Pathfinder?

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Does anybody want to do a recap?

Gamemaster:Oh, Noah's hand is up.

Gamemaster:I think Noah wants to do a recap.

Johnny:Last time!

Johnny:We went to the museum.

Johnny:We, uh, got some art.

Johnny:We...

Johnny:We're like, wow, ARC's pretty cool.

Johnny:We had a very enlightening day.

Johnny:Arctos was like, I'm Sir Arctos.

Johnny:Can you just give me a tour for free?

Benny:Thank you.

Johnny:And Johnny popped along with that.

Johnny:Benny went on a school field trip.

Johnny:Just a normal nine-year-old child in armor with a falcata and a multi-tool.

Johnny:We... Oh, all my notes are on path builder and it's down right now.

Gamemaster:Oh no.

Johnny:We found another piece of art by that one guy who has a piece of art in Arctos' house.

Johnny:We learned that he just likes to travel and has seen a lot of crazy stuff.

Johnny:And I feel as though he's somehow very important to this plot.

Johnny:Can't say why, but I feel like he's important.

Arctos:He's Uriel.

Johnny:Oh, no, no, he's probably a Thessian.

Johnny:He's probably someone we've met.

Johnny:Then we were like, all right, we could do a lot of crazy shenanigans to try and get a piece of art.

Johnny:And Johnny was like, listen, guys, I feel like we could just steal the Heart from Arctos' house.

Johnny:Didn't phrase it that way.

Johnny:Gave Arctos a really beautiful speech about how he was the chosen one, which I don't really think penetrated Arctos' fuzzy head, but it kind of worked anyway.

Johnny:Yeah.

Johnny:And then we went back to Arctos' house.

Johnny:We did get the picture.

Johnny:It worked.

Johnny:Some very high rolls.

Johnny:We just walked in.

Johnny:Minister Vane was not there.

Benny:you you

Johnny:He's still in an emergency meeting.

Johnny:Probably not good.

Johnny:We got the Heart, and then we walked out.

Johnny:Easy peasy, lemon squeezy.

Johnny:Instead of difficult, difficult, lemon difficult.

Gamemaster:Mm-hmm.

Johnny:Then we got a message from our good pals, Anaïs and Anouk, and they were like, be there or be square.

Johnny:We're killing Spartle B. Jones in his illegal weed warehouse.

Johnny:5.30.

Johnny:And so we stopped by the Sin and Tonic to drop off this expensive piece of art.

Johnny:We're like, guys, somebody watch this very expensive piece of art.

Johnny:Illmari was still not back.

Johnny:Not sketchy at all.

Johnny:Who knows?

Johnny:Then we pulled up a few hours early.

Johnny:scouted out the building, had the world's longest fight in the darkness with Sbrtlby Jones and his hired henchmen.

Johnny:And I think that's still going on.

Johnny:I think the Sanford and Son music is still going on as Benny faces him around going, Ben-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Arctos:And the bones.

Arctos:You guys always forget the bones.

Gamemaster:And the Bones.

Gamemaster:It's Benny and the Bones, which is also a band.

Johnny:And he's in the bones.

Johnny:Benny in the bones.

Benny:any of the posts.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I think that's a pretty accurate retelling.

Gamemaster:Um...

Gamemaster:There was a bit in the middle there where you debated using cement to seal Elias in the storeroom with the painting, but you ultimately didn't do that.

Gamemaster:But you thought of it.

Gamemaster:I just want that, you know.

Arctos:Arctos is going to be really mad if that was the good call.

Gamemaster:Elias turns out to have been a triple agent this whole time.

Gamemaster:He steals it.

Gamemaster:Don't ask who he would be a triple agent for.

Arctos:How did we skip him being a double agent?

Gamemaster:Anyway.

Johnny:you

Arctos:Oh no, he's a double agent four.

Arctos:I'm onto you, Josh.

Gamemaster:That's fun.

Gamemaster:Anyway, yeah.

Gamemaster:You guys are coming off of what I know.

Gamemaster:Felt like, because in real life it was a very extended fight, but practice was in game like 36 seconds.

Gamemaster:Maybe out to a minute, depending on how long it takes Benny and the Bones to finally take out Sbrtlby.

Arctos:Thank you.

Gamemaster:But at the very least, once the darkness drops, you're definitely killing Sbrtlby.

Gamemaster:So a minute goes by, all of the henchmen lay bleeding out dead on the ground, and Sbrtlby finally is slain by a sword and some bones and some telekinetic projectiles and, like, a really aggressive Bonmo.

Gamemaster:And...

Gamemaster:Yeah, so we pick up today's session.

Johnny:you you

Gamemaster:You guys, if you need access to your stats and stuff, Foundry is up.

Gamemaster:If you're not already on it, you can look at your character sheet there.

Gamemaster:As you...

Gamemaster:take care of Sbrtlby, the sounds of explosions from different parts of this Grow operation being brought down with the very distinctive sputtering into explosion sound that you would be familiar with as an activated rocket hammer takes out important supports in other parts of this facility.

Gamemaster:What did you guys want to do?

Arctos:How big is Sbrtlby?

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Sbrtlby himself, I switched it over to the Heart thing.

Gamemaster:Let me switch back to the row house.

Arctos:Do you guys want to start growing some weed?

Arctos:Should we grab some?

Arctos:No.

Gamemaster:The place is actively crumbling down around you.

Arctos:Yeah, now I can take over this place.

Gamemaster:You can, yeah.

Arctos:We can grab some of it.

Gamemaster:Sbrtlby Jones is about four feet tall.

Gamemaster:And he looks, the image is true to life.

Gamemaster:He's like this long, gangly, red, mucus-covered, demon-looking thing.

Gamemaster:Who is dead now.

Arctos:Search his body.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Roll a perception check.

Gamemaster:If you'd like to search his body.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:And then there were also, they're not here because they got deleted because they're dead, but there were also pusks and meokdans, which I'll just put them here so you can remember what they look like.

Gamemaster:Because they're very pretty looking.

Johnny:I just kind of like started jogging around looking at what is this plant?

Johnny:What's happening here?

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:If you want to look at what the plant is, you can make a nature check.

Arctos:Anyone else want to look?

Arctos:We have two.

Benny:i'm searching the body by the way i dig it yeah

Anzu:Mike's doing the other body search.

Johnny:Nature.

Johnny:Yeah.

Johnny:Nature.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Arctos:Wow, two twos in a row.

Arctos:Oh, Mike did a good job, though.

Arctos:Mike didn't do Foundry.

Arctos:A lot of demons in here, too.

Anzu:I'll do the other nature search.

Johnny:lot of plants in here, a lot of greenery, a lot of foliage.

Anzu:I got a 20 for the plants.

Benny:A lot of demons.

Gamemaster:Okay, so what were the good rolls we got?

Gamemaster:20 from Anzu for the nature check.

Gamemaster:And then what did we get for the perception check?

Arctos:You don't have to worry about Arctos.

Gamemaster:Researching the bodies?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:22 for Benny.

Gamemaster:22.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:The nature check itself.

Gamemaster:One second.

Gamemaster:I don't remember what the name of this drug is.

Gamemaster:I think it's Shiver.

Johnny:Oh.

Gamemaster:It is.

Gamemaster:This plant is called shiver.

Gamemaster:It's processed into a smoked hallucinogen.

Gamemaster:It is technically...

Gamemaster:Not legal in parts of Calaria, but people get around that and they grow it anyway.

Gamemaster:The actual reason one would keep it in a clandestine grow operation like this is not necessarily because growing it is illegal, but because in order to grow it, you need to purchase...

Gamemaster:the right to grow the seeds from the company that owns it.

Arctos:Is it like an illegal drug the way weed and shrooms are?

Gamemaster:And you have a feeling that Sbrtlby here is not paying the requisite licensing fee.

Anzu:Okay.

Gamemaster:But, yes.

Johnny:um um

Arctos:Or is an illegal drug like fentanyl and heroin?

Gamemaster:It's an illegal drug the way closer to weed.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Okay, actually, sorry.

Gamemaster:Its effects are closer to like a hard drug, like an actual illegal drug.

Arctos:brooms acid acid okay or yeah yeah I know salvia is this something like coyote oh it's like okay

Gamemaster:Worse.

Gamemaster:Have you heard stories of like salvia?

Gamemaster:Like synthetics?

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:The whole... It gives you a really...

Gamemaster:pretty quick hallucinogenic high that wears off relatively fast.

Gamemaster:Um, mechanically, uh, when you take it for the first 10 minutes after you take it, you, you reduce the frightened condition by one whenever you would become frightened.

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:Uh, but then you become clumsy and fall asleep.

Gamemaster:Um, so like high risk, high reward there.

Gamemaster:Uh, but like,

Arctos:What type of people like, is it, but is it like, you know, like modern weed where there's a lot of like people that just do it to sleep?

Arctos:Or is it like we're giving people habits and they're going to go down a rabbit hole?

Benny:you

Gamemaster:It is most frequently used mixed in with tobacco in hookah bars as a recreational thing.

Arctos:All right.

Johnny:you

Arctos:Can we try to grab some seeds or can we, can we just cross, can we just take the plants and grow them ourselves?

Gamemaster:You can absolutely, with the 20 on the nature check, you can grab some.

Gamemaster:It will be difficult to get it to take and grow in your own, like wherever you're planning on growing it.

Gamemaster:But you can do that if you like.

Anzu:Arctos, do you think that growing drugs is something we need to get mixed up in?

Anzu:We're already pretty deep in a lot of other endeavors.

Benny:you

Arctos:I think it could go great as an income source.

Anzu:Right.

Johnny:Is there any already refined or already crushed up stuff in a baggie sitting around anywhere?

Arctos:And we'll market it to high-income people, just, you know, as like a sleep aid.

Gamemaster:Uh, not in the room that you're currently in, perhaps further in the, perhaps like elsewhere in the facility, but where you are right now is specifically the hydroponics bay.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Anzu:So this place is not going to be standing much longer.

Gamemaster:No, no.

Arctos:No.

Gamemaster:You can see on the walls, especially the wall coming from the direction where Sbrtlby ran out of, there are cracks actively climbing up the side of the wall, as it seems some important structural elements have been removed elsewhere in the facility.

Arctos:So we should just grab this and leave.

Arctos:Yeah.

Anzu:Can I gauge how much time before there's a critical collapse?

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Let's do an Arcana check.

Johnny:You.

Arctos:Is there any way I could use... Can I aid him, and here's how.

Anzu:Arcana, okay.

Benny:you

Anzu:Ooh, I could use it for sure.

Gamemaster:that's you know what like that's a

Arctos:I would like to cast Approximate, and approximate the cracks, and then go, there's 40 right on that pillar!

Arctos:There isn't that many uses for this.

Gamemaster:Gross misuse of that spell in that it can't do anything like what you'd like it to do.

Gamemaster:But when are you going to use Approximate anyway?

Gamemaster:So, sure.

Johnny:So.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Arctos:Thank you.

Gamemaster:I think I will give it to you.

Gamemaster:If you're using Approximate in this situation, that just counts as a critical success.

Arctos:Thank you.

Arctos:You're a guy.

Anzu:All right, well, I got a 17 before the approximate, so... Not very high.

Gamemaster:Um, okay, so, uh, I think that's plus two.

Gamemaster:So, 19.

Gamemaster:Um, no, I... Yeah, oh, I guess I could admit... What's your crafting modifier?

Johnny:um

Arctos:If it's a level D seed.

Anzu:Lower.

Gamemaster:Is it better?

Gamemaster:Lower?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Because I was going to say you could justify doing crafting here as well.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I think, unfortunately, like, architecture is not your strong suit.

Gamemaster:You do not have one of the backgrounds that gives you, like, masonry lore, which are weirdly common.

Anzu:Because what I really want to do is run through this building real fast, see if there's an office area, and see if Sbrtlby knew about the Heart thing, and if he's acquired any paintings.

Gamemaster:So, you know, anywhere from one minute to, like, an hour.

Benny:you you

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Anzu:I'm trying to find an office.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Then if you want to start running through and looking for an office, you can do that.

Gamemaster:That would be another perception check.

Gamemaster:Looking for stuff.

Arctos:Think we have time?

Gamemaster:Oh.

Arctos:Well, if we have a minute before we jump out a window.

Gamemaster:Before we go into that, I did... It's also possible to... Unfortunately with that rule, you don't have a good grasp on...

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:How long it'll take.

Gamemaster:Also, you were searching the bodies and stuff.

Gamemaster:What did Benny get?

Gamemaster:22?

Benny:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:So, searching the body.

Gamemaster:He has that spear on him.

Johnny:regular spear this spear is damaged

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, I believe that's just a regular spear.

Benny:Course.

Gamemaster:But...

Gamemaster:You know, it's there if you want it.

Gamemaster:Actually, one second.

Gamemaster:What is up with the spear?

Gamemaster:The spear does an additional 1d6 spirit damage, but it doesn't tell me why it does that.

Gamemaster:So I have a feeling that's a spartal bee effect and not a spear effect.

Gamemaster:Beyond that, on his person with that roll, you would find there is a...

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:There's like a key ring, and on the key ring there are four triangular pieces of yellow paper.

Gamemaster:You wouldn't know what they do just off the... You're going to have to attempt to identify them.

Gamemaster:And then you'd also find...

Gamemaster:three small filters, like vials, of a really gross, like, piss-yellow-looking liquid.

Arctos:Peace.

Gamemaster:It's a little bit viscous, where, like, if you tilt the bottle and tilt it back, a bunch of it clings to the side of the wall where it was before it slides down.

Johnny:This guy doesn't...

Gamemaster:It's unpleasant-looking.

Benny:it's honey it's corn syrup

Gamemaster:And then...

Gamemaster:It might be honey.

Gamemaster:It's maybe a little less viscous than honey.

Arctos:Do you think... Guys, do you think we have a minute?

Anzu:Bye.

Gamemaster:Could be corn syrup.

Arctos:Sorry, go ahead.

Gamemaster:The only other thing you find... Sorry, there's one more thing on his body.

Arctos:Oh.

Gamemaster:It's gross and slimy, and the 22 just barely catches it, because it is the same color as his skin.

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:There is a...

Gamemaster:Red choker that's just like a band of elastic wrapped around his neck.

Arctos:Take it off.

Arctos:Grab it.

Benny:I take it off.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Did Anzu tell me?

Arctos:Do you think we have a minute, Anzu?

Anzu:at least a minute, but maybe not much more.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:I put all my stuff on my back, and I activate Godspeed.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Okay.

Arctos:So that bumps up my speed from 30 to...

Gamemaster:40.

Arctos:It should be 40.

Arctos:Yep.

Arctos:That's a status bonus.

Arctos:I can also wild stride, which two actions lets me also, it's a circumstance, the other one's status, so they stack.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:oh

Arctos:So I get another 20 foot for those.

Benny:you

Arctos:So for those two actions, I'm rocking 50 feet each, 100 feet for those two actions.

Arctos:And then I'm hasted.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:So I have two other movement actions at 40 a pop.

Arctos:So I get 180 feet every six seconds.

Arctos:And I'm zooming.

Arctos:On all fours, I'm zooming around.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:That's crazy.

Arctos:And I'm running around looking for paintings.

Gamemaster:Okay, so...

Arctos:And once I think around 30 seconds have passed, I will either turn back or jump out the window.

Gamemaster:Okay, Arctos the bear, running on all fours at, and I just calculated it, 20 miles an hour.

Arctos:In armor, he's heavy, so it's actually pretty impressive.

Johnny:Wow.

Gamemaster:In armor, shoots into the other part of the facility to try and find some art.

Benny:you you

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Roll a perception check as you're doing this.

Arctos:All right.

Johnny:You're doing an Arctos.

Arctos:Roll in our main chat.

Arctos:So it's a...

Arctos:16.

Gamemaster:16.

Gamemaster:Okay, so as you run through the rest of the facility, going back the direction that Spardleby and co.

Benny:you

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:emerged from originally, I think the first thing you note in your supersonic run is that this part of the building is by far the least damaged.

Gamemaster:As you're running through, you have to...

Gamemaster:You go through the hallway, there are already parts that have fully caved in, blocking off parts of the facility off to you.

Gamemaster:And with that roll running through, you can see what looked to be, maybe they were bunks of some kind, like that might have been where the rest of those henchmen lived.

Arctos:All right, so I guess I'll just run out.

Gamemaster:But you don't see anything that looks like an office or a storage room or anything like that.

Gamemaster:Really just like a bunch of holes forming in the wall and cracks forming.

Gamemaster:But no paintings or anything of that nature.

Benny:Really?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You can super speed your way fully out of the facility if you like.

Arctos:Zoom, zoom.

Gamemaster:Was there anything else you guys would like to do as the building continues to crumble?

Gamemaster:It's been like 40 seconds at this point.

Gamemaster:You haven't arced us time to run in and out.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You can absolutely just exit.

Gamemaster:You all exit the facility, end up in the parking lot outside.

Gamemaster:And it wasn't quite a minute.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:It takes like four or five minutes for the rest of the building to collapse in on itself.

Gamemaster:Interestingly enough, however they manage to take out structural supports, the building fully collapses inward.

Gamemaster:It doesn't damage any of the buildings in the surrounding area.

Arctos:Very classy.

Gamemaster:Just, yeah, just fully implosion.

Gamemaster:But no exterior damage.

Gamemaster:What would you guys do once you exit?

Gamemaster:Like, what is the immediate next step?

Arctos:We get in our car and just leave.

Johnny:Get over to the car.

Gamemaster:Okay, sure.

Johnny:Are Anaïs and a knock around?

Gamemaster:If you wanted to go looking for an iononic, you can.

Gamemaster:That would be a perception check to try and find them.

Johnny:Go ahead.

Arctos:I'll try it.

Arctos:I'll try another.

Arctos:25 as I'm zooming.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:I'm just going to start firing off messages randomly in a bunch of directions.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Be like...

Johnny:Anaïs and a knock.

Johnny:Come in.

Johnny:Anaïs and a knock.

Johnny:This is Johnny Skyfall and the Poncho Boys.

Johnny:I'm just going to keep firing that off until it hits.

Benny:Ah

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Okay, for the...

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:For the record, message, you need to be able to see the person.

Gamemaster:So you can't just fire off in random directions.

Johnny:Yep.

Gamemaster:You need to point at somebody specific and target them.

Johnny:Brrr.

Gamemaster:25 is more than enough.

Gamemaster:This was not a particularly hard check.

Gamemaster:You leave out through the parking lot, and then you, like, speed towards the front of the building, presumably where Anouk and Anaïs entered, and amidst the rubble...

Gamemaster:There are collapsed beams and bits of the original building that have fallen down next to two recognizable red-haired twins just kind of sat in a ring with a perfect dome carved around them where it looks like none of the rubble or the dust landed, as if to intimate that they were in some kind of protective sphere when the thing came down on them.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:Um, but they, uh, they see super speedy bear, just, god, a 20 mile an hour bear in full armor is terrifying.

Arctos:5e shit.

Arctos:Yeah, it's a bear of War.

Gamemaster:Um, this War bear, as you speed by, um, and I, the, uh, the guy will, like, wave over you.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:hmm

Gamemaster:um did you did you get the little uh demon man uh because uh this is good we were um we were cleaning up the uh the rest of the what did the henchmen

Arctos:He's gone.

Benny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:that they called them.

Gamemaster:And you would see at this point that there are, amidst the rubble of this area, they had their own fight with a series of henchmen that it appears Sbrtlby used as meat shields to prevent them from chasing him down.

Arctos:Would you want to read?

Gamemaster:So...

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, our ride is, in fact, out of commission, and they gesture over, and you see that whatever vehicle they acquired for this fully was rammed into the side of the building at one point as part of their entrance.

Johnny:These guys are the craziest people.

Gamemaster:If you have room in your vehicle for the two of us, we would appreciate it.

Arctos:Yeah, I got a backseat.

Benny:Okay.

Gamemaster:Excellent.

Arctos:There's Ro.

Gamemaster:Anaïs is very aware that you have a vaccine in your car.

Anzu:You made pretty quick work of finding these guys.

Gamemaster:But it's news for Anouk.

Gamemaster:It was actually pretty easy for this man.

Gamemaster:He was selling contraband under his full name.

Gamemaster:which made it relatively easy to find him.

Johnny:The Sbrtlby Jones illegal drug operation.

Anzu:All right.

Johnny:Listen, I don't think anyone deserves to die, but this guy kind of had it coming.

Arctos:He's a demon, not a devil, right?

Gamemaster:This is very close.

Gamemaster:This building is registered under Spotlby Jones Agriculture.

Gamemaster:It is... Roll an occultism or a religion check to know if you can differentiate here.

Benny:Thank you.

Anzu:All right.

Anzu:Well, there you go.

Arctos:Or... I'll roll it.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Oh, I imagine he's not even really dead anyway.

Gamemaster:So this was just, you know, to get him out of the way long enough for us to get the keystone and such.

Arctos:Oh, yeah, you got to go to hell or something, right?

Johnny:Oh.

Gamemaster:What did you get on your religion and or arcana check?

Arctos:Sorry, what?

Arctos:Can I add?

Arctos:Oh, no, that's not.

Gamemaster:This isn't related directly to the host, so I don't think you'd get the exhort the faithful bonus here.

Arctos:Never mind.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah, 24.

Gamemaster:Oh, 24 is definitely good enough.

Gamemaster:This... He looked like he would have been a devil.

Gamemaster:Sorry, a demon.

Arctos:What's the difference between them again?

Gamemaster:Like...

Gamemaster:Demons and devils come from different locations.

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:They're, like, different species of fiend.

Gamemaster:And, like, alignment isn't so much a thing, but, like, in the general lore, the demons are chaotic versus the devils lawful.

Gamemaster:What that actually ends up...

Gamemaster:breaking into is the devil's... What is known, and not a lot is known about devil hierarchy and the like, is that wherever the devils come from,

Gamemaster:which colloquially is referred to as hell because nobody's actually been there and to come back, is one Joker world somewhere where all of the devils live under the rule of like a very hierarchical society compared to the demons in their own Joker world somewhere have hundreds of different kinds of demons all warring with each other

Arctos:Fascist versus anarchist.

Gamemaster:For supremacy.

Gamemaster:Over the others.

Gamemaster:So it's.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:That's like a reasonable approximation there.

Arctos:Is in that one shot we did, were those devils or demons?

Gamemaster:That was.

Gamemaster:Like a question.

Gamemaster:Left by the one shot.

Gamemaster:They were definitely fiends.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:But it was unclear.

Arctos:And then when we did the... When we found out there was some fiendish presence in one of the satellites, did we know if that was devil or fiend?

Gamemaster:one of the satellites.

Arctos:I thought there was a... When we were investigating a satellite, Benny sent something and we're like, oh, it might be demon-related.

Arctos:That was a question.

Benny:yeah that was like the very high perception check when it was disconnected that there was like a presence that was looking oh this was the one that was on top of the uh the friendlies family diner this is josh right yeah same josh this maybe we can send a message

Johnny:Oh yeah.

Arctos:Josh, cut it out for me.

Johnny:We lost him.

Arctos:Well, his computer's music's also cutting out too, so.

Benny:Yeah.

Johnny:Hmm.

Benny:It was very concerning because I was explaining it and Josh rose on a confused face and I was like, am I not making any fucking sense here?

Anzu:oh such a brief victory

Arctos:Yeah, for a second there.

Benny:And then I looked at everyone else who was moving and I was like, oh, okay.

Gamemaster:Can you guys hear me now?

Arctos:Not anymore.

Benny:Yeah.

Benny:Well.

Benny:Yeah, we can't anymore.

Benny:The good part is we have a continuous heartbeat, so when the music goes bad, we can't hear you.

Johnny:Okay.

Benny:I don't know if you can even hear us.

Johnny:Yeah.

Benny:This could all be for naught.

Arctos:While he's sorting that out on...

Arctos:What's our plan?

Arctos:Are we going to go to... I say we just go to the Heart dealer.

Arctos:Hey, take these paintings.

Johnny:We got this painting.

Anzu:the Heart dealer being the guy with the heart.

Johnny:I got it.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:Do we want to, is everyone looking uninjured?

Johnny:Do we want to rest up a little bit or are we ready to just go?

Anzu:I mean, I could use maybe a brief to treat wounds, but...

Arctos:We could go in the morning, too.

Arctos:We don't have to go tonight.

Johnny:I'm just worried we're going to walk in there and be like, now that you've given me the Heart, you'll have to fight my army, and then you can get the stone.

Arctos:Yeah, let's go in the morning.

Benny:Yes.

Arctos:Yeah, let's go in the morning.

Anzu:Oh, I've lost connection to Foundry.

Gamemaster:Can you guys hear me?

Anzu:Oh!

Arctos:Yeah, now we can.

Johnny:Yes.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:Although I'm sure for how long.

Gamemaster:So... Yeah, we'll see.

Gamemaster:I think, if you recall last week, I was complaining of ghosts.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I think the server just started ghosts.

Gamemaster:So I turned off the server, and now you can hear me.

Gamemaster:I will turn it back on, and then hopefully that does it.

Arctos:All right.

Gamemaster:I'm going to turn the music back on and see if that...

Arctos:Is it ghosts or is it retaliation for you, DDoSingPathBuilder?

Gamemaster:That's probably it.

Anzu:Mmm.

Gamemaster:You're right.

Gamemaster:You got me.

Arctos:You're in a blood feud.

Johnny:That's a dangerous blood for you.

Gamemaster:I'm getting D-Dust back.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:You can't DDoS me, I DDoS you.

Benny:How do you know this would work?

Gamemaster:Well...

Gamemaster:I am turning my server back on once it's back up.

Gamemaster:We can go back into Foundry.

Gamemaster:So, unfortunately, for a half second, you guys will just have to remember your stats.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:Oh, well, I don't know if it'll roll.

Anzu:Oh no!

Arctos:Well, I didn't refresh, so I can still see all my stats.

Arctos:Yeah, I'll just roll on myself.

Gamemaster:You can try it, but...

Arctos:No, no, I don't want to try that.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you can't roll in the Dicebot because the Dicebot is hosted on the same server as Foundry.

Gamemaster:But, you know, that's totally doable.

Arctos:Yeah, I'll roll on Google.

Johnny:Oh, good.

Benny:Well, it'd build me a dice bot with a backdoor.

Arctos:If you want, I can create my own dice bot.

Arctos:It's just you don't have to worry about the code.

Arctos:Don't worry about the code.

Arctos:It might be a lot of 20s, though.

Gamemaster:Well, that makes me suspicious.

Gamemaster:I wasn't suspicious until you told me.

Arctos:Oh no, I got kicked off Foundry.

Gamemaster:Okay, Foundry is back up.

Arctos:I think kicking me off was actually because it came online and it said you're not authorized.

Gamemaster:Is the Dicebot back up?

Arctos:Game is paused.

Gamemaster:And the Dicebot is back up.

Gamemaster:The game is not paused.

Gamemaster:You take that back.

Arctos:You're right, it's not.

Johnny:Hmm.

Gamemaster:I've never figured out what that feature is for.

Gamemaster:Except for, like, if you guys are just playing around with your characters and having them run around, and then I can just stop that from happening.

Gamemaster:But I don't know why they would need to implement a pause feature specifically for that.

Arctos:Is there environment tick damage that could happen?

Gamemaster:No!

Gamemaster:Why would there be tick damage in a turn-based game?

Gamemaster:How would it... Um...

Arctos:Every six seconds?

Benny:It'd be like once around, like once around, you just take some damage.

Arctos:It's Foundry Live Combat.

Gamemaster:Once around you can do that, that's fine.

Gamemaster:But I'm the one that advances the round, so I don't need to pause.

Arctos:What if you only actually gave us all six seconds?

Arctos:Like, not six seconds each.

Gamemaster:Mm-hmm.

Arctos:We all had to just scream at what we're going to do in the six seconds.

Gamemaster:It's... It's in real time.

Gamemaster:The whole time.

Benny:It gets your turn to what is concealed me.

Benny:That's it.

Benny:You skip your turn next.

Benny:Ranting typing.

Gamemaster:See, the thing is, you guys would have the advantage in that scenario.

Gamemaster:Because I would have to yell out eight actions every six seconds.

Gamemaster:Well, you only need to remember your one.

Gamemaster:It's fine.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Where were we?

Gamemaster:Oh, right.

Gamemaster:You were helping Anouk and Anaïs into your vehicle to try on home and see that Elias stole your paintings.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:mhm

Gamemaster:Um, so, so yeah, um, your, your, oh, right.

Johnny:Oh no, wait.

Gamemaster:Uh, they were demons.

Gamemaster:We spoke about the demons.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Where were we going with that?

Arctos:Do I know how they come back?

Gamemaster:Um, okay.

Gamemaster:So yeah, from your role, you got a good role, right?

Gamemaster:Yeah, you got a 24.

Gamemaster:Um, you would know that, um, demons and devils and most other extra planar, like more powerful entities of that Scale.

Gamemaster:If they die, of that range in power, when they die, will return to somewhere on their originating world to regenerate.

Arctos:Scale.

Gamemaster:The process to regenerate can take some months, so you're not exactly worried about Sparta will be just popping up again tomorrow.

Gamemaster:And the henchmen were weak enough that you imagine that they just fully died.

Gamemaster:But Sparrowbee was a high enough level that he is likely, his soul is regenerating somewhere in the Joker world where demons originate from.

Gamemaster:And he may find his way back here at some point in the future.

Gamemaster:If you wanted to kill him outright, you have to go to wherever the demons come from.

Johnny:We're going to be in the middle of a very important scene, and then all of a sudden it'll just go dark.

Johnny:Like, what's happening?

Johnny:He'll be like, it's Sbrtlby Jones, here for revenge of Sbrtlby Jones agriculture.

Benny:My God, that's Sbrtlby Jones music.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Arctos:All right, let's head home.

Gamemaster:The six of you, seven of you, if you count Othello, head home to the Sin and Tonic.

Gamemaster:Like, uneventful drive.

Gamemaster:You don't need directions or anything like that.

Gamemaster:You make it back... God, I don't remember what time it is.

Gamemaster:Does anybody remember what time we left off?

Arctos:I think it was six.

Arctos:Was it six?

Gamemaster:Yeah, it's something like that.

Anzu:This was in the evening.

Gamemaster:Yeah, so we can just say it's 8.

Gamemaster:I don't know if that's actually relevant, but it's, you know, mid-evening at this point.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:Before you pull back in.

Gamemaster:Anouk and Anaïs, as you come back to the tonic, will pop out and...

Gamemaster:Start heading back over to their workshop because they need to rebuild their cache of rocket hammers now that they've spent it on this.

Arctos:Hey, can you also build us a radio that can send a frequency to a certain frequency?

Arctos:And I just hand them the sticky note or the paper I have that we talked to the last art.

Johnny:Okay.

Gamemaster:Like a ham radio?

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Or a walkie-talkie?

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:This is easy.

Gamemaster:It will be like three silver pieces until you want me to pop down to a local electronics store.

Arctos:I look at my business manager.

Anzu:Yes, I can handle it.

Gamemaster:OK.

Arctos:I don't really deal with the money, you know.

Gamemaster:I do not care where the... OK.

Gamemaster:One of you give me three silver pieces, and then I can tune a radio to this particular frequency.

Anzu:Yes, yes, very good.

Benny:Benny, I'll hand it over.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:Three silver?

Gamemaster:Three silver.

Johnny:We want to investigate those things we pulled off, Sbrtlby and his place.

Gamemaster:It's not particularly expensive.

Benny:Okay.

Benny:It is recorded.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:All right.

Gamemaster:You're back at the Sin and Tonic.

Gamemaster:Anything you'd like to do while you're here?

Arctos:Go check out the paintings.

Johnny:And I'll just check on the panel.

Anzu:Yes, first we check to make sure the painting is still here.

Benny:Sure.

Arctos:Yes.

Arctos:Paintings.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Anzu:Right.

Gamemaster:You head over to the storeroom.

Gamemaster:You open up the door.

Johnny:Oh.

Gamemaster:Elias is still there, and so are your paintings.

Gamemaster:Plural.

Arctos:I checked to see if they're in the bags.

Gamemaster:They are still in the bags.

Gamemaster:As best you can tell, they are untouched.

Arctos:Okay, okay.

Gamemaster:No roll necessary.

Arctos:Great.

Arctos:I can take him.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:We should all sleep in the same room tonight.

Arctos:In case we're sieged.

Gamemaster:Elias is me?

Arctos:Oh, you can stay here.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:Oh, okay.

Gamemaster:That's good.

Arctos:Unless you want to do a sleepover.

Gamemaster:I didn't want to sleep in the same room.

Gamemaster:No.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:You look like you don't iron your sheets.

Arctos:I don't have sheets.

Arctos:I have a fur bed.

Gamemaster:That's even worse.

Johnny:Bearable.

Gamemaster:Do you iron the fur?

Gamemaster:Okay, so... So, yes?

Arctos:And they get cleaned for me via steam.

Arctos:Yes to what?

Gamemaster:You iron the fur.

Arctos:No, no, no.

Arctos:I don't iron it.

Arctos:Someone steams it for me.

Gamemaster:I don't know how to take that.

Benny:yeah yeah

Gamemaster:I'm going to sleep somewhere else.

Anzu:Yeah, you just do your own thing, for sure.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:Yep.

Gamemaster:I was going to do that.

Gamemaster:Thank you.

Anzu:Thanks for keeping Anaïs on these.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:Can I get back to polishing the weapons now?

Anzu:Of course.

Johnny:Thank you.

Arctos:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:And then he just turns around.

Gamemaster:He's done with the conversation now.

Anzu:Alright, I'll sit down at a booth.

Benny:Benny will hand over the choker, the four triangular pieces of paper on a key ring, and the three small vials of high fructose corn syrup.

Anzu:and say, all right, what do I need to look at here?

Gamemaster:What do you want to identify first?

Johnny:I will aid him.

Anzu:Ah, the choker.

Benny:you you

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:This would be an Arcana check.

Anzu:Indeed.

Anzu:Ah, jeez.

Anzu:Please critically succeed on your AIDS so that I can get a 22.

Johnny:Is a 31 a critical success?

Gamemaster:31 is just barely not a critical success, unfortunately.

Gamemaster:21 is just barely not a success.

Anzu:Oh no, so then I'm only going to get a 21, which is probably just barely not a success.

Anzu:Bollocks.

Anzu:Frick.

Anzu:I don't know if I could do anything about that.

Anzu:Okay.

Gamemaster:You fail to identify the magic and can't try again for one day.

Arctos:We can just try again tomorrow.

Johnny:Well.

Benny:Or you can put it on.

Gamemaster:Or you could put it on.

Anzu:And I'll be learnt?

Gamemaster:If you put it on, you'll learn what it does.

Benny:At least partially.

Anzu:Um... Alright, I guess I'll just put it on.

Arctos:Wait, wait, wait.

Arctos:If it's cursed, we won't know.

Benny:He's not going to roll that high anyways.

Arctos:No!

Arctos:How have you guys not died?

Johnny:We have.

Anzu:Alright.

Arctos:You're right.

Anzu:Alright, I'm not gonna put it on yet.

Benny:First off, yeah.

Anzu:I'm gonna look at the other stuff first.

Arctos:That's why.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Watch your mouth.

Anzu:Uh...

Benny:Benny and Johnny are like, wait a second.

Anzu:There's the papers on a ring.

Gamemaster:Correct.

Gamemaster:There are four pieces of yellow triangular paper on a ring.

Anzu:What can I do about that?

Gamemaster:Occultism or religion?

Anzu:All right.

Anzu:We love occultism.

Johnny:I'm aiding again.

Johnny:Oh, I feel like I don't need to aid this.

Anzu:Oh, big number.

Anzu:33.

Gamemaster:Or 34.

Johnny:34.

Anzu:Well.

Gamemaster:These are Fulus of Concealment.

Gamemaster:You place each of the four pieces of paper in a cardinal direction along a 10-foot radius circle.

Gamemaster:And everybody who's within the circle, when you activate the Fulus, gain the effect of Invisibility Sphere for...

Gamemaster:one kind of creature of your choice of animal, beast, celestial, fey, fiend, humanoid, monitor, plant, or undead.

Anzu:Hmm.

Arctos:Wait, sorry, so what does that do?

Gamemaster:You become invisible to one kind of creature.

Gamemaster:Hold on a second.

Arctos:Fae?

Arctos:Sorry, the types were Fae... Are humans animals?

Johnny:Does it last?

Gamemaster:These are the types.

Benny:Humanoid.

Johnny:Does it only last 10 minutes or does it last for as long?

Gamemaster:That lasts an hour.

Johnny:Okay.

Johnny:Oh, yeah, there it is.

Johnny:Oh, wow.

Arctos:And the circle can't move, right?

Johnny:But like only in the circle, right?

Gamemaster:Only within the circle, correct.

Gamemaster:It's an invisibility sphere that lasts for an hour and only applies to one kind of creature.

Johnny:Okay.

Arctos:It's fixed.

Gamemaster:Correct.

Gamemaster:You're effectively, you're choosing a 10-foot radius circle that while you're within it, you are invisible to one kind of creature for the next hour.

Johnny:That's pretty cool.

Benny:I don't like that.

Arctos:Are Nephilums and things like that, because there's no Asemars or Tieflings, there's just Nephilums, right?

Gamemaster:Uh, correct.

Arctos:Do they count as humanoids or... Does Arctos count as a humanoid or a beast?

Gamemaster:Uh, Nephilim are humanoids.

Johnny:you you

Gamemaster:I am... What's that?

Arctos:Or animal?

Arctos:Oh, he's an awoken animal.

Gamemaster:He's an awoken animal.

Gamemaster:Let me see.

Gamemaster:What is the ancestry?

Gamemaster:Awakened animal is a beast.

Gamemaster:You're a beast.

Gamemaster:But also, that's if somebody's trying to stay hidden from you.

Johnny:Yeah.

Arctos:I know.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:It was a good check.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:Because if we were all humanoid, there could have been stuff that we didn't see in there.

Gamemaster:I mean, for what it's worth, you would know that a Fulu is a consumable, so this ring hasn't been used.

Gamemaster:It's possible he had others that were being used, but this particular ring of paper has not been consumed yet.

Benny:So it's a ring of paper, and it's all four have to get used at the same time?

Johnny:Cool.

Gamemaster:So you have... Correct.

Gamemaster:This is a single-use invisibility sphere, effectively.

Benny:I see.

Benny:OK.

Anzu:Alright, on to the potions.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Can I get either an Arcana or a Medicine check, please?

Anzu:We go Arcana.

Anzu:Oh my gosh, my rolls have been not very good today.

Anzu:Except for that last one.

Anzu:I got a 16, perhaps a 17, but...

Johnny:try again in the morning that was a long day

Gamemaster:Just from smelling it, it's probably not corn syrup.

Gamemaster:That's unfortunately all you can get.

Gamemaster:Put the choker on.

Anzu:Guys, I'll have to take a look at these tomorrow.

Anzu:It's just not coming to me right now.

Anzu:Yeah, I got hit by a couple telekinetic projectiles, which I'm not used to doing.

Anzu:Usually they're going the other direction.

Anzu:So I'm just feeling.

Arctos:Let me take a look.

Benny:Did you put the choker on?

Anzu:I haven't put the choker on.

Anzu:I think we'll check it in the morning.

Anzu:And if that doesn't work, then perhaps I'll put it on.

Arctos:So what are the healths of you guys?

Benny:It looked good on you.

Anzu:I'm down 17 hit points.

Arctos:OK.

Johnny:but I'm apparently undamaged.

Benny:Let me log in.

Benny:It would have just stayed open, but it didn't.

Benny:I am down 11 hit points.

Arctos:I'm just going to do... I'm just going to cast two healing spells.

Arctos:Well, I only need one, right?

Arctos:No one had more than 19 gone.

Anzu:If that's applying to both of us.

Benny:Every able bodied.

Arctos:Arctos.

Arctos:And everyone in the bar.

Gamemaster:And Sbrtlby Jones?

Arctos:No, everyone in the bar.

Arctos:It's probably not in the bar.

Anzu:Right.

Gamemaster:Do you know that, for sure?

Johnny:um

Arctos:We didn't take him.

Arctos:And if there's any patrons, they get a nice little wave of healing energy.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:You give them a nice little wave of healing energy, and one person...

Arctos:By the grace of the host.

Arctos:And the just sort of roar bursts out.

Gamemaster:One person very visibly sobers up, having been like four drinks in, just fully shit.

Benny:Hey, man, what the fuck?

Gamemaster:And then immediately goes and starts downing one of the beers at his table.

Johnny:Guys on a mission.

Arctos:We do that stuff tomorrow.

Gamemaster:Okay, anything else?

Johnny:Yeah, tomorrow morning we go... Wait.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:So what are we going to do with the remainder?

Gamemaster:You've got so many hours left in the day.

Anzu:I'm spent.

Anzu:I'm going to bed.

Gamemaster:What are you doing?

Arctos:I don't know.

Arctos:Does anyone want to go for a jog?

Johnny:Okay.

Johnny:Yeah, sure, I'll go for a jog with you.

Johnny:Tomorrow, our plan, are we saying, hey, it's us, we have the Heart, or are we just going to be straight up and say, hey, we have art, we have the quinn, we want to trade it for the... Is it a sphere?

Arctos:Cool.

Johnny:It's a sphere we're trying to get?

Anzu:A keystone?

Benny:Peace out.

Gamemaster:The keystone, which, if you recall, looks to be an ornate golden box, the interior of which is an eight-sided floating blue crystal.

Johnny:Keystone?

Gamemaster:It looks a little bit like, you know the Sims?

Arctos:We could say we'd like to trade with your heart we have and then we'll name the Quinn and then we say we have three other lesser paintings.

Gamemaster:You know the, like, thing above the head in the Sims?

Johnny:Should we just be straight up and say we're here for the keystone, we have art, we'd like to trade?

Gamemaster:It looks like one of those.

Benny:Sure, although I'm not sure they'll know the Keystone is, but maybe they will.

Johnny:All right.

Gamemaster:Two other lesser paintings.

Benny:I like it.

Arctos:two other Lesser paintings.

Gamemaster:I'm looking at this and I now see that it is probably ten-sided.

Gamemaster:No, twelve-sided.

Gamemaster:It's twelve-sided.

Gamemaster:I can count.

Gamemaster:Okay, so some of you go on a jog and then you all hit the hay.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:Why?

Anzu:Mm.

Arctos:I hit the fur, but Ark just puts on his jogging suit and then runs.

Gamemaster:That's so dumb.

Benny:Thank you.

Johnny:Why do you have...

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:You guys aren't using AI to its full capabilities.

Gamemaster:I'm just imagining a polar bear having to commission a polar bear-sized set of sweatpants and a sweater.

Gamemaster:Like...

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:No, no, no, no.

Gamemaster:Because that was not purchased off the rack.

Arctos:This is why he would never betray Minister Vane.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:He takes good care of him.

Gamemaster:Yeah, so you go out on your sweats, get a jog in, hit the fur.

Gamemaster:And you get the benefits of a rest.

Arctos:Yay.

Gamemaster:You wake up on the morn.

Johnny:All right.

Gamemaster:This is like the first time, you know, it's not often you guys get to go to sleep at a normal time and wake up at a normal time, but you got to do both of those things.

Benny:the morn.

Arctos:Oh.

Gamemaster:So you are up in time for Ginny's world-famous Very Drags.

Johnny:Hey, Jenny.

Gamemaster:What's the dealio?

Arctos:Arctos eats his eggs with his side of food, the salmon he gets from the estate.

Johnny:Jenny, I don't want to.

Johnny:Ginny, I don't want to tell you how to do your job, but I think if you cooked these for about four minutes less, you might find something magical there.

Gamemaster:But if I don't cook it long enough, it's still all wet.

Johnny:I think people might like that.

Johnny:You'll be surprised.

Gamemaster:No, I'm pretty sure people want their drinks to be wet and their foods to be not wet.

Gamemaster:Otherwise, why would you have a distinction between the two?

Johnny:What about stew?

Gamemaster:What's a stew?

Anzu:We'll work on that.

Johnny:I will.

Johnny:We'll come back to this one.

Johnny:I'll get you a cookbook.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:If you can figure out how to cook what a stew is on my griddle, then I'm happy to do it.

Arctos:We just need to get a pan to put on the griddle.

Arctos:That's what they do.

Arctos:Or a pot.

Arctos:That's what the French do.

Gamemaster:That doesn't sound right.

Arctos:It's just canonical.

Gamemaster:What is a French?

Anzu:We?

Arctos:They're canonically in Pathfinder.

Johnny:They are canonical.

Gamemaster:We're not canonically in Pathfinder.

Gamemaster:Actually, you know what?

Johnny:I thought the French were.

Anzu:Okay.

Gamemaster:No, the French are canonically in Pathfinder.

Gamemaster:So I was going to say France isn't canonical in this setting, but France is canonical in this setting because of Earth, like with a U. So... France is out there.

Johnny:Yeah, France is out there.

Johnny:Bonaparte's still running around.

Johnny:Arsenic didn't kill him.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Either way, you guys are set up in the morning.

Johnny:I think the other thing you say, we want to trade it for the keystone.

Gamemaster:You find a nice booth.

Gamemaster:What's the game plan?

Arctos:We're going to drive out.

Arctos:We're going to tell them, hey guys, we have these paintings.

Arctos:We want to trade it.

Arctos:And then, yeah, just be up front with him because we were not up front the first time.

Johnny:If you don't know what that is, the heart will know what that is.

Arctos:I guess he'll go, that's not enough.

Arctos:Okay.

Johnny:And then we'll go from there.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Benny:Okay.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:Pick up the radio from.

Gamemaster:Did you want to do another check on your items that you didn't get last time?

Gamemaster:Because now would be the time to do it, if you like.

Anzu:Yes!

Anzu:Can I do it in the morning or just like a full 24 hours?

Gamemaster:I will... Technically, it's supposed to be a full 24 hours, but I will just make it like a daily distinction.

Gamemaster:So you slept, so it's a new day.

Anzu:Fantastic.

Anzu:We'll start with the Joker.

Anzu:I think that was Arcana.

Gamemaster:Yes, the choker is Arcana.

Johnny:Is Illmari back?

Gamemaster:Illmari is not back.

Johnny:He had a plus one to this guy.

Johnny:Oh!

Johnny:33.

Anzu:Huge!

Gamemaster:What did we get?

Gamemaster:33.

Gamemaster:Okay, so with a 33, you super know what this is.

Gamemaster:This is a choker of elocution.

Gamemaster:Specifically, a Chthonian choker of elocution.

Gamemaster:It gives you a plus one bonus to society checks, plus one item bonus to society checks, and the ability to understand, speak, and write Chthonian, the language of demons.

Johnny:I mean, if we ever run into a demon, I could talk to it.

Gamemaster:It also reduces the DC of a flat check to perform an auditory action while deafened from five to three.

Anzu:Okay.

Arctos:demons the most.

Johnny:But also, everything I do is auditory.

Arctos:My healing is not auditory.

Anzu:So it should go to Johnny.

Arctos:I don't want it.

Anzu:Is that what I'm kind of hearing from this?

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:Unless you want the plus one to society, Anzu.

Anzu:I think it's OK.

Arctos:We can always take turns.

Arctos:Whenever he needs to do society stuff, we give him a choker.

Johnny:That's true.

Johnny:Take it off.

Arctos:Is there anything else you failed earlier?

Benny:Files.

Anzu:Yes, now I need to do the

Anzu:Potion again, which I think I also did Arcana for.

Gamemaster:Arcana or medicine are your options.

Anzu:All right.

Anzu:Things are working today.

Anzu:I hope.

Gamemaster:28 is a success.

Gamemaster:These are greater addiction suppressants, three doses of which.

Johnny:Oh.

Gamemaster:which suppresses the effects of addiction for a day, doesn't increase the addiction DC, and gives you a plus three item bonus to saving against addiction.

Gamemaster:These are generalized addiction suppressants as well, so they work on any addiction.

Arctos:Good to know.

Arctos:Can I take one?

Johnny:That's good.

Anzu:How many are there?

Gamemaster:Three.

Gamemaster:They also smell like death.

Gamemaster:When you pop it open, the reason you know it's not corn syrup is because it smells like some unholy mixture of rotting sewage and fully decaying corpse.

Johnny:Oh, that's big in case we need drugs.

Gamemaster:It'd be unpleasant to drink.

Arctos:What level is this?

Gamemaster:Ten.

Gamemaster:These are greater addiction suppressants.

Arctos:Oh.

Arctos:that's less just one more that's one left

Anzu:I will put one in my sleeve.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Like in the portable whole sleeves or just like in a regular sleeve?

Anzu:Ah, yes, in my sleeve of storage, yes.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:I'll take one, unless Benny thinks he's going to start doing drugs.

Benny:Too young for drugs.

Anzu:Yeah, I'm not sure that's included on the permission slip.

Gamemaster:Is it included on the permission slip?

Benny:No.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Can't do drugs.

Johnny:Sorry, kid.

Gamemaster:It's important to know these things.

Benny:Fine.

Benny:I'm used to it.

Johnny:All right, should we get this keystone?

Arctos:So I don't think we're going to go to the front gate.

Anzu:Hopefully.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You have already been to this particular sub-nexus, so no rolls or anything like that.

Johnny:Did we get the radio from Anaïs or a nook?

Gamemaster:You guys can just drive over to where you're headed.

Gamemaster:It's in Sableclutch.

Gamemaster:What is the plan?

Gamemaster:You're just pulling up to the front gate again?

Arctos:We have that radio.

Gamemaster:Okay, you can pick up, it'd be from Anouk, she's the mechanical one.

Gamemaster:You can pick up the, she effectively went to RadioShack and bought a small portable radio and just tuned it to this particular frequency.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:But, yeah.

Arctos:Cool.

Johnny:Pull up a little bit.

Arctos:So I think we're going to try the frequency the heart tried to talk to us through and then just hope that they'll respond.

Johnny:Yeah, I'll just... This is... What did I say my name was?

Gamemaster:Have a good day.

Johnny:This is Claude Picasso.

Johnny:I don't know what the name was.

Johnny:We were here the other day.

Johnny:We've come back with the Quinn as well as some other artworks.

Johnny:We would like to trade it for the Keystone.

Johnny:We're here for the Keystone.

Johnny:We're willing to trade.

Johnny:We just want the Keystone and nothing else, and we'll give you the Quinn.

Johnny:And I'll give him the name of the Quinn piece.

Gamemaster:I get a diplomacy check, please.

Johnny:I have many things.

Johnny:I'm loaded up for this one.

Arctos:I ate him by just saying, I am Sir Octos.

Gamemaster:You can say I'm Sir Arctos.

Arctos:No, I'm kidding.

Gamemaster:I'm not going to tell you if that's going to aid him.

Arctos:I'm kidding.

Johnny:Can I aid myself?

Gamemaster:No.

Johnny:Oh, that's pretty good.

Arctos:I'm kidding.

Arctos:Oh, yeah.

Arctos:Dope.

Gamemaster:Sorry, what did you get?

Johnny:30.

Gamemaster:30.

Gamemaster:I heard 13, and I was trying to figure out how that was good.

Gamemaster:30 is much better.

Gamemaster:Okay, so there's a hiss of static coming out of the radio.

Gamemaster:And for a good while, you'd think that either they're just not responding or it didn't work or something along those lines.

Gamemaster:And then there is, in the same very staticky, garbled voice that you heard last time you were here, come around back.

Johnny:Hold the round back.

Anzu:Amazing.

Benny:Benny Whippin.

Arctos:I pull up my hood.

Johnny:Put on my poncho.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Gamemaster:Put on your ponchos, pull up your hoods, as unassuming as you could possibly be, which is not very.

Gamemaster:You drive back to the loading dock that you had originally met with that figure.

Johnny:um

Arctos:Thank you.

Gamemaster:It does, once again, the garage door opens for you into the sub-partitioned interior of this sub-nexus.

Gamemaster:And there is, once again, a figure...

Gamemaster:covered in metal with exterior arms and looks like another walkie-talkie pulled in front off of some kind of weird backpack thing standing there waiting for you to pull it.

Gamemaster:God, I don't remember what color his clothing is.

Gamemaster:So I have to double-check that.

Arctos:Purple?

Gamemaster:I think it's purple.

Benny:Sausage colored.

Gamemaster:But...

Benny:A speckle.

Gamemaster:Sausage colored?

Anzu:It's kind of nondescript.

Johnny:Hello.

Gamemaster:Second.

Benny:I think it's very well described.

Anzu:It's just there's so much variance there.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Actually, I'm looking at this and it does say sausage colored.

Anzu:Gosh, you're not supposed to give him points like that.

Gamemaster:Did I?

Gamemaster:I don't know if I actually ever described the color.

Gamemaster:That's great.

Arctos:I heard purple.

Gamemaster:There's a figure standing on the other end of the partitioned loading bay wearing one of the Prime Meridian clothing, but this is a more styled version.

Johnny:you you

Gamemaster:There's more ornamentation on the lapel.

Gamemaster:Large chunks have been cut out to make room for metal piping.

Benny:And.

Gamemaster:Metal piping goes to a backpack.

Gamemaster:Palms and arms have the spikes in them.

Gamemaster:Yeah, sorry, not spikes, rods.

Gamemaster:Manipulating an articulated arm.

Gamemaster:Yeah, no, it just says sausage-colored.

Gamemaster:We'll go with purple.

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:No, it would be orange.

Gamemaster:It's prime meridian.

Gamemaster:It's orange.

Arctos:God damn it, Craig.

Gamemaster:I'm calling it audible.

Gamemaster:It's orange.

Gamemaster:Which, you know, under certain lights is sausage-like.

Arctos:It's kind of sausage-like.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Benny:say it is we get out

Gamemaster:So in the same, like, garbled walkie-talkie sound out of the radio that you're holding in your hand.

Gamemaster:very familiar to the last time you were here, the voice will say, get out.

Johnny:we get out that's on the trunk go around

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Gamemaster:It'll say, show me the painting.

Arctos:I'll open it.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:I'll open it.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:He will walk over to you in that weird side-to-side three-thumb rhythmic gait that he has.

Arctos:Wait, wait, wait.

Arctos:Can you describe that again?

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Arctos:Three...

Gamemaster:So his robes go all the way down to the floor such that you cannot see his legs.

Gamemaster:And when he walks, there's a one, two, three thumping sound as opposed to the one, two that you would normally expect.

Gamemaster:And there's a kind of like side by side swaying motion as he walks forward.

Arctos:He's a Thessian!

Gamemaster:And he will walk forward.

Benny:They don't have those.

Johnny:you you

Gamemaster:and gesture for you to hold the painting up so that he can take a better look at it.

Gamemaster:And then the arm that was holding the walkie-talkie retracts and then pops back out again with a magnifying glass that then gets held in front of the painting and gives it a once-over, presumably checking to see if it's real.

Gamemaster:I'll take a crafting or an arcana check at this moment as he's investigating it.

Gamemaster:Just for a little bit of extra tidbit of info there.

Anzu:My Arcana is better, but is there any reason I would want to do crafting instead?

Arctos:you

Anzu:Let's just go with Arcana.

Gamemaster:They would give you different information.

Johnny:I'll do a crafting check.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Why not?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:For old time's sake.

Anzu:Big Arcana.

Johnny:Yeah.

Anzu:Big.

Johnny:Yeah, a little crafting.

Johnny:I got an 11.

Gamemaster:What did we get?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:Just an untrained... What's this stuff doing?

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Okay, so with an 11, with an 11, Johnny sees the arm moving, and its movement is way more fluid than your fairly confident machines can make.

Gamemaster:If you had to guess that there's something organic in that arm that's moving it around.

Johnny:um um

Gamemaster:With the 31 Arcana, there is this interesting kind of tonal rhythmic clicking sound that is emanating out of around the area where you would expect the larynx to be on this person, although you know that there is a palladium rod driven right through the vocal cord area.

Gamemaster:that is interesting to you in a few ways.

Gamemaster:First of all, it is like musical almost in a way.

Anzu:Thank you.

Gamemaster:It's very subtle.

Gamemaster:You have to like strain to hear it.

Gamemaster:But the other thing with the 31 Arcana is that you see that as the...

Gamemaster:As the clicks occur in the throat as it's looking over the painting, there is a very, very faint thread of magic pulled from the rod in the vocal cord that seems to pass through a number of other rods distributed throughout this person's body and then further back into the facility.

Benny:All right.

Anzu:Seems like some kind of communication.

Gamemaster:But sorry.

Johnny:um um

Arctos:It's the Thessian magic.

Arctos:Remember, they have those weird rod sling rod things.

Anzu:Is it at all a musical in a harmony sense?

Gamemaster:I think even with a 31, it's happening on such a low register.

Gamemaster:You're hearing effectively the sound of his own internal vocal cords moving.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:It's not supposed to be vocalizing anything, so I don't know if you'd have enough information there to place it as specifically a harmony.

Anzu:Very well.

Gamemaster:But you do get enough info that it is interesting that it has a musical quality to it.

Gamemaster:After a moment of careful scrutinization, this person does retract this magnifying armature and will say, It appears to be real.

Gamemaster:I will let you in to see our collector now, if you so choose.

Anzu:Yes, that would be great.

Johnny:Bye.

Anzu:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Good.

Gamemaster:Follow me.

Gamemaster:Don't talk to anyone.

Gamemaster:Don't touch anything.

Gamemaster:and it will turn around, and with its weird side-to-side gait, walk towards one of the back walls of the sub-partitioned area, which will swing open to reveal a door that appears to head further into the facility as he gets closer to it.

Benny:you you

Gamemaster:He does not look back to see if you guys follow, he's just assuming that you are.

Johnny:I have a plus one to that.

Anzu:Yeah, absolutely.

Gamemaster:Okay, so as you head further into the facility, I don't know... Arctos and Johnny...

Gamemaster:make society checks for me, please.

Gamemaster:Because your two characters would be the only characters that would have had a chance to see the inner workings of a Prime Meridian facility previously for very different reasons.

Arctos:Arctos doesn't expect to stoke like a normal one.

Gamemaster:But there is a possibility that either of you would have been in one before.

Arctos:He thinks it's a front.

Johnny:Thanks to my new choker.

Johnny:I got a 16.

Johnny:I gave it to myself.

Arctos:It's society, you said?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:It is society.

Gamemaster:Oh, I could give you the choker so that that bonus gets added automatically.

Benny:you you

Johnny:We're good.

Gamemaster:What did we get, Arctos?

Arctos:Joker.

Gamemaster:24.

Arctos:Got 24.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Oh, when you said you gave it to yourself, you gave yourself the item.

Gamemaster:Great.

Johnny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:That solves my problems.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:So, the...

Anzu:you

Gamemaster:The interior that you start walking through is indeed not similar to what Arctos has seen previously.

Gamemaster:Arctos has, as part of his duties with Minister Vane, would have toured some of the Prime Meridian office buildings and the like.

Gamemaster:Vane has no reason to come to a sub-nexus.

Gamemaster:necessarily um so the part that you walk through is this very claustrophobic uh part of this facility you're walking on metal um metal like flooring what's the like chain like like like what a catwalk would be made out of

Arctos:Oh.

Anzu:Hmm.

Gamemaster:if that makes sense.

Gamemaster:It's only suspended like a foot off of the ground of this catwalk.

Gamemaster:The reason for it is because there are the walls, the floor, and the ceiling are covered in these flexile cable coverings, encasements, and pipes, and tubes, and the like.

Gamemaster:And they need to be able to access them in case there is some reason for the workers here to engage in this part of the facility.

Gamemaster:There are multiple places where you have to kind of move around, just pillars coming out of the ground where it seems that there are pipes and stuff that couldn't be moved for the sake of this particular hallway.

Arctos:you

Gamemaster:It gives a weird organic feeling in that...

Gamemaster:Very abstractly, it feels like you're walking through the esophagus of a very large creature, for lack of a better term.

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:The pipes hum almost and pulse with a little bit of heat, and there are fluids that move through some of the flexile tubing that causes them to almost move and sway back and forth as the flow increases and decreases.

Gamemaster:But it's all very...

Gamemaster:sterile.

Gamemaster:Everything here is made out of metal and there are very harsh white lights.

Gamemaster:It's not organic in any means.

Gamemaster:It's just kind of replicating that kind of feeling.

Gamemaster:You make a few sharp turns.

Gamemaster:You're not sure if the area was purposefully designed to be difficult to navigate if you were an intruder, but...

Gamemaster:It definitely accomplishes that task to the point that if any of you are trying to remember the way back, I would appreciate a check from you.

Gamemaster:I don't know what check I would actually necessarily require.

Anzu:Epic.

Gamemaster:Probably survival.

Gamemaster:I think it would be a survival check to be able to remember the path back to where you've parked your car from wherever you're heading.

Johnny:29.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Johnny with a 29.

Gamemaster:Okay, Johnny's mind is a steel trap.

Gamemaster:He knows where he is.

Gamemaster:He knows where he's going.

Gamemaster:He knows where he's been.

Gamemaster:And it all does match the blueprints.

Arctos:Well, to give him credit, he did look at the blueprints to blow it up already.

Gamemaster:So it's good that your source for those blueprints was correct.

Gamemaster:You pass through a number of these cramped hallways.

Gamemaster:Every once in a while, there are spots where it branches into a few different paths.

Gamemaster:At one point, you do pass, it looks like, two workers with similar-looking palladium rods driven into different parts of their arms and their throats, but less than the person you're currently following.

Johnny:diplomacy now we're talking

Gamemaster:working on one piece of sub-assembly of the interior of this building.

Gamemaster:Can I get a diplomacy or society check as you pass them by?

Benny:you

Gamemaster:You can if you want, but Johnny did crit.

Arctos:Can I make a diplomacy?

Arctos:Never mind.

Arctos:I'll just make a society check because I'm cool.

Gamemaster:You can do that as well.

Gamemaster:That's fine.

Arctos:Where's the society?

Arctos:We live in a society.

Gamemaster:You do, in fact, live in a society.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Oh, no.

Gamemaster:Art just has a minus one to his intelligence.

Gamemaster:Why did you rule a society?

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:With a 17 society, I don't think anything necessarily stands out to you here.

Gamemaster:With a 34 crit in diplomacy, there is... The thing that immediately stands out to you is you would, as you're walking by...

Gamemaster:expect people working on something together to be talking to each other in some way, like with their mouths and saying things.

Gamemaster:But it is weirdly silent as you round the corner in the direction that they're moving.

Gamemaster:And...

Gamemaster:As you approach, you hear a similar set of clicks that Anzu had picked up on earlier.

Gamemaster:But with the Crit Society, the other thing you notice is as you walk past, both of the heads of the people working seem to almost imperceptibly turn to keep you just in the periphery of their vision as you walk by.

Gamemaster:With a...

Johnny:Freaky.

Gamemaster:With a precision where both of them move at the exact same time and stop at the exact same time with their head movements that you would deem as unnatural.

Gamemaster:With a crit on the society check.

Arctos:Well, they're all drones.

Gamemaster:But regardless, you continue to press through.

Gamemaster:And to your surprise, after a number of particularly winding turns in this weird, nondescript mess of machinery, because it is also true that as you're walking through, there is nothing to describe necessarily what this massive machinery is doing.

Gamemaster:There are a lot of pipes, they're clearly moving fluids, and there are wires run places, but there's no...

Gamemaster:end terminals there's no indication of what they're being run to and from or transporting and I think I know passive crafting isn't really a thing but I think with your passive crafting checks none of you would have an immediate thought as to what this has to do with like trains moving around necessarily uh

Arctos:Well, Arctos thinks it's a sleeper network.

Gamemaster:Sure.

Gamemaster:For what?

Arctos:He doesn't know, but he knows it's something.

Gamemaster:Oh, okay.

Gamemaster:It's clandestine, but yeah, okay.

Arctos:It's like a NASA.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:But to your surprise, after making your way through a number of these winding internal paths, you end up in the main lobby.

Gamemaster:of this area.

Gamemaster:It seems that he's actually brought you towards the front of the building, like where you would be had you entered through the front gate, because you took the back door and were not actually able to go through that gate in the first place.

Arctos:Perfect.

Gamemaster:And this does match with Arctos' understanding of what a Prime Meridian facility looks like.

Gamemaster:The front entrance is this ornate marble...

Gamemaster:Like, almost set up as a lounge waiting area.

Gamemaster:There's some chairs.

Gamemaster:There's some vending machines.

Gamemaster:There's a lot of natural light.

Gamemaster:Somebody's taking care of some plants.

Gamemaster:It's all just, you know, it's a very stark contrast to the area that you had passed through before.

Gamemaster:Before you are...

Gamemaster:pulled into, as you pass by, you move up to what would be the second floor of this building, and you are pulled into, or directed into an office by this person that you've been following.

Gamemaster:The name on the office is Archmechanic Hogan Voss Darkmoor.

Anzu:Let's see.

Gamemaster:And he will, the person you've been following will gesture into the interior of this office.

Benny:Could have guessed.

Gamemaster:And he will say, Darkmoor will be here in 15 to 30 minutes.

Gamemaster:Just wait.

Arctos:What's your name, by the way?

Gamemaster:My name is, what is this man's name?

Gamemaster:This man's name is Low-Mechanitor Exitum-ρ-15.

Arctos:Place to mission.

Gamemaster:I will be standing outside for when you wish to return to your vehicle.

Arctos:Someone write that down.

Arctos:Thank you.

Gamemaster:And you are free to enter the office if you like.

Johnny:we enter the office.

Anzu:Sure.

Gamemaster:The interior of the office is relatively unadorned.

Gamemaster:There are a series of filing cabinets.

Gamemaster:There's a pretty large desk that is now completely empty, except for what appears to be a fountain pen and an inkwell.

Gamemaster:and a very small plaque that says X Mechanic on it.

Gamemaster:And that's it.

Gamemaster:There are no papers left on the desk.

Gamemaster:There's no personal accoutrement or the like.

Gamemaster:Very plain.

Arctos:that checks out.

Gamemaster:There is, on the other side of the desk, a series of two guest chairs and what looks to be a small, not particularly comfortable fabric couch.

Benny:They also on the couch.

Gamemaster:that could be used theoretically for taking visitors.

Gamemaster:It doesn't look like it's ever been used, but it's there.

Arctos:I'll sit on one of the chairs.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:So, the chair is smaller than would normally support Arctos's frame, but does not buckle under the weight.

Arctos:Great.

Gamemaster:It takes bare weight like a champ.

Arctos:Johnny, I'm going to motion to the other one.

Gamemaster:You guys can take a seat.

Johnny:I will take the other seat This is a weird place

Arctos:The other chair.

Arctos:The Prime Meridian, this org is, they tend to be worshippers of the host, right?

Arctos:Or are they a different org?

Gamemaster:Yes.

Gamemaster:No, they're big worshippers of the host.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:And, like, to that point, the Low-Mechanitor that you followed through had a pretty large raiment of the host.

Anzu:I don't.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:anything you'd like to do while you wait for the Archmechanic to stop by?

Arctos:What's the, how big is the room?

Gamemaster:You could just wait.

Gamemaster:I'll show up, supposedly.

Anzu:Yeah.

Johnny:Just hang out for a little bit.

Gamemaster:Uh, like, 15 by 10 feet.

Gamemaster:It's, like, pretty... It's not terrible for an office.

Arctos:Should we resonate?

Arctos:No, no, that's great.

Anzu:No, that's alright.

Arctos:No.

Arctos:Alright, alright.

Arctos:We can just wait.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:Just relax.

Gamemaster:You hang out for exactly 15 minutes before the Archmechanic, or who you presume to be the Archmechanic, walks in.

Gamemaster:Mr. Darkmoor is a... Well, that's a hard question to answer.

Gamemaster:He's definitely humanoid.

Arctos:All right.

Gamemaster:There is no skin showing.

Gamemaster:He is about, like, a little under six feet, probably.

Gamemaster:He's wearing the same orange clothing that you had seen on the Luma Canada and the like.

Gamemaster:But you cannot see his face.

Gamemaster:At first you think that there is a kind of metal mask that has been put directly over the face, but...

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:Then he speaks and you see that the lower jaw is articulated and you gather that either the mask is physically attached to the face, like surgically, or the mask is the face.

Gamemaster:It is unclear at this point.

Arctos:I know.

Gamemaster:But out of the mask, there is a tube that comes like from the side of the mouth.

Gamemaster:back towards what seems to be a very similar looking backpack as what you had seen on the other person.

Gamemaster:You cannot see their neck because there is a shroud that comes up to here.

Benny:you you

Gamemaster:The mask is attached to fabric such that you see the mask and then the openings of a hood.

Gamemaster:But you would gather that he probably has some sort of palladium rod there too.

Gamemaster:The...

Gamemaster:Orange robes extend down to his shoulder, and then his arms similarly look like there have been metal plates that have been either attached or are replacing the skin of this person's upper hands, the bit that you can see, at least.

Johnny:you

Benny:you

Gamemaster:talking about hands, neither of them are presumably his original hands.

Gamemaster:One of them has eight fingers on it.

Gamemaster:It's six of these fingers, and then he has what appears to be two thumbs, both of them fully mechanical, articulated by what looked to be some kind of pneumatics.

Arctos:you

Gamemaster:And the other hand appears to be some kind of replaceable implement.

Gamemaster:You can see that there is what looks to be

Gamemaster:Something that maybe would hold a pen on a rotating stand, such that you could unscrew or in some way remove that pen holder and replace it with something else.

Gamemaster:A very...

Gamemaster:It does not match the person, because previously when you spoke to, like, the Low-Mechanitor and the like, he was speaking through the radio.

Gamemaster:His voice was very static-y, and it was difficult to tell what they were saying.

Gamemaster:This person, Mr. Darkmoor, when he speaks, the mask opens, and it just sounds like normal, like a normal person speaking.

Gamemaster:There's no distortion there.

Arctos:He has autonomy.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:And he'll say, well...

Gamemaster:I'm honestly quite surprised after I heard about the little bit of an incident that you all had last time that you would show your faces so soon.

Benny:you you

Gamemaster:But I am happy that it appears that you came with an actual piece of art.

Gamemaster:So he sits down.

Gamemaster:There is a very audible creaking sound from his chair as it gets a little deformed.

Arctos:That's why the chairs work for the bear.

Johnny:Dude's 10 tons.

Gamemaster:Uh-huh.

Gamemaster:And he will say, all right, so I heard from Exitum-ρ-15 that you had a nice piece of art.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:I'd like to observe it myself, if you don't mind.

Gamemaster:Yeah, it's in a canvas bag, so you guys can take it out to show him.

Anzu:I presume we've just been carrying it.

Anzu:I mean, it's pretty large.

Arctos:Yeah, Arctos will be carrying that.

Arctos:Indeed.

Arctos:other artwork as well i know he doesn't care about the other arctos the other heart but yeah

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Yeah, but you can have it.

Gamemaster:That's fine.

Gamemaster:You can put the canvas of this one down on the desk, and you see that the pen holder thing detaches, and out of the hole that is his wrist emerges a series of different lenses of different colors and shapes, and the pen thing retracts into a cavity in his arm.

Johnny:Cool.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Arctos:Does he look at the spire?

Gamemaster:As he's looking through, we'll get to that.

Gamemaster:As he starts looking at it, he'll say, how did you come upon this piece?

Arctos:It's confidential.

Johnny:A friend of... Oh.

Gamemaster:Confidential?

Johnny:I'm being told to stop.

Arctos:It's legal.

Gamemaster:Is...

Arctos:It's not going to get you in trouble.

Gamemaster:We'll see.

Gamemaster:We have a bit of an issue there.

Gamemaster:How am I to trust you that you legally obtained it if you won't tell me where you obtained it?

Arctos:First of all, how about you authenticate it and we can chat about all of this.

Arctos:That's all right with you.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:He passes the various lenses over.

Gamemaster:He takes out what looks to be a tuning fork of some kind, and he taps it on the side of the canvas.

Gamemaster:He does note the painted over bit of where you think the Pharos is.

Gamemaster:And you see that he swaps to what looks to be a blue tinted lens and looks in that area and then swaps back to the lens that he was already using.

Arctos:Does he look at Arctos?

Gamemaster:And after a moment, he says, this is indeed an original.

Gamemaster:This is a Quinn.

Gamemaster:Now, as I was asking, this is the first time we've met each other.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:I've done background checks on those of you who are recognizable since your last visit.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you're the only one he knows.

Arctos:Yes.

Gamemaster:But it would reassure me and my client if we could get at least some guarantee that this is, in fact, not going to cause us trouble.

Arctos:I can guarantee that.

Arctos:Since you know who I am.

Anzu:It's.

Gamemaster:The issue is, the last time you were really seen in public, it wasn't with whoever these people are.

Gamemaster:Are you here under Minister Vane's guidance?

Arctos:Minister Vane is allowing

Arctos:And his estate's allowing us to have this painting.

Arctos:I've cleared it.

Arctos:If you need to contact them, it is allowed.

Johnny:It's confidential, but he is letting me have it.

Gamemaster:Uh...

Arctos:Hey, I turned to Johnny as he laughs.

Arctos:I didn't know he'd recognize me, to be honest with you.

Gamemaster:He will say... He will say...

Johnny:Arctos, you're the only talking bear.

Benny:And he just throws his hands up.

Johnny:Arctos, you're the talking bear.

Arctos:I have a poncho.

Arctos:I just put the hood down.

Arctos:What's the point?

Gamemaster:If I can speak to Minister Vane about this, then that's fine.

Gamemaster:We will... Okay.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:You can call majordomo.

Arctos:Minister Vane's currently...

Arctos:I thought it would have been public knowledge that there would have been a congressional meeting.

Gamemaster:I don't know if it's necessarily the best idea for you to go around telling people that the minister isn't disposed, but I'll overlook it.

Gamemaster:It might be, but you don't know if this guy necessarily is up to date on it.

Arctos:Sorry.

Arctos:Oh, okay.

Gamemaster:That's what he says.

Gamemaster:Um... It normally is, but it seems that this guy was not aware of that information.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:Okay.

Arctos:Arctos wouldn't have slipped that if he did.

Arctos:I just assumed it was like Congress where there's like, oh, burn session.

Benny:you

Arctos:Okay.

Johnny:yeah uh 12-sided blue diamond sort of thing

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:Um... He'll say, okay, this is real.

Gamemaster:Uh...

Gamemaster:The Low-Mechanitor told me that you were asking for a keystone.

Arctos:December 14, I believe.

Anzu:And we believe your patron should be aware of this.

Gamemaster:One moment.

Gamemaster:There is a...

Gamemaster:grinding sound as if like a gearbox somewhere inside of this person has halted halfway and then a completely different voice emanates out of the mask and says we are unaware of this keystone we are unaware of the number 14 in this situation

Johnny:There's a gold box.

Johnny:It might have come in a gold box.

Gamemaster:I have many things in gold boxes.

Johnny:Is any of them a 12-sided blue diamond?

Anzu:Thank you.

Johnny:We were told you had it.

Gamemaster:Why would you be aware of the interior of my vault?

Johnny:We were kind of on a scavenger hunt.

Johnny:We were told...

Johnny:There was a whole party.

Johnny:It was a really long thing.

Johnny:We can kind of give you the whole rundown, but they were... They told us that... We just... We were told that... I assume I'm speaking to... What is the name?

Johnny:All my notes are in Pathbuilder.

Johnny:What's the name of this heart?

Benny:rapid connection rapid connection

Johnny:Rapid Connection.

Johnny:Thank you.

Johnny:I assume I'm speaking to Rapid Connection.

Johnny:Bow my head.

Johnny:We were told that...

Gamemaster:Who told you?

Johnny:You would have one of the keystones we were looking for, and you would be amicable to trade it for some fine art.

Johnny:I don't think we got a name, but I'll give it.

Arctos:I actually don't.

Johnny:Yeah, I'll give them the rundown.

Gamemaster:You'll tell them about the Harlequins and the party and all that kind of stuff?

Johnny:I feel like it's more or less public knowledge.

Arctos:Yeah, well, Iconoclasm is the only sanctioned group to be looking into the Voidsong.

Gamemaster:There is another pause, and there's another gear grinding sound.

Johnny:They'll figure it out.

Arctos:So we'll just be like, yeah, we're kind of doing it.

Johnny:We're trying to look in the, looking at the board song.

Johnny:We ended up there.

Gamemaster:And then the first voice will come back through the mask, and Darkbor will say...

Gamemaster:It seems Connection wants to talk to you in person.

Gamemaster:This is apparently weird for it.

Gamemaster:Which, to be fair, we've never had somebody come by and ask for a specific piece of Connection's collection.

Arctos:We didn't know it had a collection.

Gamemaster:Traditionally, we just give them money and then they leave.

Anzu:We're certainly amenable.

Arctos:Yeah.

Johnny:We need the keystone.

Arctos:Yes.

Arctos:By the way, do you want to look at the two other arts as well?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:I see the name of the people.

Gamemaster:Who are they by?

Benny:Bomber and Sons.

Gamemaster:There's a pause, a slight grinding of gears, and then Darkmoor's voice comes back out and says, we have no interest in those.

Arctos:Very good if you want to see it, but OK.

Gamemaster:I don't.

Arctos:OK.

Gamemaster:Okay, this is exciting for me and for all of you.

Gamemaster:Rarely do I have a reason to go into Rapid's fame.

Gamemaster:And you're all going to be the first members, not members, of Prime Meridian to see Rapid Connection since its birth over 200 years ago.

Johnny:No, we're very friendly.

Arctos:Is this dangerous for us?

Gamemaster:Well, it shouldn't be.

Gamemaster:Were you planning on being hostile?

Arctos:Okay.

Arctos:No.

Benny:more of a nickname I think

Johnny:The poncho boys are nothing but friendly.

Anzu:I, in fact, see this as an honor.

Gamemaster:Is that the name of your group, the Poncho Boys?

Arctos:No.

Anzu:No, we're members of Iconoclasm.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:We're sort of our own subgroup.

Gamemaster:Not the Poncho Boys.

Arctos:You could just take off the hoods, guys.

Arctos:They know who we all are.

Johnny:Yeah, we're subgroup.

Johnny:Arctos, you're the only one wearing a hood.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Johnny:The rest of us just have our ponchos.

Arctos:I'm just going to accidentally say Anzu's name.

Arctos:Anzu, they know.

Arctos:They got us, Anzu.

Johnny:Anzu from Belvedere!

Arctos:It's like when you're playing hide and seek and then one person gets caught and they just turn to the other people and they're like, they caught us!

Benny:He's over there.

Johnny:Instant snitch.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Come on!

Arctos:I should have dyed my fur black again.

Johnny:You're still the only talking pair.

Gamemaster:Oh, wow, a talking bear, but presumably a different talking bear.

Gamemaster:This one has different fur.

Arctos:He looks like a dirty version of the other one.

Gamemaster:I don't know if anybody would say that necessarily.

Arctos:It's not going to be real black.

Benny:That is crazy.

Arctos:It's just going to be really poorly done dye.

Arctos:That's just going to look like dirty water.

Gamemaster:Oh, hey, that looks like Arctos rolled around in some dirt.

Gamemaster:Um, okay.

Gamemaster:So the, uh, the Archmechanic will get up, uh, and then walk out of the office.

Gamemaster:Uh, notably he does not have the weird, uh, uh, three-step gate that the, um, the Low-Mechanitor did.

Arctos:That's what Arctos would look like.

Gamemaster:Uh,

Gamemaster:He'll step out of the office.

Gamemaster:It looks like he says something to the Low-Mechanitor, and then they walk off as he gestures for all of you to follow him back into the lobby and into an elevator that will head down into the bowels of this sub-nexus.

Gamemaster:What is this?

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Yep.

Arctos:That's clearly not a polar bear.

Arctos:It's something else.

Benny:It is not I, the only talking bear in all the land.

Arctos:It must be a talking brown bear.

Gamemaster:Um...

Arctos:So you have aurora-colored armor.

Arctos:This is a different bear.

Arctos:It's a coincidence.

Arctos:It also has a monocle.

Arctos:Yes!

Arctos:You don't know bear culture.

Johnny:Your cape says Sir Arctos on it.

Arctos:He's the smartest bear there.

Benny:That was a gift from... That's how I know I'm not him, because I'm friends with him.

Johnny:Sir Arctos, the other talking bear.

Benny:He's a delight.

Benny:The smartest man I know.

Gamemaster:True.

Gamemaster:Objectively.

Benny:Generous, too.

Arctos:Do you know any big booty bears for my friend?

Gamemaster:So... So the Archmechanic...

Johnny:thank you

Gamemaster:gestures all of you to get into an elevator that appears to proceed downward.

Gamemaster:It is more than large enough for all of you.

Gamemaster:It appears that this is a freight elevator of some kind, or at least can be used in that capacity.

Gamemaster:The interior of this elevator is not the same aesthetic as the rest of this lobby area, and there is a...

Gamemaster:perhaps concerning number of clunking and grinding as the elevator starts to spin up and descend downward.

Benny:Thanks.

Gamemaster:The arc mechanicals say, I apologize, this machinery has not been activated in some decades or so, but I promise you it is still in working condition.

Arctos:when was the last time you visited this Fane you look great for your age i was being polite

Gamemaster:I last visited Rapid Connection when I first gained this position, which would be close to 70 years ago now.

Gamemaster:How would you know?

Johnny:Oh.

Gamemaster:I have no visible skill.

Gamemaster:Ah.

Gamemaster:I apologize.

Gamemaster:It's been a while since I've needed to interact with other people.

Gamemaster:And there is a extended period where you can't actually tell if the elevator is moving or not.

Gamemaster:But it appears it's just descending very, very slowly.

Johnny:No.

Gamemaster:Because about a minute into this elevator descending, you start to feel this weird tingle at your toes.

Arctos:No, he cut out.

Benny:He's gone.

Johnny:Oh, no.

Arctos:Right at the toes.

Anzu:Right at the tangle.

Anzu:Oh.

Arctos:Oh, music's back.

Gamemaster:Oh!

Benny:Oh, oh.

Johnny:And.

Anzu:Oh, look, he's all the way back there now.

Gamemaster:Yeah, I had to turn off my server.

Arctos:Tingle at the toes is where we got left.

Gamemaster:It's back there.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Gamemaster:Limbo will be down for a little bit as we reboot, and I have to figure out, maybe Limbo is the ghosts.

Gamemaster:Maybe, like, Foundry is the ghosts.

Arctos:There might be a memory leak or something.

Anzu:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Maybe.

Gamemaster:Either way, you start to feel a tingle at your feet that you would know as descending feet first into a Fane, which then gives you a measurable progress as you descend downward, because it takes some time for it to creep up your body that you know that the elevator is descending downwards.

Gamemaster:Eventually, however, after...

Gamemaster:What it was probably five minutes, but felt like much longer because it's the four of you in this elevator with the Archmechanic kind of just standing there.

Johnny:You.

Gamemaster:He's not making like small talk or anything like that.

Arctos:Are there like, what's pop culture in this country?

Benny:Try to make small talk.

Gamemaster:He's completely stock still, standing, just staring at the front of the elevator as you very slowly proceed downward.

Arctos:Is there sports?

Gamemaster:Yeah, there are sports.

Arctos:Arctos is going to try to be like, so what do you think about that?

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:You get a lot of one or two word answers.

Arctos:He's going to stop.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah, the Archmechanic... Arctos has interacted with enough people to know that the Archmechanic isn't being purposefully brusque.

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:He just doesn't know about any of the pop culture.

Gamemaster:He knows that there are sports.

Gamemaster:And that's it.

Gamemaster:But eventually, he would say, it is difficult for me to leave here for an extended period of time, else perhaps all of the trains at Prime Meridian will stop running.

Arctos:I can invite you to a sports game, you know, if you want in the future.

Benny:you you

Gamemaster:But I appreciate the offer.

Arctos:Oh?

Gamemaster:There is another grinding sound as it appears that the elevator comes to a stop.

Gamemaster:And... Pull the server back on now.

Gamemaster:We're going to have to wait a minute for Limbo to come back up, but it will come back up, I promise.

Gamemaster:And the doors of the elevator open.

Gamemaster:Roll a perception check, whoever would like to do that.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:Whoever up to two?

Gamemaster:Whoever up to two.

Gamemaster:Always up to two.

Gamemaster:We're not going to have all four of you rolling perception checks, because then we may as well just have one person roll with quadruple advantage.

Arctos:Oh, I'm a dumbed up.

Arctos:No, there's different modifiers.

Gamemaster:Still no.

Johnny:Yeah, that's a nice.

Arctos:OK, Google gave me a come on, finish the role.

Arctos:I got a nine, so I think my modifier is 13.

Arctos:but I'm double blind.

Benny:Ooh, let's see about controlled.

Gamemaster:Double blind.

Arctos:Because I don't have Foundry or https://btl.iridi.cc.

Gamemaster:And Pathbuilder is still down?

Arctos:Oh, I just assumed.

Gamemaster:I don't know.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Yeah, it is.

Arctos:So plus 15.

Johnny:I got it.

Gamemaster:I need to... And what was the one that you got, Noah?

Arctos:So 24.

Arctos:Is that what it is?

Arctos:22.

Johnny:I got a 12 plus 11 or 12.

Arctos:22.

Arctos:I got 22.

Gamemaster:You could also check Foundry at this point.

Gamemaster:It's back up.

Arctos:Oh, cool.

Johnny:Going back to Foundry.

Johnny:I'll just roll on Foundry.

Arctos:Okay, I have a plus 13, so that's 22 for me.

Gamemaster:How does it do that?

Johnny:Mine's still loading, one moment.

Arctos:DumbDumbMe for a second was like, how does Google let you change the number of the sides of the dice?

Arctos:And then I was like, it's just math.ram.

Gamemaster:That's crazy.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:15, not good.

Gamemaster:Okay, so with Arctos' role, I mean, the DC here is not very high to get the original, the basic gist of the place.

Gamemaster:You have been lowered into the Fane of presumably an old and more powerful heart than the ones that you have interacted with previously.

Gamemaster:This is one of, as per your research in Belvedere's archives, one of the three hearts that is used to control the entirety

Gamemaster:of train and bus travel within Hallia by Prime Meridian.

Gamemaster:There is the moment the elevators open, the sound of ticking.

Johnny:you you

Gamemaster:of many discrete mechanical components moving forward as if you were inside the interior of a watch.

Gamemaster:Looking outside, this elevator ends in a circular stone path that moves down above...

Gamemaster:Hundreds, if not thousands, of massive gears made out of the same dull gray metal that you've seen in rods embedded in a number of the entities that exist in the sub-Nexus.

Gamemaster:The gears themselves will move forward and switch back seemingly without any particular...

Gamemaster:It's not like a watch in that it constantly proceeds forward.

Gamemaster:It's as if each individual piece of this Giant mechanism that you're inside moves of its own volition.

Gamemaster:It looks like this from the interior.

Anzu:I roll to attack.

Johnny:Oh, whoa.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:You can, if you like,

Johnny:Take down the entire train system of this city-state.

Arctos:That might have been Johnny's plan for all we know.

Johnny:I roll to attack.

Gamemaster:You can.

Arctos:I rolled to attack Johnny.

Johnny:I probably miss.

Johnny:I don't even think I have a weapon.

Gamemaster:You can just punch it.

Johnny:Oh, I have a dagger.

Johnny:I pulled this dagger.

Gamemaster:You stab it.

Gamemaster:Okay, so...

Gamemaster:As you approach the central area, the arch mechanic gestures for you to step down into this central lower position.

Gamemaster:And he says, go on.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:You can talk to Rapid Connection there.

Gamemaster:As you descend downward, speaking to rapid connection here is interesting, because you have spoken to them previously, but it has been through mouthpieces.

Gamemaster:Rapid connection does not have a mouth.

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:Instead...

Gamemaster:Various pieces of gear and cog machinery rapidly move back and forth, and the sound of them moving against each other creates these tones that, if you kind of strain a little bit to here, replicate almost that of...

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:replicate that of human speech.

Gamemaster:It is similar to if you've heard somebody speaking through, not a synthesizer, what's the instrument where you put the tube in your mouth and then you play on the piano?

Anzu:Oh, I don't know what it's called, but I'm familiar.

Arctos:Well, we know of an item, and I guess it's in your collection.

Gamemaster:But you know what I'm talking about?

Anzu:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah, it's kind of like that, except instead of a piano being used to make the notes, it's the vibrations of different gears.

Johnny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:But it'll say...

Gamemaster:You have painting for me, and you know of my collection.

Anzu:Indeed.

Benny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Can I sway you?

Johnny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Instead of giving up my precious in my collection, I could give you currency.

Arctos:We kind of just want the keystone.

Johnny:Sorry.

Johnny:Yeah, we just need the keystone.

Arctos:Only 14 if you have multiple.

Gamemaster:I only have one, not 14.

Gamemaster:15,000 gold.

Johnny:Sorry.

Johnny:We really need the keystone.

Johnny:Sorry.

Gamemaster:Free transit throughout Hallia.

Arctos:Nice.

Arctos:No, no, no, no.

Arctos:We just want the keystone.

Johnny:Josh is really testing us personally right now.

Arctos:Arctos is like... Arctos is like... Pretty good.

Gamemaster:Priority.

Gamemaster:Access to Prime Meridian shipping lights.

Benny:i don't think we run a business enough we can get it more art for those other things but we also still need the keystone

Arctos:Pretty good, guys.

Anzu:Mm-hmm.

Arctos:Alright, fine.

Johnny:We really need the keystone.

Arctos:No.

Gamemaster:Roll a diplomacy check.

Arctos:Can I aid him?

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Arctos:Cool.

Arctos:Oh, no, that's supposed to have my modifier, which is 15.

Johnny:I am going to use a mythic point.

Johnny:Actually, first I'll use let's try that again.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:So I have a 32, if that's crit for my aid.

Benny:Huh.

Gamemaster:A32 is just a success, so you get to add one to this.

Arctos:All right.

Johnny:Josh, I have a question.

Johnny:Can I use let's try that again and then also a mythic point if this fails?

Johnny:Or is it one or the other?

Gamemaster:They're both reactions.

Johnny:Then I will use a mythic point.

Anzu:well well turns out he does have two keystones and he's gonna give both

Arctos:He's going to give us 14 of them.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:That was the best mythic point I've ever spent.

Benny:Get us priority.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:Get us free.

Johnny:Listen, rapid connection.

Benny:Get us free travel.

Johnny:This Quinn is a one of a kind, but we will forever be in your debt.

Johnny:And if we ever see any more art, tell you what,

Johnny:The Keystone and the Free Transit.

Johnny:Throw them in both.

Johnny:Anytime we see art, if we think we like it, we'll bring it to you.

Johnny:Nothing else?

Johnny:No other charges or anything else?

Johnny:Just those two items?

Gamemaster:There's a weird low-toned screech that you gather is Rapid Connection literally grinding its gears.

Gamemaster:And then after a moment, it says, present the Quinn.

Johnny:actors thank you

Arctos:Arctos, I hand it over.

Benny:Hook those.

Arctos:I walk over and toss it in.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:It says, please.

Gamemaster:Throw into central cortex.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You throw the painting in.

Gamemaster:It drops, and then just before it would actually touch the machinery, it stops in midair.

Gamemaster:There is a moment where it floats upward.

Johnny:you you

Gamemaster:And then...

Gamemaster:There are, it's strange.

Gamemaster:It looks like part of the painting is melting.

Gamemaster:And then you realize that some of the outer layer of the paint is just being abraded off in front of you by some kind of force being generated by the Heart, which is interesting.

Gamemaster:In multiple ways, perhaps, I'll let you get one perception check as it gets abraded away.

Benny:Who amongst us is the best perceiver?

Arctos:Well, it should be me, but... Oops.

Johnny:you

Benny:Hero?

Arctos:I don't have a hero point.

Benny:Mythic?

Arctos:I don't have a mythic.

Gamemaster:Now is the time to be pedantic.

Benny:Bardic Inspiration?

Arctos:I don't.

Arctos:I used it for my godspeed to run around the factor.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:He did use it on his Godspeed to run around the factory.

Gamemaster:It's good to know that with Godspeed you can run 20 miles an hour.

Anzu:which was very cool.

Johnny:You.

Gamemaster:Okay, within 18, you see that the paint gets abraded away to reveal the Pharos, where it looks like it had been covered over.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:And then the voice of the heart comes back and says, Hey, real, Quinn.

Gamemaster:Fine.

Gamemaster:I will, for...

Gamemaster:This quinn give you the keystone, as you say, as well as waive all prime meridian fees for travel.

Johnny:Yes.

Johnny:We don't have to pay the copper to ride.

Arctos:Does that include our license as a primary dude?

Gamemaster:Uh... Correct.

Arctos:Hell yeah.

Gamemaster:Roads are maintained by...

Gamemaster:Prime Meridian, and as such, traditional plebs used to pay licensing fees to drive on.

Arctos:Cool.

Gamemaster:an aperture inside of one of the gears will open and the painting will descend downward into it and then after a moment an ornate golden box will float up out of the same aperture and towards it would be Arctos because he was the one that threw the painting in please verify this is what you are looking for uh

Arctos:I opened the box for Anzu to look at it.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:You open the box and the blue crystal plump bob looking thing does float out.

Gamemaster:If you like, you can roll an arcana check on it to verify.

Gamemaster:Although you never actually got your hands on one before, so it's really just more identifying magic and hoping that it matches up.

Gamemaster:29.

Anzu:Right.

Anzu:Okay.

Anzu:29.

Johnny:Oh, I'll aid.

Johnny:Nope, that's the wrong one.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:He distracts me.

Gamemaster:It's harder to identify.

Johnny:Does that get into 30?

Gamemaster:What did you get?

Gamemaster:A 26, one sec.

Gamemaster:I have to double check what the DC is for this item.

Gamemaster:I should really just keep this table up the whole time.

Gamemaster:I keep searching for it on Pathfinder and then closing the tab once I've looked it up once and then needing to, it's fine.

Arctos:So it's now a 30.

Gamemaster:You got a 26, which is just barely a success, but it is a success.

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:which means you get plus one, which brings you to A30, which means you get a sense of what it does and learn any means of activating it.

Anzu:Thanks.

Arctos:Which we know is a success.

Gamemaster:You don't technically learn the name, but you do learn that this is a key that would allow entry to a magically sealed compartment of some kind.

Johnny:you

Anzu:It is some kind of magical key, guys, which I think is what we were looking for.

Gamemaster:I would say also on a success that there is... God, we don't have schools of magic, so I can't tell you the school.

Arctos:Gotcha.

Gamemaster:There is an element to this that would have you believe that it has some one-way communication capabilities, like a receiver.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:The rapid connection will say, are you pleased?

Johnny:thank you thank you very much rapid connection i'll bow very deeply anyone else

Anzu:Indeed.

Arctos:Yes.

Gamemaster:Please think of me if you come across any other quids or paintings.

Arctos:Do you like anything else besides paintings?

Arctos:We should keep Anaïs out?

Gamemaster:Trains.

Arctos:Good to know.

Arctos:All right.

Johnny:Transpainting.

Johnny:Thank you.

Arctos:Other people might try to get this as a headset.

Gamemaster:I do not.

Gamemaster:have it anymore.

Arctos:Sounds good.

Arctos:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Goodbye, friends of Rapid Connection.

Johnny:We did it.

Anzu:bye uh i think so let me see oh i'm not gonna be able to see oh

Gamemaster:And you are... The gears fall, not silent, they're continuing to turn, but they're no longer vocalizing anything.

Johnny:Bye, friend.

Johnny:Should we put the keystone in Anzu's sleeves?

Arctos:Imagine if we made a deal with this heart to just hold it for us and not give it to anyone else.

Arctos:Probably would have been smart.

Arctos:It would have been so funny.

Anzu:Josh, what is the bulk of the stone as well as the gold chest or box?

Johnny:Okay.

Gamemaster:Um, one second.

Gamemaster:The bulk, the chest itself is light, and the the stone is negligible.

Benny:Does it look like that?

Benny:How much bulk is a medium creature?

Anzu:Okay, so that's, yeah, I could fit, I put it in the chest and then into my sleeve.

Anzu:Each sleeve can hold five bulk.

Anzu:An individual item can be no more than one bulk.

Gamemaster:No.

Anzu:Too many.

Arctos:How about a 70 foot tall dead angel covered in gold?

Benny:A medium creature is six bulk.

Gamemaster:Doesn't fit in your sleeves.

Anzu:That is more than one.

Gamemaster:Mike, how did you color this Stone of Berenziah blue?

Gamemaster:But also, yes.

Benny:AI.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:You described it at the beginning.

Benny:I was just like, oh, so it's just those gems from Skyrim, but it's blue?

Benny:And I was like...

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah, that's exactly what it is.

Johnny:you you

Arctos:Should we just start going for other ones?

Gamemaster:But you can't put these into a crown to help you find gems in every chest you look at.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Benny:Yeah, all 20.

Anzu:if we find enough of them.

Benny:We're the only people.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you know what?

Gamemaster:Fine.

Gamemaster:If you can get your hands on all 20 of them, you can fashion them into a crowd for infinite gems.

Benny:We just push over a fucking canvas bag and it just dumps out all the fucking... The guy's like, wait, I had one at the party.

Anzu:Can we come up?

Benny:I showed you guys one.

Benny:You guys shouldn't have all of them.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:Well, thank you.

Arctos:Rapid connection.

Gamemaster:Yeah, it seems like it's not responding.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Start working out.

Johnny:this is

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:You get to take the long elevator ride back up.

Arctos:So on the way up, I'm like, so do you like like chocolates?

Arctos:Coffee?

Gamemaster:I get all of my nutrients from IV packs.

Benny:Thank you.

Arctos:Is there anything?

Arctos:OK, so I was raised.

Arctos:Prime Minister Vane, always give a gift as a thank you.

Arctos:You know, like a little, is there anything you know that I can send?

Gamemaster:Rapid connection?

Arctos:No, to you.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Gamemaster:Um... No.

Gamemaster:Uh... And the elevator continues upwards.

Gamemaster:After, uh...

Gamemaster:Sometime, eventually, as you feel the Fane recede slowly back down your body, as you continue upward, there is another grinding, screeching sound as the elevator comes to a halt at the lobby.

Arctos:Should I try even though I'm cursed?

Gamemaster:You're all welcome to exit.

Johnny:I got a photo.

Gamemaster:As you do...

Gamemaster:I need another perception check.

Gamemaster:We're doing perception checks every time you enter a new space.

Arctos:Okay.

Arctos:Oh, wait, is it two?

Arctos:Can we do two for this one?

Gamemaster:Yeah, if you like.

Arctos:Still cursed.

Anzu:Johnny on the spot.

Gamemaster:What did we get?

Johnny:30.

Gamemaster:30.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:As you exit the elevator into this new space, sorry, not a new space, you've been in this lobby before, but there is a notable difference this time around.

Arctos:Oh, no.

Gamemaster:As you exit out into the open lobby area from the elevator, there appear to be a series of new people.

Gamemaster:that kind of stand out from everybody else that looks like they've just come in through the front door to this facility.

Gamemaster:There are two people with pretty large iridescent host raiments, both of them wearing this...

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:garish, bright yellow-looking, like, T-shirt and jeans with a logo of, like, a smiley face emblazoned on one of the breasts, as well as six...

Benny:Crawford leaves in Concordia.

Gamemaster:other people wearing similar uniform stuff behind them.

Gamemaster:Can I get a society check, please?

Arctos:Just a real quick question.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Arctos:What were the names of the other people hunting this keystone?

Anzu:It would be... That's a... Yeah, I think this is probably the Concordia people, but let's make a society check and find out.

Gamemaster:That would be... Yeah.

Gamemaster:Please do.

Johnny:Why don't Tanner knows exactly who these guys are?

Benny:Oh.

Gamemaster:Ooh.

Gamemaster:Yeah, with a 31.

Anzu:Oh my god, it's Crawford Reeves and Lewis Muller of Concordia!

Gamemaster:With a 31 standing in front of you are Crawford Reeves and Lewis Mallard of Concordia.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:The bright yellow and the smiley face being the logo of Concordia.

Gamemaster:Which, also with your perception check that you're looking, you can see that there has been...

Gamemaster:Clearly an incident further in the parking lot from the entrance beyond the gate because you can see smoke rising out of the gatehouse to this facility.

Gamemaster:One of them, you don't know if it's Crawford or if it's Lewis, stands up or is already standing and addresses the four of you as well as anybody else who's standing in the lobby right now.

Johnny:Yes, he's still... Oh no, I don't like this at all.

Gamemaster:Actually, you can see whoever else is standing in the lobby right now.

Anzu:Are we still with the Archmechanic?

Benny:Just to get an idea of the lobby.

Arctos:Including the Archmaga.

Gamemaster:You are still with the Archmechanic.

Gamemaster:I'm just going to show you the lobby so that you have an idea of what it looks like.

Benny:I was interested in the chairs.

Arctos:We really should have used our other request to be like, hey, can you just not tell anyone else that you gave us the stone?

Arctos:Yeah, I guess it's not going to matter.

Johnny:I mean, they probably just followed us.

Benny:These are the last people looking for it, though, so this is great.

Benny:We can take

Benny:Kill them, spartal bees, in hell for the next six months, and no one else is looking for it, so we're good.

Johnny:They gave us... We have to fight Sbrtlby again.

Arctos:Hopefully Onik was on the trail and is also here as backup.

Anzu:Why are these two guys absolute freaks?

Anzu:Why are they not just normal people?

Gamemaster:Um...

Anzu:Oh my god.

Johnny:Why can't they just... Just be normal!

Benny:They're anime villains.

Benny:What are you, some demon?

Benny:No, I'm just a human with a lot of makeup.

Johnny:Why are we walking around?

Arctos:The stand user could be anyone.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:one of them, which you would be able to identify as Crawford Reeves.

Gamemaster:He's wearing the same bright yellow, but he's got this really, really long set of pinkish hair that moves...

Gamemaster:like it's flowing in the wind, despite the fact that you're indoors right now, uh, will, uh, take out, um, it looks like a piece of paper that he's holding on a clipboard and reading off of it.

Gamemaster:Uh, he says, according to Concordia's, uh, 14.8, uh, procedural charter, uh, you've all been declared happiness sinks and are requested to, uh,

Gamemaster:Give us all of your possessions, as it's known that at least one of you here is harboring something that is required for the happiness of all.

Gamemaster:You have five seconds to comply.

Gamemaster:Five, four, three, two, one.

Anzu:Um,

Benny:weapons drawn.

Johnny:Yeah, we're going, we're ready.

Gamemaster:Okay, yeah, absolutely.

Gamemaster:We're going to roll initiative then.

Arctos:Can I get a surprise initiative?

Gamemaster:And because...

Arctos:I'm kidding.

Gamemaster:Because you guys were friendly with the heart, you're going to get the aid of these submechanicers that will be piloted by the Archmechanic.

Johnny:Yes, we did this the right way.

Arctos:Yeah, the trick is to just be honest and not lie.

Arctos:Turns out that worked with these people.

Gamemaster:Can I...

Johnny:Incredible.

Johnny:I've rolled so many crits this session.

Johnny:This can't be a sign of bad things.

Gamemaster:Can I... That's crazy.

Benny:Yeah yellow versus red.

Gamemaster:Can I ask, out of curiosity, if one of you guys hover over the Submechanitor versus one of the people from Concordia, is the border different?

Anzu:It's yellow.

Johnny:Hmm?

Anzu:All right.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Okay, cool.

Gamemaster:I sent them to a different faction in Foundry, and I wanted to know if that, like, actually showed up for you guys.

Arctos:Yeah, it did.

Gamemaster:Now, one second.

Gamemaster:Let me roll a lot of initiatives.

Anzu:Kind of looked like Arctos just did a perception check and not an initiative perception check.

Johnny:Oh no.

Gamemaster:Oh no, Arctos did just a perception check.

Benny:I see it as initial perception.

Arctos:Oh, oopsie.

Benny:Oh, wait.

Anzu:Oh.

Benny:That's on Zoom.

Benny:Never mind.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Arctos, what did you get?

Arctos:I got 21.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:I also got a natural 20.

Anzu:Not quite as high as Johnny's ending number, but...

Gamemaster:Nice.

Arctos:I'm rolling up.

Arctos:Okay, never mind.

Arctos:That should be fine.

Arctos:I was seeing if I had any modifiers.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:So we will begin.

Johnny:Of course.

Gamemaster:With Johnny.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Johnny:We'll kick it off with a classic lingering composition.

Johnny:For this one, though, I'll look at everyone and I'll say, they think we aren't happy.

Johnny:I think we are.

Johnny:I think we can build happiness.

Johnny:I think we can.

Johnny:And then I'll pull out the little engine that could and just read the little engine that could.

Gamemaster:Good train theming.

Arctos:Did you prepare that for a fight with... This is a crazy initiative.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Johnny:I... Let's try that again.

Johnny:So I want to get this thing up.

Gamemaster:You gotta be prepared for a train-based fight, Jorge.

Gamemaster:It happens.

Anzu:Hmm.

Johnny:Okay.

Johnny:I think that's just a... I think that's just barely a regular success at this level.

Gamemaster:You are level 5, so that... Oh, are you level 5?

Johnny:Yeah.

Arctos:Oh.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you're level 5.

Gamemaster:That's a success.

Gamemaster:The level 5 is DC 20.

Johnny:Oh, nice.

Johnny:So that's just regular success.

Johnny:Amazing.

Johnny:I'm right next to Benjamin.

Benny:you

Johnny:There's a lot of guys.

Anzu:Mm hmm.

Johnny:Sorry, trying to decide how I want to do this.

Johnny:Yeah.

Johnny:I'm going to give this to Arctos this time.

Arctos:No, but I might be better on Benny.

Johnny:Seems like there's a lot of guys.

Johnny:I'll Flourish, Cast, Haste, unless Arctos, can you Haste yourself in any other way?

Johnny:Okay.

Johnny:Then I will give it to Benny.

Benny:Make haste.

Arctos:Appreciate it, though.

Johnny:I was thinking Benny's in here.

Arctos:I think Arctos is going to stay back and be a heal bot for us and the other Arctos.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:There.

Johnny:And this does affect all my allies, including the sub-mechanicers, the greatest anthem.

Johnny:And then last, third action.

Gamemaster:So let's see if I can update them to be your allies.

Anzu:Thank you.

Johnny:Third action.

Johnny:I will just attempt to demoralize.

Johnny:I'll do Crawford Reeves.

Johnny:I'll attempt to demoralize this dude with performance.

Johnny:My performance of the little engine that could is pretty scary.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:I don't know if it's that scary.

Gamemaster:A 22 performance?

Johnny:Just 22.

Gamemaster:That's a success.

Johnny:Oh.

Gamemaster:I think.

Johnny:Alright.

Johnny:He is...

Gamemaster:What is it against?

Gamemaster:The intimidation?

Gamemaster:Oh, Will DC against who?

Johnny:They're Will DC.

Johnny:Or they're Crawford Reeves.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Oh, I lied.

Gamemaster:That's just barely a failure.

Gamemaster:I apologize.

Arctos:Mad.

Johnny:That's a bummer.

Johnny:All right, that's my turn.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:That would bring up Anzu.

Anzu:Alright, we're going to start by casting Animated Assault as I kick up frickin' stuff.

Anzu:Let's see in what way.

Anzu:I can't hit both of them, that's so sad.

Anzu:Alright, well I can only hit two people for now.

Anzu:But that's OK.

Anzu:We're going to put it here.

Anzu:So there's a reflex save that you can make for Crawford Reeves and Happy Time Enforcer 6.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:The happy time enforcer succeeds, but Crawford fails.

Anzu:All right, I guess that's, we take that.

Anzu:10 points of bludgeoning damage to the both of them.

Anzu:Well, not to Happy Time Enforcer 6.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Halved to the Happy Time Enforcer.

Gamemaster:Crawford takes the full damage.

Anzu:And then I want to do a Recall Knowledge on Crawford Reeves.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:Is that what I want to do?

Anzu:Yeah.

Anzu:OK.

Anzu:With what skill might I do that?

Gamemaster:Nature or occultism.

Anzu:Oh, jeez.

Benny:Those mythic points...

Anzu:I've critically failed.

Gamemaster:I don't know if there's any effect for critically failing a recall knowledge check.

Anzu:Well, the tough thing is since we don't do secret rolls, I know that I've critically failed.

Gamemaster:Oh, yeah.

Gamemaster:I'm supposed to give you incorrect information.

Anzu:But that's almost dangerous because I could interpret it as being incorrect, so I don't know.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Anzu:I leave that to you.

Gamemaster:Tell me what you would have asked.

Anzu:I mean, I would have went for his lowest save.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You would learn that he has a lowest save.

Arctos:Uh.

Anzu:Yeah.

Anzu:That's sick.

Anzu:And with my third action, I will place a shield on myself.

Benny:Shield, shield, shield.

Anzu:Via magical means.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:All right.

Gamemaster:That'll bring us to Submechanitor 4.

Gamemaster:So, Mr. Darkmoor, the Archmechanic...

Gamemaster:Can't do combat.

Gamemaster:He's a civilian.

Gamemaster:He doesn't fight people.

Gamemaster:But what he can do is control the bodies of the peons elsewhere in the facility.

Gamemaster:So you watch as he just kind of points one of his hands over at somebody who looks like they were eating lunch just in the lobby when you guys popped up.

Gamemaster:And they immediately jerk up.

Gamemaster:point over at Happy Time Enforcer 2, uh, their arm sticks out, and a bolt of, like, flaming hot rebar launches out of their arm, uh, towards the, uh, towards Enforcer 2.

Johnny:Hello.

Gamemaster:So, we're gonna do that.

Gamemaster:And then...

Gamemaster:Pretend that that's fire instead of void.

Anzu:Mm hmm.

Gamemaster:Fort save.

Johnny:oh oh

Gamemaster:That does succeed, so only half damage, unfortunately.

Gamemaster:But they will take the half damage and I'll do some chip damage.

Gamemaster:And that's it, unfortunately, for these guys.

Arctos:I guess their plan was just come in here and then just furiously fight or command the heart to give something up.

Gamemaster:They can't do much.

Arctos:That's crazy.

Benny:They might be here because we're here.

Gamemaster:Take my force.

Benny:It's us.

Arctos:Yeah, but how would they have known?

Johnny:We're not really a subtle group.

Benny:There's locate spells.

Arctos:Yeah, but I feel like if they knew it was us, they would have just waited for us to go to Iconoclasm.

Arctos:I think they knew it was here and they just said bad timing.

Benny:I would not wait for people to go to their home base to attack them.

Arctos:I think it'd be much safer for them.

Johnny:Probably would have been.

Johnny:Oh, no.

Johnny:Lewis Maller.

Gamemaster:Lewis Mallard's turn.

Gamemaster:He's going to walk forward some feet so that he can actually get in range.

Gamemaster:Then he's going to cast a noise blast on you.

Gamemaster:I'm just going to do that.

Gamemaster:So it'll be Benny, Arctos, and Johnny.

Gamemaster:You all need to attempt that fort save.

Arctos:Do we get courageous anthem for this?

Benny:Uh.

Johnny:Kill this guy.

Gamemaster:Courageous Anthem, yes, it saves against fear effects, which this is not one of them.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:This is a concentrate, divine, manipulate, sonic action.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:So for the success, Johnny, you're going to take half damage.

Gamemaster:Benny and Arctos, you fail, so you're going to take full damage, and you're deafened for a round.

Benny:I'm going to bump that to a 20 with my reaction.

Benny:Does a 20 succeed?

Gamemaster:No.

Benny:Okay.

Gamemaster:Sorry.

Arctos:What what damage do I take again?

Gamemaster:You are going to take 27 points of Sonic damage.

Johnny:That's the damage.

Arctos:Alright alright.

Gamemaster:And that is the end of his turn.

Gamemaster:It's happy time in Forrester 6's turn.

Gamemaster:They're a little annoyed because somebody just attacked them.

Gamemaster:So I think they're going to aim for you.

Gamemaster:They're going to walk out over here.

Gamemaster:And they're going to aim for Anzu.

Gamemaster:And then they're going to make a strike with their pistol.

Anzu:Done.

Gamemaster:And it looks like that is going to hit.

Anzu:Done it even with my shield.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:So you're going to take two points of piercing damage.

Gamemaster:And they're going to follow it up with another pistol attack.

Anzu:Ow.

Anzu:Uh-oh.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:That one misses.

Anzu:Oof.

Gamemaster:Alright guys, that's your turn.

Arctos:Yeah, so I guess I'll, yeah, obviously I'm casting heal, but I'll cast it at the levels, at three action.

Arctos:Three action's useless.

Arctos:I'll just cast it at two action myself.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:No, I will treat wounds.

Anzu:Thank you.

Arctos:That's only one action.

Arctos:Battle medicine.

Gamemaster:Yep.

Arctos:Let me try that.

Arctos:OK.

Arctos:Battle medicine.

Arctos:It's over here.

Arctos:All right.

Benny:you you

Gamemaster:Critical success.

Johnny:all you

Gamemaster:Nice.

Arctos:I'm healed.

Arctos:I will then... Now I will cast a spell.

Gamemaster:Great.

Arctos:The spell shall be...

Arctos:Sorry, I'm just going to click the spell just to double check the difference between the two.

Arctos:Blessing helps us to attack.

Arctos:Bed addictions are AC.

Arctos:I will do bed addiction.

Arctos:OK.

Benny:This is the auditory trait.

Arctos:Oh, I'm deafened.

Arctos:I wouldn't have cast that.

Arctos:Might be.

Gamemaster:Okay, I mean, if you're deafened, you just have to make a flat check to see if you can cast it.

Arctos:Undo.

Arctos:Yeah, no, I just wouldn't have done that.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:I will move over here.

Gamemaster:Okay, he moves over there.

Arctos:and raise my shield.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Oh, yeah, yeah.

Arctos:Oh, it doesn't.

Benny:Yeah, if you perform an action as the auditory trait.

Arctos:So it would be fine, right?

Arctos:Oh, no, it doesn't, though.

Benny:Is casting a spell auditory?

Arctos:So I'll be fine.

Gamemaster:I thought a spell was, but I don't actually see... Maybe... Let me see... One second... Spells... Casting a spe-

Arctos:Oh, I thought I had to say auditory on the spell.

Anzu:Unless like the cast a spell action.

Johnny:He has the auditory trait.

Johnny:So there are like a lot of... Is there certain spells that have the auditory trait?

Gamemaster:I'll let you do it for now, but we'll have to figure out what it is in the future.

Johnny:Thank you.

Arctos:Okay.

Arctos:So I'll just cast that.

Arctos:I will cast Despair.

Benny:Apparently there is an addition to the GM core, but I'll send it.

Gamemaster:The deaf character can't detect anything using hearing, critically fails perception checks that require hearing, and is immune to auditory effects.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:These disabilities don't typically restrict their ability to cast spells or use magic items, but if they perform an action they're not accustomed to that performs auditory elements, they must succeed in a DC5 flat check or the action is lost.

Arctos:that make the checker well yeah we do need to i rolled it anyway to see if it would matter and it does so okay all right

Benny:you

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you don't need to roll it.

Gamemaster:I don't know what the actual rule is.

Gamemaster:I think technically all speech has the auditory trait is said somewhere in the rule book, but I don't know where and I can't find it.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:So... Um... Yeah.

Arctos:All right.

Arctos:Well, that's off, and I rose my shield.

Arctos:That is my turn.

Arctos:I did not move.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:I take my moves back.

Gamemaster:Enforcer...

Gamemaster:I think Enforcer 4 sees you casting spells during the Turbo Macarena.

Johnny:you you

Gamemaster:He's going to try and shoot you.

Gamemaster:And he misses.

Gamemaster:So he's going to spend the next two actions running at you.

Arctos:All right.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:It's this guy's turn.

Gamemaster:He's going to spend three actions just running right into the fray.

Gamemaster:Penny, it's your turn.

Benny:Oh, nice.

Benny:Let's see what we can do.

Benny:I'm just going to strike the happy time enforcer.

Benny:Nothing special.

Benny:This fucking falcata doesn't hit hard enough quite yet.

Benny:No, I'll double slice.

Benny:So we'll go with the Falcata first.

Benny:Sure.

Benny:That does not bode well for this person.

Gamemaster:Yep.

Johnny:No.

Gamemaster:Uh, okay.

Benny:All right, maybe.

Benny:That's crazy.

Gamemaster:You, uh, hit him with the Falcata, and you've done a bunch of damage.

Gamemaster:Um, and then you deal an additional 16, and in one turn he is mortal, but he is still standing.

Benny:Okay.

Gamemaster:And that one hits two.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Well.

Gamemaster:With the third crushing hit from your poly tool, you watch as there is this burst of green, sorry, of light blue light out of this person's eyes as they crumple to the ground.

Gamemaster:They're dead.

Benny:Nice.

Benny:And then I'll move.

Arctos:You could get next to them and Lewis to be able to smack him with an opportunity attack.

Johnny:yeah sam

Benny:But then when I leave the benediction, and I'm also already almost at half health, so I can't run in.

Arctos:Okay.

Arctos:I'll heal you next round.

Benny:I'll walk up here.

Benny:If Lewis wants to move, Lewis can move.

Gamemaster:All right.

Benny:That's my turn.

Gamemaster:It's Mechanitor 3's turn.

Gamemaster:We're just going to launch some rebar at the back line.

Gamemaster:That's all these guys are really good for.

Gamemaster:Oh.

Johnny:Come on guys.

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, this guy critically succeeded.

Gamemaster:So he dodges the rebar.

Gamemaster:Nothing happens.

Gamemaster:It's Crawford Reeves' turn.

Gamemaster:Crawford is going to... He kind of has to run at you guys.

Gamemaster:He doesn't have a lot of ranged stuff, so he'll do that.

Gamemaster:That is one action to get to you.

Anzu:Yikes.

Benny:oh yes yes yes

Anzu:That's so tough.

Johnny:Wow.

Gamemaster:he gets a mythic point oh no um okay so those of you within 30 feet of Crawford Reeves watch as he starts doing this really strange dance where his hair moves in a completely different direction to the rest of his body as it flows around and I need you to make this will save

Arctos:Yeah, it's a little scary for...

Arctos:Counter performance?

Gamemaster:This has the incapacitation, mental, primal, and visual traits, if that is relevant.

Benny:uh

Johnny:Oh, visual.

Johnny:Yeah, I'm going to counterperform.

Arctos:Yes.

Johnny:I start flipping my hair.

Anzu:Johnny starts flipping his hair with his hand.

Arctos:I hope you can succeed on this one, buddy.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you make a performance check and you critically fail it.

Arctos:No.

Johnny:No, I'll use my last point.

Johnny:Yeah, I'll use my last point.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Yo, thank you.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:And you critically fail it.

Johnny:What?

Arctos:Well, at least you get another one.

Johnny:This is balancing out my Nat 20s.

Arctos:You get your mythic back.

Johnny:I'm so sorry, everybody.

Arctos:We just rolled three nat ones in a row.

Gamemaster:So if you want, you guys can choose to take a 22 critical failure instead of the roll that you made.

Johnny:Come back around.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:No, I'm okay.

Benny:I'm good.

Johnny:you

Gamemaster:So if you failed, you are fascinated.

Gamemaster:Which means you have to spend at least one of your actions on your turn to move closer to Mr. Crawford Reeves.

Gamemaster:If you end your movement or turn adjacent to Crawford, you will be slowed.

Anzu:Wait, he's already slowed?

Gamemaster:Just FYI.

Arctos:Just quick question.

Arctos:I assume it doesn't matter, but it is incapacitate.

Arctos:Is the spell high enough level or feature?

Gamemaster:He is a higher level than you, yes.

Arctos:Yeah, I figured.

Arctos:I figured.

Arctos:All right.

Johnny:Oh.

Gamemaster:Okay, and for Johnny who succeeded, you're just slowed.

Gamemaster:Uh-huh.

Anzu:Having succeeded.

Gamemaster:But once it wears off, he'll be immune to this particular effect for the next 24 hours.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:The other ones will, so long as they have this effect on them, continue to be slowed if they enter their turn next to Crawford.

Anzu:I rolled as well.

Anzu:The range was what?

Gamemaster:Oh, did you?

Gamemaster:Yes, no, Anzu, you succeeded.

Gamemaster:So you're also slowed.

Gamemaster:That's the end of Crawford's turn.

Gamemaster:Now it's a lot of happy time enforcers' turns.

Johnny:um

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:This guy's going to go... He's going to spend two actions to go over here.

Arctos:Not bueno.

Gamemaster:And then I think he's going to aim for Arctos.

Gamemaster:And he's going to do a pistol shot with his pistol.

Gamemaster:And his pistol shot with his pistol gets a miss.

Gamemaster:That's the end of his turn.

Anzu:Oh my god.

Gamemaster:This guy's turn, he's going to spend two actions.

Gamemaster:to get there.

Gamemaster:And then he's going to use his third action, I think, to attack the bird.

Arctos:Submechanica have a reaction strike.

Gamemaster:He does not.

Anzu:These guys are not as tanky as they appear to be.

Gamemaster:None of these guys even have reactives.

Anzu:They are corporate drones after all.

Arctos:We're really going to jump these fuckers.

Arctos:I see why these stand users were just going to power through them.

Johnny:Yeah.

Anzu:Oh my god.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Anzu:So annoying.

Gamemaster:Unfortunately, that does hit.

Gamemaster:So you are going to take three points of piercing damage.

Anzu:Ouch.

Gamemaster:And then it's this guy's turn.

Benny:I have used my reaction.

Gamemaster:That's one action.

Gamemaster:That's a second action.

Gamemaster:And then it's going to attack Benny.

Johnny:we'll do

Gamemaster:You have... I rolled very low.

Benny:Thank God.

Gamemaster:I don't know why it's showing off the Benediction or the shield, as if that meaningfully affected it, given that I rolled 12 total.

Arctos:Well, it's a critical.

Benny:you

Gamemaster:But... Submit Canada 1 is going to shoot something at Happy Time Enforcer 5.

Arctos:That's what they wanted to show us, critical bits.

Gamemaster:Happy Time Enforcer 5 is going to roll this fourth save.

Gamemaster:and succeed, so they're going to take half of this.

Gamemaster:Okay, and then Submechanitor under 2 is going to do the same thing at number 3, so they're going to roll a fort save.

Gamemaster:They succeed, so they're going to take half damage.

Gamemaster:Damage.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:And that brings us to the bottom of the initiative.

Gamemaster:So the heart gets to do something.

Anzu:Who says no?

Arctos:Oh.

Benny:Triple Benny's hit points.

Johnny:Oh, we have the heart on our side.

Johnny:We're friends with him.

Arctos:He literally said that.

Johnny:Yeah.

Johnny:Benny grows four feet.

Gamemaster:He cripples Benny's hit points.

Gamemaster:That's what you said, right?

Johnny:Hey.

Benny:The monkey paw curls.

Benny:It doesn't even misinterpret.

Benny:He just heard me wrong.

Gamemaster:He doesn't have ears.

Gamemaster:He has a bunch of gears, okay?

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:There is a gear that manifests directly underneath Crawford.

Johnny:Oh, no.

Gamemaster:And you watch as a symbol of a gear gets burned onto his forehead.

Arctos:Yes.

Gamemaster:You don't know what that does necessarily, but something's happened.

Gamemaster:Brings us to the top of the inorder.

Gamemaster:It's Johnny's turn.

Arctos:Probably bad.

Johnny:Let's see how many people are going before.

Johnny:A lot of people are going before Benny.

Johnny:Benny, how badly injured are you?

Benny:Two thirds.

Benny:Less than two thirds?

Johnny:Two-thirds injured?

Benny:No, two thirds left.

Arctos:Check yourself.

Arctos:I also have healing, so.

Johnny:Okay.

Johnny:I will give you a second round.

Johnny:Yeah, there's a lot of people that want to... Okay.

Johnny:In that case, I will try and get something off.

Johnny:I'll try and get something else off.

Johnny:I'm going to try and...

Arctos:You could heal him.

Arctos:I'm not going to stop you from healing him.

Johnny:I'm going to try and do something else.

Johnny:I'll do this to this guy first.

Johnny:I'm going to bone mow this guy.

Johnny:This guy being Robert Reeves.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:It's a 27 succeed.

Gamemaster:A 27... What is that?

Gamemaster:Yes, it is a success.

Gamemaster:Against its will, DC.

Johnny:Just a regular success?

Gamemaster:Just a regular success.

Johnny:Yeah, I'll drop a second level, second rank soothe on Benjamin.

Benny:Benjamin.

Arctos:Ooh, much better.

Johnny:What was that?

Benny:Benny will take it.

Johnny:That should have been second level.

Johnny:I'm so sorry.

Benny:Oh.

Johnny:Let me recast that.

Johnny:There we go.

Arctos:Now Benny just needs to get hit a bunch more so I can heal him again too.

Anzu:All right.

Benny:All right.

Johnny:And I think some... That is my turn since I'm slowed.

Gamemaster:That is the end of your turn.

Benny:Well, there's seven people going for a penny.

Johnny:I hope I'm no longer slowed.

Gamemaster:You are no longer slowed.

Gamemaster:It's Sansa's turn.

Anzu:I'm slowed.

Gamemaster:You are slowed.

Anzu:I was really hoping that people would end up arranged in a more satisfying way for me.

Gamemaster:Sorry.

Anzu:But it's okay.

Anzu:I'm going to cast an Amped Telekinetic Rend anyway.

Anzu:Let me place some 5-foot Bursts.

Benny:Over.

Johnny:you you

Anzu:We will go for Crawford Reeves and this happy time enforcer.

Gamemaster:Okay, a little fort saves for them.

Gamemaster:The Enforcer fails, and so does Crawford.

Johnny:Yeah.

Anzu:All right.

Gamemaster:Okay, 14 points of bludgeoning damage.

Gamemaster:The Happytime Enforcer is bloodied!

Anzu:Beautiful.

Anzu:I don't know if this guy is capable of, but I can't get too far away.

Anzu:I'm kind of of the mind to do a beak strike at this happy time enforcer.

Gamemaster:You critically beat.

Arctos:He's going to brain someone.

Anzu:Because I don't have a great other thing to do in this exact moment.

Anzu:So we'll try it.

Anzu:They've got pretty low ACs.

Anzu:Yes, yes.

Arctos:Right into the eye.

Johnny:okay

Anzu:He sets on fire.

Gamemaster:He takes 14 damage and sets on fire.

Benny:That was... It was max damage.

Gamemaster:Oh my god.

Anzu:That is so dumb.

Benny:At least for the piercing part.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Anzu:That is so dumb.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:Great.

Anzu:That's my turn.

Gamemaster:You are no longer slowed.

Arctos:There's an anime thing where his eye gets a glisten of light.

Gamemaster:It's up in Canada Forrester.

Johnny:Nice.

Anzu:And I go, oh my gosh, he's so close.

Benny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:We're doing this on Happy Time Enforcer 3, because he can't actually target people adjacent to him.

Gamemaster:That fails, so we're going to deal full damage.

Anzu:Incredible.

Gamemaster:We're going to deal full damage.

Arctos:Yo.

Gamemaster:Nine points.

Gamemaster:The Happy Time Enforcer is just barely hanging on, but is still standing.

Gamemaster:It's Lewis Maller's turn.

Johnny:Josh.

Anzu:Josh, I have a question.

Gamemaster:Huh?

Anzu:If I don't sustain a spell, does it end?

Gamemaster:Yes.

Anzu:Okay.

Anzu:I didn't really need it to be around anymore anyway, but all three of my things can go away.

Anzu:I don't know how to do that.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:If you switch to the measurement controls, the top left, the ruler-looking thing, you can then click on it and press delete to get rid of it.

Anzu:Uh-huh.

Gamemaster:Yep.

Johnny:I'm sorry, but he what's his name?

Johnny:Crawford Reeves should have taken five points of mental damage.

Johnny:Oh, six points of mental damage from Bonmo.

Gamemaster:Oh, right, right, right, right, right.

Gamemaster:You're totally right.

Gamemaster:I've dealt him the damage.

Gamemaster:Okay, well, Louie Mallor is going to walk over here so that you're all in his aura.

Gamemaster:And then he's going to do another noise blast.

Johnny:Is it an aura two?

Gamemaster:10-foot burst.

Gamemaster:There's going to be some collateral here.

Johnny:you

Anzu:This isn't the thing that slowed us before.

Gamemaster:Johnny Arctos and Anzu, you have to make this fort save.

Anzu:This is a different thing.

Gamemaster:This is a different thing.

Gamemaster:This is a noise blast.

Gamemaster:He's noise blasting you.

Gamemaster:Where a cacophonous noise blasts out.

Arctos:Goddammit, I cannot roll well.

Anzu:Oh, boy.

Gamemaster:Whoa.

Gamemaster:Everybody but Johnny fails, including the happy time enforcer, who is on fire.

Johnny:Like I did yet.

Gamemaster:So Johnny's going to take half damage, and everybody else is going to take the full damage here.

Arctos:So just, silly question.

Arctos:If I'm deafened, can I even take the damage from a noise blast?

Gamemaster:Yes, because this has the sonic trait and not the auditory trait.

Arctos:Gotcha, gotcha.

Gamemaster:You're being attacked with the physical force of sound.

Anzu:Alright, we take those.

Arctos:Gotcha, gotcha.

Benny:Not the sound of sound.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:Does he kill his happy in time enforcer?

Gamemaster:Yes.

Arctos:Yes.

Johnny:A bad time.

Gamemaster:Calm the collateral.

Gamemaster:It happens.

Gamemaster:He doesn't particularly care about that guy.

Gamemaster:There's another burst of light blue light out of this guy's eyeballs as his skull gets caved in by the sound.

Benny:The fuck?

Benny:He's not having a happy time at all.

Gamemaster:It's the other happy time enforcers.

Gamemaster:Yeah, they're all having bad, bad times.

Gamemaster:Bad, bad, bad, bad.

Gamemaster:This guy isn't going to move.

Gamemaster:I think he's just going to take pot shots at people.

Gamemaster:Let's make one at the bird, because he just saw the bird peck a guy so hard he set on fire.

Gamemaster:That probably scared him a little bit.

Anzu:Indeed.

Gamemaster:That hits.

Gamemaster:So you're going to take five points of piercing damage.

Johnny:you

Anzu:Ah!

Gamemaster:I think he's just going to unload the whole clip at you.

Gamemaster:I don't think the other two have any chance of hitting, so it's fine.

Anzu:Oh my god.

Gamemaster:That's it.

Gamemaster:Arctos, it's your turn.

Gamemaster:You are still deafened, and you are also fascinated.

Arctos:So how's the Fascinate work again?

Arctos:OK, cool.

Gamemaster:You have to spend at least one action moving towards Crawford.

Benny:flanking flanking flanking get behind him and tape we're gonna tabletop

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:Give me one second, though.

Arctos:Arc Dosed.

Johnny:With this eight foot bear.

Gamemaster:Okay, so you have to spend at least one of your actions moving closer to Crawford, and if you end your movement or a turn adjacent to Crawford, you are slowed one until the end of your next turn.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:So I, crisis of faith, Tim, needs to make a save.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:I assume he's divine, right?

Gamemaster:He is not a Divinecaster.

Arctos:Huh?

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:I apologize.

Gamemaster:The little dance that he used on you didn't have the divine trait.

Gamemaster:Also wasn't to spell.

Gamemaster:He critically succeeds.

Gamemaster:He's unaffected.

Anzu:Very interesting.

Arctos:So nothing happens.

Gamemaster:He has no faith for you to crisis.

Arctos:Boo.

Johnny:Faithless.

Arctos:Well, I'll go... Actually, yeah, I guess I'll just go here.

Gamemaster:Okay, you are slowed.

Arctos:All right, that's only when I end the turn, right?

Gamemaster:No, when you end your movement, or your turn ends and you're next to him.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:Slowed.

Arctos:So that affects this turn, so I'm out of stuff to do.

Arctos:All right.

Gamemaster:All right.

Gamemaster:It's happy time.

Gamemaster:Enforcer's turn.

Gamemaster:Enforcer.

Gamemaster:He's going to attack Benny because Benny is here.

Gamemaster:We're enforcing.

Benny:We're enforcing.

Gamemaster:He's going to make a short sword attack you and he's going to miss.

Benny:We're enforcing happiness.

Gamemaster:And then he's going to do Flurry of Blows, by which I mean just two more attacks.

Gamemaster:It's not a Flurry of Blows.

Gamemaster:And he's going to critically miss all those.

Gamemaster:So that's the end of his turn.

Gamemaster:I think this guy's dead.

Gamemaster:Is this guy dead?

Gamemaster:This guy's dead.

Gamemaster:I'm going to skip him.

Arctos:Benny, kill him.

Gamemaster:It's Benny's turn.

Arctos:Kill the Crawford.

Gamemaster:Benny!

Gamemaster:It's your turn.

Benny:We are going to...

Johnny:Coming out of the gate.

Benny:Double slice.

Benny:We're going to start off aggressive with the Falcata.

Arctos:Yes.

Gamemaster:The boy is double slicing.

Benny:A heavy sword.

Arctos:But light enough to have one hand.

Arctos:Ooh.

Benny:Yes.

Gamemaster:It's a hit.

Benny:attack two it's a 26 hit on reeves and for my final action

Gamemaster:14 points of damage.

Gamemaster:OK.

Gamemaster:Crawford takes 14 points of damage.

Gamemaster:So I see you rolled something, but it hasn't loaded on my screen.

Johnny:you you

Gamemaster:So I don't know what you actually got.

Arctos:It says hit.

Gamemaster:Oh, OK.

Gamemaster:If that hits, you'll take an additional 12 points of damage.

Arctos:We have the, this was with flanking, right?

Arctos:Automatically does that.

Gamemaster:Oh, shoot.

Gamemaster:One second.

Gamemaster:Did it take that into account on your... It didn't take it into account.

Benny:I don't see him flanked.

Gamemaster:So you actually crit on that first hit you made with the Falcata with a minus 2 to his AC.

Arctos:Yes!

Arctos:Yes.

Johnny:That's so nasty.

Benny:Oh, OK.

Benny:So undo the 14 damage.

Arctos:Give him back the 14.

Arctos:Oh, that's so mean.

Gamemaster:Okay, I will undo the 14 damage.

Benny:Oh, golly.

Gamemaster:And then instead administer the 47 damage.

Gamemaster:He's still standing, but he's looking way worse than with the 14 damage at him.

Johnny:So much more.

Johnny:The falcata hit him, and he went, that's not bad, and then it finished carving through.

Benny:So actually, let me see.

Arctos:He twisted.

Arctos:Blazing batter.

Gamemaster:And he's on fire.

Gamemaster:Why is everybody setting all my enemies on fire?

Gamemaster:That's illegal.

Benny:Oh, yeah.

Benny:OK.

Benny:So that was attack one and two.

Benny:That was the fury.

Benny:And so I'm not slowed yet.

Benny:So I still have all four.

Benny:Because I'm hasted.

Gamemaster:Yep.

Benny:We're going to do a quick reversal because I'm flanked and I can finally do this.

Arctos:Thank you.

Benny:So make a melee strike against one of the flanking enemies and a second one with the same weapon or unarmed against a different enemy that is flanking you.

Benny:So it's got the same map as I currently have, which is still two, so I guess it's not really that worth it.

Benny:But this is going to be the poly tool.

Benny:Yeah, we're going to do...

Benny:Yeah, so this is going to be on Reeves.

Benny:And then this one is going to be on.

Gamemaster:You miss Reeves, unfortunately.

Benny:But I hit the enforcement.

Gamemaster:You hit the happy time enforcer, though.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:So that was one action.

Johnny:Well.

Benny:And then for my next action, I am going to.

Gamemaster:Crazy.

Gamemaster:You can either attack or that's it because you can't move away because you're fascinated.

Benny:So let's go ahead and attack.

Gamemaster:He's run out of map.

Benny:Yeah, this would be the third action I'm taking with max map.

Gamemaster:You've maxed out your map.

Benny:Let's see if I get a 20.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:You didn't.

Johnny:Nice.

Gamemaster:I'm sorry.

Benny:That's okay.

Gamemaster:It's Submechanic3's turn.

Gamemaster:He's going to do what you expect him to do.

Gamemaster:I think we're probably going to try and take out the guy flanking him.

Benny:Do it.

Benny:Do it now.

Gamemaster:He failed, so he's going to take full damage.

Gamemaster:It didn't kill him, unfortunately.

Gamemaster:It's Crawford's turn.

Gamemaster:We're at an interesting point right now, because he has the gear burned into his head.

Gamemaster:Which means that if he makes a hostile action, he's going to take damage.

Arctos:yes he's going to hit a child

Gamemaster:But he's looking real bad.

Anzu:Thank you.

Gamemaster:But I don't have anything to do for him that isn't, I think, a hostile action.

Gamemaster:So we're just going to do it.

Johnny:Risk it.

Johnny:This guy is an anime character.

Gamemaster:He's going to attempt to bludgeon Benny with his prehensile hair.

Benny:disgusting.

Gamemaster:That's a hit.

Gamemaster:So we're going to roll damage.

Gamemaster:You're going to take 13 points of damage.

Gamemaster:and 1d6 persistent bleed, as his prehensile hair is razor sharp.

Gamemaster:But since he took a hostile action, he's going to immediately take 5d10.

Anzu:I see this as an absolute win.

Gamemaster:What kind of damage is this?

Gamemaster:Slashing damage, as the gear symbol on his head explodes into a bunch of rust.

Johnny:Hey, it's a good thing we... Oh.

Arctos:I guess it makes sense that an all-powerful heart has some juice.

Gamemaster:I rolled really poorly on that.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:But it's enough to kill him anyway.

Johnny:It's dead.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:So Crawford cuts a child with his hair and then explodes into a cloud of rust.

Arctos:And then he burns up.

Gamemaster:And then his rust burns.

Gamemaster:Yes.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Uh, happy time enforcers, happy time, happy time.

Gamemaster:I think he's decided to fill the gap that's been provided.

Anzu:a fool.

Gamemaster:And it's gonna go for Benny.

Arctos:Opportunity attack, Benny?

Benny:Oh, yeah.

Benny:Do I get this opportunity attack while they're flanked?

Gamemaster:What do you mean, wow, they're flanked?

Gamemaster:Um, yeah, because they're flanked.

Benny:Because they moved.

Gamemaster:They moved into flanking position.

Gamemaster:Oh, this is gonna end really poorly for him, unless you miss.

Johnny:Oh.

Benny:It's not a wise move.

Gamemaster:Yeah, you critically hit.

Benny:Yeah.

Gamemaster:Just roll damage.

Gamemaster:It's fine.

Arctos:Oh, it's a shame it wasn't with the Falcata.

Gamemaster:It's totally fine.

Benny:The Falcata, unfortunately,

Gamemaster:He has three hit points.

Benny:Oh, nice.

Benny:Yeah, the Falcata, unfortunately, until next level, is two less than the other weapons I have.

Arctos:Ah.

Benny:So it is reserved for the first attack of turns.

Gamemaster:Step.

Benny:That's very unfortunate.

Benny:Oh, okay.

Gamemaster:He didn't even need to step.

Benny:Step right up.

Johnny:Oh, no.

Gamemaster:He could have just strided, but that's fine.

Gamemaster:He's going to make a short sword attack.

Gamemaster:He crit!

Gamemaster:He crit a short sword attack.

Johnny:Benny.

Gamemaster:And because you're off guard, he deals sneak attack damage.

Benny:Okay.

Anzu:No!

Johnny:Oh, no.

Anzu:Dang!

Gamemaster:You're going to take 24 points of short sword shank damage.

Johnny:Trotter Trank.

Gamemaster:And I'm going to do a...

Anzu:I thought these guys were just a bunch of nothing.

Benny:Okay.

Gamemaster:And he misses his other hit.

Johnny:Nice.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:It is rebar time.

Gamemaster:We'll do it on the guy that just attacked Benny.

Gamemaster:He critically felled.

Gamemaster:So his head explodes as a bar of rebar just goes right through it.

Anzu:Thank you.

Arctos:Yes.

Johnny:Correct.

Gamemaster:And then it's this guy's turn.

Gamemaster:We'll just do the other guy that Benny can see.

Gamemaster:Because he's right in front of that set of the Canada.

Gamemaster:Swirl a fort save.

Gamemaster:He fails, so he's going to take full damage.

Gamemaster:This is his first damage of the evening, but he's going to take seven points of it.

Johnny:Okay.

Gamemaster:Johnny, it's your turn.

Johnny:Yeah, I'm right up against Lewis Maller.

Johnny:I don't know what this guy's deal is.

Johnny:But... First, I will try and bon-mo him.

Gamemaster:Yeah, sure.

Johnny:That's a failure.

Johnny:I will use my last mythic point.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:to rebonmo.

Arctos:Thank you.

Johnny:He's got a high will.

Johnny:Even worse.

Johnny:Oh, wait, that's a success.

Gamemaster:But you're mythic, so it succeeds.

Johnny:Oh, excellent.

Anzu:Thank you.

Johnny:I think this guy's got to be very good.

Gamemaster:And then does he take six damage?

Johnny:Oh, yes, he does.

Johnny:Oh, I forgot about that.

Johnny:Thank you.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:What else?

Johnny:He does take 6 damage.

Johnny:And then... Gosh, I don't think this will work because this guy is pretty willy.

Johnny:But we'll try it anyway.

Johnny:I'm going to cast Roaring Applause on this guy.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:He has to make this wheel safe.

Gamemaster:He fails because he's been bond mode.

Johnny:I'm so excited.

Anzu:Incredible.

Johnny:I'm waiting to use this.

Johnny:I got this specifically for Benny.

Johnny:So he has not only slowed, but he applauds so vigorously that it triggers reactions.

Gamemaster:At the start of his turn, it'll trigger a reaction.

Johnny:Yep.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:I think Benny's out of reach.

Johnny:Does it come back around?

Benny:Wait.

Arctos:you

Gamemaster:He starts clapping so much that he's slowed, and at the start of his turn, he just has the manipulate trick.

Johnny:I don't think it will.

Johnny:I don't think that he's close enough to you to... That's a bummer.

Gamemaster:It's ridiculous.

Johnny:And for my final action of the night, I will... God, I don't really have a whole lot of stuff.

Johnny:I'll just try and stab this guy.

Johnny:Why not?

Johnny:I have to draw it.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Johnny:Apparently it was not drawn.

Gamemaster:Benny, I'm just updating.

Gamemaster:You should be slowed because you entered your turn next to What's-His-Face.

Benny:Mm hmm.

Johnny:Oh, I hit.

Gamemaster:So I'm just adding that.

Gamemaster:You do hit.

Gamemaster:You're just stabbing him?

Johnny:Yep, that's what we got.

Gamemaster:Seven points of damage.

Johnny:Yep.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:All right.

Gamemaster:Next up would be Anzu.

Anzu:Okay, I've got a great plan.

Anzu:First, I'm going to unleash my psyche.

Anzu:Then I need to move.

Johnny:you

Anzu:Nope, that's not how you move.

Anzu:To here.

Anzu:Then I will cast at Lewis.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Benny:Thank you.

Anzu:An amped telekinetic projectile.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Anzu:Oh, I'm working on it.

Gamemaster:That hits.

Anzu:I've hit.

Johnny:Oh, that's... Oh!

Gamemaster:Roll damage.

Anzu:So he will take.

Arctos:He's a wombo combo.

Anzu:27 points of damage.

Anzu:And because it is amped, he is pushed five feet away from me.

Gamemaster:Not bad.

Gamemaster:And?

Johnny:Yes!

Gamemaster:Oh my god.

Gamemaster:Okay, absolutely.

Johnny:The alley-oop!

Gamemaster:He takes the 27 damage and is pushed next to Benny.

Johnny:The alley-oop!

Anzu:Come on.

Arctos:Benny Wapham.

Johnny:Wow.

Anzu:Come on.

Johnny:This is... It's cut.

Benny:All right, all right, all right.

Anzu:And then we're going to...

Johnny:The poncho boys are coming back around.

Anzu:It won't be till his turn, I think.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Arctos:the heart's like,

Anzu:Oh, well.

Benny:Oh, okay.

Benny:I don't know how much longer he's going to... It's... Fair enough.

Gamemaster:So it's supposed to happen at the beginning of his turn.

Gamemaster:You weren't supposed to roll yet.

Benny:Oh, okay.

Gamemaster:But we'll keep that crit for when it is his turn, because you just rolled it.

Gamemaster:It's fine.

Gamemaster:So his days are numbered.

Anzu:He has to do this for now.

Gamemaster:Yeah, let's make a will or reflex.

Anzu:Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Anzu:Is his will affected by Johnny right now or no?

Anzu:All right, we'll do that.

Johnny:Yeah, he's got mine too.

Gamemaster:Yes, he's bond mode, which reduces his will save.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:He fails.

Gamemaster:Does he have more points of mental damage?

Anzu:Incredible.

Gamemaster:He's in crit range.

Anzu:That's the end of my turn.

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Submit Candidate 4.

Gamemaster:I think... Yeah, the Submit Candidate's DC isn't high enough.

Gamemaster:He's not going to go for Lewis.

Gamemaster:He'll just go for that Happy Time Enforcer that's just all the way in the back there.

Gamemaster:Just hanging out.

Gamemaster:Let's see.

Gamemaster:Oh, I rolled well.

Johnny:um um

Gamemaster:It's going to take half damage.

Gamemaster:Half a nine is four.

Gamemaster:That's how math works.

Gamemaster:It's Lewis's turn.

Gamemaster:Lewis is slowed.

Gamemaster:Lewis is just clapping.

Gamemaster:Benny gets a crit into his back.

Benny:Damage 53

Arctos:Oh.

Gamemaster:Oh, no.

Gamemaster:Louie Mallard has 53 hit points.

Arctos:Oh.

Anzu:Oh, no.

Arctos:Yes.

Johnny:You know what's great about this spell?

Gamemaster:He has exactly 53 hit points.

Johnny:You know what's so great about this spell too?

Johnny:Even if he hadn't died, it's a sustained spell.

Johnny:It just goes on as long as I keep sustaining it.

Gamemaster:He just has to keep clapping?

Johnny:He's gonna keep laughing and he slowed.

Gamemaster:Absolutely.

Gamemaster:At the beginning of his turn, a sword just bursts out of his chest from his back and he collapses to the ground.

Benny:Fantastic.

Gamemaster:There is a flash of blue light from the eyes of the remaining enforcers who then collapse to the ground.

Johnny:That's great.

Anzu:Well, I got to make note to make some kind of roll about that.

Gamemaster:And that's where we'll end today's session.

Arctos:wow that was dope

Gamemaster:Good murder.

Gamemaster:That is a crazy combo.

Gamemaster:The clapping into knocking him back five feet into full grit.

Anzu:I was going to cast a different spell that just pushes.

Gamemaster:It's crazy.

Gamemaster:Good battlefield control.

Anzu:Then I was like, wait, if I hit with the projectile, it pushes anyway.

Johnny:That was so good.

Johnny:That was a great session.

Gamemaster:You guys got stuff done.

Gamemaster:You're friends with another heart.

Benny:yeah we did yeah we did correct things got allies that we know of

Arctos:Is there any other people that want this besides these two?

Arctos:I think those are it, that we know of.

Gamemaster:So, Anouk and Anaïs, when they asked the Harlequin what the other groups were, got them, you, Sbrtlby Jones, and these two people from Concordia.

Arctos:Yeah.

Arctos:So I guess we now need to just hold on to the heart, to the gemstone.

Johnny:We got the gemstone.

Anzu:We go on six.

Johnny:We not.

Anzu:Yeah, we're going on six month lockdown.

Anzu:Nobody leaves.

Gamemaster:I will say two things to that point.

Gamemaster:First of all, you level up because you've eliminated the other stuff.

Arctos:Bye.

Johnny:Level six.

Gamemaster:The other thing is that you have the Keystone.

Gamemaster:The next thing related to the Keystone is six months from now.

Gamemaster:So we have the opportunity for a little bit or a lot of bit of downtime, if you guys wish, as we skip forward those six months.

Gamemaster:If there were like...

Gamemaster:big-ticket explore things you wanted to do in those six months, let me know.

Gamemaster:But otherwise, you should come up with what you would want to do in the downtime over the course of the next six months.

Anzu:Fascinating.

Arctos:I wonder if Vane's going to be in session for six more months.

Johnny:Level 6 is so good.

Johnny:That was so rude.

Gamemaster:And of course, when...

Gamemaster:Six months pass and you go back and the majordomo is just like, yeah, I'm sorry.

Gamemaster:He's just, he's still there.

Gamemaster:I still have an appointment for a week from now, though, if that's useful.

Benny:you

Arctos:These guys are assholes.

Gamemaster:Which one's Concordia or Prime Meridian?

Arctos:Concordia.

Arctos:No, Primarian's great.

Gamemaster:Concordia just wants everybody to be happy.

Anzu:Yes, we were happiness sinks, Jorge.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Gamemaster:You were providing for the happiness of others.

Anzu:Jeez.

Johnny:Okay.

Anzu:I don't know what to do with the next six months.

Gamemaster:Hmm.

Arctos:Go talk to Grandma.

Gamemaster:You've got some time to think about it.

Gamemaster:Do you have a week?

Gamemaster:Does next Monday work?

Arctos:It's not up for me.

Anzu:Sure thing.

Benny:Mm-hmm.

Anzu:Why not?

Gamemaster:Okay.

Gamemaster:Sounds like a plan to me.

Anzu:Wow, big success.

Gamemaster:Remember at some point once... Yeah, you guys did a good murder.

Gamemaster:At some point, you guys should, once Pathbuilder's back up, send me your character sheets.

Anzu:I think it might be back up already.

Gamemaster:Oh, exciting.

Johnny:it's back up yeah yeah it's working for me right now

Gamemaster:They might have just IP banned you, Jorge.

Anzu:Well, unless it went up and then went back down and I just have it loaded.

Anzu:That is possible.

Arctos:Does it work for you?

Arctos:Anyone else?

Benny:I'm not pressing refresh.

Anzu:Mike hasn't refreshed since we started the campaign.

Arctos:Okay.

Gamemaster:I got a Cloudflare block, and now it says too many requests.

Benny:That's pretty accurate.

Gamemaster:This user has sent too many requests at a given amount of time.

Anzu:That's the error it was giving me.

Arctos:Yes.

Gamemaster:but that's because I'm DDoSing in, so.

Benny:I was about to say, don't play dumb with us, Josh.

Arctos:Yeah.

Benny:Oh, it says my IP is requesting to.

Arctos:Yeah, well...

Johnny:Josh Razor.

Benny:All the Philips light bulbs.

Anzu:It says cease and desist?

Benny:Send it back.

Benny:With an FBI screen.

Arctos:Why does it have my name and address in this response?

Gamemaster:Is this my webcam?

Gamemaster:How'd they do that?

Gamemaster:And it's down because my server's haunted.

Arctos:Guys, we didn't even think about it.

Arctos:Pathbuilder's run by Josh.

Arctos:That's... And you're getting DDoSed.

Anzu:Crazy how this all is coming out now.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Johnny:oh it all comes together

Anzu:Crazy.

Arctos:Yeah.

Gamemaster:The truth comes out.

Arctos:Adios.

Gamemaster:Yeah.

Anzu:Good night, everybody.

Gamemaster:See y'all.

Arctos:And that.

Benny:Adios.